🌹| A/N : aw hi thank you, you're so sweet. like awwww ily I hope you'll enjoy what I have written <3 and I hope the tags will work on this one
And these turned out so long?? Oml
they took long enough too. Excuse my technological issues
🥀| Warning(s) : Stan's house doesn't make sense. I FORGOT HE MOVED OUT OF SOUTH PARK* BECAUSE OF TEGRIDY so just ignore that pls
*Edit : hah.
Stan ⋆ ˚｡⋆🎧˚
Hah. No
No genuinely, no.
Stan has tried putting off introducing you to his parents for the longest time.
In a perfect world he would have no problem with his parents meeting you and his only worry would be enduring some mild teasing from his sister. In a perfect world Randy wouldn't be his father.
But one day, it was still early as you two approached his house after a date. He was supposed to walk inside, quickly grab his coat and get back to you and walk you home.
Buuuut his dad saw him. Worse: he saw you.
That prompted Randy to go:
' Hey Stanley, why don't you bring your friend inside? '
And it's not as though Stan could just say 'no thx', his mom noticed you too, and naturally, she'd want to meet the person her son was dating.
So there you were, sitting next to Stan, who most definitely did not want to be here, at the dining room table, while his dad talked about his... Farm
That was until Stan's mom cleared her throat, giving her husband a quiet yet stern 'Randy', then turning toward you with a smile and asking:
' Right.. So, what was your name again, dear? ' :)
God bless this woman, she just wants to get to know the person making her son so happy
She asks all the typical questions, like how you met and how long you've been together. But she also takes an interest in you, your interests, school and anything else.
I also think Sharon would be very understanding if you were shy or nervous. She wouldn't comment on your stuttering.
Maybe she'd even note how she too was nervous meeting Randy's parents.
She's genuinely the most normal mom.
Stan may be a teenage boy, but he does actually care about his mom's opinion of you, so he's glad you're getting along.
Shelley didn't seem too hostile toward you either. She even refrained from bullying Stan too much! But that's only for the first meeting. Next time you come over, she'll just randomly drop the most embarrassing childhood fact about her brother.
And Randy... He.... Likes.. You....?
Hard to say.
By the time you're finished, it's gotten dark.
Randy offered to drive you both home, Stan politely said 'NO', and gently dragged you outside.
He draped his coat -the very same one he was supposed to simply grab and leave his house with- over your shoulders, as he walked you home.
' That... Sorry about that. I didn't plan for it to go that way.
... My.. Family is a bit... You know.
But.. They liked you. Really. My mom will definitely want you over again sometime. '
He chuckled. Silence falling between you, before he added:
' And.. I'm just glad you didn't, like, run off screaming the very first minute. '
You came to a stop as you two neared your house. He ran the back of his hand against your cheek, looking into your eyes- before his eyes darted onto the side and widened.
Randy was there. In his goddamn car. He even gave him a thumbs up.
That.. Dampened Stan's mood. But you gave him a kiss on his cheek, which had the same uplifting result as always.
He watched as you walked inside your house.
Randy told him to get into his car. But Stan turned on his heel.
He did not get in.
Kyle ⋆ ˚｡⋆📚˚
You. Meeting his parents. This was something Kyle has been planning for a longer while. Yes, before he told his parents about you, but even once he's told them about you, he was planning the meeting a solid week and a half before it happened.
Yes, everyone thinks their family is a little 'weird' and 'quirky'. But. Be for real. All families in South Park are like, a special kind of weird. And his was clearly no different.
... But you could never go wrong with a classic 'introducing your partner to your parents by inviting them to dinner with your family'.
At least you were pretty cooperative when Kyle presented the idea.
He did give you a warning about his mom.
' You don't get it. She's more than just an overprotective parent. '
He also gave you tidbits on how to appease her (and his dad and Ike, but mostly his mom).
Compliment the house, be polite and smile, offer to help clean up after dinner.
So, the day of the dreaded dinner finally came.
And right when you both stood in front of his house, about to enter, he asked: 'Nervous? '
And right after that he, out of nowhere, dropped this bomb:
' Yeah.. Honestly, if this goes bad, I may not get to see you again.
... Really. I'm not- I wish I were joking. '
Oh.
... Hey, so, what, you mean you're (Kyle) not willing to 'Two households both alike in dignity' this???
Star crossed lovers aside, Kyle is quite nervous. He doesn't want to think about the possibility of having to sneak out of the house to continue seeing you.
To ensure he'd have at least one person on his side, he bribed Ike with money, so in case of an emergency, someone would fill in the silence were it to fall between you five- before his parents would start to ask you about.. *shudders* your plans for the future
Extra pennies for Ike if he helps paint you in a positive light.
So after first impressions and greetings, the five of you - Kyle, Ike, their parents and you - were seated at the dinner table.
You've been asked a few general questions about yourself. Genuinely, it wasn't as bad as Kyle had made it out to be. His dad asked you about school and he seemed friendly enough. The dinner was nice, the atmosphere was nice, it was all going well.
Then his mom spoke up.
She began by asking the more.. Ground level questions about your relationship, when and where you met, how long were you two together.
Kyle was anticipating something to go horribly wrong.
But... Honestly apart from his mom having that certain Vibe of overprotectiveness, she was actually alright. She was alright. The meeting was alright. Hallelujah.
You did your best at acting like the proper perfect partner of Kyle and it must've payed off as he would later recount how his mom had said you were 'cute'
Kyle did not however mention the interrogation he had from his mother, with various questions about you. You survived meeting his family he is NOT risking scaring you off 😄
Although actually pause. As much he may get to complain about his mom at times, you cannot say a word about her☝
i do think Sheila would be the type of mother in law to be a bit, well, 'demanding'? The kind that expects her son's partner to know his medical history from memory, God forbid you forget in which season he's more prone to getting sick
But other than that she would be nice :) sweet and considerate of you too, I think
Type of mom to approach you to chat if she happens to see you out in public even without Kyle present.
Kenny ⋆ ˚｡⋆🗑˚
Conflicted, is how he feels about the idea.
You've met his siblings before. Karen, when he had to look after her or when he took you both out to spend time together. And Kevin when he happened to be home.
The interaction with Kenny's brother wasn't very long but it was pleasant enough.
As for Karen, she took a liking to you and bringing her along to your dates with Kenny became a common occurrence.
His parents however.... yeah he may have wanted to wait on that
But it had to happen eventually and so there you were at Kenny's house, a place not unfamiliar to you but the scene which you were in, sitting at the kitchen table with Kenny and his mom was a... New situation.
Kenny's mom was... Trying. Really trying to serve you some hospitality and politeness.
Correction, she was welcoming and kind. Making the best of what they have.
It was nice. And interesting to see Kenny act differently. Calmer perhaps? No, not quite. Quiet? A little... Maybe spectating instead. Just watching you two interact.
His dad, as you got to meet him later didn't seem too concerned with you. Which is to say that you introduced yourself, talked for a bit and he gave you whatever the verbal equivalent of a dad's usage of "👍" would be.
The normalcy of that day had been broken when later on, as you sat with Kenny in his room you could hear his parent's arguing. Though, for him that was nothing out of the ordinary.
The moment they have calmed down, Kenny decided it was time to walk you home. You got to share a kiss and then you walked to your house.
Back at his house his father actually asked him if they could talk. And they talked. For a minute at first, albeit with awkward pauses of silence. But they continued for another minute and then two. They talked for... Longer than he would've expected.
It was nice.
And Kenny couldn't recall the last moment as close to bonding with his father as this one.
Cartman ⋆ ˚｡⋆🍫˚
Average nightly text conversation with Cartman, which consisted of him sending you random tiktoks and just... Just the most random shit you could find online.
Then when you've practically almost dozed off, he ends his spam of messages with:
' my mom lowkirkuinely wants to like meet you'
' like tomorrow after school '
followed by this
Let it be known that Cartman was not exactly thrilled about this situation. Truth be told, his mom had already told him she'd like to meet you well over two weeks ago, he's just been putting it off for as long as he could.
Liane is very excited.
So Liane actually already knew about you. She knew who you were because : " oh, my Eric has told me about yo–" cue Cartman immediately covering her mouth and telling her to shut up.
Dotes on you. Gushes about you in fact.
You like her son, of course she likes you.
Tells Cartman to invite you more often.
He doesn't want to.
She invites you herself.
Would definitely love to show you any old photos of Cartman or share stories of him as a child.
Some are uhm. Questionable.
One time you come over a bit earlier than expected and end up chatting with Cartman's mom for some time.
Cartman later tells you that it was sooo lame of you two...
As if he didn't intentionally stay in his room longer just so you could finish your conversation.
