Ana Lucia Henry

Co-Owner & Manager of Jack of Spades Bar | 28 | Don’t mistake my kindness for weakness. I am kind to everyone, but when someone is unkind to me, weak is not what you are going to remember about me.

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

Grayson was on a natural high and nothing could get him down – but it’s just that he cared about Ana having fun too and the pressure of living up to some expectations had him aching for that extra confidence Scarlett promised drugs could give him. She said they take about fifteen seconds to kick in and last just about fifteen minutes and that didn’t sound dangerous at all to him. It was just a temporary boost and then he’d stop. How did people even get addicted to drugs? He was certain it was more of a mental moment, a placebo effect, because when he was younger, all of his friends were talking about getting so wasted that they couldn’t walk, didn’t remember things – and as much as he drank (and he drank until he was sick at times) he never had those issues. “Nah, it’s alright.” He took the bags from Ana’s hands. He wasn’t a dealer, he wasn’t going to talk anyone into doing things they don’t want, but he was going to try this out one way or another. With the razors of his teeth he nicked the bag, by now completely released hold on brunette so he could have hands free to take the straight shooter out of his front ant pocket. It did cross his mind that he could have problems if someone caught him doing this in center of the club, but the only lights flickering in the broad space were rapid laser greens that offered no visibility and truly, no one cared. Just to be safe, though, he was fast on emptying the white contents into the small glass pipe and then placing a small piece of steel wool at one end of the pipe tube and rock on the other side of the filter. “You don’t mind if I do, though?” he asked with a single brow cocked, teeth sunken into the flesh of his in a smile dragged out lip, a flamed lighter just inches beneath the rock supposed to get heated for the vapor to come out. Alright, so he knew the technicalities…

[analuciahenry]

There might have been a time where one could have convinced Ana to try a drug so toxic, so consuming that you didn’t even know it was getting under your skin. But after losing her sister to such a thing and the potential that it could happen to any number of those closest to her, she just didn’t see the point. Though she had to admit to herself she was a slightly disappointed it wasn’t weed. The excitement of such a low-key buzz enhancer was appealing, and she could probably ask any one of the haze-induced bodies surrounding them if they knew where to get some, but in a place like this, who knew what it could be laced with. She decided she was perfectly fine without it, the euphoria of just being in such a setting was enough to allow her to float freely through the night. A small part of her wished Grayson would do the same, pocket the drugs and save it for another night so they could both enjoy their time together purely based on the other’s company but she wasn’t one to tell another what to do. “Yeah, no, go for it.” She shrugged, eyes following his fingers as he dropped the product into the pipe. “You’re a big boy,” Both of her hands remained settled on his hips by the waistband of his pants, “You can do whatever you want.” She watched as he lit the flame, her head shaking slightly with a baiting eye roll. “Besides, it looks like you already know exactly what you’re doing. It’s too bad, I was really looking forward to teaching you a lesson.”

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

Whatever he’d expected of Ana, this wasn’t it; guess she was less of a grandma than he imagined her to be. In fact, she was of such youthful spirits and in possession of such intoxicating energy that he caught himself feeling like an incubi, feeding and striving off of it. While it did catch him by surprise, with what ease and comfort her features slithered against his, he was far too familiar with the sensation of less known figures being handsy with him to feel out of control. In fact, to touch of this sort of intimacy he responded best and he too lacked shame in having his hips rock against her own in typical grinding manner for these parties. The proximity helped too, not a breath of air between their heavily bare, slick bodies and when they moved, they did so languidly and in unity. “I’ve never smoked period – but this thing is different.” He took her hand, fingers resting against and in between her knuckles as he lead them to the low behind of his spine and only continued guiding them further, until their conjoined hands were nestled in the back pockets of his pants where the small bags of stuff he’d gotten from Scarlett rested. Shit, he’d forgotten the lighter though. “Just a second…” he mouthed against her lips smiling before turning around and shouting out for the nearest person to them, since the crowd was thick and everyone was basically grinding against everyone. “HEY MAN, YOU GOT A LIGHTER?” he shouted out and the man himself looked high on something, nodding at Grayson with that dopey smile that made him think I want to feel that way too before reaching for his pockets and handing Grayson the lighter. “THANKS.” He added but the man had already stopped paying attention. “I’m afraid I’m totally not cool. You have to show me how this shit works. Teach me.” He tried to make out the last part sound as dirty as possible, a pelvic thrust forward so obviously forced in perfect timing just to emphasize the words.

