Been really super obsessed with this game again đȘ

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@anonymousaphid
Been really super obsessed with this game again đȘ
had to share these here too :>>
I hope I can render these soon, I miss drawing this man
He was not easy to draw đ maybe will try again with my Durge
purple chronically ill wizard i have some thoughts about you
HAPPY
Shadowheart đ€
OG photo (pose ref) made by marinachoyy
Random style experiment
hot take but if the camp played hide and seek astarion would absolutely be the one to rat everyone else out the second he gets found first.
like he gets caught behind a tent and immediately goes "oh no! gale , darling, you can come out from under that invisibility cloak now, tav already knows we're here"
Art by @lindayss
Posted with permission
The world needs more Baby Star!
I mean, look how adorable he is!!
You can't tell me you don't wanna pinch those widdle cheeks of his đ„ș
He's literally the embodiment of an elven cherub
Let's turn someone inside out
another meme pic redraw wwwđ°
What you would see if you looked over Astarion's shoulder in the public transport/sidewalk/grocery store line.
âąGrumpy Catâą
Heâs judging YOU! đ«”đ»đ
Redrawing of an old illustration I made one year ago! đ
[Full res and more versions on Patreon for free members!]
Grumpy Cat by Nim's Art on Patreon. Join Nim's Art's community for exclusive content and updates.
oh narcissus, where has your reflection gone?
took me over a month to finish this eugh worth every second
sketch:
đ°đđ§ that old meme...
~ Astarion's Vampire "Family" Dynamics Pt. 1 ~
TW/CW: discussion of abuse, dysfunctional family dynamics, scapegoating
Okay, here goes my first long analysis post on Tumblr. This was originally a three-part series on Reddit and some of you may have read it before, but I've spruced it up with some images and additional thoughts. I originally wrote this after many discussions about how the vampire "family" presented in the game eerily and accurately portrays how many dysfunctional families play out in real life. Although these are fictional characters, the topic and themes discussed are very real to many people (including me) and so I would ask that you please be respectful in the comments.
In making this analysis I found this video very helpful as it contains all the recorded lines of Cazador and Astarion's "siblings".
Cazador, the abusive "parent"
Iâm going to start by focusing on the abusive parental figure, Cazador, who, although not a parent to the spawn, is trying to establish some sort of warped family dynamic. He displays many characteristic consistent with an abusive/narcissistic parent.Â
1. An obsession with power and control. Astarion mentions multiple times how obsessed Cazador is with power, especially power over people. Cazador frequently expresses that Astarion belongs to him - I counted 13 different lines where he refers to Astarion as âmineâ. (If you want to see what imo is the scariest version, skip to 6:32 in this video and notice Cazadorâs face and growl in his voice as he says âheâs mineâ). Cazador also mentions how after the ritual he will be âfree to crush any that stand against me with merciless power!â Power and control are clearly his MO.
2. Arrogance and grandiosity. If you visit Cazador without Astarion, he can brag about the ritual and be excited to have an audience. âBlessed are you all to witness my ascension.â He has other high opinions of himself too: âI have been gifted with inordinate intelligence.â Even the way he speaks is over-the-top and screams grandiose egomaniac.
"Witness the birth!" So happy to have an audience.
3. Related to the above, Cazador is concerned with appearances and social status. He hosts extravagant parties and wants to be seen as one of the âgreat and goodâ of Baldurâs Gate.
4. A strong sense of entitlement. When you arrive to confront Cazador he is throwing a tantrum about Astarion ruining the ritual he is entitled to. He scream writes in his journal âI WILL HAVE MY DUEâ after Astarion doesnât return. He believes his spawn owe him their gratitude for everything (in his mind) that he has done for them. Thereâs also this line, which I think sums it up his sense of entitlement beautifully: âI am the immortal Cazador Szarr. And I always get what I want.â
5. Professional victimhood. Related to that sense of entitlement, Cazador is also a professional victim. Out of every miserable soul in the palace, he's the one that's really suffering. He has a diary just for writing down how much his spawn disappoint him (never mind the fact that heâs the one abusing them). The infamous line of âI have known you for two centuries. Have I not suffered enough?â to Astarion is another example. Ironically, Astarion would have happily left at any time if he could have, making Cazador âsufferingâ his presence Cazadorâs own fault.
6. Gratification from humiliating/degrading/hurting someone. Astarion tells us Cazador took pleasure in his pain. We also see a few examples firsthand. If you talk to Cazador without Astarion present and tell him that Astarion is scared, Cazador will respond âindeed, he is terrifiedâ with a gleeful expression. Another example is how much Cazador visibly enjoys riling Astarion up during their confrontation and the malicious joy in his eyes when he incapacitates Astarion and tells him he is a âsmall, pathetic little boy who never amounted to anything.â
The face of someone who is relishing the pain he is causing.
