face challenges head-on

what have you got to lose?

[alyssa-irish]

challenges adolescents face in a gender and sexuality confused world

Challenge 1: Nosy relatives

It’s not entirely uncommon for our relatives to start getting antsy about the state of our love affairs once we enter young adulthood. This is even more so evident now that relationships among the young generation is becoming increasingly more common. Of course, we can’t necessarily blame them for being curious, however, it’s important for adolescents to be able to draw a line that prevents other people from intervening and meddling with their gender and sexuality. After all, it’s all in their power to determine which gender and sexuality they have. This also involves how one wants the world to view them as, evident in the way they wear clothes or the words they use when he speaks. No one should be forced to be someone they don’t want to be just because the relatives expect it from them.

Challenge 2: Gender confusion

A lot of terms have started to come up as more researches that center towards defining various gender and sexuality. And for most people, these terms can be a bit confusing and ambiguous if a thorough reading is not done on the subject. According to reading 10.2, there are four elements that make up gender, which are interrelated but are  independent of one another, are gender identity and expression, biological sex, and sexual and romantic attraction.

In this day and age, it’s easy to just go with the flow with what the people around you identify themselves with. It’s easier to become confused and get lost in the moment. Gender and sexuality isn’t exactly what you say you have, it comes after moments of introspection and deliberation. People shouldn’t identify with a gender just because it’s in, or to become popular. Adolescents should not let themselves be affected by the people around them in order to know what their gender and sexuality should be.

Challenge 3: Being ashamed of one’s gender and sexuality

Because of fear of rejection from one’s parents and sometimes peers, adolescents conceal their true identities behind facades and masks. They prefer to bottle their true selves inside, refusing to even let their parents know about how they truly feel. They don’t come out to their relatives for they don’t want to feel unwanted and receive inquisitive or pitying looks, worse be disowned just for expressing a gender and sexual orientation different from his biological sex.

However, suppressing one’s gender and sexuality may end up hurting the person. While it is not easy to come out as anything other than what was expected, finding other people that may be able to understand and sympathize with the situation can help a great deal.

[alyssa-irish]

millennial dating 101

A. Guide for Older People on Millennial Dating/Sexuality

1. Gender and sexuality pertain to a range full of possibilities. 

Gender and sexuality consist of spectrum that can vary from person to person. Essentially, this means that gender and sexuality are not bounded by limitations, instead, they offer an infinite number of possibilities. One can be born a female, identify herself as a female, and yet be attracted to women. To put things into perspective, sexuality, gender identity, and expression are not as simple as a “coffee or tea?” either-or type of questions; the answers generally differ within a specified range from ‘fine’ to ‘disastrous,’ more of like the answers when asked the question: “how’s the weather for today?” Simply, gender and sexuality are not defined; they continue to develop and change in a person’s lifetime depending on one’s culture, social class, and the environment he grew up in. Factors that may also influence one’s sexual orientation, gender expression and identity are gender norms, expectations, and roles.

2. Women are free to express their sexuality too. Stop shaming women for having multiple relationships, be it romantic or sexual. 

Ever since the beginning of time, women are restricted to being the homemaker, the caretaker, the parent responsible for providing love and care for their children. A long period of history has passed by since then and times are gradually changing. Gone were the times that only men can express their love for others. Gone were the days only men can knock on his beloved’s door, serenade, and sway the heart of person his own heart yearns for. Modern times also introduced a new kind of liberation among the generation of young people. Not only can women say whatever they want to, but women are also actually free to act upon what they actually wanted to do. Now, women can actually be breadwinners for their families. Along with female empowerment came the notion that women are also capable of doing things that men can. With this said, I think it’s about time for people to stop discriminating women because of the number of relationships she had, either it is sexual or romantic. For why is it that when men have a lot of sexual encounters, it’s an expression of masculinity and sexual prowess, but when women do the same thing, they become degraded versions of themselves?