[analuciahenry]

The glories of being in this underground extravaganza was that it was too dark, too obscure and most importantly, the fact that no one cared who was who. Every single body in that building was there to enjoy themselves, the image of who they were during the day time was all but obliterated by the casting of neon lights. It was the complete opposite from Ana, shedding the protective layer marriage had coated over her persona. The bass dared her to come out of her shell, wooed her to let her inhibitions go – insisted she grip Grayson tighter at the waist. “I never would have guessed.” She laughed, the man proving her wrong yet again. She had no problem letting him control her movements, nails grazing against his flesh until they hit the cusp of his pants and disappeared into the depths of his pockets. Fingertips toyed with the baggie that resided there; Ana thinking the contents were to be that of a joint just waiting to be smoked. She caught the corner of her lip between her teeth, nodding against his forehead, her skin tingling with excitement. Aiden was a distant thought at this point; not because she loved him any less and not because Grayson was taking his place, but because for the first time in a long time, she was enjoying herself. No worries, no cares, just pure, unadulterated fun.  She stood a little taller and her eyes gleamed a bit brighter as endorphins fueled her good mood, a gentle pinch to Grayson’s ass through his pants as she waited for him to retrieve a lighter. She let the music take her away; the curves of her waist rolling with the beat until Grayson’s lower half thrust provocatively forwards into hers, bringing her gaze back to his. “I don’t think that will be a problem.” She spoke with a smoky voice, the baggie caught between her pointer and middle finger as she slipped it out of his back pocket. “Just don’t make me regret the fact that I didn’t bring my whipping stick.” She let the words drip from her lips as she more than enjoyed their banter. But her eyes dropped as they landed on the contents of the baggie, her swaying slowed and her brows bent inwards. It sure as hell wasn’t weed but crack cocaine. “I-“ Thoughts of Claudia rushed forward; her sister had died only months earlier from a drug overdose. “Oh mi dios, Grayson!” She kept it light hearted, not wanting to bring him down, laughter laced in her words. “I thought you were talking about pot!” Ana wanted to have fun but she didn’t need drugs of this caliber to do it. “As much as I want to play student and teacher with you, I’m afraid this is one of the few subjects I don’t really know a whole lot about.”

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

Well, some found the smug little shit expression oddlyendearing and judging by Ana’s ogling, she might as well be one of those persons so he said why fucking not to himself and followed her inside. It was a respectful thing they had going on between them, this equality/versatility or whatever it was deal where they transferred torch of domination back and forth and it was nice. He didn’t mind following, didn’t mind leading; neither got to his head or to his ego and it was just…carefree and fun. And he needed that, now more than ever. Nevertheless, he did maintain some control over himself, not allowing his gaze to wander further past her eyes because he still respected Ana more than he respected girls he’d pick up clubs for a semi-public quickie, and that’s without sharing names with each other. This was different; they were friends and there was something to lose, whatever that is. He couldn’t afford losing any more friends now that he was basically friendless. A cheerful shout scraped his cords as they mingled in between jumping bodies, and he wasted no time to sneak his arm around Ana’s waist and pull her tight against his body, another arm in the air as his body slipped into the rhythm of the music. “Don’t be ashamed, you can touch.” There was a permanent grin glued to his lips and he wasn’t embarrassed of it, being caught in the euphoria of the crowd and party and all that jazz. They were so close that their foreheads were practically touching and if he was to get any closer, with their gazes connected as they are, he’d probably start laughing at the imagery of a single alien eye of Ana’s he’d get from such proximity. “I’ve got something for the high. It kicks in right away, doesn’t affect you for long – never tried but we could…” he announced against his lips, a little loud for comfort, but insignificantly so considering the noise.

[analuciahenry]

Ana squealed and cheered the deeper they fought to get into the crowd. Losing her shirt was probably one of the better decisions she’d make tonight; the gigantic room was packed wall to wall and essentially became a hot box of body heat and sweat. It reminded her much like one of those hot yoga classes a friend convinced her to take; she hated it and left halfway through. But the vibe of those surrounding them and shot of adrenaline that Grayson’s arm injected through her body as his arm snaked its way around her waist made the setting drift into the void. It wouldn’t have mattered if it was a thousand degrees, she was far too focused on other things. “I don’t do shame.” One hand of her own found its way up to the curvature of his neck, fingertips just barley dancing their own groove, tangling in the tips of his hair. Ana let the music carry her, hips swaying, legs finding a comfortable motion in and between his while her other hand sought to hook her thumb in the waistline of his pants, her fore and middle finger sliding in through his belt loop to keep them connected. “Oh, come on.” She leaned in a bit more to near her ear to his mouth as he spoke so she could actually hear what he was saying before switching so her own lips brushed at the ridge of his ear. “You mean to tell me you’ve never smoked a joint before?” Thinking it was something as innocent as pot that he was offering her. Since the night of the Governor’s Ball she had wanted to try and keep a clear mind around him. That way should anything actually happen, she’d know it was of her own choice and not under the influence. She’d have no one to blame but herself. Ana hadn’t smoked since college and for a trip down memory lane, why not? “I don’t believe you! Not for a second!” She pulled back slightly so he could see the taunting disbelief in her face, a peachy keen grin still painted on her face.

