Today I’m quitting smoking. Quit laughing! I’m serious this time!
I had started stress smoking when I got my first job at nineteen and like most people at that age I was going out with my friends and co-workers, some of whom who also smoked, it became a social habit as well. Before I knew it every phone call, car drive, night out, stressful moment, social setting, or moment of boredom found me with a cigarette between my lips. I was hooked. Hooked bad.
Everyone knows the quitting methods. The patches, lozenges, and now-a-days we have prescription medications to help curb nicotine cravings. We all sat through the same talks with our teachers in primary school, right? I remember being horrified after those seminars at school and going home begging my parents to quit smoking.
“Cigarettes make you die, Mommy!” I remember telling her and bawling my eyes out.
Of course, my parents didn’t quit smoking. Years later Dad quit cold turkey when he got really into bodybuilding, but my mother has stubbornly held on to her Cowboy Killers to this day. This is where I petulantly say that I don’t want to be like my mother. It’s the truth, though. I don’t want that to be me. Let me tell you why.
I lost my Paw Paw to lung cancer that was caused by smoking cigarettes all his life. I was thirteen and I still miss him terribly. You would have thought that it would have been motivation enough for me to not even dream of picking up a cigarette. Yeah, I thought so too when he passed away. It stinks to be wrong on that subject. You know what’s even worse? I developed asthma in my twenties, and I continued to smoke!
I want to feel better and I want to be the very best version of myself that I can be. Part of that is giving up this habit of putting harmful stuff in my lungs and choosing other ways to cope with the every day stress of living. It’s a one day at a time process, but I am committed to it.
I’ve made several half-hearted attempts to quit smoking before. I can say that my heart wasn’t really in it for the long haul. I tried to quit smoking because I knew I should, but I didn’t really have that drive to quit that I needed. Well I can honestly tell you that I have that drive today, and moving forward, to quit smoking cigarettes.
A recent doctor’s visit found me walking out of the office with a few prescriptions to fill. One of which was my inhaler for my self-imposed asthma, and another was a low dose medication that helps curb nicotine cravings. How sad is it to say that I gave myself asthma and continued to abuse my body with cigarettes?
I began taking the medication eighteen days ago and have noticed a significant drop in my nicotine cravings but that urge to smoke was still there. I have smoked for so long that the hand to mouth gesture is second nature to me now. I was still smoking! How could I fix that? I’ve talked to friends who have successfully quit smoking, read a few blogs and articles with helpful tips and tricks on quitting smoking and even called that helpful quit line. All of these said the same and different things.
So, what did I decide to do about it? Well I’m now the owner of one of those nifty vape pens. Not one of those modified ones, they are a bit too hardcore for me. I know this because I’ve tried them before. I opted for a Juul device and got their starter pack of Juul pods with it to let me try four of their flavors. I’ve got to say they are kind of awesome! I’ve been using it since last night and this morning I woke up and told myself that I wasn’t going to have a cigarette today.
It’s bedtime now and I haven’t had even one. I must admit that my Juul is sitting right next to me as I type this, ready for me to grab it at a moment’s notice. We’ll see what tomorrow brings.
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