3. Social media is the primary way of communication nowadays.

Technology has greatly affected us in a way that it changed the way we communicate for good. While handwritten letters sent via mail were the predominant way to deliver one’s messages of love for someone else, it sure isn’t the case nowadays. The younger generation utilizes social networking sites to communicate with one another efficiently and effectively. This doesn’t mean that handwritten love letters are superior to chats and text messages, it is only a matter of employing the usage of the resources most easily available to us.

B. Healthy Dating/Love/Sexuality for Millennial and Younger People

1. Be honest. Communication is the key to a successful relationship.

Speak up. Tell your significant other how you feel, what you think about things; don’t bottle things inside. Always keep in mind that he is not a mind-reader, he would not know what goes on in your mind if you won’t say anything. If you’re upset, tell him. Don’t make him guess, tell him upfront. 

(do not be like the person in blue)

Additionally, you should be able to feel at ease when talking about your opinions, feelings, and ideas without fear of being judged or ridiculed for them. You should not feel restrained or scared, moreover, you should be able to understand each other more through communication. It is a simple act yet of significant value. Relationships foster intimacy and individuality at the same time; don’t lose your voice in fear of expressing yourself just to satisfy your significant other.

2. Say ‘no’ if you start to feel uncomfortable.

This is in addition to my first tip. Sometimes, saying ‘no’ can be sometimes terrifying, for sometimes we are afraid of losing the love of our significant other. Now, extinguish that thought! If a relationship is built on mutual love and understanding, saying ‘no’ should not be hard. It should not make you feel regretful and it should not be used against you. Relationships last when built on steady foundations, that is, of healthy communication between identity-achieved individuals.

3. Consent is always important.

In relation to this, consent is always important. Remember, consenting once to an action doesn’t mean that consent is not needed for the consequent actions. One is in no proper position to give consent if he is drunk, stressed, passed out, not in the proper state of mind, or has mixed emotions. It is important to recognize when consent is given, and no, silence is not equal to yes. Respecting one’s answer (and non-answer i.e. silence) is important; don’t be a predator.

[alyssa-irish]

tad tips for teenagers in navigating the digital world

1: Be skeptical.

Take everything with a grain of salt. Don’t believe everything you see on the Internet. Learn to pick your sources for information, it must be credible, honest, and ethical. If possible, do a crosscheck. Information is invaluable if they are the truth.

2. Have a purpose and set a time limit.

The world of the Internet can be an interesting place, and you may find yourself aimlessly wandering the digital place about in hours! Set a goal and limit the time you spend on browsing the Internet. It helps you keep the focus on the tasks you’re supposed to accomplish. The Internet is such a great time-killer; too much time spent on websites (i.e. social networking sites) is too much time wasted. Learn to control yourself and manage a schedule. While it’s fun to have a digital image for others to see, learn to embrace and remember the real you living behind the screen as well.

3. Be responsible for your information.

Not all people in the digital world are nice and genuine; some people try to steal others’ information for their gain. Learn to distinguish people who are trustworthy and who are not. Refrain from posting any sensitive information that can be used against you in the slightest on the Internet. Posting occasionally on social networking sites is fine, overdoing it, however, is not fine.

4. Filter the content you see.

The Internet can be an amazing place full of fun and wonder, that is, if you know to look at the right place. Take advantage of the customizability of the Internet; foster your interests and make room for growth and improvement. Find hobbies that are to your liking and develop them. You like Harry Potter? Look up fan-arts and follow blogs that share Harry Potter content. Who knows, you might meet friends you will keep for your whole life! You want to learn how to play Ed Sheeran’s Perfect on guitar? Look it up on Youtube! Point is, almost everything is at the tip of your fingertips! Wield that power responsibly.

On the other side of the same spectrum, learn to unfollow posts and block people that bring you discomfort. You don’t need posts that provoke self-comparison and promote body hate. Each and every one of us is different and that’s not bad.

5. Be genuine in interactions and use nice words.

It doesn’t hurt anybody to just scroll past a post that is not to their liking. There are human beings on the other side of the screen too, and they get hurt as well when offensive comments are thrown onto the works they had decided to share with the world. Don’t be the cloud to someone’s sunny day. Everyone is going through a hard time; everyone uses the Internet to escape the reality for a bit. Perhaps, the world could be a little brighter and less lonely if we know how to say nice things rather than snarky comments?

