When I learned the word liminal, I understood myself so much better.
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@aplusnormalhuman
When I learned the word liminal, I understood myself so much better.
You know that thing where you thought you were having a nice conversation with a cute and funny guy who thought you were cool, but then like a week later you realize that he only found you so interesting because he was explaining things to you and you were smiling while he did it? Mbleflerg.
Books I Read This Year
Hello, tumblr. It’s the most wonderful time of the year, when I get to list all the books I read last year and decide which ones I liked the most.
In 2015 I read a total of 103 books (including 11 rereads), the most I’ve read in a single year since about sophomore year of high school. Of those, 68 were young adult, middle grade, or children’s (25 of which I read for work*); 19 were adult fiction; 11 were graphic novels; and 5 were memoir, essays, or other nonfiction.
My favorite books this year were the Magicians Trilogy, The Glass Sentence/The Golden Specific, and Carry On. Full list below the cut.
My radiator smells weird and I think it’s just dusty (? Or possibly that mouse I saw in my living room the other day went behind it to die and what I’m smelling is its decaying body? Have I told you guys how much I love my new apartment?) but I’m afraid of using the vacuum when I’m home alone because the noise will cover up the sound of a murderer sneaking up on me, obviously.
--An example of the totally rational thoughts I have on a regular basis (Also, hi. Apparently I haven’t made a post in three months but I totally still exist.)
Buying saltines and ginger ale at Duane Reade and trying not to be totally obvious about the fact that you just threw up in a trash can on the subway platform.
I’m seeing a guy I like a lot, and when I was kissing him yesterday I just kept thinking, I want to make an honest woman of your chin, which I think is telling ... though of what I don’t know, other than that I have excellent taste in books.
Observations
Last weekend I went to Washington DC and then to Richmond, where I attended a children’s lit conference. Here are some things that I observed:
*I love New York, but I’ll say this for DC: they’ve really got the escalator stand-on-the-right-walk-on-the-left thing down.
*I stayed in a hotel room by myself for the first time, which was a singular experience of feeling unbelievably luxurious and also double-checking all drawers and behind-the-bed spaces for creepy things (none found).
*I also spend more money in a weekend than I usually spend in a month (not counting rent), so I guess that’s what luxury really means. Also ugggggh my bank account, etc.
*Now I kind of just want to go to grad school so I can talk about books all day (which, to be fair, is also what I do now, but in a different way).
*I should go out of town more often.
Things I Regret:
That I didn't take a gender and women's studies class in college.
That I didn't just get permanent retainers, because I obviously should have known I would never wear retainers after getting my braces off and now look at all my parents' money I've wasted.
That I didn't try harder to access an alternate timeline/parallel universe through that photo of James Joyce that winked at me once in a museum.
Are there any future techno-dystopia books (or movies, etc.) where our hero(ine) is valiantly trying to resist being absorbed into the system, and the villain is holding him/her off a bridge over a rushing (probs polluted with hazardous waste) river, holding some computer-y device up to their head, and the villain says, "You've got to sync or swim, baby" (and probably cackles maniacally)? Important, serious question for research purposes; please respond.
I had a dream last night that was just straight-up a depiction of all my anxieties and insecurities, not even cleverly disguised in layers of surrealism or anything. First I was waiting for a train that never came, and while I was waiting, my roommate took me aside and told me that I hadn't gotten the internship at her agency, that, in fact, her boss thought my resume was the very worst he had ever seen. Then a group of people from my old job came by and invited me to a party, but as soon as I got there, everyone I knew well was gone and I was stuck there with vague acquaintances and people I hadn't seen in months. I went to the bathroom and as soon as I stepped into the stall the toilet started flooding, and I went out and told my old boss and he told me it was my fault and I should deal with it myself. And then the boy I was sort of dating kept trying to touch me and I didn't want him to touch me in front of people, so he walked off and left me alone, and then I watched a boy I used to date making out with some other girl on the couch. Then we were all walking down the street and I didn't know who to talk to so I asked this other guy to introduce me to his girlfriend and he put his arm around me for too long and then his girlfriend looked at me like I was the worst, and I think that's where it ended, but it's been throwing me off all day.
Forgot I had this book ramble tucked away in my drafts:
Hey tumblr,
It’s been a while. My laptop died in December and I didn’t get a new one till now, and tumblr was too hard to read on my phone so I stopped, because I am a child of the revolution and also lazy.
