HALF AGONY / HALF HOPE

𝘪 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵, ── 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭

[archive-storytelers]

#storytelers, ind. selective, mutuals-only multimuse blog, featuring muses primarily from literature and sci-fi sources. primarily headcanon based. very plot-focused! blog intertwined with @owedfavors and @eclipscd / always accepting and encouraging memes! adored and grown by odette ( 29, gmt-3, she/her ).

this blog is currently on semi-hiatus! will drop sporadic replies according to my whims!

FEATURED MUSES OF THE MOMENT: taggie o'hara (rivals), clara oswald (doctor who), gwyneth berdara (acotar)

LINKS ── carrd / int. tracker / memes / @nursc

[archive-storytelers]

i realized today i made no updates on this blog regarding my activity. two weeks ago, my grandma passed away, and shortly after, there was another family death. i am slowly returning to tumblr, however, to make sure i don't get overwhelmed and randomly abandon things, i'm going to stay on @nursc exclusively for a little while longer and then hopefully return here soon!!

[blackbluecherryblossom]

don’t tell me i’m overthinking. i’m overfeeling and it’s not the same.

[movedtoknightfalling]

but not his mother. lucy's face darkens at john's words. it pains her to see him like this, to know he ever feels unwanted, unloved. it breaks her heart that he still has more pain to go through. more pain when he realises the truth, but she won't tell him. she's going to give him as much time as possible. ensure he knows how loved he is, how much she loves him, will never stop loving him.

she allows him to change the topic, even if it's to one that's barely any lighter than the last thought that crossed his mind. "then you don't have to worry about it. it won't happen again," she reassures him, her own smile reforming when his face softens at the mere sight of her. her laughter is light, eyes glancing to the pudding cup that she knows he'll have. she's got no cause for it, can't even reach for it if she wanted to. "the pudding cup's all yours, baby. i'm sure i can talk the nurses into getting us as many pudding cups as we want."

[archive-storytelers]

❛ confident, are we? ❜ soft words, eyes flickering shut. john wants to tease her. needle her as she so often does to him, about arrogance not being an attractive trait, but the words flicker out of focus, dissolving in the back of his throat with a sigh as he looks at her, the pain on his lower back making everything beyond their bubble hazy.

they must have given him the good pain meds. there is a logical thread he can follow from that; the extent of his injuries, how long his recovery might be, based on it, but he lets go of it. ❛ you could make a blind man buy a rainbow, ❜ he mumbles, nuzzling into the pillow, content to just be for the present. benton is gonna show up soon, and there will be no sighing and feeling sorry for himself then. ❛ a better pillow would be a nice start. ❜

[binarynines]

@storytelers (for Dawn)

Dinner at the Tyler house is winding down; there's the sound of idle chitchat throughout the house, dishes being scraped and loaded into the dishwasher, the kettle boiling. Jake leans against the kitchen doorway, doing his best to stay out of people's way while still being around to help ferry mugs of tea and coffee to their drinkers.

He knows he's not old, but bloody hell, does he feel like it when he sees Dawn and Chloe. It's okay. He's been through this with his nephew before. He knows how to talk with the youths.

"So," he says idly, trying to make conversation without doing that thing adults do where they have strong opinions about where your life is headed. "I'm going to ask, and you can tell me to shut it. Any plans for uni? I can give you loads of advice, but just on how to drop out." (Not entirely true; he made it into second year before he left. He has plenty of advice on lots of university subjects, so long as those subjects aren't academic.)

[archive-storytelers]

❛ i didn't know there were strategies on how to drop out, ❜ dawn says as she brushes past jake to grab the silverware from the table; short, measured steps, all the elegance of adulthood, with the still buck of youth, a springiness that peaks through only inside this household. ❛ i thought it was just a polite way of saying you were invited to remove yourself from the school grounds. ❜

which will not be her case. no, she has the next four years planned, and there is no time for plotting an escape, she made sure of it. ❛ merton college, economics. the same college my dad attended. ❜

[letsbelonelytogetherr]

— v, excerpts from a book i’ll never write #2 (via letsbelonelytogetherr)

[archive-storytelers]

@knightfalling

[eclipscd]

❛ no, no, no, ❜ she mirrors him — not even mockingly, though he'd have deserved it. ❛ but you just said I should know better than to listen to anything you say. period. blanket statement. not you should know better than to listen to me this time. ❜ none of which technically excluded his supposed misconstruing of the truth — but, really, what's his excuse today?

❛ do you never say what you mean? because, really, that's a terrible trait in a doctor. and still technically lying. though, it does make a lot of what you've said since we met make a whole lot more sense... ❜ lottie trails off, pretending to think back through past conversations cast in a new light.

[archive-storytelers]

abandoning his previous tactic in the face of defeat, julian pounces on an opening, building a new strategy on-the-fly. ❛ by that logic, if what i said was -- and i'm not agreeing what i ever said any of those words, to be clear -- and you are calling me a liar, wouldn't that mean that i always tell the truth? ❜

wasn't there something about psychologists not being allowed to use mind tricks on regular folks? well... probably not, but there should be, this was unfair! she got paid to yap!