[alyssa-irish]

being different from your parents isn’t necessarily a bad thing

Being an only child until I was ten years old, I became dependent on my parents and their opinions for a long while. I have always regarded them as people belonging to a higher level than me, I put them on a pedestal that I know I won’t be able to measure up to--they’re my parents, I guess that’s only natural. I viewed them as people who know everything, my Father with the mathematics department and politics, and my Mother with the technology aspect and household chores. I looked up to them. This was how it was when I was still in grade school. Their ideologies, values, and beliefs were simply reflected in me.

As I entered high school, that’s when things started to change. I slowly stopped looking at my parents that way and instead began seeing people whom I can share my thoughts and insights to. This hadn’t happened overnight, it went about as a gradual change as I slowly let go of the ideologies that were simply a reflection of theirs on me. Just like in superheroes, it felt like the masks that hid their faces came undone, and now I am able to see the faces underneath. I realized that despite everything they have managed to do for our family, they are still human beings through and through--prone to mistakes just like the rest of us. I began to treat them as my other set of best friends; I can almost never keep a thing from them. I always tell them what happened to my day, and in a way, they started talking about theirs to me. Since gaining a little brother, I learned to slowly stand on my two own feet and took charge of the house duties, and in a way, I learned how to think for myself. I started to think of the word responsibility and view their acknowledgment as something I must gain. I remember even refusing my mother’s help when she asked me to cook some dish since I wanted to make her proud with my cooking.

Sometime later, however, I became a bit too assertive and confident that I believed that I was right in our arguments. This happened a lot of times, my slowly changing and drifting away from what they deemed was right seem to upset them and it hurts because they’re my parents, I love them, but I also know that I can’t be like what they expect of me--a carbon copy. While they may say that my self-assertion has come from being with a “not-so-good” circle of friends, I told them that no, it’s not about them, this is about me. I guess it’s not right to think that I would always be following blindly in their footsteps. For example, I became a supporter for the LGBTQ+ community, something they could not comprehend (since they tolerate the community at best) and thought I was not seeing things clearly. But no, I told them I know what I am saying and that it’s fine if we do believe in different things--we’ll always be a family. Even now, we still have slight differences in our opinions of politicians (but since politics is a very sensitive topic I guess this is bound to happen).

That is not to say that I have left all of my childhood values and beliefs behind. I respect my parents and their words would always mean significantly to me. Now that I am in college, we learned how to set aside our differences and accept each other as the way we are. Of course, things are bound to change and they know that. Despite the drastic change in my schedule, we still manage to eat dinners together and maintain the open communication I had with them since I was twelve. I believe this helped me become a more open individual in summation, to never judge other people just for one incident, and to always think logically and critically with each decision I come upon. I can be trusted with secrets, no matter how big and small, and yet I can’t seem to keep any of my own secrets from them.

Now, when I get home from the university and see my parents as they greet me along the doorway, I don’t only see my parents, I see people I can trust both my secrets and life with--I see my best friends. I know that despite our differences, we are still a family.

Individuation is such an interesting concept, and if I were to put it in other words, I guess it would be like riding a bike. No one starts off being good with riding one; you need someone’s help to balance the bicycle for you first before slowly learning to pedal by yourself. In this context, parents would certainly teach the child everything they know about riding a bike--how to use the breaks, how to pedal, how to balance one’s self--to ensure the child’s safety. But in the end, it is out of their hands how the child is to learn how to actually ride the bicycle, it is for the discovery of the child himself.

The most practical tip I could give to younger people is for them to not be afraid of deviating from the ideals of their parents. It’s only natural to be different; being one doesn’t necessarily make a bad person. Being independent and assertive doesn’t equate to disrespect to and forgetting one’s heritage. Also, it’s important to not be afraid to speak up. Our parents are also human beings, so if an adolescent won’t speak up, parents, in turn, won’t know what’s concerning and bothering him.

As for the parents, I think it’s important to not pressure their child into becoming someone he isn’t. Not only this is stifling and suffocating, but it also makes the child feel unwanted and unloved since he can’t be someone his parents expect him to be. Open communication is vital. Supporting their child’s passions and dreams is also an important step to helping an adolescent reach his maximum potential. It always feels good to be validated, to know that someone appreciates the hard work and efforts you are exerting. Also, parents need to be constantly reminded that times are changing. The context in which they lived is different from the context in which we live in right now. Undoubtedly, a lot of things have changed since then, magnified by the rapid growth in technology and information literacy. These changes altered how people in my generation are expected to function in this society and it is significant for the parents to remember that

[alyssa-irish]

where I am at this point in my life

To say that I have already established my identity is a big oversimplification. I’m nineteen years of age, which is what I would call the last of my teenage years, and yet I am still in the midst of figuring out who I really am. This is especially true now that I am in college, a new territory suitable for trying out a lot of new things I haven’t been able to try before. I am now in the process of discovering new interests, pursuing old hobbies and talents, listening to other people about their various ideals, worldviews, and such, and essentially deciding who to spend the rest of my free time with. To put it simply, I am in moratorium. I explore all the options and opportunities available to me. I am now open to new experiences that come with being in college. I am learning slowly to become independent, to not rely too much on others’ opinions, and to go after the things I really want.

In terms of Erikson’s psychosocial stages, I am in the adolescence stage. I am still actively searching for my identity and sense of self. I am in the middle of processing and finding out exactly who I am in this world. I explore the possibilities presented to me and I forge a path in line with these explorations I am making. Undoubtedly, I still fear anxious at times—who wouldn’t be if one is treading on still but unfamiliar waters? However, I don’t let myself be eaten out by the fear I have with me—nothing will happen if I stayed still and stop completely. To be honest, moving forward despite my brain repeatedly telling me ‘no’ and ‘what if you fail and embarrass yourself’ is not easy, but with small but sure steps, I am able to slowly push myself forward to be who I wanted to be in the near future.

In terms of Freud’s psychosexual stages, I believe I am way past the oral, anal, and phallic stages. Although I may have been an adolescent for years now, I also believe that I am still in the latency stage somehow. Right now, I am more focused on the new tasks that come with being in tertiary education and acquiring new knowledge to further my growth towards becoming a health professional. Also, I spend the rest of my time with friends and block mates and I am not particularly looking for a relationship with someone just yet.

As an emerging adult, I constantly find myself at a loss between who do I want to be and who am I supposed to be. While I do know that what I have chosen for my course is what I essentially want to do for the rest of my life, I sometimes stop to wonder and ask myself, if ‘this is really the right path for me’. Nothing’s certain at this point of my life. Everything keeps on changing, everyone is moving, and if I don’t move, I would be left behind. Discovering one’s identity is the main purpose at this stage of life, however, it is not as easy as saying it for what it is. It is not an ‘aha!’ moment when you’ve finally understood a math problem you’ve spent hours working on, it is more like finding a needle in a pile of hay! What I find the most difficult at this stage of life is its vagueness and uncertainty. There are no rules to follow for you to be able to find your identity successfully. No points to track to know if you’re doing something wrong. I know that finding and forging one’s identity is different for everyone, I just hope I am doing the right one for me.

When I reach adulthood, I hope to have found my identity. I hope to be someone who’s independent and confident in her own skin, someone who’s sure of her decisions and wastes no time to grab opportunities she sees that would further her growth not only as a health professional but also as a person. I would have become someone rational enough to make decisions and decisive enough to know when to stop and to say ‘no.' Of course, I aspire to have been financially independent by then and essentially happy with the life I have with the people I love. 

At this point in my life, I am walking on a path with a lot of crossroads ahead of me. Though I may have a destination in my mind, it is not fixed. The end goal may change as I make decisions along the way (i.e. choosing which road to take) as it should but it won’t matter much. What matters most is that I’ll get there eventually, grateful for the small and big things that happened along the way, and when I do, I sure hope I won’t have any regrets of the journey I’ve had.