If you care what’s been going on in my life (or even if you don’t), I’m gonna tell you: it’s been pretty rad. This winter kinda sucked, emotions-wise, but I’m feeling a lot better now. I’ve been at my fantasmawesome publishing job for about seven months now and I hang out with talented-ass editors and designers every day, and today I got to shake Sarah Dessen--YA author/hero of my childhood--’s hand and drink champagne from tiny plastic cups with her, and sometimes I can’t really believe my life is my life. I’ve written more in the past six months than I did in the three years before that. Plus I’ve got amazing friends and I live in my favorite place yet and I’ve started using the word “rad” again.
I also just started this side-tumblr: http://rossistheworst.tumblr.com, where I list all the terrible things Ross from Friends does in each episode as I rewatch, so if that interests you, be sure to stop by.
I’ve missed your social justice rants and screencaps and pictures of beautiful women, tumblr, truly. Glad to be back.
Xoxo,
Krista
Well, I didn't do anything I said I was going to do today, but I did clean my computer keyboard and break my enter key and superglue my pants to my leg, so that's good.
And now my space bar is sticky. Even better.
It's been a while since I've done a rambling book review, but I recently read King Dork Approximately, by Frank Portman, which comes out in December, and I have some Thoughts and Feelings about it. Said Ts and Fs (as Tom would say) are under the cut due to spoilers and some light feminist ranting.
Before reading King Dork Approximately, I reread King Dork, which I first read in 2008, and loved. Like, a lot. This time, however, I wasn't quite as into it, and a lot of that was because I was put off my Tom's sometimes merely misguided and sometimes incredibly gross approach to and opinions on women.
Aside from that, I came to the conclusion that yeah, Tom might not be "normal" by his definition, but he is a little bit of a sociopath (again, by his working definition of the word). As a sort of defense mechanism, he views everyone who doesn’t support him as subhuman, which leads to him not really thinking there are any consequences for treating them like shit (or, indeed, bashing their head with a rock and then walking away).
Though it's at moments such as the above head-bashing that we must remember how unreliable a narrator Tom is, and, I would argue, be aware that we’re not really supposed to believe anything he says, at least not without corroborating evidence. I don’t think even necessarily think we’re supposed to sympathize with Tom Henderson, our Holden-hating, Holden-like narrator, which I guess makes the next part a little more able to be rationalized.
So yeah, that takes us to the issue of Tom Henderson and the Ladies. In my reread, I was struck my the way Tom seems to view making out, etc., as a reward for a powerful vocabulary or for being in a band. Like girl only exist to be subtly manipulated into giving boys what they want (to this end, the entries in the glossary about "uncooperative females" are especially troubling).
Tom has the wrong or mistaken idea about almost everything, despite how much time he spends thinking about his ideas about things. But I do honestly hope, for my own sake as well as that of both boy and girl teen readers, that Portman is portraying Tom's attitude toward girls in this way in order to showcase the (sometimes destructive) idiocy of teenage boys, not to say that this is in any way how the real world works.
In King Dork Approximately, there were still some passages that bothered me, but it pleased me that all of the women "given" to Tom in the first book as a prize for being in a rock band or whatever (from his perspective, anyway) essentially dropped him in the dust, and overall I felt that the new girl characters had a lot going for them (obviously I super love the Female Robot, I mean, come on). And the narration seemed a little more self-aware (but in an unreliable way, naturally) of the fact that Tom sometimes thinks about girls (the world, everything) in a reductive and super biased way.
Overall, by the end of the novel, I think I'm willing to give Tom the benefit of the doubt and hope that when he stops being quite so young, quite so consumingly influenced by the music he listens to and his ideas of who or what he's supposed to be, and starts listening to thoughts that come from other people's heads instead of his own (it is encouraging that he reads the Robot's letters, and even the fact that he calls her "the Robot" I'm willing to see as cute rather than something more nefarious), he'll start to figure out (more than he already has) that the world doesn't owe him anything.
I know that it can be problematic, also, to feel that characters (or even books) should uphold some ideal view of how the world should work or what's right, instead of being a collection of flaws and problematic ideas mixed in with all the "good" stuff. (But I'm also aware that I don't want that to let people off the hook entirely just because I don't want to be thought of as touchy and uncool.)
But in the end, you know, I am usually willing to let myself be convinced of people's goodness. In the end, I can't help rooting for Tom despite his many faults, and I very much want to believe that he really did get his Sex Alliance Against Society. Because you've got to believe at some point, you know?
More like A Gentleman's Guide to Functional Polyamory and Some Light Sadomasochism, amiright?
The girls who just moved into the apartment next to mine are either shouting encouraging things to each other in an affirming, girl-power kind of way while dancing raucously to '80s pop hits, or else having really loud sex to a lot of '80s pop hits.
Either way, yes, good.
On a similar note:
Like four months ago, I finally read that Slate article on why adults shouldn't read young adult books, right on the heels of a conversation about what characterizes a young adult novel, and here are some ranty thoughts on the topic: