Apollo

multifandom god (archery, music and dance, truth and prophecy, healing and diseases, the Sun and light, poetry, and more)

[t00thpasteface]

Apollo's Prophecy Dodgeball is one of the best tumblr memes because nobody actually wants it to be a meme. we're all pleading for mercy and yet He continues to choose His oracles...

commission info - patreon - redbubble

[t00thpasteface]

every time i see the "someone added your gif to a post" notification in my activity, i know it's this gif, and i always think "well maybe it was a GOOD prediction this time!" it never is. it's always a bad prediction. well i'm the idiot who drew it and i say that from now on we all make good predictions about kittens and rainbows and marshmallows instead of taking turns larping as cassandra

[t00thpasteface]

you know what? i think apollo really came through for us lately. everybody say thank you apollo

[apollo]

No big deal, you are welcome

[noosferik]

can't wait for biden to resign from the campaign this sunday, july 21 2024

[noosferik]

I'm about to pass out

[hyperoperationfractallisation]

@apollo come on man

[apollo]

You are welcome

[charlesoberonn]

It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.

Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real

There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations

Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that

The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.

There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)

The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.

Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.

Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.

[charlesoberonn]

Everyone converting to Apollo worship in the notes.

[lightkrets312]

[apollo]

[pankendev]

toilet paper is soooo boring they should print comics and novels on there, or little motivational quotes. and coupons

[lucklesslavenders]

you're right! this one has some of my favorite manga printed on it

[pankendev]

once more apollo's dodgeball bounces off the wall to immediately hit me square in the fucking face

[apollo]

Absolutely let me out of this. I haven't had anything to do with this debauchery, you little ΒΔΕΩ

[startrek-by-secret]

Things that are going to happen in 2024 according to Star Trek:

1) the absolutely giant homeless-population of the USA (or was is just New York? Idk, I‘m from Europe) is going to start a civil-war fighting against the upper class and police.

2) Ireland is going to get united

[yusaofthedawn]

[apollo]

Oh there is my ball.

[error404vnotfound]

brb gonna make some memes this is how I cope

[error404vnotfound]

nationalist and independence parties to Pedro Sánchez if he wants to be president again:

[jv]

Wait let me call someone

[apollo]

[twitter-today]

Well, folks, Twitter is not so interesting these days anymore. I think after the few months of shock and awe, now we are going through the long tail of the slow platform death.

So, that being said, let me ask you:

Should I keep this blog Twitter-oriented and just post whenever something major happens, even if it takes months between posts, or should I start covering tech industry bullshit in general?

let's keep being @twitter-today

evolve to @tech-is-going-just-fine

Voting ended onJun 26, 2023

[twitter-today]

So twitter is not so interesting these days, uh? 😂

[apollo]

[thyrell]

just came up with a really good 4 word cooking horror story but idk if you guys are ready for it

[thyrell]

2 cups vanilla extract

[apollo]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Elon Musk bought Valve, the game company, and then showed up to my workplace so I roasted him so bad people made musical remixes of it. Then he got mad and tried to fight me but he tripped and fell flat on his face.

[jv]

I read the first sentence of this post without realising it was one-time-i-dreamt and I literally swore out loud.

Fuck, I get chills just to imagine it.

[minijeng]

I had the same reaction, "what Elon bought Valve??!??"

[apollo]

what the fuck? No, sorry, fuck no. No no no. No red ball for any of you. No. Not in a million years. Sickos.

[mitchipedia]

“Is there such a thing as accidental praxis? Because as much as I hate oligarchs, in a million years I could not have figured out a way to trick one to walk on stage and get booed for ten minutes straight by the proletariat.”

Speaking as a former comedian, it’ll be interesting to see how this plays out. Because … have you ever had 10,000 people hate you TO YOUR FACE before? Because I have. And humans aren’t wired for that.

I’d note that the 10,000 people hating me to my face were actually just stonily silent while I ate it on stage while opening for a musical act. And while I laughed it off after .. it was rough. And I’d been working for years at that point. But BOOING?!

And for a *narcissist*? Just saying – expect some serious whiplash crazy coming over the next week.

— John Rogers @jonrog1

h/t jwz

[apollo]

[androgynosaurus]

the other night I had a dream that I was watching a new episode of a TV show I like and my fave male character takes his shirt off and he's got clearly visible top surgery scars. Absolutely no preamble or foreshadowing in previous episodes that this guy was trans just. there they are. and I was so overwhelmed by emotion that I had to stop the episode and get up and jab my finger at them bc the people watching with me had no idea what I was crying about. for context we do not have a TV, but a school-style projector onto a blank wall. so here's an artist's rendition of what it looked like (and how it felt)

[androgynosaurus]

I am absolutely obsessed with people in the replies trying to tag Apollo, Greek God of prophecy, in an attempt to make this come true

[dawn-machine-official]

@apollo

[apollo]

Yeah?

Uh, ah. A prophecy, I see.

Here, have this:

[twitter-today]

Someone makes the Apollo prophecy ball for me, please.

[kingercainedaddyissues]

@apollo @apollo @apollo @apollo

[apollo]

Yes? You called?

Oh, a prophecy ball. Sure, here: