this is my gun alter

about

[altercourse]

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18+ SYSTEM SERVER !!!!!!!!!!!

[multiplicitymemes]

[ryanphantom]

[altercourse]

when an endo joins the server

[forpiscesmoved-deactivated20200]

me at 4 am on a school night

[altercourse]

what's the point of syscourse?

whats the point of this ask

[altercourse]

general discourse server.........

https://discord.gg/RJ237CE

[altercourse]

quoigenic = neither traumagenic nor endogenic. lots of possible reasons -- not knowing, not caring, thinking "were you caused by trauma" is unanswerable in their particular circumstances, wanting to recognize different system members having different ideas, wanting to keep it private, having some specific theory that isn't necessarily covered by "typical traumagenic" or "typical endogenic", etc. it's a purposefully broad definition, paralleling "quoiromantic" specifically.

oh worm thanks for the info B) -mod skitty

[altercourse]

whats a quoigenic system

i havent seen that term ???? anyone can answer bc i want to Know

[altercourse]

Do you think being beaten, gaslighted, forced to participate in arguments and "choose sides" between family members and emotionally stamped on as a kid is enough to give someone alters? I'm asking for a friend questioning being a system without the access to therapy or the like.

i mean personally yaa. like. when youre a kid literally every bad thing is the worst thing that has happened to you. literally. and shit like that can tear apart a kids psyche. you dont even know if you like chocolate or strawberry ice cream more how can you decide which parent to love more or whatever. anyway thats just my onion and im not a professional or anything.

[altercourse]

hi let me know if this isnt allowed (feel free to just ignore this ask if it isnt) but itd be great if you could promo my new system faq/informational blog @ systeminformational ..!! thank you

hit them up folks

[smallblackdogajj]

The same reason I will not follow white discourse blogs because white people will slap the faces of our dead on their discourse blogs to push up their woke points as if police brutality and the detainment of latino people is something fun to argue about on the internet and their response is “No one wants to go through that all the time sometimes they just want a safe space” and in a way I get it, but we don’t get that sort of option, our reality doesn’t go away the moment we delete a sideblog with the url “sonictheanti” and stick our fingers in our ears

[altercourse]

hey just so you know the-forest-system is a known predator/rapist/necrophile , the callout blog's url is ' a-necessarycallout ' and theres a link in the description of the blog with all of the important posts about them.

thanks 4 letting me know i deleted the post

[thealmightysystem]

Relatable DID/OSDD Things

scared scared scared scared scared SCARED SCARED SCARED SCARED SCARED–

HAVE TO RUN AWAY WE HAVE TO RUN WE’RE NOT SAFE HERE WE HAVE TO RUN–

i literally could not care less

they’ll find us again, they’ll find us again, they’ll hunt us, they’ll hurt us, we can’t hide forever–

incredible feeling of doom and dread with no explanation

**makes a mistake** time to cut off all communication with everyone ever because i am only capable of hurting people

i feel fantastic! wait – nope, it’s gone

NIGHTMARES

**something completely irrelevant takes place** *TRIGGERED*

there is literally nothing wrong, why do i feel so terrified

You Did Something. You Fucking Did Something To Me. I Can’t Remember But I Know You Did. How Dare You Set Foot In Here

“you’re your own worst enemy” except it’s fucking true

can the children please stop screaming now it’s 3 AM. no i meant the children inside my head

did you hear that?? DID YOU HEAR THAT

please don’t raise your voice god please i’ms os orry i’m s rory p ease don t hur tm e i did nt me anit l ltike th a t

T a i n t e d 

**someone asks a question** **everyone has to fucking answer**

“wow you’re such a strong person” no. i’m not. i’m fucking weak. i literally crumbled mentally from what happened to me. go fuck yourself.

wanting to touch and be touched but at the same time being touched is terrifying and makes you vomit in your mouth

“hey you wanna cuddle?” “actually nevermind i feel gross don’t touch me” “HEY YOU WANNA C–”

can’t sleep my head is too loud

Who am i? WHO AM I!? WHAT AM I WHO AM I WHO 

one completely random sound = Flashback Hell

wait you mean you don’t have 15 voices in your head constantly disagreeing with you??

is that pain? i can’t tell

it’s not working my coping methods aren’t working it’s not working IT’S NOT WORKING

“your experiences make up who you are” thanks, looks like i’m made up of the trauma and hell my abusers put me through.

am i hungry, anxious or need to pee, or all three

i showered yesterday. wait it was 4 days ago??

you kicked me from front for 3 days what the FUCK did you do

that’s not my name that’s not my name that’s not my name that’s not my name that’s not

i did that?? are you sure??? did i really do that??? did i really say that???

WHY CAN’T I FUCKING REMEMBER ANYTHING I CAN’T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT I DID TEN MINUTES AGO I CAN’T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT I WAS DOING RIGHT NOW HOW THE HELL DID I SURVIVE AT ALL THIS LONG

i’m alive? you mean i’m not dead? why do i feel like i’m decaying?

who is that

do you remember what you did? do you remember at all? do you even care? you don’t care. you just act like it never happened. 

I REMEMBER EVERYTHING.

why do i feel like it’s 2007 and i’m 12 years old

i literally was capable of doing this yesterday who the fuck forgot

am i fronting? am i co-fronting? am i real? is any of this real? are my alters even real? 

why do i feel like i’m f  a  d  i  n  g

i wish i knew what i was like if i didn’t have all this shit that fucked me up.

“you’re a survivor/fighter” don’t you dare ever fucking call me that again.

[fangirlinginleatherboots]

real talk but even ppl who know you real well might not notice when an alter is out unless explicitly told that the alter is out.

like when i transitioned to host, no one noticed. i behaved completely differently, became repulsed by contact, stopped doing activities the previous host did, changed my major in college, and started hanging out with different people and ppl just thought i was “going through a thing”

whenever karters out, people just comment that im “really funny today” or that im moody or something. theres a handful of people who can tell mine and karters typing and tone apart online and my therapist can tell theres a body language difference but thats only because shes looking for it

when alec is out people just say im being rude or moody or a smart ass. no one thinks anything of it and just steers clear because they assume im just pissy about something.

when kids are out we get comments like “why cant you just act your age” or “maybe you should lie down, you seem overwhelmed” but no one thinks like Oh A Dissociated Self State With The Emotional Awareness Of A Child Is Controlling This Person’s Body because thats just. not what people think.

idk don’t expect ppl tell alters apart without guidance. dont expect people to recognize you from another alter without help. and if you dont want to be outed or noticed, just don’t mention it, and people probably wont notice. obviously there are alters that people struggle to rationalize but ppl will go to great lengths to explain away odd behavior tbh don’t stress it.

edit: and im not saying ppl cant notice. lots of ppl CAN tell but not right away. its more just. have realistic expectations for ppl in your life.

[co-fronting]

Soulbonding? Did you mean

[kairos-system-deactivated201811]

Soulbonding, as we tried to explain in the server where it was being discussed, really isn’t “advanced kinning”. It’s a term that originated among writers who felt that their characters were coming to life and having their own thoughts and feelings. It then became used as a word in the endogenic plural community for having a bond with a fictional character who you could interact with.

@about-soulbonding

Being fiction/mediakin with a character is, dependent on interpretation, highly relating/feeling like the character or believing you were that character in a past/parallel life.

Please don’t make completely inaccurate posts when trying to raise awareness about what is and isn’t DID/OSDD.

[co-fronting]

oh honey, i know exactly what soulbonding is. it’s just complete bullshit and i made a meme about it because it’s funny lmao

[altercourse]

ooga booga

[kassasaurus-rex]

in tonight’s edition of very specific kinds of people i can’t fucking stand:

 men who drive fucking gigantic shiny pickups that they obviously just have as ego-boosters who fucking tailgate you on an empty stretch of freeway at night and they’ve replaced their headlights with fucking military-grade 500 proton scatter billion lumen searchlights that they fucking utterly blind you with while honking for you to get out of your lane because they just desperately have to go a full 40 miles over the speed limit or their dick will just jump clean off their balls and hurl itself out their window in shame

[an-alter-nate-dimension]

An Alternate Dimension!

Hello! This is the official promotion for our system server, An Alternate Dimension!

We are a very active and large server for anyone with DID or OSDD! If you’re looking for:

Friends

Support

Humor/jokes

System help

Bots that can tailor your alters into accounts

Specific channels for alters (protector channel, syskid channel, etc)

Then you’ve come to the right place! The link to the server is here, but make sure you read the rules and post an intro! You need an intro to join, and you can see the template to make it (though you don’t need to use it!)

The server is 16 and up, however if you’re only a month or less away from turning 16, that’s alright! We would strongly prefer if nobody over thirty joined as well, since there are people half that age in the server!

MAPS, MAP supporters, TERFS and non-traumagenic systems cannot join this server. This is a safe space for trauma survivors, and we don’t want any of that nonsense.