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

Ana’s unawareness was endearing in its own way and he couldn’t but shake his head in lighthearted disbelief, lopsided grin stretched all the way to his ear. “Don’t let anyone hear you - they’ll think I brought a grandma in for supervision. Can’t let that happen!” Grayson joked, glancing back and forth behind his shoulder and at the building in front of them, the fact that he was in accelerated contemplation apparent on his irresolute features. A huff and fingers around the brunette’s wrist away “Please, romance and I…” he felt like that was a thought that didn’t require continuation or conclusion but the more time did it pass, the more foreign those words tasted on his tongue. Like something had changed and he didn’t know, or didn’t want to know, what. It didn’t quite feel like a lie, but it lacked sincerity - much like a joke. He pulled the woman with him in decisive steps towards the place, a mildly audible “Come on” almost drowned out by the chatter of those who’ve come out to watch fireworks. He shifted on his feet, walking backwards to guide them in so they’d be facing one another, mischief written all over his expression “I’ll take you up on that word, Mrs. Fun.” And yes, the mrs was intentional. Right in front of the doors that lead them towards the ground of thumping beats and roaring music, Grayson released his hold on Ana and reached over for the collar of his shirt behind, taking it off until he was left there shirtless “It’s a rave party. No one cares.” As if to explain what he meant by that, he expressively allowed his eyes to wander up and down her features and wiggled his brows in final emphasis. 

[analuciahenry]

“Call me a grandma one more time and it’ll be the last thing that you ever say.” She goaded at him, glaring playfully. Brows raised as he took her by the wrist, consciously opting to let any talk of romance drop from the conversation; that was the last thing she wanted to discuss. Ana followed gleefully behind him as he tugged her along, weaving through the crowd of unknown faces; if anything, it was a welcomed change of pace. Things between her and Aiden had come to an undeniable halt. Even after their hot and heavy romp on the table during off hours at their bar tensions remained and it only further drove a wedge between the ailing lovers. He seemed to be spending more and more time at work, leaving Ana to her own - for lack of a better word - demise. Gleaming sea green hues sucked up Grayson’s devious behavior, his impulse helping to reawaken tendencies she once harbored years ago. She stared as he removed his shirt, unashamed by how her eyes lingered on his bare chest, her top row of teeth nipping gently at her bottom lip as her grin grew. Challenge accepted. With one swift tug of a pin out of the bun that sat atop her head, loose locks fell down and over her shoulders. She reached for the hem of her shirt, tugging it over her head to reveal a black laced bralette beneath. She had nothing to be embarrassed about and knew well that the people inside would be wearing little that left nothing to the imagination. “Well, what are you waiting for?” This time she was the one to reach for him, her hand gripping at his as she led him inside, the thrumming beat of the music causing every inch of her body to vibrate.

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

“You haven’t been in the underground area, have you? There’s definitely a wild rave going on there.” he responded, referring to the party going on in the cellar of the building in front of which they stood, where the whole celebration was hosted. Lots of denudative, sweaty, foamed up, stranger bodies grinding one against the other to the hypnotizing dubstep beats; well, if that wasn’t his favorite sort of wild then…”I prefer the real sky lights. I’ve always enjoyed stars and constellations but that’s sort of a cliche romantic thing to discuss now…” he glanced over Ana’s features and accepted the bottle, holding onto it rather than continuing to drink “I’m surprised to see you here. You looking for some fun?”

[analuciahenry]

“The underground area?” She questioned, “No? I didn’t even-- wow, this party is a hell of a lot bigger than I thought.” She looked back up to the dissipating fireworks, her foot tapping as she considered her options. “To be honest, I haven’t been to a party like this, especially not one with a rave in-- well, shit, I can’t even remember the last time I went to one.” Her nose crinkled in the way it might had she bit into a lemon. The more she hung around Grayson, the more she began to realize just how dull her life had become. “Yeah. Something tells me you weren’t drawn to this party to have conversations about romance.” She laughed, turning to look back over at Grayson, his face reappearing and disappearing with the final splash of fire in the sky. “Surprised? I’m not sure if I should be offended by that or not.” She teased, her shoulders rising and falling with a subtle sigh. “Don’t you know who I am?” Her elbow nudged at his arm. “Had you done your research on me properly, you’d know fun used to be my middle name.” She broke out into a toothy grin. “And I think it’s about time I start living back up to it.”

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

In forms of colorful sprinkles fireworks spread over the NYC’s night skies. He’d gotten the invitation to this party from a guy he met in college and it was nothing short of amazing. A girl next to him extended a bottle of Jack and he gladly accepted it, taking a generous swig before extending it to the next closest person to his side “Wild night, huh?”

[analuciahenry]

Through a friend of a friend she had heard about this party being thrown downtown. There wasn’t a stigma to the name of the person throwing it so she figured it might actually have the chance to be an enjoyable night. “Wild? I wouldn’t say that just yet...” She spoke up, having wandered over after seeing him from afar. “These fireworks though...” She took the bottle from him, contemplating whether or not she wanted to travel down that path again. “They’re pretty incredible.” She lifted the bottle to take a sip, one much smaller than Grayson had allowed himself and offered it back to him.

[delgadoryan]

"Fine, I’m in. But if I get arrested for this I’m taking you down with me." Laughing, a tad nervously, Ryan moved around to the side of the horse she was on. There was a nagging sensation in the back of his mind that this wasn’t the smartest decision he’d be making this week, but then again, when did he ever make truly smart decisions these days? He’d chalk it up to a moment of mania and call it a day.