Picture used:

https://www.vecteezy.com/vector-art/70107-crossroads-sign

[alyssa-irish]

Why heroes fight

On September 22, 2018, without really knowing what I was getting myself into, I had the chance to watch Goyo: Ang Batang Heneral. It was the much-anticipated sequel to Heneral Luna, which aired in 2015. The film depicted the events and happenings during a dark period in the history of the country, the Philippine-American war, and centered on General Gregorio “Goyo” del Pilar, a young general that valiantly fought and lost at the Battle of Tirad Pass.

The film is tragic in a way that it was brutal in delivering the reality of the situation back then. The truth was served in a platter, no sugar-coats and all. However, I think it worked out for the best. Being sheltered from the truth from so long could cause ignorant members of the society. This film showed that despite being heroes, they are first and foremost human beings as well, prone to making mistakes as the rest of us. What makes them special is that they were able to make their loob whole in times of crisis, make a resolve and stand to fight, through the strength of their will, up to their utmost capabilities (pagbubuo ng loob sa oras ng krisis, paninindigan na lumaban, sa pamamagitan ng lakas ng kanilang loob, hanggang sa abot ng kanilang makakaya).

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Which of the three will win?

My first scenario wherein my id, ego, and superego went into disagreement was when I had a lot of school works to do. I was conflicted; I wasn’t sure if I should start doing the papers I had due for that week or just continue on playing games until the last minute. Regrettably, my id won out and I was stuck doing work late into the night.

My second scenario was when my mom got free concert tickets. I was not supposed to have any problems with it then, if only I don’t have an 8 AM engagement the next day and I was actually planning to catch up on sleep that specific night. In the end, I considered the situation and chose to side with my ego. It was the first time to watch a concert and I just decided to steal some z’s in between breaks. It was a decision I did not regret. I had a blast even if the sleep I got weren’t enough (which I inevitably got when I got home). 

Which of the three often wins?

Oftentimes I find myself being lost as to what to do when a situation arises that makes me think about which decision should be done and followed at the moment. Each decision has its own pros and cons, and sometimes, I find myself negotiating, bargaining, and compromising just to be able to get the best of both worlds. Of course, that wasn't always the case. I sometimes opt to choose to have fun than do any more school work, and there are other times where I don't even want to show my face to any of my friends.

According to Freud's structural model, the structure of the mind consists of three major systems: the id which follows the pleasure principle, the ego which follows the reality principle, and the superego which follows the morality principle.  These three contribute to aiding an individual conduct daily interactions with his environment.  

Now that I think about it, with the additional knowledge I got from Freud, I am sure that my ego certainly has the upper hand when it comes to the decisions I do in my everyday life. I don't want to miss out on anything so I always choose to compromise between the two choices. However, I also think that my id, ego, and superego have a harmonious relationship, as depicted in the below picture.

Although, there are times when my id is stronger than either my ego and superego. It happens whenever I don't want to do something school-related; id takes over and makes me procrastinate and play games all day long. Or sometimes I would watch movies or read novels that have got nothing to do with school.  To resolve this, proper time management and proper scheduling of tasks would suffice. I also need to make my superego stronger by reminding myself each and every time how important it is for me to study well in order to accomplish my goal of finishing my degree.  

[alyssa-irish]

Infographic of Positive Emotion: Fiero

Fiero is the feeling of satisfaction or pleasure at one’s achievements. It is a very satisfying feeling to have. It makes me feel like I can take on any challenge available in the world and come out of it very much alive and unscathed even. It makes me believe that I am competent in what I do. Fiero makes me become more brave and adventurous in how I live my everyday life. 

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Infographic of Negative Emotion: Anxiety

Anxiety is the feeling one experiences when he is uncertain of what will happen in the future. Anxiety is a terrible feeling to have. It makes me overthink. It makes me believe that I don’t have what it takes to be the best and to be at the top. It allows me to experience a variety of negative emotions that is not healthy for an individual. Being anxious never helped me in anything; it made sure to intensify the nervousness I feel and make me want to cry.

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Something Deeper Than What You Just See

How would one even begin to understand a complexity that is a person?

