A Man Like Him/Her

GFD | Bi | 18

[billiewena]

“spam rebloggers are annoying” no. spam rebloggers are my best friends. spam rebloggers brighten my darkest of days. spam rebloggers single-handedly keep me employed as a tumblerina.

[gay-irl]

gay_irl

[formlessdemi]

[alaija]

[i-have-too-much-time]

[forestfullofberries]

[ponyboyfaceshopping]

We need a strap emoji

[jinxremoving]

[bramst]

[slutyr]

i’m sorry to ruin the fun pals, but you can’t actually swallow the artificial cum that’s used for squirting strap ons. you will in fact shit your pants.

here, my friends, are a few suggested alternatives

cream of coconut

flavored lubes

sweeten condensed milk mixed with water

if you do this make sure your toy has a hose system, not a internal one that you have to squeeze the dildo itself to operate. this will make it easier to clean

and lastly as a general rule for flavored sex products

if you can eat it, it cannot go in any orifice but your mouth.

if it is made for your ass don’t drink it. if it is made for your mouth don’t put it in your ass, please

[poltergirlst]

b-but… but the proof of my love for you is pegging you, dear :(

[strawberrystepmom-deactivated20]

[spicyzsk-deactivated20181203]

[lonely-gfd-cutie]

Being shy doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Being insecure doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Being uncomfortable with inflicting pain doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Not liking leather and chains and such doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Not liking humiliating your sub doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Being uncomfortable verbally degrading someone doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Being uncomfortable with findom doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Not wanting to be called mistress or master or miss or mommy doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Not liking chastity or pegging or body worship doesn’t make you a bad domme.

Being a domme is being yourself, and your not a bad domme for being yourself.

[notlikeyoudactuallymissme-deact]

Her vibrator is your teammate not your enemy

[panphobicproinsias]

You lot see a woman dating a camp or "effeminate" man and go "haha does she know she's a beard" as if bi men don't exist and don't have cause to subvert gender norms/have a complicated relationship with masculinity, regardless of who they're dating.

[incidentally-its-nonsense]

There’s also this implication that these women who date “effeminate” men can’t be genuinely attracted to them and are naive and oblivious towards their effeminacy. It a complete refusal to acknowledge that not only do gnc bi men exist, but women can be and are actually attracted to them. There doesn’t have to be settling or smoke screens in the relationship for it to work.

[lucarioguy15]

The "opposite" is also true! You see men dating "masculine" or butch women and people be like "lmao we know who wears the pants in that relationship" like Let women date "feminine" men and let men date "masculine" women. It's none of your business. Leave them alone. No one's lying to anyone.

[panphobicproinsias]

Both of the points are so *chef kiss* perfecto. Thank you!

[puttingherinhistory]

Also straight people absolutely can be gender non-conforming. We really need to normalize that gender non-conformity isn’t just for same gender attracted people, nobody of any sexuality has to adhere to any gender norms. Gender non-conformity is for everybody.

Sexuality and gender expression are two separate things.

[sunflower-cane]

Some tips for spoonies who have sex questions but cant talk about them

If your hips dislocate often, being on top might be better, or reverse cowgirl. I found that position in particular works for me. Thigh grinding and clit stimulation tend to be less energy than actual intercourse if you have a vagina.

If youre into any bondage and have EDS/any tissue disease please dont use duct tape its hell on earth for the skin. Try the fuzzy handcuffs or ribbons, silky fabrics can be just as much fun and less pain than sticky or rough textures

Yes being hypersexual is normal if you have chronic pain or chronic fatigue as its normal human response to get out of pain and into pleasure, it alsp can push an adrenaline rush and give sudden energy.

Yes being sex repulsed is natural if you have chronic pain/fatigue because sex can be exhausting, and more painful. And even if it feels good, it can be really bad afterwards going from pleasure to pain.

Dislocation or pulled muscles are common, heat or a bath afterwards can be really helpful.

Dont forget to pee after sex its like ten times as likely for people with low immune systems to get utis than healthy people.

If youre into anal and are likely to have prolapses please be super careful and start training yourself beforehand, and be slow about it.

If your skin is stretchy or tears easily please because during intercourse and especially nipple play.

If you have devices/tubes on you/in you be sure not to put a whole lot of pressure on them. Stop if somethibg doesnt feel right. If you do bondage make sure your tube doesnt get tied up with you.

