Learner’s Permit
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Summary: Lucifer reluctantly agrees to help Mammon learn how to drive.
Category: Gen
Rating: General Audiences
Language: English
Characters: Lucifer, Mammon
Additional Tags: pre-I Do, learning to drive, first driving lesson, driving instructor Lucifer, flustered Mammon, stressed Mammon, bickering, written just for fun, please don’t take this seriously - I didn't, no MC, no beta
AO3
FFN
Learner’s Permit
“Please, Lucifer!” Mammon begged on his knees as he clasped his hands together.
Lucifer put his own down on top of the document he had been in the middle of reading and signing as he turned slightly in his chair towards Mammon.
“I said no.”
“I’ll never ask anythin’ of ya ever again!”
Lucifer let out a hum of disbelief.
“I’ve heard that one before, besides cars are expensive to buy and then there’s maintenance costs, tax, insurance, gas—”
“Woah, really?” Mammon blinked in surprise before he quickly shook his head and redoubled his efforts. “I mean, yeah of course I know all that! I’ll manage it!”
“You’ll manage it?” Lucifer raised a skeptical eyebrow. “With your mounting debts and no motivation to pay any of them off?”
“Come on, Lucifer!” Mammon pleaded again. “I’m literally beggin’ ya here! I’ve picked a car out and everythin’!” Mammon reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a page that he had torn out of a magazine. “See! This is how serious I am!”
Lucifer heaved a sigh as he took the glossy page from Mammon and surveyed it.
“A Demonio 666 Lexura?”
“Yeah!” Mammon nodded enthusiastically as he got to his feet and looked at the page over Lucifer's shoulder. “Doesn’t it look great! I’ve already applied for seven part time jobs to start savin’ for it!”
Lucifer frowned down at the picture, “don’t you think that you’re being a little too ambitious? Especially for a first car?”
“Lucifer, I promise ya, even if it takes me centuries and a million part time jobs, I’ll save up the Grimm if ya just teach me how to drive,” Mammon’s tone became pleading again, “just think about how much quicker I’d save up that Grimm if you taught me rather than paying for driving lessons?”
“And what about RAD?” Lucifer asked as he arched an eyebrow at Mammon again. “Surely you don’t intend to fall even further behind in your studies and student council work?”
“O-of course not!” Mammon ruffled the hair on the back of his head. “I’ll work extra hard there too!”
Lucifer’s disbelief deepened, he recognised that nervous, non-committal tone easily, but he couldn’t deny Mammon’s determination about this car and learning to drive.
Despite his better judgment, Lucifer relented with a sigh.
“Alright, fine.” Lucifer reluctantly agreed as he refolded the page in his hand and offered it back to Mammon. “We’ll head out first thing in the morning, don’t be late. And make sure you read up on the highway code.” He added in a warning tone.
“Seriously?” Mammon’s face lit up. “Thanks, Lucifer!”
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Mammon yawned. He was sitting behind the steering wheel of Lucifer’s stationary car on a long empty stretch of road that was lined with bushes and trees. Lucifer was sitting in the passenger seat beside Mammon.
“You need to focus if you’re driving.” Lucifer said sternly.
“I can’t help being tired!” Mammon argued. “Anyway, the car isn’t even on yet!”
“Tiredness leads to negligence, now concentrate.”
“‘S not my fault ya chose to do this so early in the morning,” Mammon grumbled. “Hm?” He watched as Lucifer reached towards the glove compartment. “What are you—?”
Mammon’s eyes widened as he watched Lucifer pull out a clipboard and pen from the glove compartment.
“Wha—? Are ya seriously testing me right now? This is only my first lesson, cut me some slack, will ya!”
“No seat belt,” Lucifer murmured as he ignored Mammon’s question and motioned towards the slack seat belt with his pen, “I’ll have to mark you down for that.” Lucifer began to write on the piece of paper he had attached to his clipboard.
“W-wait! Hold on a minute will ya!” Mammon tried to protest in a flustered voice as he fumbled for the seat belt. He pulled on it too hard, making it jam several times before he finally clipped it securely into place.
