[bob-belcher]

[shock]

why does tumblr keep trying to convince me that ellen degeneres is dead

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

Just saw an ad for a portable blender that you charge like a phone and it was like “take it anywhere!” and showed someone using it on a dark plane and let me tell you if I were on an overnight flight and the lady two rows up just got her baby to sleep and the flight attendants are all whispering and the person next to me pulled out a fucking BLENDER Id go absolutely fucking apeshit

[suspected-spinozist]

My favorite ever pronoun story has to be one of my German professor’s. He fondly remembers being mugged by a gang of teenagers in Dresden, who used Sie (formal you) the entire time.  

[ask-sparkling-awesomeness]

HAND OVER THE WALLET MY GOOD SIR

[william-snekspeare]

the second panel was originally going to have words but I decided it was better without them

[bellasredchevy]

omg Bella Swan look out behind you the car is skidding oh no she has airpods in she can’t hear us oh god oh fuck

[catchymemes]

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[gotitforcheap-deactivated201611]

Richard Dawkins getting owned by reddit user pissyturdfucker_420 needs to be written into future history books, this should be his legacy

[realitytvbitch]

[ruinedchildhood]

Why is this so fucking relatable flsjdfkjsldjfa

[ichigoflavor-deactivated2024042]

[nullifiedneet]

It’s like being in an alternate reality seeing the real picture in this post lmao

[myfairynuffstuff]

[caterpie]

Visit Original Link

Wii Shop Channel | Nintendo Wii (2006)

[caterpie]

The Wii Shop Channel closes its virtual doors today, around 13 years after the Wii’s original launch date. The end of an era. RIP 2006-2019

[captainpeachperfect]

“Anna said she experienced the mintiest on-screen kiss in film history…”

[macaulaytwins]

a red truck: *exists*

Me: nice Twilight (2008, dir. Catherine Hardwicke) reference

[antiship]

bella: so what's esme's vampire talent?

edward: [flashbacks through 80 years of desperately trying to block out the sound of esme sucking carlisle's brain out through his dick]

edward: ...her ability to Love Passionately