Being sex repulsed and hypersexual us really normal especially if youre on medications.

Yes, anti depressants, painkillers and especially anti psychotics can make it nearly impossible to orgasm. Dont feel guilty about it, its just how it is. Lots of foreplay and edging can help but for many it takes getting off the med to get your sex life back/achieve orgasm.

Back spasms can and will happen! For regardless of sex/gender, if you orgasm, your muscles get tight and excited and it can cause spasms in the legs and especially your back! Be careful.

If you have a vagina and have any tissue disease, its usually easily to tear tissue in both the anus and the vagina, make sure you are lube up as much as possible before any insertion. And if tearing still happens make a note of it and talk to your doctor if it doesnt heal.

If you bruise easily, youll get hickeys easily, and if you heal slow those motherfuckers do too.

Its fun when youre flexible, but make sure youre not hyper extending during sex, because that could make you extra likely to have a dislocation.

Yes, jaw dislocations while sucking dick are super common, lock jaw and jaw weakness are too. Dont be ashamed to stop. Its a lot of energy and a lot of work and movement your neck/jaw might not be used to. Ice packs work best after a long day of suckin dick.

Premature ejaculation is also common for a lot of spoonies (especially spoonies with penises) due to the sudden rush of adrenaline/pleassure and extreme sensitivity. Dont be ashamed!

Yes, your meds can make it hard to.maintain na erection, talk to your doctor about what to do, but dont be ashamed, its super common especially on anti depressants.

Its common for people with chronic illnesses to have a hard time staying wet/maintaining an erection during sex as youre basically battling both fatigue and pain, try foreplay and other things outside of penetration before going straight for intercourse.

No ones gonna tell you this but people with inflammatory dieases, your vagina will inflame during penetration, it may hurt, you may not feel it, thats why you should start slow.

If you have unique allergies please please for the love of god make sure you dont have a latex allergy or an allergy ro certain lubricates, condoms can be the worst for those of us with bad immune systems/unique allergies.

Be prepared for wrist and shoulder dislocations during handjobs/fingering.

Theyre not gonna yell you this but fingering and handjob can advance your arthritis/give you early arthritis. Please take breaks when you feel pain.

All i have for now. Will be adding more.

[zandel645]

I’d like to add some helpful tips for those into kink/BDSM!

Use bondage tape, for the love of god, it will save your skin. It’s not too expensive and it only sticks to itself, it doesn’t pull at your skin when its removed (it even works with hair!)

If you’re giving a handjob and you feel your wrist subluxing or dislocating, switch it to blowjob instead. Same goes for the other way round too and it makes things more interesting.

If you’re taking part in hitting or spanking, then stay away from joint areas, lower organs, and places with prominent bone. Avoid the jaw as much as possible.

Speaking of jaws, it’s okay to take breaks from wearing mouth or ball gags, if you feel like it’s going to dislocate or its painful in a bad way then get another gag with a smaller sized ball instead.

After a pretty intense session maybe with a fair bit of intentional pain, it’s common to feel faint or dizzy cos it puts the body through a lot. Be careful when sitting or getting to stand up, the drop in blood pressure may cause collapses or fainting, take it easy and get your partner to help you up

[artichokedoesnttrustyou]

I know the list talks about allergies but people don’t really think about sensitive skin. It’s not severe as an allergy, but you’re gonna wish you didn’t put it on.

I’m telling you right now. If you have sensitive skin you can not put “just any kind” of lube on your parts. 😭 

I do a taste test (no, I’m not saying eat the lube, it’s not soup) by putting just a pea size on my finger and licking it. If it tingles your tastebuds you don’t want it on you.

[diekingdomcome]

For lube I found PROMESCENT it’s made with organic aloe. Haven’t had any adverse side effects or reactions when using it.

Does anyone have any tips and suggestions for people with fibromyalgia whose bones, muscles, joints, and nerves throughout their body hurt them like all the time 😭. But also who kinda likes pain 😭.

Gonna use my own experiences for sleeping and say putting a pillow underneath your stomach, back, when you’re on your side. Hard surfaces are not fun they make you hurty more ☹️. Putting pillows underneath your knees when you’re giving head helps a ton, or doing any floor play. If you do end up on the floor or a hard surface spread out a blanket and or comforter to give your body some cushion.