[analuciahenry]

Ana fell into a bout of laughter as Ryan rounded up next to her, their hands ready to cut the reins loose so that the horse could run free. “Oh my god, Ryan.” She spat out, her cheeks flushing pink from laughing so hard. “You thought I was serious?” She shoved him lightly before making her way back to the sidewalk. “I mean, c’mon. I know I’ve done some pretty stupid things in my life time but I’m not that stupid. We’d be arrested in a heart beat!”

[vilkas--nemes-deactivated201507]

Smirking, Nadia allowed her sister to link their arms and shrugged off the comments. “No, we don’t, but you know that I’m always in a hurry. There are always things to see besides some giant monster.” It was no secret that Nadia hated horses. Her fear of heights extended to climbing on the back of one of the majestic beauties and they were so much larger that is caused an uneasiness in the blonde which kept her edging away. “You forget that I grew up here Ana, this is really all that  know besides the glimpses of Madrid that I got. I love it here. This is my home.” Nadia looked carefully over her sister’s features, brows furrowing in concern. “You are. Does this by chance have anything to do with what you were saying the other day about loving and not being in love?” She knew her sister liked to do stupid things, but Nadia was honestly worried that Ana might be so far out of her own head that the younger Delgado couldn’t pull her sister back in.

[analuciahenry]

“Okay, first of all, he is not a monster. And second of all, who lit a fire under your ass? Where exactly is it that you’re in a hurry to get to?” Her tone was light and playful. “Yes, this is our home. But it isn’t our only home. One day you and I will both travel back to Madrid and I will show you the beauty that is where we come from. One glimpse of it and I promise, you will never want to come back.” She grinned up at her sister, memories from a much happier time with her family floating to the forefront of her mind. “Ah, no. No, not at all. Please, Nadia,” Her gaze fell, lips flat lining once more. “Ignore everything I said the other day. I was--” She struggled to find the correct word. “I was a bit out of my mind. Nothing to worry about, I promise you, I just had a long day is all.”

[rodrigodelgxdo]

"Well, I don’t know." His tone was suddenly one of irritation. "There was an endless bar of alcohol and if you were as intoxicated as the paper is making it sound, then who knows what could have been said about us… or you." It wasn’t as if Rodrigo spilled intimate details about his life and business with Ana, but he knew she and Diana spoke often and didn’t need any conversation between them hitting the newsstand. "You should stay away from him. People like him are snakes."  

[analuciahenry]

"Well, I still had enough sense to tell him no, didn't I?" Though she might have been thinking differently in her head. "Listen, Rodrigo, I appreciate your concern but as I told Aiden and as I will tell anyone that thinks they have the right, I can make my own decisions." She shifted hesitantly in her stance. "And if when you said us, you really meant you, don't worry, I, unlike others, don't make a habit of divulging details about other people's business that isn't my own."

[the-healing-nest]

She had been too busy trying to transform herself into the kind of person who doesn’t need anything from anybody, a wall of pure bricks. In the meantime, she had forgotten that when people walk into walls of bricks, they get hurt.

Unknown  (via ladystigmata)

[aiden-henry-blog]

I'm gonna love you | Aidana

[aiden-henry-blog]

The fact that she did not resist his kiss came as somewhat of a relief to Aiden, though it shouldn’t have - they were married after all, it wasn’t like they were strangers in a bar meeting for the first time. They had been intimate many times before, in many places - some very risky places, especially at the beginning of their relationship - but there was a part of him that thought that maybe she would resist, that maybe she would be hesitant to accept the affection and desire he now poured into her. It was the encouragement that he needed, the confirmation that it was okay to continue, and so he did. His hands gripped tighter, his arms pulled her in closer and he deepened the kiss. He was desperate to have her, it had felt like years since they had last touched like this- though it was merely weeks if that - and there was this uncontrollable desire to prove himself, to be the man she had married again, to love her the way he used to and not the way they had become accustomed to. 

When she wrapped her legs around him, he lifted her - hands cupping her ass as he moved them to one of the nearby tables. With one quick swipe of his arm the few items that the table had bore, like a candle holder and menu, were sent flying to the floor. The candle landed with a crash but he didn’t care, he didn’t even look up, didn’t stop from kissing her as if his life depended on it. Setting her down the table he finally pulled back and wasted no time in pulling his shirt over his head, grabbing the back of his collar and in one swift movement removing the item of clothing before turning his attention to her own. He wanted to rip it from her skin, leave it in tattered pieces on the floor, but he knew she’d probably disapprove of that after the fact and also the thought scared him a little. He wasn’t usually this boisterous, or this rough, he was usually more gentle even before when the fresh excitement of their relationship ruled their intimacy. Instead he distracted himself, running kisses down her neck and along her collar bone as his hands slipped beneath the black material, feeling their way up her sides as his thumbs hooked the hem pulling it up as his hands traced her ribs. He waited for her to raise her arms, before tugging it over her head and crashing his mouth back to hers once more. 