I am a Filipino with a Chinese blood mixed in, though, you won’t really see it just by looking at my face. I grew up in a humble home with loving parents and a cute yet endearing annoying little brother. Looking from afar, I may seem like a simple young woman who loves cats, animals in general, and wearing pants a lot more. I stutter a lot when speaking in front of a crowd and I laugh nervously whenever I see myself in a dire situation. I may seem like a typical face you pass by on the streets, but I am not.

I am much more, so much more than what meets the eye.

You see, I am who I am today because of heterogeneity, an unbalanced mixture of experiences, influences, and impressions. I am a complex person and one word wouldn’t be enough to describe me. There is something deeper inside that no one would ever get to know just by simply looking at me. I simply pertain to the hybrid identities I have. One would never be able to guess that I simply adore the Filipino dishes and that I wish to be able to speak the Filipino language way more fluently than I do right now.

Let’s start off with the qualities that are naturally in me, which we use term ‘loob’ for.

I love to read. I can’t even remember the time it started. All that I know is that I am always so excited to go to the National Bookstore and start roaming down the aisles to read something that fancies my attention. Reading has always been a favorite hobby of mine; you take it and you take away the very soul of my being. This, I believe, is the reason I developed a global perspective. It helped me become a better person by living the lives of various authors and learn what it is that makes such heroes and heroines so respectable and admirable. It made me gain a lot of knowledge that I would never have had access to if I weren’t reading.

Of course, through reading, I am also able to learn something new, which incredibly fascinates me. Being a curious fella made me realize that there are a lot of various things in the world to appreciate and be thankful for. It helped me become a person who is incredibly grateful to experience different cultures, meet people of different backgrounds and stories, and hear a variety of languages through the music I listen to. I learned not to be discriminatory; I see the beauty of everyone regardless of the color of their skin and the language they speak.

Even though I say that the customs we have as a Filipino are outdated and that I am heavily influenced by a lot of other global customs and beliefs, I can’t deny that I still imbibe them within me. Growing up in a strict yet loving Filipino household made me realize how blessed I am to grow within such a community. The Filipinos are so compassionate, endearing, supportive, amicable, and resilient. These are traits which I believe I have also acquired. And while there are also a lot of negative traits tied to being a Filipino, nevertheless, I am still glad to be one.

There are also qualities that people could know from someone with just a first glance. I must say that these qualities are, most of the time, superficial or only exist on the surface--therefore gaining the term ‘labas’. These traits are often taken for granted because they are where our preconceived notions and prejudices come from.

I may seem to have taken a liking to foreign films, music, and culture in general. I fancy everything that I do not consider my ‘own’ culture, however, that’s it. I don’t really see myself as someone who belongs to that culture since I have something which I could call my own. You might see me listening to K-pop or Vocaloid songs most often that not, but what is inside my heart will always be the music made by the Filipinos I listened to while growing up. What I mean to say is that I love the Filipino culture, my own culture, no matter how enamored I am may seem when talking about others’.

I also almost always use English when communicating with other people, especially with the friends I have made abroad due to similar hobbies and interests. However, I also always use our own language when talking to my family, relatives, friends, and acquaintances. Truthfully, I really wanted to be proficient enough in using the English language to help me thrive in a global community. But thinking deeper about it, I realized that what good am I if I am not even able to communicate in my own language, the language I grew up with? So, I have my reasons for wanting to use the English language, but I also believe that it’s better if we use the Filipino language as a nation and see where it might lead us.

These traits don’t even begin to explain how I am the way I am today. There are a lot more other reasons, or words for that matter, that factor into the equation that what makes me, me. However, what we need to remember is that there is more to someone than meets the eye. People are a lot more than what you just see. Finding the time to invest in someone to get to know them better reveals the beauty that no words could ever begin to describe.

[alyssa-irish]

My Janus-Faced Hybrid Identities

As the saying goes, “there’s always two sides to a coin.” The same concept can be applied to my hybrid identities: it has both positive and negative implications.

Onto the positive implications, I think my hybrid identities helps me become more prepared to interact with different people across the globe. With English as the language mainly used in communicating, it’s easier for me to make connections and friendships with people all over the world. It can help me thrive and be globally competitive. With my fondness of the foreign music, cuisine, and the films, my knowledge on different cultures expands. With this comes my interest in the other aspects of that culture as well. This helps me become unbiased, unprejudiced, and non-discriminatory, which in turn, allows me to become a more-rounded and sincere person when socializing with other people. Living in a technology-heavy world means I have all the access to any information I wanted with just a click of my finger. Whether I am inside my room or riding a bus to school, through the Internet, a lot of information can be obtained. If used wisely, it helps my general knowledge of the world expands. Not only that, I also grow as a person as I incorporate the values I have learned and believed to be parallel to the beliefs that I have. I’d like to think my creativity is also enhanced since I am influenced by a lot of different principles and techniques being used globally. I will then find my own ‘flavor’ as to how I’d like things to be done.

While there are a lot of positive implications, my hybrid identities affect me negatively as well. First off, there’s the sense of detachment with local beliefs. Since I am more exposed to the global norms and the various ideologies scattered all over the internet, I am growing more and more disconnected from the customs I have as a Filipino. I sometimes think that the values we have are old-fashioned and that it would be better if we just let them rest in the past as well. Sometimes, I also get confused when the beliefs I have seem to clash with those of my parents’ and grandparents’. This may have been due to the fact that I have been influenced by what I read from foreign articles and websites that I am slowly starting to change my beliefs to fit the more global perspective. I may have been becoming more liberal and vocal about my ideas, even though these ideas seem to repulse the older generations quite well (supporting LGBT rights, for example). With rampant globalization also comes the colonial mentality. I believe that as long as Filipinos are not deeply rooted in their Filipino origins, colonial mentality will continue to persist in our country. We have foreign films, series, books, and music dominating our country. It isn’t hard to see why people will prefer the foreign products more against local ones. With this problem arises another one, since I always find myself disappointed with the happenings in our country, I grew detached and disinterested. I now tend to skip over local news and would probably wouldn’t mind what happens to the government, or to the new situation in EDSA, etc. Although I still follow the news regarding the human abuses, trafficking and oppression happenings.

Through the words always uttered by numerous people, I will conclude this by saying: You really can’t have it all. There’s always a drawback to every situation, it seems that having hybrid identities is no exception to the rule.

[alyssa-irish]

Hybrid Identities

Sometimes, I tend to wonder, what would the world be like if all the inhabitants of the Earth have the same culture, language, system of writing, and we all live a single giant mass of land? I’d like to think living then would be peaceful and harmonious—just like a fairytale waiting to happen. I mean, who wouldn’t want a tranquil and united world? But looking at the way the world operates right now, with all the various cultures and diversity of languages, I believe that I would rather choose to live in this version of the world. Not just because it was the kind of world I was used to, but because for me, diversity is what makes the world a much happier place to live in. Through diversity, we learn a little bit more about others, at the same time improving ourselves just a little bit for the better. I mean, just imagine, if all people used to think the same things and do the same chores, wouldn’t that be such a dull and boring place to be?

I’d like to think of myself as a combination of various identities that are interwoven together, creating a product that can either be called local or global since these qualities both exist at the same time inside of me. Various pictures, each portraying a quality that I possess, were collected and edited to match the structure of my face to make my own hybrid identity picture. The different eyes in my picture represent two things. The right eye (blue eye) pertains to how I learned to view things from different perspectives. What holds true for my culture won’t probably be the same for the other person’s culture. The left eye (brown eye) signifies my fondness for reading foreign series and watching foreign films, be it Korean, Japanese, American, or British. The ears correspond to my inclination to listen to music, whatever the language it may be sung in. I mentioned I enjoy watching foreign films, all the more so if the audio track that accompanies the movie is in its original language. The mouth refers to the languages I am able to converse in. Since I was a child, I learned to use English to speak formally. Now, I use this language to be able to make connections and friendships from all over the world. However, I have always loved the Filipino language. I even use ‘po’ and ‘opo’ even when using the English language because it was something I was used to doing. The mouth also covers the food I eat, which are also greatly influenced by cuisines from other places, which is not to say that I don’t like Filipino foods; I do. The forehead represents my mind, which has both local beliefs and global views. For example, I have respect for not only the elderly but for people in general, no matter the color of their skin.

The more we interact with people with different views and beliefs, the more we are able to gain perspective of how it feels to live outside the country we reside in. At the same time, our local identities are mainly influenced by the people who live around us and the culture that surrounds us. We don’t choose whether we are either local or global, it is not an either-or phrase, rather, it should be we are both local and global at the same time.

Pictures Used:

Forehead: Robe, Isabelle. (2018). Look for the occasion. Retrieved from http://lookfortheoccasion.com/about-us/.

Left Eye: Strong, Rebecca. (2011, September 20). How to play up Asian eyes. Retrieved from https://blog.beautybridge.com/beauty/how-to-play-up-asian-eyes-2.

Right Eye: Before and after – dark brown eyes. Retrieved from https://www.desiolens.com/beforeafter-dbrown.

Lips: Vanessa Hudgens cute eyes smiling face closeups. Retrieved from https://xdesktopwallpapers.com/vanessa-hudgens-cute-eyes-smiling-face-closeups-6343.php.

Nose: Ians. (2017, March 17). Why is the shape of your nose so different? No, it’s not genetics! Retrieved from https://indianexpress.com/article/lifestyle/life-style/shape-of-nose-is-so-different-no-its-not-genetics-4573357/.

[alyssa-irish]

My take on Bronfenbrenner's Bioecological Systems Theory of Development

What makes someone entirely unique amongst his peers?

When I was but a child, ever with a curious mind, I have always wondered why each and every one of us is distinct from one another. Why is he/she exactly like that? What made him/her that way? Are there a lot of factors that shape an individual to be exactly the way he/she is? And if so, how? I tried conjuring up a lot of reasons to answer the two prior questions: family history, a circle of friends, the way they act when under pressure, etc. Different answers came about when I was finished with my observations. Huh, so I thought, maybe that’s what makes everyone so vastly different from one another: the things around us and how we respond & interact with these things. With that, I am presenting the different systems I had grown up with that made the way I am today.

I am Alyssa Irish, a 19-year-old young female adult in the process of paving the way to reach my dreams. The microsystem pertains to the environment which contains the social circles I grew up having direct contact and relationships with, such as my immediate family, the schools I attended (Pasig Community School & Pasig City Science High School), and my different circles of friends. The mesosystem refers to interactions between my microsystems, which in a way affects how they socialize with me. Examples include the interactions between my teacher and parents and how my friend would communicate with my parents. The exosystem incorporates the community I grew up in, where certain implementation of policies affects my everyday life. I may not have direct contact with the people running the community, but they, in a way, impact how I choose to live my life every day. The same goes to the local government, while I may not be a part of it, the way it handles the city’s affairs influences every citizen living under their rule, which includes me. On to the next circle, my macrosystem consists of the Filipino culture and having Catholic beliefs. The Filipino culture taught me to be respectful of how I address the elderly and people superior to us. We use the terms ‘po’ and ‘opo’ to signify respect. I am God-fearing as well, having grown up with Catholic beliefs. The chronosystem deals with the changes that happened within me through time. I consider the day my little brother was born, 10 years later and a month after mine, to be a life-changing moment. It was when I learned the words responsibility and selflessness. Through the years, I slowly but surely and steadily matured as my body changes with my age. Living in an age where technology is all around and information can be easily accessed with a click of my finger, I have learned to critique the sources and articles I read from. I know not to trust easily and to always cross-check every knowledge I stumble across online.

After listing all these things, I finally realized the answer to the last two questions I have had since then. Yes, there are a lot of factors that build an individual’s character; all these factors affect an individual in a sole way that makes him different from other people. What kind of context he lives in and the way he responds back to the environment around him fashions him as well as he, in a way, helps in molding his surroundings. That is what makes everyone so entirely unique from each other.