For someone whose shoulders and wrists dislocates be careful if you’re in doggy and your partner wants to and tries to put your arms behind your back. Or if you’re in any position where your part partners tries to extend your arms or wants to lock your wrists. I’ve also noticed my shoulders get more dislocatey and limp if I’m laying on my side ☹️.

Also also also. Being a spoonie and chronically ill means sometimes you’ll forget that you can’t do certain things without causing further harm to yourself. while you’re doing the certain things that cause harm 😭. Especially when you’re in a real lusty kinda mood.

for someone with fibromyalgia I get brain fog so do be careful when setting boundaries with your partners. Your well-being has to kinda be in someone else’s hand. That they’re just going to have study your body language and advocate for you. Bc you can become a literal ghost and dissociate hard 🙃.

Also, haven’t seen anyone talk about hydration. We’re more likely to be fatigued and cramp than most able bodied people. Before, during, and after. Keep Pedialyte handy. And other electrolyte replacements. Water probably won’t be enough.

As a spoonie I’ve noticed that my body basically picks and chooses what I have stamina for especially depending on the day ☹️. And sometimes it picks and chooses what’s going to hurt me today 🙃.

It’s all about advocating for yourself the best way you can, setting boundaries and finding partners who understand your unique adversities who wanna make sexual intimacy a fun an enjoyable experience for you both.

[pleasechokemedaddy2]

I thoroughly believe men should be loved the way women are expected to be loved. Shampoo his hair for him in the shower and rinse it out for him. Pull him to your chest and play with his hair when he’s feeling sad or sleepy. Take him out to dinner and pay for his meal. Bring him little surprise gifts. Kiss his forehead and temple when you see him. Let him be the little spoon and hold onto him like he’s everything to you. Be obsessed with him, treat him with all the love you expect to be treated with.

[hercales-plutus]

Mutual love and respect for each other.

[veryfunnymemes]

[bitchezbebonkers-deactivated202]

PLEASE AS A NURSE IM BEGGING YOU ALL PLEASE 

[juicy-baphobastard]

PLEASE ITS FUCKING IMPORTANT

[bubblegumdomme]

This. As a fucking nurse, I’m telling you to just go. As a person who cares, also telling you to just go.

[pinchblog]

Sex tip: If he’s pressuring you to do anal, buy a dildo the same size as his dick, and ask him to do it first. If he’s scared of the pain- case closed. There’s absolutely no reason that he should expect it to feel any differently for you. If he says that it would be emasculating, belittling or ‘gay’, then that man is a misogynistic homophobe, and you better run for the hills as fast as your legs can take you.

[nosoulforsale-deactivated201502]

I’m screaming

[theaztecthrasher]

Take it like a man

[freedoritos-deactivated20160716]

What if he says yes

[officialbucknasty]

then you start making memories

[stark-raven-mad]

[ry-dgaf-deactivated20211230]

We’re homophobic if we don’t wanna take a dildo in the ass now? 🥴

[iridessence]

You’re homophobic if you say it’s “gay, belittling or emasculating” to receive anal. And you’re misogynist/a shitty person if you have to use pressure to get your partner to do it, but you don’t want to do it yourself because you’re afraid of the pain. Don’t ask anyone else to go through what you’d consider painful for your pleasure if they’re not into it and don’t use pressure.

[ruffboi-mags]

And like, actual decent men may, because of the way our society is set up, need that object lesson.

If you present the dildo to him and say “you first” and he says “eeeeh, I don’t really want to?” you can say “Okay, that’s fine, I won’t force you, but I don’t really want to, either.  So don’t I deserve the same respect I’m giving you by not pressuring you into it?”

If he argues or says “it’s different” or makes excuses?  DUMP HIM.  he is not safe and you should move on.

If he says “oh, fuck, I didn’t think of it like that, it’s ok if you don’t want to we’ll do other things”, then he’s at least got basic decency and you can test him for more intensive limits at your leisure.

[lace-deactivated]

Ok but if he says “I’d actually really like to try that anyway” - he’s a keeper and you should instantly propose to that man

[whitepeopletwitter]

[shevibe]

Have you met Bumpher? This innovative ‘lil piece is a soft supple silicone cover for the base of a dildo to stimulate and protect the strap-on harness wearer. | Video credit Samantha Lewis @BananaPantsLife⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ #Bumpher #StrapOnPlay https://www.instagram.com/p/B09LNxehCWv/

[nymph0mancy-deactivated20250525]

MY TRANS ASS IS QUAKING