Butters ⋆ ˚｡⋆🌼˚
I feel like he'd think of introducing you to his parents pretty early.
a) because it's the right thing to do
b) no matter his age, he'll be daydreaming of you two getting married, adopting like 5 bunnies and living a happily ever after.
c) he would get grounded if he were dating you in secret for any longer than a month or two
So, one day he said:
' Dear, don't you think- a-and if you don't, then that's.. That's fine too we could just.. Do it some other time... Would you like to meet my parents? '
It's not really something you expect to hear in the middle of a movie at the cinema.
He's the only one to do the full correct introduction of:
' Mom.. Dad.. This is [name] my s/o.'
God that format feels so.. Awkward
His parents are fine actually. Polite, interested in getting to know you, maybe just a tad - 'fake', as in putting a picture perfect persona. But that's gotta be normal for these sorts of situations, right?
They will point out if they don't 'like' something you do or say. It's not really in a reprimanding way, just...normal to them.
But not if it's Butters. Not with Butters.
You are a guest and it is your first time in the Stotch family's house so being unaware of some unspoken rules is to be expected of you and seen as understandable. Butters however is their son and thus they should expect him to act proper. I mean is it too much to ask for him to not completely embarrass them?
When they make him clean up after eating, they turn to you, as if feeling sorry...?
For you. That you willingly chose to bear with their Butters. They really don't know where they've gone wrong...
Butters returns, happy to see you all getting along so well. Unaware of how this day had changed, not necessarily your view or feelings toward him, but your understanding of Butters as a person.
After that, as soon as you get the chance, you're very huggy and affectionate with him. He reciprocates and innocently comments:
Hii, can u please write the main 4 x a fem reader that seems stupid but is pretty smart?
Reader who seems stupid but is actually smart (Featuring: The Main 4)
🌹| A/N : AAAH I'M BACK!! SO sorry for being gone for so long 😭 but I am here and queer and will try to publish more 🫶. OH and I didn't really include the fem reader part. I couldn't really think of a way to incorporate gender in here
🥀| Warning(s) : slight swearing, nsfw implications at the end of Kenny's part (I mean. It's Kenny)
Stan ⋆ ˚｡⋆🎧˚
Before you were dating he used to stare at you in class
He would've assumed you were more of an average student like him, especially since,, well to put it nicely you didn't quite fit in the image he had in his mind for a typical 'nerd'.
Is literally so proud of you always
I think it's safe to come to the conclusion that - due to his crush on Wendy - he's got a type
Smart people
Which makes him even more into you
Calls you a nerd (romantically)
Asks very nicely for your notes. Whether he wasn't paying attention during the lesson or if there's a test coming up, and his own notes consist of gems such as:
' yr 18?? some war happened or whatever
people died. like a lot of people
this guy was bad really bad
Boom '
You see him covertly sneaking peeks at your notes before you inevitably notice and pass him your notebook. When you get it back, you may sometimes find a small heart or star drawn in the margines.
If you're absent for any reason he'll roll his sleeves up and take notes for you.
Will gladly help you study. Although your studying usually ends up being only 1/3 studying and the rest is couple shenanigans.
He borrows your pens only to end up never returning them. But it's okay, because he buys you cute stationery in return <3
Kyle ⋆ ˚｡⋆📚˚
Academic rivals but not really because Kyle isn't as much of a nerd as many people in the fandom paint him out to be, which is an alright headcanon that can be fun but it relies heavily on its overpopularization. Hi, in this essay I will—
Initially, he. He didn't take you as the brightest.
Maybe it was in part due to how pretty people are quickly labelled as shallow or dumb, without there being any actual reason for it.
Point is: once Kyle realized that you were also smart is when he started catching feelings for you.
They were there beforehand, yes, but seeing you raise your hand in class and say the correct answer- several times, really did the trick for him.
well, that and the time you swiftly shut up Cartman; it had Kyle twirling his hair and kicking his feet mentally
He's glad to have someone he can have a genuine conversation with, when needed, but also just.. Have fun together.
Calls you a nerd. (Competitively)
KIDDING
You're more often than not, the one calling him that. And he just looks at you
' Takes one to know, huh? '
Boasts about a good grade he got, only because he knows you likely got a good one as well.
There's a teeny tiny chance he might get a teeny weeny bit pissy when you get a way better score than him. Or if yours is only 1 point better.