“Hands should be at ten and two on the steering wheel,” Lucifer muttered under his breath again with a disapproving tut as he scrawled another note on his page.
“S-slow down! I was putting my seat belt on!” Mammon argued defensively. “Besides, I don’t think that’s a rule anymore!”
Lucifer paused before giving Mammon an incredulous look, “it’s always been a rule.”
“Yeah, probably centuries ago!” Mammon snapped as reached across the car and snatched the clipboard out of Lucifer’s hand before tossing it over his shoulder onto the backseats. “Ya stressin’ me out!”
Mammon took a moment to calm down with a deep breath before putting the key into the ignition.
“Did you check your mirrors?” Lucifer asked.
Mammon paused with a frown, “I thought ya already did that when ya drove us here?”
“You need to adjust them for yourself.”
“Right,” Mammon nodded as he checked his wing mirrors and then adjusted the rear view mirror.
Mammon then gripped the steering wheel and stared out of the windscreen. His hands tightened on the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white, he could feel Lucifer’s gaze boring into him.
Lucifer finally spoke up after a few moments.
“You need to push down on the clutch with your left—”
“I know.” Mammon cut across him.
“Then you need to turn the key all the way to start th—”
“I know.” Mammon said more insistently as he pushed his foot down on the clutch and turned the key, making the car roar into life.
Mammon hesitated again as he stared at the long, empty road ahead.
Lucifer prompted again, “don’t forget to put the gear into—”
“Give me a minute. Just lemme go at my own pace, okay?”
“Alright.” Lucifer nodded.
Another moment of silence passed between them while Mammon, with his foot still pressed down on the clutch, moved the gearstick into first gear.
“Good,” Lucifer nodded again, “now set your pedals, you only need to press the gas a little. Then lift the clutch until you find the biting point.”
Lucifer waited patiently for Mammon to follow his instructions before continuing.
“Don’t forget. Mirror. Signal. Manoeuvre.” Lucifer explained as he pointed towards the passenger side window. “Check your blind spot, your wing mirror, and your rear view mirror,” he motioned towards each point as he spoke, “then signal with your indicator, check your other wing mirror and the last blind spot to make sure it’s clear, when it’s safe to do so, take the handbrake off and pull away from the curb.”
Mammon gave a nervous nod as he muttered repeatedly under his breath, “mirror, signal, manoeuvre. Mirror, signal, manoeuvre. Right, got it.”
Mammon glanced at his blind spot and mirrors as Lucifer had instructed, indicated, and checked his remaining mirror and blind spot before taking the handbrake off and pulling away.
Lucifer nodded with a hum of approval, “when you’re ready, come off of the accelerator, push the clutch down and change to second gear, then gently back on the accelerator while you slowly lift the clutch.”
Lucifer watched Mammon’s progress closely as the car moved further down the road until they came towards a dead end. With Lucifer’s guidance, Mammon slowed the car while pulling up to the curb and stopped.
“Now you’re going to turn the car around.” Lucifer instructed.
“Turn it around?”
“That’s right. Keep the car in first gear, move forward a little and then fully lock the steering wheel to the right, make sure you keep looking around and check your surroundings.”
Mammon took a deep breath before glancing around and beginning the manoeuvre, pushing his foot down on the accelerator more than needed and making the engine rev and the car lurch forwards.
“Ease off the gas and move slowly!” Lucifer warned in a stern voice.
“I’m trying!” Mammon rebutted.
Mammon’s foot instinctively pushed down further on the accelerator.
“Mammon, ease off! Slowly!”
“I know! I know!”
In a panic, Mammon released the clutch too fast, making the car lurch again before stuttering and stalling. Mammon let out a shaky breath as he gripped the steering wheel tight again.
“You lifted the cl—” Lucifer began.
“I know I lifted the clutch too fast!” Mammon snapped irritably.
“Handbrake back on, calm down and try again.”
Mammon gave a small nod as he put the handbrake on, pushed down on the clutch and restarted the engine. He reset his pedals, checked his surroundings, and began the manoeuvre again, making the same mistake of revving the engine.