In addition to having these traits, Cazador uses techniques straight from an abuserâs playbook.
Gaslighting/blame shifting: Abusers use gaslighting to try to get their victims to question their reality. A related term is blame shifting, in which the abuser refuses to take responsibility for their actions and instead places the blame on the person they hurt. Cazador does both of these. He takes every opportunity to tell Astarion how grateful he should be for the âgiftâ Cazador gave him, attempting to shape Astarionâs reality into one where Cazador is his benefactor instead of his tormentor. When Astarion calls Cazador out on his actions, Cazador is quick to shift the blame to him. For example, when Astarion talks about how Cazador never forgave anything and constantly punished him, Cazador replies: âI strove for perfection in all things, even those as imperfect as youâ - i.e., âitâs your fault I had to punish you so much. You should have been better.â Â
Double binds: A double bind is when the abuser places someone in a lose-lose situation. The classic one is Cazadorâs âdiningâ ritual where Astarion could âchooseâ between eating a decaying rat or being flayed. Astarion even says âhard to say which was worse.â Another example is during the confrontation. If you speak up for Astarion, Cazador will berate him: âhave you fallen so far that this speaks for you?â But when Astarion does speak for himself, Cazador flips the script and now berates him for talking too much: âI fondly remember your empty boasting, your tired jokes, your endless prattle.â Damned if he does, damned if he doesnât.Â
Infantilization: Cazador does not treat Astarion as an adult or even slightly competent. He calls him boy, child, brat and tells him âwithout me, you are less than nothing.â Obviously we know that Astarion is very capable without Cazador. Infantilization is just another tool to chip away at Astarion's confidence and autonomy and maintain control over him.Â
Sowing discord among the spawn: Iâll touch more on this next, but Cazador purposely pits the spawn against each other so that they have no chance of uniting against him.
If I had to choose one quote of Cazadorâs that I feel really encompasses him as an abuser it would be this one: âYou were only ever a means to an end. I made you to be consumed.âÂ
For many abusers, people only exist as an extension of them, for the purpose of meeting their needs. In real life, people may not be consumed in the sense of literally sacrificed in a ritual, but their needs, wants, and personality are consumed to fit what the abuser desires. I think looking at Cazador helps to understand Astarion's character and what the spawn went through, not just physically, but psychologically. Cazador can already control his spawn by compelling them, but his use of these other techniques are a way to further his control, disorient and confuse them, and chip away at their sense of self. To me, this Cazador is more terrifying than if he were just a generic evil vampire lord, because the abusive techniques he uses hurt real people every day. Heâs so realistically-written that heâs almost triggering.
The spawn dynamics
Unfortunately, we donât get a lot of information on the spawn dynamics, however itâs clear that there is some degree of infighting. One example is in Violetâs diary, where she talks about putting garlic in Yousenâs bed and also calls Yousen a âruntâ and Leon a âsnobâ. Petras and Dalyria seem to get along better than others in the Flophouse scene, but even then they are arguing about whether they should go back to the palace or stay and get âone more markâ for Petras.Â
Any infighting between the spawn was certainly encouraged by Cazador. He also established what looks like a golden child/scapegoat dynamic in the family. This particular dynamic is common in familial abuse and basically involves the golden child or children receiving extra privileges and more positive attention while the scapegoat receives blame, criticism, and the brunt of the abuse. In this case, the âgolden childâ is whoever is the âfavored spawnâ at the moment. Although they are still abused, they get to live in relative luxury with their own room, privacy, and access to blood. This system works out well for Cazador, as it does for all abusers, because it forces the spawn into competition for better living conditions, reducing the likelihood of any unity within the spawn, which could threaten Cazador.Â
In terms of the scapegoat, I believe there is plenty of evidence in the game that Astarion was forced into this role:
Astarion says his âscreams sounded sweetestâ to Cazador and in the same conversation says that he pities his âsiblingsâ now that heâs not around to take most of the abuse.
Astarion is not on the âfavored spawnâ list, which shows that he wasnât the golden child, at least.
Cazador focuses especially on Astarionâs mistakes and punishments in his journal.
The spawn call Astarion âmasterâs favorite toyâ, ârunt of the kennelâ, and say he âalways whimpered when he got beatâ - implying he spent the most time out of all of them in the kennel being tortured.
Astarion says that ânobody ever looked out for meâ or âsaid a kind word to meâ, implying that he was especially isolated.
Definitely giving him a hug next time I load up my file.
In terms of the other spawn, it appears they also perpetuate this scapegoating dynamic:
Both Petras and Leon call Astarion âruntâ. Petras even says he should be âput downâ.Â
The spawn call Astarion âweakâ for not fighting back, but also call him stubborn and mention that he ânever liked following ordersâ. They also guilt-trip him for currently fighting back and not going back for the ritual. These contradictions show that it is less about Astarionâs behavior and more about the fact that they just need to blame him for something. The scapegoat is never meant to win.Â
The spawn parrot a lot of Cazadorâs criticisms of Astarion - he talks too much, he thinks heâs funny and heâs not, heâs weak etc., essentially going along with his scapegoating.
Leon and especially Petras are the two spawn that have the most negative things to say about Astarion. In the case of Petras, he certainly seems to have not only a history with Astarion, but also appears the most supportive of Cazador:
âYou donât know what my lord is capable of. You donât know his power.â
âTrue power only comes from the master.â
âThe master has always been strict. But weâre better for it!â (After origin Astarion tells Petras that Cazador has given them nothing but beatings)
If Petras is truly somewhat pro-Cazador, then it makes sense that he would be the one that goes along with the scapegoating most heavily, since he is either more likely to see things the way Cazador does, or more eager to gain his favor by going along with his narrative. Astarion also becomes extremely angry when encountering Petras, hinting at a level of suppressed rage and history between the two of them, perhaps because Petras went along with the scapegoating.Â
In terms of Leon, he mentions wanting Astarion to fight against Cazador with him in the past - perhaps to help him free his daughter - but it seems Astarion didnât and that led to hostility. However, Leon is the current âgolden childâ in the favored spawn room and has not been a spawn for very long. He is certainly still a victim, but he probably hasnât become as jaded as Astarion has and canât really see his perspective, which may lead to him having harsher views towards him and contributing to the scapegoating.Â
Having a scapegoat benefits an abuser for a variety of reasons. One of them is absolving them of their terrible actions by placing the blame on the scapegoat. Think about how Cazador presents the ritual to the spawn. To them, he presents it as a wonderful gift that will allow them freedom - failing to mention that he will actually be sacrificing them. Then, when Astarion isnât around for the ritual, Cazador gets to blame him for ruining this wonderful gift. Even though the ritual is delayed, Cazador still benefits from the narrative - he gets to be the âgood guyâ and Astarion, the problem, perhaps even a problem that his other spawn will eagerly catch and drag back. I can picture Cazador throwing a tantrum, telling the spawn âitâs all your brotherâs faultâ. Cazador also punishes the spawn when they fail to bring Astarion back, giving them another reason to blame and hate Astarion because they could avoid that if he would just fall in line. Chamberlain Dufay also blames Astarion when heâs afraid of being substituted for the ritual, calling him a âbratâ instead of placing the blame on who it really falls - Cazador - for planning the ritual in the first place. Cazadorâs narrative seems to have worked, because when the other spawn reunite with Astarion they call him out for ruining things and even tell him heâs not part of the âfamilyâ anymore:
âThis is our only chance to be free, to end centuries of slavery. You will not ruin it, Astarion.â (Aurelia)
âDonât listen to him, Dal. Weâve been loyal. Weâve earned our reward. Unlike the runaway.â (Petras)
âI canât believe youâd turn on us. On your own family.â (Dalyria)Â
âHeâs NOT our family. Not anymore.â (Petras)
This is very typical behavior when the scapegoat goes against the family.
Finally, a scapegoat is an example of what happens if you get on the abuserâs bad side. It keeps people who arenât the scapegoat afraid of ending up like them. For this reason, the other spawn can find a way to benefit from this. As long as itâs not them, they can avoid some of the abuse by hiding behind Astarion. They can also gain some protection by going along with the scapegoating behavior. I want to add, that even though Iâve discussed the harmful behavior of the other spawn, they are absolutely also victims of Cazador and if they are going along with the scapegoating, it is a survival tactic in a ruthless environment. In the same vein, I also want to acknowledge that Astarion most likely hurt his siblings as well - there are references in the game to him lashing out. But the fact remains that when the other spawn go after him, they are punching down, just as Cazador wants them to. Astarion did not have a high status in the âfamilyâ and almost certainly got the most frequent abuse. This may be why heâs not so hesitant to sacrifice his fellow spawn when he is considering the ritual. In his mind, these people perpetuated his abuse, to some degree. Yet, he still feels some sympathy and compassion for them, which it doesnât seem like all of them return. Itâs a very complicated situation.
That's all for part one. If you've read this far, thank you, and please feel free to leave a comment! I'll be back for Part 2, where Iâm planning to touch on my personal theories on why Cazador selected Astarion as his scapegoat.Â
sketch dump! close ups under the cut