[analuciahenry]

An almost girlish giggle was expelled onto his lips as he lifted her, arms tightening around his neck as he carried her through the air and a soft groan oozed out when he placed her down on the table. Sex had never been something that the Henry's had an issue with but with the past few years of trying to have a child, it put a bit of a damper on it, for Ana at least. Because she knew that each time he finished, the end result would be the same; shooting blanks. It didn't kill her appetite to have him between her legs, but he was her husband and there was supposed to be a point to having sex with each other past the basic carnal desires. Except tonight, that was the only thing it was about and Ana had absolutely no objections. She paid no mind at the crashing of glass on the floor, Aiden's lips on hers completely captivating. Hungry kisses were planted on his torso as he removed his shirt, her hands exploring every ounce of exposed skin, soft moans trailing into the air as she shot her hands up into the air so that Aiden could remove her shirt. Without hesitation she unclipped the hinges to her own bra, her legs drawing him in closer once more so that she could feel him closer against her. "Pants, off." She demanded, fingers working feverishly to unhinge his belt buckle.

[delgadoryan]

Perking up at the suggestion, Ryan gave her a shrewd, somewhat suspicious glare that barely covered the smile gracing his lips. “You want to spring a horse free? Sure that’s a good idea?” Quickly he backed himself up with, “Not that I’m not interested, because I totally am, just wanna make sure this isn’t some kind of trick.”

[analuciahenry]

"No, of course it's not a good idea but so what?" Were they somewhere in the country she would have totally gone for it, but New York City was packed full of bustling cars that would no doubt cause some sort of injury. She opted to keep that bit to herself though in order to see how far she could get Ryan to go. "Not a trick, Ryan. You in or you out?"

[dianaxdelgado]

"I would like to say that it wouldn’t happen again, but this is an instance when mistakes are continually repeated." Diana responded, offering the smallest of looks She knew that her husband would drink, that everyone else around her would drink and the inevitably of an argument or fight starting was high. "Rodrigo can be…difficult, but he protects what he loves and I see a side of him that no one else does. That’s how I put up with it." She of course said nothing of her admiration for the beast inside him…but that was something that could not be shared with anyone. "I am sure that if you give him the cold shoulder for long enough, he’ll get the message."

[analuciahenry]

"I guess I can say the same for Aiden. I know a lot of people," She had wanted to include 'and you as well' but opted to leave the statement general, "Think that Aiden is just some poor chump but he's a good man. Better than most and no he isn't disgustingly wealthy but it's not the money we're interested in." She swallowed her pride. "And honestly, it's him that deserves better, not me." It was a hard admission but something she was slowly beginning to come to terms with.

[romyclark-blog]

but it's vera wang / romy & ana

The only way to describe how she felt was heavy.

The weight of her own actions that disgusted her rested on her shoulders and wouldn’t let up. They had a physical impact on her; the memories that made her stomach churn with guilt plagued her sleep. Her subconsciousness sabotaged her with dreams of Nadia’s lips on hers. As much as it bothered her that she couldn’t just let go, those fantasies were far sweeter than thoughts of seeing Diego’s face crumple. It was so hard just to relax. She was so hyper aware of the wedding band around her finger or how she had to keep telling herself you love him whenever Diego came home, weighed down by medical books. 

You love him you love him you love him. 

The mantra was constantly on repeat. It told her to roll over to Diego in the morning and murmur a hoarse and sleepy ‘good morning, my love’ in his ear. It had her drumming her fingers on his chest, on the name of his daughter right over his heart. It had her hands in his hair and her lips on his jaw. The mantra tried to chase away the guilt that made her skin itch and crawl ever since she had kissed Nadia. Because she had. It was all her. It didn’t matter that Nadia had been the one to finally close the distance between them. Romy had dropped the lighter that set the house aflame. 

You love him you love him you love him.

As per usual, her thumb was running over the metal ring around her fourth finger and her lip was caught in between her teeth. Her other hand was reaching out for the ivory material, almost aching to feel the soft silk. It was breathtaking and it almost seemed like the entire shop was modeled around the faceless mannequin and the dress that fell to the floor and created a pool of fabric around it. 

Rosemarie’s fingers curled back into her palm and her hand fell back to her side. She didn’t want to stain the wedding dress with her unfaithful touch. She didn’t deserve something so beautiful, just as she didn’t deserve Diego. Even though all the pair were doing was just looking, not even trying dresses on, but it was still somehow painful. A knot in her stomach tightened. She turned to Ana, forcing a smile that did lift her spirits a little. Fake it until you make it and all that jazz. If you could trick your body into thinking you were happy, it was easier to fight off the thoughts that taunted and threatened your little act. 

Hoping to take any attention away from how not okay Romy was, she thought now would be as good a time as any to offer the role of leading bridesmaid up to the brunette beside her. “You know, I thought these people were supposed to load the bride and her maid of honor with free champagne so they can’t see the crazy price tag on these dresses.”

