Hardy Har Harmerica

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Quite a sentence.

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This article headline bout to cost me a $2k trip to the ER

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I keep the two most toxic apps on my phone nearby for easy reference. #miserylikescompany

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Pete Davison was involved somehow, right?

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Literally me when I decide to become a robber

I’d probably have to start a tab tho

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The kind of shit you see on Facebook when you grew up on America’s schlong

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just like my will to like another Happy Birthday message

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Ukraine is so famous right now, I’m waiting for them to release a line of beauty products..

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At this point, get this man a tricycle

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Jen, we will take your flip phone videos any day of the week

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Ah, the old “trick the world with BAGGIER CLOTHES” schtick… I know it too well

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I did not consent for my photo to be taken

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I blame Kaley Cuoco

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Jen! You’re not supposed to swallow Colgate mouthwash!!!

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You can kneel on a ladder????

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Was hoping for “FETA” but this will have to do

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That’s a lot of paper towels