The more I live & learn the more I realize LOVE is the answer. It's what will solve so many of our problems if we just let it.
There have been a lot of things that have happened within my family lately that have made me really question who it is I thought I have been loving all these years. I walked away from the situation with my heart bruised & worn down due to my tendency to internalize the pain of those I love. I took a lot of what happened inside of me letting it affect my attitude. I was struggling for a while, letting my heart be weighed down by all the hurt happening around me. BUT I chose to turn to love & I have received so much love back! I've never cried so much in one week! It's not that I was feeling sad, but because I was feeling thankfulness, peace & joy for my ability to help my loved ones by simple acts of love.
Tonight at institute we talked about Alma 36 & the famous Chiasmus in the Book of Mormon. One of the teachers thoughts really stood out to me! He said that when he read the chiasmus he read it with the perception of a Father writing to a son with love in his writings and intentions. I'm not sure if the teacher was referring to Alma writing to his actual son, God writing to his son Alma and all his children, or both? But whatever way he meant it, it changed how I read that chapter.
I feel like everything that has happened really has brought me closer to my father, a man at one point in my life I feared. But now all I have is love, pure love for this man that I respect more than words can define. The thought of all he has done, for who he has been to me and so many others brings tears to my eyes.
A couple of Sundays ago we talked about about George Albert Smith and the 11 creeds he lived by in Relief Society. I was so inspired by his LOVE for mankind; haha are you catching the underlying theme in this post? By observing his life, he made loving those around him seem so easy. And maybe it is easy once you get things rollin'. I just remember being at the sink in the kitchen washing some dishes later that day thinking about all the hurtful things going on, getting so frustrated. But then reluctantly remembering Joseph F. Smiths creeds, hoping I had the courage & patience to live the same way.
I also feel so much love from my father in heaven when I'm at school. I'm a TA in Anatomy & I wonder sometimes in the midst of all the studying and teaching how someone could see the miracles of the human body and still not believe in a God. I went to a book review/discussion with the author Alan B. Rogers on his latest work "Evidence in Evolution", it was refreshing to see great men (a majority of the review/discussion was professors at the school) discussing the miracle of life with the acknowledgment or acceptance of a divine being at play. God loves us so much, he cared for us so much that he spent time to create the beautiful masterpieces that our spirits dwell in! Anatomy is a hard thing to study, and all I had to do was memorize the parts and the theories. I can't imagine coming up with all the pieces on my own!!!
I just pray to have love in my heart, so much that I can be forgiving when things get tough. I'm going to make an extra effort to make love a more permanent thing. I hope it won't be too hard, especially since the feeling is so addicting!
So here's to the love drug, and everything that comes with it! Now those are some side effects that I think I can handle ;)
Here's a link to the chiasmus and 11 creeds.
Chiasmus: http://www.cometozarahemla.org/mosiah/alma-36-chiasmus.html
11 Creeds: http://www.lds.org/liahona/1993/09/george-albert-smith-a-living-example-of-love?lang=eng&query=george+albert+smith+11+creeds
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