“Ease off of the accelerator.” Lucifer warned in a calm voice. “You need to do the manoeuvre slowly.”
“Slowly.” Mammon repeated in a muttered voice as he released the handbrake and steered the car.
“Better.” Lucifer nodded. “Now you want to reverse and fully lock the steering wheel left.”
Mammon shifted the gearstick into reverse.
“Check all around, use the clutch, lift and dip it to keep the car moving slowly.” Lucifer continued to explain in the same calm voice.
Mammon glanced about himself and over his shoulders several times before lifting the clutch gradually and quickly turning the steering wheel to the left.
“Slower.” Lucifer warned.
“I am going slow!” Mammon replied in a frustrated voice.
“Pay attention.”
“I am!”
“You’re about to hit the—”
The car’s back wheels bounced off of the curb, making Mammon tense up as his foot quickly found the break.
“—curb.” Lucifer finished with a small sigh.
“Well I wouldn’t have hit it if you didn’t distract me!” Mammon said defensively.
Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose and held back a sigh of exasperation before maintaining his calm demeanour.
“Back into first gear and finish the turn.”
Mammon let out a frustrated huff as he shifted the gear again and slowly moved the car until it was facing the right direction.
“Good, now keep driving, don’t forget to change gears.”
Lucifer continued to watch Mammon closely, frowning to himself when Mammon looked away from the road as he changed gears.
“Keep your eyes on the road,” Lucifer instructed.
“I am.” Mammon’s voice was laced with impatience.
“You’re too close to the curb,” Lucifer pointed out, “you should be positioned in the middle of your lane.”
“I am.”
“You’re not.”
Lucifer reached towards the steering wheel, making Mammon jerk it and the car swerve into the other lane just as another car was heading towards them from the opposite direction.
“MAMMON!” Lucifer shouted instinctively as he grabbed the steering wheel and forced the car back into the correct lane, narrowly missing the passing car.
At Lucifer’s shout, Mammon panicked and slammed his foot on the brake, making the car jerk and shake before the car finally stalled again.
Lucifer and Mammon stared ahead out of the windscreen, Mammon’s knuckles white from his grip on the steering wheel while Lucifer’s hand still held onto the steering wheel too.
Lucifer slowly relinquished his grip on the steering wheel and sat back in the passenger seat, still staring straight ahead out of the windscreen.
Lucifer cleared his throat, “maybe lessons with a proper instructor would be better.”
Mammon could only manage a shaky nod.
Lucifer surveyed Mammon before adding, “maybe I should drive home too.”
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Mammon ran up the steps to the House of Lamentation with a piece of paper clutched in his hand. He took the steps two at a time before he jammed his door key into the lock and nearly fell through the door.
He wasted no time in rushing up the stairs and bursting into Lucifer’s bedroom, his hand still held the door handle as he stood in the doorway panting for breath.
Lucifer, who had been reading in a chair in front of the fireplace, rested the book in his hands into his lap and gave Mammon a reproachful glare.
“Will you learn to—”
But Lucifer’s sentence trailed off as soon as he realised it was Mammon. His expression softened as his gaze slowly trailed down to the paper in Mammon’s hand.
Lucifer closed his book and placed it on the arm of his chair as he stood up and took a step towards Mammon.
“Did you—?”
“I passed!” Mammon enthused excitedly, still breathless from his running as he held up the certificate fo Lucifer to see.
A proud smile tugged on Lucifer’s lips.
“Well done, Mammon. I knew you would.”
Lucifer reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys, holding them up towards Mammon.
Mammon’s expression became awed as he slowly stepped forwards and took the keys from Lucifer, he turned them over in his hands and ran his thumb over the unmistakable Demonio 666 Lexura logo.
“No way,” Mammon murmured in disbelief as he looked back up at Lucifer, “seriously?
“It’s your reward for all of your hard work,” Lucifer chuckled as he watched Mammon, “it’s waiting for you in your room and it's all yours.”