[analuciahenry]

Dumping her own internal struggle into a bag, tying it up tight and tossing it into the trunk of her mind became a necessity the second Romy had asked her to browse wedding dresses for the big day. Ana jumped at Romy’s request, a resounding yes shooting out of her mouth before her best friend even was able to complete the question. There might have been some selfish undertones for wanting to help as Ana never got to wear an actual wedding dress having been married on a beach in the Caribbean. They had booked a flight spur of the moment and she had worn a white cover up over a white bikini; it sort of played in her and Aiden’s favor when it came to consummating the marriage, no mess of buttons and ties to fuss with. Now, it wasn’t to say that a big to do and ball gown had been her dream growing up, but just the entire process of prepping for a big wedding – that was something she had missed out on so she fully planned to ride the hype for Romy and Diego’s wedding all the way home.

“Wait, Romy, are you serious?” Ana had an idea that she’d be in the bridal party but was genuinely shocked that Romy had wanted her to be the maid of honor. “You want me—oh my god, yes!” It was almost like their own mini proposal as Ana tugged Romy in for a warming hug. “Now, don’t you worry. Keep looking through the selection and I’ll get these wenches to get us some bubbly.” Ana insisted, disappearing behind the nearly endless racks of white gowns until she found their attendant. 

A few minutes later and Ana returned with two flutes filled with champagne and raspberries that had settled at the bottom. “She’ll be bringing out the rest of the bottle in just a moment.” Ana beamed, a smile plastered on her face, certain she hadn’t smiled this much in so long but she was beyond ecstatic that Romy was about to become a part of the family for real. “Now, here, take this.” She handed Romy her drink and took a few steps back to clear her throat. “I just want to make a little toast. Okay, so, Romy. Seriously, the day you walked into our bar looking for a job was probably one of the best days of my life. And I mean that because look at the incredible friendship that has blossomed. You are one of the sweetest, kindest most fun loving women I have ever had the pleasure of meeting in my entire life and I just fucking love you to pieces. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love Diego too, but he is one lucky bastard to have you in his life, let’s be real.” She let out a chuckle and raised her glass. “But in all seriousness, it’s going to be a ride. There’s no dancing around that. You already know how harsh our extended family can be, but just know you will always have a friend in me, no matter what. So, welcome to the family Romy!”

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

It’s odd, how same sentences could hold different connotation when spoken by different persons – the sort of self defense that kicked in when another attempted to put him down, but sheer acceptance when he’d do it himself. It’s like he was the only one allowed to hurt him and it was a motto by which he lived his entire life. One part of his brain offered and look how that went for you, while the other argued with maybe you wouldn’t even be here if you let someone in close enough to hurt you. The latter had his mind fly towards his 18 years old self standing in the kitchen, holding a knife that he’d initially aimed to use for slicing bread right against his wrist – until he’d realized what thought had passed through his brain for the first and last time ever. The fact that this situation reminded him of it had him shudder against the light breeze that held more of spring warmth than winter chill, and it had him crossing his arms against his chest as if trying to shield himself from the weather. Christ, real, we, no, husband, a lot, better, me – he could understand a word here and there, approach it like problems he wasn’t familiar with using the system of elimination, trying to deduce what Ana had said in her native tongue. But he figured, if she spoke in a way that would assure him not understanding, then she probably didn’t want him to know, and he too was at times guilty of vocalizing his internal monologues because saying things outloud seemed to do wonders for making them seem more real. “It’s okay.” It wasn’t. Her apology was, but he wasn’t. Okay, that is. And it had taken him this to realize that. And just that, because he still didn’t understand what it was that is wrong. He had a problem but didn’t know what it is, so he could not solve it; not yet, at least. He could lie to her, but even having things assumed about him when in possession of truthful arguments felt much better than having to lie to defend himself. So he opted for the truth: “I wrote that you’re the only smart Delgado because of your financial distrust in Cameron, because a small fraction of yours and Aiden’s conversation about your financial issues was overheard. I’m pretty sure I know what’s going on with your state of…thing we’re not talking about. And I called myself a scoundrel you said a weak no to, even though your body was saying yes. But that article is sitting in the desk of my office, unpublished. So whatever you read, it wasn’t me.”

[analuciahenry]

