aParadoxFlawed

So, this one time, I caved to the social media gurus and made a Tumblr. This is that Tumblr.

[aparadoxflawed]

Oh, look. Someone who vaguely resembles @hobojohnson. Like, maybe a distant cousin, or a guy he met once in a poorly lit room and thought, “hmm, that dude kinda looks like me...” 🙃 • • • In other news, art is hard and sometimes you just gotta quit while you’re only sort of behind. It looks better in person than it does here. You’re just going to have to trust me on that. Swipe to see a gradual deprogression, if you’re into that sort of thing. • • • Also, I really want to quote Sex in the City in conjunction with this? Is that too much? Screw it, I’m gonna do it anyway. “So I’m not a baby maker looker, but maybe I am to a woman that really loves me for who I am. Or maybe who I’m not. Either way, it’s getting bothered and hot... Gross!” #ohgod #imsosorry #thishasgoneonlongenough #hobojohnson #hobojohnsonandthelovemakers #theriseofhobojohnson #listentothisalbum #youwontregretit #franklopes #hoboherd #sexinthecity #yourfaceilikethatshit #art #fanart #drawing #portrait #coloredpencils #imnotanartist #whydoidothistomyself #seriouslythough #italwayspissesmeoff (at Ontario, California)

[thequeenofhell]

WHY ARE PEOPLE NOT MORE EXCITED ABOUT SPACE. THERE IS A PLANET MADE COMPLETELY OUT OF DIAMONDS AND A HUGE ASS RAIN CLOUD FLOATING AROUND IN SPACE THAT IS SO FUCKING COOL.

[legolasofthewoodlandelves]

Don’t go to the planet made of diamonds. It’s not safe there.

[poolboydivision]

Don’t go to the planet made of diamonds. It’s not safe there.

[thursday]

[mjalti]

me: *crying in a fetal position in the bathtub*

the water: what’s up sis

me: there is no guarantee of anything, of any fulfillment we are at the absolute mercy of the projections our brain chemicals impose upon us–

water: I’m just ….gonna go back to being liquid ttyl

[tastefullyoffensive]

(via sizertl)

[kakkapyllypylly]

[super-affection]

what kind of snake is this

[toni-hiatus]

A vicious one

[emmatheward]

- Stimpy and Olive not being camera shy.

[lackyannie]

they look like a couple that defied all odds to be together.

[orisgallery]

EW cover shoot behind the scenes - cat-set 

[zzdigital]

What if someone got bitten by a vampire, but didn’t realize it. So then they go around and keep misidentifying all the symptoms, like

“Dude, you haven’t gone outside in a while.” “Yeah, last time I went out I got this wicked sunburn.”

“Are you still up?” “Yeah, I started bing watching this show on Netflix.”

“Dude, I’m seriously craving something right now.” “Like what?” “I dunno. Pizza rolls?”

[adriofthedead]

“Why is it that you never come into my house unless I invite you?” “Um, it’s called ‘being polite’…?”

[paulichu]

“I tried cooking with garlic the other night and got this serious burn on my hand. I think I’m allergic, but all I’m getting on Google is vampire bullshit.”

[samarajournal]

“Dude can a mirror like… stop working or something?”

[espeoradar]

“Dude, why do you keep posting pictures of the floor?” “…Those are meant to be selfies, I guess my camera must be broken.”

“Dude, I am all for you expressing your religious beliefs, but could you not wear your crucifix when I’m around? It really bugs me for some reason.”

[recondite-room]

“Have you ever noticed how cute bats are? like really noticed? sweet lil balls of fluff with wings man.”

[nickthepigeon]

“I want to sleep in a coffin…ya kno, for like… aesthetic”

[therightprometheanfire]

“What’s with your thing about necks lately?”

“MUST YOU KINKSHAME ME IN MY OWN HOME”

[hopetimistic]

“I looked up my symptoms on WebMD, and it says I have cancer.”

[okaynadine-null-deactivated2014]

i hope everybody who reblogged this wacky hilarious text post fails all their classes and finds themselves stuck in a dead-end minimum wage job for the rest of their life

i’m so very glad tumblr is popularizing poor work ethic and laziness. what a great thing. i guess that means more income for people who actually take their lives seriously

[nentindo-deactivated20210501]

[thetrippytrip]

This “rule” assumes that most women are liars and most men are rapists. Gross.

[lizzibennet]

important!!

[tateratots]

look at them

[elasticitymudflap]

reblog if ur proud of this chicken persuing a higher education

[yarter-deactivated20170523]

I post on Tumblr when I’m feeling depressed.

[yarter-deactivated20170523]

[naughtynatasha]

[quinzel-isley]

48 years ago a girl said “oh fuck me” to her best friend while walking in the street, a guy who randomly passed by answered by “let me at least buy you dinner first”. I present to you my grandparents, in love since then and celebrating their 47 years of marriage today.

[mybeltruns]

grandpa got game

[magicalmysterytardis]

so my mom bought me new shower gel and i use caress so they have weird names and this one is called ‘tempting whisper’

so i was like what?