Studying together <3 (which is really just you two sitting in silence for most of the date and then going: 'hey you wanna watch a movie?' 'sure')
Also doing homework together. Then comparing answers and arguing which is the correct one.
i just got an idea for a short oneshot / drabble skdkkkd
Kenny ⋆ ˚｡⋆🗑˚
Okay random headcanon: Kenny is the type of guy who can pay no attention in class, open up his textbook for the first time ever only an hour before the test and pass. Not simply pass but with flying colors
But he will crash tf out if he opens his textbook, a reasonable few days before the exam to prepare for it.
He did not peg you at first as a smarty pants. Which was not meant to be insulting, as likely he wouldn't have cared either way. So long as you passed.
No really, I have a feeling Kenny would have a lot of patience for explaining stuff to someone (much more than the other boys).
Does like the fact you're smart.
He is giggling, twirling his hair as he asks:
' wait... So what did it mean again? '
He knows damn well what it meant he just wants to hear you explain it to him. Again
Calls you a nerd (romantically)
Studying with him doesn't work. Well, it goes well 70% of the time. Until about an hour and 10 minutes in, he says:
' so... When are we gonna start making out? 🤨'
—❗Slightly nsfw-ish implications below
Way too often has invited you over to 'help him study biology'. It's not even funny. It gets to a point where you just sit down and start explaining random definitions from the textbook
he still got turned on
Cartman ⋆ ˚｡⋆🍫˚
Refuses to admit how smart you are
He's trying to cope
No way you got both brains and beauty
He thought he would be the smarter one in this relationship
Asks if you'll do his homework (you won't)
Says you got lucky when he sees the high score you got
Gets real awkward when he sees you get upset over a - in your eyes - bad grade you got on a test
—> which he himself barely passed
does NOT know what to say
' well... You at least passed '
Or
' there there... Just do better next time. Nerd. '
Begs you to let him cheat off of you
Acts like he is the smartest person on earth when he gets a good grade on an assignment you helped him with
(As if he didn't spend 15 minutes begging for your help)
Calls you a nerd (derogatory)
BRAGS
not to be a simp on main but he does brag about it sonetimes
" you guys wish you had a partner that was this smart "
" Is it to compensate for your own lack of intelligence? "
☆ — summary: when cartman comes up with yet another 'get rich quick' scheme, he forces his friends, and you, into starting a ghost hunting service. armed with a mix of makeshift equipment, a questionable van and no actual skills, you begin taking jobs to "exorcise" haunted houses.
warnings: strong language, cartman being cartman.
(a/n): first chapter is out and honestly I don't really know where this is going!! also, I'm extremely sorry for the short length of this chapter :< --- usually, first chapters are always shorter! i'll try my best to make the other chapters longer :)
wc: 1932
★ m.list
★ series m.list
[NEXT] ->
The cafeteria was a chaotic mess as always. Muffled chatter, students fighting, and the occasional shout from the lunch staff scolding some kid for trying to sneak an extra carton of milk. You sat at the usual table in the far corner, picking at your food. Across from you, Stan and Kyle were arguing about some documentary they watched in History, while Clyde was halfway through his second slice of pizza.
"Alright, assholes, listen up!" Cartman's voice cut through the arguing boys. He slammed his tray onto the table for everyone's attention, the loud sound making Tweek flinch so hard he almost spilled his coffee.
"Oh, great, what now?" Stan groaned, leaning back in his chair.
"You're gonna thank me later, Stan." Cartman cleared his throat, glancing at everyone sitting at the table. "Because I just came up with the best idea of my life. No, of your lives, too, because you're all gonna be a part of it."
Kyle raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "Let me guess, some new way to scam people out of their money?"
"Yeah, Kyle, because having ambition is such a crime." Cartman shot back, rolling his eyes dramatically. "But no, this isn't just a scam. It's a business opportunity. A gold mine. And all you losers have to do is stop being such whiny little bitches and listen to me for five seconds."
"Dude, just get to the point." Stan muttered, his hands resting on top of the table as his brows furrowed together.
Cartman smirked, leaning forward on the table as if he was about to deliver a secret. "Ghost hunting."
There was a moment of silence, broken only by the distant crash of a tray hitting the floor somewhere across the cafeteria.
"Ghost hunting?" Clyde repeated with a mouthful of pizza.
"Yes, Clyde, try to keep up." Cartman snapped. "Think about it. Those dumbass ghost hunting shows on TV. People eat that crap up! We can charge idiots in this town hundreds of dollars to 'investigate' their haunted houses and get rid of their spooky little Casper problems!"
Kyle shook his head with a sigh. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Even for you, Cartman."
"It's not stupid!" Cartman shot back, slamming his fist on the table hard enough to make Tweek jump again.
"People are stupid, Kyle. They'll pay us to run around their creepy old houses with flashlights, pretending to find ghosts! And if there's no ghost? We'll just make one! Bang on some walls, throw some stuff around... Boom, paranormal activity."
"That's literally fraud." You pointed out, resting your chin on your hand. "You realize that, right?"
Cartman waved you off as if you mentioned something as unimportant as the weather. "Pfft, no one's gonna care. We'll make them sign waivers. Legal waivers make everything legit!"
Stan exchanged a doubtful look with you, then glanced back at Cartman. "This sounds like the kind of thing that gets us arrested. Or worse, sued."
"Oh my God, you guys are so dramatic." Cartman groaned, throwing his hands in the air. "Look, do you want to spend the rest of high school broke and boring, or do you wanna be rich and badass?"
"Rich and badass does sound kinda nice..." Clyde admitted, earning a glare from Kyle.
"Clyde, seriously?"
"What? I need the money! My dad cut my allowance because I spent it all on skins in Fortnite."
"I can't believe I'm surrounded by morons." Kyle buried his face in his hands.
"Ghosts aren't even real!" Tweek blurted, his hands shaking as he gripped his cup. "What if we mess with something we don't understand? What if we summon a demon or-"
"Tweek, for the love of God." Craig interrupted, his voice flat and bored. "You're not summoning anything. It's fake."
Tweek's eyes darted to Craig, then back to Cartman. "B-But even if it's fake, what if- what if people find out?! What if we get exposed or something?!"
"Tweek, no one cares about your paranoia." Cartman rolled his eyes. "Besides, it's not like we're actually gonna run into any ghosts. We're just taking money from idiots who think their houses are haunted because their furniture makes weird noise."
"I dunno, dude." Kenny finally spoke up, voice muffled by his hood. "What's the cut? Like, how much are we each getting?"
"Ah! The voice of reason! Don't worry Kenny. We'll split it... Fairly."
"Fairly?" Kyle immediately narrowed his eyes. "That means you're going to take the biggest cut, doesn't it?"
"Uh, duh, because it's my idea." Cartman shot back. "But you'll still get plenty. Enough to buy whatever poor people stuff you need, Kenny."
"Works for me, I'm in." Kenny shrugged.
"Dude!" Kyle exclaimed, looking betrayed.
"What? I need money!"
You sighed, glancing around the table. "So let me get this straight." You started, mentally preparing yourself. "You want us to break into random people's houses, pretend to find ghosts, and charge them a fortune for it? Do you even have a plan for how this is supposed to work?"
"Of course I have a plan!" Cartman replied, puffing out his chest. "Step one, we make a website and some fake business cards. Step two, we spread the word around town. Step three, profit."
"That's not a plan." Stan muttered, leaning back in his chair again.
"It's a great plan." Cartman's brows furrowed together. "And you know what? If you don't want in, fine. But when I'm rolling in cash and you're stuck eating this nasty ass lunch food, don't come crying to me."
Stan groaned, rubbing his temples. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but fine. I'm in. Only to make sure you don't burn someone's house down."
Kyle threw his hands up with a groan and a roll of his eyes. "Oh my God. You're all insane."
"Come on, Kyle." You smirked, nudging him with your elbow. "It could be... Interesting."
Kyle stared at you as if you just suggested jumping off a bridge. But after a moment, he sighed heavily. "Fine. But if this ends in a disaster, I'm blaming all of you."
"Perfect!" Cartman grinned, looking around at his newly recruited 'team'.
"Welcome to the South Park Paranormal Crew, bitches. First job is tomorrow night. Bring flashlights and maybe some fake blood."
Craig glared at Cartman. "Tweek and I never said we were joining."
"I don't care about you losers, go sit on a dick or something." Cartman shot back.
Craig's eyes narrowed, his piercing gaze burning holes through Cartman. "You know what? I'm in, fatass." He spoke through gritted teeth, to which Cartman smirked.
"I-I guess I'm in too." Tweek stammered, his hands shaking uncontrollably.
"Amazing! What do you guys say we have a meeting at my house this night to prepare for tomorrow?" Cartman held a smug and confident look.
"Do we have a choice?" You sighed, already tired of this.