Ana stretched her arms out as Grayson spoke, her chin lifting slightly as she arched her back and stood straight again, fingers drumming atop the arched cement of the wall in front of them. “While a part of me wants to kick you in the nuts for actually going forth and writing an article about me,” She paused, hoping that he had only done it because he was hurt by what happened the other night, “A bigger part of me knows I have no right to really be angry because well, for one, I kind of deserved it, maybe—“ The sides of her nose crinkled as she contemplated that one, “But more so because you actually just told me the truth when I asked for it.” She went on good faith with this one unless he was just that good of a liar. “I’d ask you to shred, delete or do away with whatever you wrote it on but then I’d be going against my whole no expectations thing, huh. And if you plan on publishing it or writing more about it, I'd rather not know. I'll take the blow when it comes out with the rest of the public.” Brows raised as her chest heaved high, a relinquishing sigh helping to ease her shoulders from previous rigidity. “But hey, at least you think I’m smart and you called yourself a scoundrel.” She had to laugh, nudging her elbow lightly into his side to try and get a smile to grow, lightening the conversation even more then it already had. “Así es la vida!” Since the day she had met Grayson it had been an almost unbearable up and down roller coaster that managed to pull off some very tricky twists but she felt eerily at ease around him even with all that had happened. He just seemed to—get it. Whatever it was. “It means 'that’s life', by the way.” She kicked the toe of her shoe at the wall, chewing at the inside of her cheek before blurting out, “Hey, do you want to go ice skating? You know, get our blood pumping or-- something. I don't-- I'm kind of getting antsy just standing here like we should just shake hands and part ways again like last time.”

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

I can and will make my own thoughts of you based solely off our own personal interactions. It was just about the only thing he required of her right now, really. With his nerves ominous on the very edge and everything else around him falling apart but his professional life, he had very little to hold onto before his insecurities got the best of him and it was even worse if someone was taking away his option of proving his worth by believing words of others about him. No, Ana didn’t owe him anything; he didn’t believe in such thing, but he at very least felt it was a fair thing to do. And blame it on his upbringing among two women of law, but he was big on fairness and justice; hell, he even fought with everything he had to keep his articles, even when against his belief, somewhat just with objectiveness. He was trying really hard and all he wanted was some recognition; was that so hard to find? "Thank you." he but whispered out, feeling as the two words of kindness lifted a heavy weight off his chest, pushing his shoulders down as tension slowly seeped out of his muscles. He was but a rag doll under her pull, allowing the woman to take him aside which was a smart decision he was unable to make on his own under the red influence of his anger. Her fingers burned against the skin of his arm like cigarettes being put out against his flesh, leaving the crumpled grey ash there instead of bruises like an arsonist that she was. She always could set him on fire. "You don’t owe me anything, Ana." he liked the way her name sounded on his lips, even if the cherishing tone frighteningly resembled Aiden’s tentative one when he used it. "I don’t want you to pretend - I don’t know who you are, not even close to figuring you out because you’re downright confusing. But I’m trying, I’m interested in finding out on my own and I can only ask so much from you as well. Not just you, but everyone I’m interacting with. I’m tired of giving and not getting, people just take things from me and I’m not even sure I know who I am anymore any more that you do.” It felt awfully intimate, admitting this to her and they’ve gone from strangers to this, whatever it was, so quickly that the very fact that this didn’t feel wrong when it should - was a whole another level of wrong on its own. Inappropriateness, it seemed to be their thing, and having that realization dawn upon him had his lips imitating the weak smile on Ana’s own, just more lighthearted and less of a lament. Not being able to feel down around her for long, that too seemed to be a thing, although he wasn’t sure if mutual thing that is. "And why you? Maybe because with none else did I feel like I can come to when I’m at my best and at my worst. Maybe because you’re not a girl boys pick up at club, fuck and then forget. Maybe because you’re the ideal of a woman who a man would want to marry one day. Because you’re promising and engaging and truly interesting, and because you didn’t seem like you’d push me away like most does, because they value their arrogant egocentric infamy than their actual selves. And just maybe because you and I are fucked up in the same way and crazies attract each other.”

[analuciahenry]

“You’re welcome.” She responded just as softly as he had as they seemingly jumped the hurdle of misunderstandings.  “You’re right, I don’t owe you anything.” She felt the need to make that point very clear. “I never want anyone doing anything for me solely based on the intent or expectation that I will return that favor.” She couldn’t have sounded more priggish, her eyes pinched shut for a moment as she shook her head in disagreement with her own words. “That’s not really what—“ She opened her eyes to look out at the vastness of the park, using her hands to help convey her point. “What I’m trying to say is I don’t want people doing things for me because they think I need a favor or because they feel bad for me or because they don’t think I can handle it myself. I just want people to do things, regardless of whatever it is, and I’m speaking very generally here, because their kindness is true to their character.” She took a few seconds to recite everything she had just said in her head; it made sense in her own mind, she only hoped she hadn’t confused Grayson with it more than he already claimed her to be. “My point is, with me, you don’t have to worry about it being one sided. To give, we have to get. There will be no free hand outs in this—“ She paused, gaze dropping and lurking at his hands from the corner of her eye. “—friendship.” She sniffled in the cold air, undeniably happy to see him crack a smile, relief settling in that they had eradicated the deception of wrong impressions about each other. But once more, intrigue settled into the creases on Ana’s forehead as Grayson answered her earlier question that she thought he never would. She turned to face him, her hip resting up against the stonewall as freezing fingers sought refuge in the pockets of her jacket. She almost felt flattered, up until the end of it until he called both their bluffs. “Yeah, well, if I’m supposed to be an example of the ideal woman that men want to marry and bring home to mother than this world has more to worry about than I thought.” She turned a fairly serious truth into a joke, a foot rising so she could tap her foot into the ground; a subconscious move to try and create warmth. “Follar Cristo, realmente estamos jodidos, ¿no?” It was a rhetorical question that drew out some sort of sadistic snort, causing her to face forward against the wall as she bent herself over, arms folding against the top of the stonewall for her to rest her chin on. “Mi marido se merece mucho mejor que yo.” She mumbled beneath her breath, praying that if Grayson heard it, he didn’t yet know enough to understand her. And if he did, that he would just let it float off into the wind without comment. “I’m sorry.” She blurted out, her head remaining down and her posture at an odd angle that left her bottom jutting out into the side walk so others were forced to walk around her. “I shouldn’t have jumped down your throat earlier. I should have asked instead of assumed.” She looked up at him with doe shaped eyes, her brows reflecting an apology in the way they bent. “But I have to ask, just to completely clear the air so we can move forward without question, you didn’t—“ She chewed at her lip for a second, “You didn’t write anything about me in the papers, did you?”

[graysonsantos-journalist-blog]

"I don’t know, alright?" A pause, and an answer three times quieter than the previous question, almost defeated sounding. "I don’t fucking know." His chest was heaving from all the anger he’d allowed to slip out of his mouth, nostrils widened, lips pursed giving out the idea of the internal struggle he was facing with. "I just did, it’s as simple as that. I wasn’t thinking; wasn’t thinking when I approached you and certainly not when I kissed you. It was an instinctive choice and yeah, I’m no better than animals when it comes to controlling my urges sometimes because despite the idea you all have about me, I too want to be happy. With more than just shagging around. And it seems like it’s impossible these days, to acquire that without being selfish." She wanted honesty; she had it. It hurt, seeing her flinch away from him, but he swallowed the bitter aftertaste the motion left in his mouth and continued. “You’re wrong. I wanted to approach you as if you’re more than just your name. I gave you a chance to be whoever you wanted to be, a no one even, pretended I don’t know you, so you’d get to introduce yourself to me as whomever you want me to believe you to be. I was much kinder than most would ever be.” It felt odd, asking for people to recognize his kindness because he usually didn’t care for their sympathy, but this was Ana and…and he didn’t know. It’s just that with her, everything was different. "You’re mad because you’re just the same. And probably neither of us is particularly happy with ourselves at this moment."

[analuciahenry]

His lack of an answer was almost exactly what she had been looking for. She didn’t want him to provide her with one otherwise he might have truly had an agenda. But the fact that he didn’t know, just like she didn’t know how or why she was feeling the way she did about him—her marriage—life in general, made him that much more of tangible and touchable person. He wasn’t a fake; the anger that spewed out of him was too raw, too authentic for that. Though not as intensely, Ana’s chest fell into a rhythm of breathing that matched Grayson’s, the fervent moment getting the best of her emotions. That always seemed to be the case with him. “Please stop saying ‘you all’ like I am everyone else.” She pleaded, her tone lighter now as he had lowered his own voice. “I can and will make my own thoughts of you based solely off our own personal interactions,” Her eyes danced between Grayson and other passing by. “And right now, I’m still trying to decide what those thoughts exactly are.” She wouldn’t admit it, not here, not now, but the fact that he was being straightforward with her was playing in his favor. “But what I’m really trying to figure out is why me when you could have literally any other woman or man that walks past you.” She wasn’t asking again, rather saying it out loud as if the answer might pop into her own head; his point made clear that he had no idea. Just from hearing him talk, it was obvious he had his fair share of partners, more than probably she had in her lifetime, but that wasn’t of her concern. She didn’t understand if maybe because she was married it posed a more dangerous and daring challenge to him or if maybe, it was more than that. “And that’s where you’re wrong, Grayson.” She stepped forward, reaching out to grab at his forearm and pulled him towards the wall that stood as a perimeter around the south side of Central Park. “I am more than just my name and when I say that I mean that I don’t want to pretend. Not with you, not with anyone. Pretending is what got me here in the first place.” She began to speak to him normally again, dropping her hand from his arm to convey his point that neither of them was truly happy at this point in time but in a slightly more respectable manner. “I don’t want to give you some false connotation of who I am, because that’s—that’s not me. I’m a very real human being, Grayson. I say what’s on my mind, I act as I feel in the moment—“ She paused, biting her tongue at the disgusting realization. “At least that’s how I used to be.” She turned away from him, leaning forward on the stone wall as her head dipped low between her shoulders, a sigh filled with disappointment in herself clouding the air. “I know you were.” She acknowledged their first meeting. “That’s why I was so drawn to you in the first place, Grayson.” She had to admit it because it was true. “Because you seemed to embody such genuine benevolence and interest that is so rare to find in a person these days.” She glanced over at him, a weak smile infiltrating the left corner of her lips. “But for the love of god, don’t make it sound like I owe you for being better than most others would in that moment we first met.” She shook her head gently, looking back out at the masses of people in the park despite the cold weather. “Please, don’t do that.” She nearly begged; her tone now fully transitioned to embody burden and gloom.