EXCUSE ME??????

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@amygdala-dan
EXCUSE ME??????
Me at work: i can't wait to go home and work on my projects i wanna go home and do my art lemme go i wanna do thingssss
Me at home: huoorghghh six hours of youtube videos
that’s true
#how long have we been holding on to this one?
I held onto this for six whole months. It was soooo hard waiting.
i think the reason why the assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the funniest political assassinations is for this very simple reason:
1 guy stabs 1 guy: not funny. that's murder.
2 guys stab 1 guy: even less funny. that's two against one.
60 guys stab 1 guy: uproariously funny. why do you need so many guys.
60 guys only manage to stab the 1 guy 23 times: I can't fucking breathe I'm laughing too hard, you suck at this
I'd like to think all 60 managed to get a stab in. Maybe just not into Caesar, though.
sorry for bitching and whining. unfortunately i have to or else ill start killing and eating people instead
this too shall pass
HURRY UP
i think you should be allowed to cite scholars who are bad people but only if you put the word (oof) or (yikes) after their name
like Parker (yikes, 1989) or Obbink (big oof, 2007)
Freud (derogatory, 1923)
#reminds me of the time a former grad student from my dept cited the unabomber in a math paper with the footnote ‘better known for other work‘ @sierpinskis-assket
A small but knowing Chappell 🌈🤡
no i don't want you to redirect me to your app i want to look at recipe
i am not going to a secondary location with you one of us dies here
you aren’t too old to transition btw
Life-changing OCD hack is learning that you can literally call poison control to check if you fucked up and took medications wrong in a way that could kill you instead of having a panic attack while reading reddit and quora threads for an hour. They won't even be mad at you. Like obviously don't do it every day or something but genuinely you can do this if you need to
as people turn more and more towards the internet as a first choice for information, poison control (which has rebranded as poison help? i think?) is seeing fewer and fewer callers
part of this is because the USAmerican birth rates have slowed, and the number 1 culprit for why you'd call poison control is kids under 5 put shit in their mouths all the time
but part of it is BECAUSE people are turning to the internet first
and you don't have to! poison control is FREE and available in EVERY US STATE AND TERRITORY
they are staffed 24/7 365 days a year! they do everything they can to minimize wait times and they have an ENORMOUS database of medications, household cleaners, chemicals, pesticides, and MORE! and not only information on JUST those things, but how they interact with other things! they can even give you advice on if your pet ingests something they shouldn't!
but poison control isn't federally funded! they're a frankenstein mishmash of state funded, federally funded, and a couple of other weird ones (like organizations helping with funding) just for flavor. poison control NEEDS you to be politically aware. keep a finger on local and state politics; if your state is voting to shut down their poison control center, make sure your reps hear about how pissed you are!
poison control saves lives, but even more than that, it keeps people out of emergency rooms and walk-ins when they don't have to be. when Louisiana closed its PCC in 1988, people who called the PCC hotline were instructed to call their local hospital instead. the number of medically-treated poisonings rose by 42%...meaning ERs and walk-ins were flooded with people who'd taken, say, one extra pill of ibuprofen by accident, or got a bit of rubbing alcohol in their mouth, or got their dog's flea medicine on their skin. stuff that was SCARY, sure...but wouldn't have needed medical care at all if there had just been someone to tell those people you can just wash your mouth out, or wash your skin, or refrain from taking any more ibuprofen for at least 24 hours!
anyway help ur local PCC, put the pressure on your political reps, and if you ever have questions like "hypothetically what would happen if you inhaled iodine," you can call 1 800 222 1222 and speak with a real live reassuring person any time day or night!
Also in terms of phone numbers that will save you a trip to the ER, in the US your insurance company and/or local hospital system probably have a 24/7 nurse hotline. (There are a couple of online ones but frankly I wouldn't trust that any chat version isn't a bot.) I have used them several times and they are always super nice and patient and never judgy. They will definitely err on the side of "you should probably go to the ER and have this checked out," but they have also given advice like "you will probably be fine to wait out the holiday weekend until urgent care is open again if you do this and this." And even if the answer is just "yes, go to the ER right now," sometimes they also add "and also make sure you tell them this and this and probably don't bring up this other thing it's not related and will just confuse them" which is also super useful.
Sign at a local pet store
These CREATURES are $22.99
hey if you’re a federal worker you may want to use a vpn and check to see if the “american accountability foundation” (elon) doxxed you. suggesting a vpn bc there’s an IP logger on the domain.
info includes black and white photos of targets, social media posts, and political donation history among other things. do not access the site from company devices or during work hours.
according to this NBC news article, “offenses” include things as minor as having your pronouns in your bio.