"No. Eight o'clock sharp!" He declared. "Don't forget that, fuckers!"
.
.
.
.
Later that night, the group crowded into Cartman's basement. The space was a mess, an old couch shoved against one wall, half empty soda cans all over a coffee table, and a mysterious stain on the carpet that no one wanted to investigate. You sat quietly between Kyle and Craig, who were both visibly annoyed.
Cartman stood at the front, a whiteboard behind him covered in messy scrambles of ideas that looked more like the ramblings of a lunatic than a business plan. He held a marker in his hands, which he twirled dramatically before slamming it against the board.
"Alright, assholes." He began, pacing in front of the group. "Step one of becoming the greatest ghost hunters South Park has ever seen: branding. We need a website, a killer name and a look that screams 'these guys are legit'."
Stan rolled his eyes from his spot on the couch. "It's hard to scream 'legit' when you're using your mom's basement as headquarters."
"Shut up, Stan!" Cartman snapped. "Do you have a basement we can use? No? Then sit your ass down and let the professionals handle this."
Craig crossed his arms, leaning a bit closer to you, his knee brushing yours. "You don't even know how to make a website, do you?"
"Of course I do!" Cartman lied, puffing out his chest. "It's easy. You just... Click some buttons and stuff. Besides, we have Kyle for that."
Kyle straightened, glaring at Cartman. "Excuse me? Since when did I agree to be your tech support?"
"Since you're the only one here who isn't a complete moron when it comes to computers!" Cartman replied, his tone annoyingly smug.
"Watch it fatass!" Stan snapped as Craig snickered.
Kyle opened his mouth to argue but stopped when you nudged him gently. "You might as well just do it." You whispered. "The sooner we get this over with, the better."
Kyle sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair. "Fine, but I'm not doing this for free."
"Whatever, Jew." Cartman turned back to the whiteboard. "Now, let's talk names. We need something catchy. Something cool."
"How about we call ourselves 'Paranormal Posers'?" Craig deadpanned, earning a laugh from Kenny.
"I've got it!" Clyde exclaimed, clearly excited. "What about 'The Phantom Chasers'?"
"Lame." Cartman dismissed immediately, crossing it off the list. "We need something badass like 'South Park Paranormal Commandos'."
"Or we could just call it what it is." Stan muttered. "'Cartman's Latest Scam'."
"Do you want to get sued, Stan?" Cartman shot back. "No one's putting my name on this thing."
After another twenty minutes of ridiculous suggestions, and several rounds of arguing, you all finally settled on a name. Specter Squad.
"Simple, memorable, and cool as hell." Cartman declared, underlining it three times on the board.
.
.
While Cartman and the others brainstormed more ways to make themselves seem legit, Kyle sat at Cartman's ancient desktop computer, typing at it furiously.
The homepage was basic but effective.
A bold header reading "SPECTER SQUAD: South Park's Premier Ghost Hunting Team" in glowing green text, complete with a stock image of a haunted house in the background.
"This looks so fake." Kyle muttered to himself, shaking his head as he uploaded a photo of the group. It was a hurriedly taken selfie from earlier that night, with Cartman front and center, beaming like an idiot, while everyone else looked irritated.
"Fake is fine." Cartman said, leaning over Kyle's shoulder. "People don't care about professional. They care about scary. Make it spooky."
"Spooky costs extra." Kyle shot back.
The rest of the group gathered around as Kyle added more details to the site.
Services
- Full Paranormal Investigation
- Ghost Removal
- Cleansing Rituals
Reviews
Janet H. - "Specter Squad saved my family from a scary ghost! Worth every penny!"
Sal F. - "I thought my apartment was haunted and they proved me right. Highly recommend!"
"Who t-the hell is 'Janet H.'?" Tweek asked, pointing to one of the reviews.
"Some lady I made up." Cartman replied, completely unfazed.
.
.
With the website finished, you all moved on to advertising. Clyde and Kenny volunteered to print out flyers, which they plastered all over the school the next day. On lockers, bulletin boards, and even the bathroom stalls.
Cartman, meanwhile, moved to social media, creating an Instagram page and spamming hashtags like #HauntedSouthPark and #GhostBeware.
"You think anyone's actually going to believe this?" Craig asked as everyone watched Cartman upload a blurry photos of an attic claiming it was 'evidence' from a recent investigation.
"Of course they will." Cartman replied confidently. "People are dumb. Trust me, by this time tomorrow we'll have our first client."
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