[astraldestiny]

She simply stared at him for a moment, briefly wondering why she had continued this conversation with him for this long in the first place before finally responding with a deeply frustrated " Oh fuck off. "

[archive-storytelers]

❛⠀ language!⠀ ❜ clicking his tongue like a disappointed grandmother, head shaking just so from side to side, he had no other option but to chastise her. such language from a starfleet officer! what would the guidebooks say! ❛⠀ how does that make starfleet proud, huh? huh? i`m disappointed.⠀ ❜

[highly1ogical]

spock sighs. it seems almost pointless, but he supposes they need to know some personal things about each other to sell the plot. ❛ s'chn t'gai. ❜ vulcan syllables roll off his tongue easily, despite how infrequently he uses it these days.

spock has been engaged before, but things were much different then. a betrothal set up from childhood by his parents, with a woman he did not see much of after enlisting in starfleet. would things feel so stilted between them? conversation does not flow, at least from spock's side, but that doesn't seem to bother clara. she appears happy to speak for the both of them- a fact he finds himself grateful for now. he gives in to his previous argument, shifting more comfortably in his chair. ❛ i will answer your questions, if you have more. ❜

[archive-storytelers]

clara beams, the breadth smile taking her by surprise, as if she didn't fully expect him to tell her the truth. a dimpled smile that she doesn't destroy by tripping over the foreign syllables; it is tempting, echoing them back to him until she gets it just right, but she knows better than to crow about her victories.

one step forward, and three steps back, that's how these things usually go.

❛ ⠀expected worse, with how much fuss you were making,⠀ ❜ clara teases, with a click of her tongue. ❛ ⠀i'm going to hold you to that.⠀ ❜ he doesn't know what sort of beast he just woke up; there has never been a time in her life she doesn't have any questions. oh, she always thinks she knows best, that has nothing to do with how her eyes light up at the smallest hint of a mystery. ❛ ⠀okay, let's see. let's pretend we are on a first date, and you are being cagey, so i'm trying to loosen you up... i'd ask: pets, favorite movie and when you had your first kiss.⠀ ❜

[moxrglory]

“You misinterpret everything, even in silence” - Franz Kafka

[movedtoknightfalling]

for two decades now, lucy's had an inbuilt sense inside of her that tells her when john is close. he doesn't even have to make a sound and she knows where he is. they can be separated by walls and she'll still know when he's home and not. it's been even stronger of late as the walls that separated them feel thicker than ever before.

like when he'd come home from a late night shift and he'd been there outside the kitchen window, watching her bake into the early hours of the morning. her reaction had been delayed then, her attention caught up in the dozens of muffins she was baking for john to take in for his next er shift. she had to do something or else she'd feel even more purposeless watching everyone else do so much while she stayed at home. feeding the work colleagues who had become their family was the least she could do.

but now? her john radar is the strongest it's ever been, telling her that he's right there and she still refuses to look up. even as he asks her to. she's sniffling. most of the tears have stemmed their flow now, but she's still thinking of others before herself. john, who can't get sick, who's at risk by just being in the same room as her. she'd already brought it home once after one of her few grocery store trips. what if she passes it on? she can't. she won't.

but it's john. slowly her forehead emerges, then an eye, peeking up at her husband. she almost sobs again, seeing how close he is, the closest she's been to the love of her life, her soulmate, in too many months. she wants to throw herself into his arms. her hands twitch, she almost caves, but somehow manages to stay strong though the cracks in her visage are less cracks and open gaps by now.

"the kids... i said be with the kids." her voice is shaking, a terror and heartbreak behind her own eyes as she spoke. how could she have done this? what had she done? "j-jack. you need to be with jack. i-i... i'm fine. i can handle this. j-just go. help them."

[archive-storytelers]

the ground is scratchy underneath his knees. there is a faint smell of dust lingering in the room; must've been since the outbreak since they had someone come in and do a proper clean-up of the old house, not wanting to risk themselves or anyone else to clean an area they didn't use. it is also familiar. he remembers kneeling here, maybe not in this exact spot, but in this room, trying to build eliza's crib; succeeding only to realize the damn thing was too big to go through the doorway to the nursery and had to do it all over again.

he didn't mind the pain in his legs back then. nor does he mind it now, but he adjusts himself slightly, sitting down cross-legged in front of her, settling in for the long-haul. when she tries to pull away, he meets her, keeping her near, brown eyes patient and soft as they gaze down at her panicked ones.

❛ jack is fine. he's got eliza and charlotte got him. the kids got each other, and i got you. ❜ what jack truly was, was worried. all of their kids were worried about their mom, they tried to be strong, but he could see it in their searching looks towards the old house, the way they kept dragging him towards it, even as they held him; what they needed was for their mom to be okay.

as he speaks, his hands are never still. they drift up the length of her arms, up her back, and curling at the nape of her neck, brushing the blonde strands down and repeating the path in a slow cycle, just as he knows she likes it.

❛ i got you. you hear that? come here, can i hold you? please, luce, can i hold you? ❜ his voice breaks a bit at the end, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

[kingrising-moved]

mel allows an undecided hum to leave her lips as she considers frank's response. he might have two kids, but they're young. she's been watching the film for over two decades at this point. "maybe. i mean, they're kids, you've got that. but i don't know. i'm twenty-two years strong in watching elf. just wait until your kids find the film they never want to stop watching." despite herself, a huff of a laugh shakes mel's shoulders at the thought of bob newhart chasing frank with a candy cane. "he's papa elf. he wouldn't hurt you with it. just maybe make you lick the candy cane until you're sick?"

her brows raise in a note of surprise at his statement. she knows becca has taken a fondness to frank, he's perhaps the one who has taken the most time out of all her colleagues to talk to her sister the few times mel has brought her into the er or bumped into them elsewhere. "yeah? she did?" she's not quite sure what to make of it, fighting back a smile that wants to emerge. "well clearly she hasn't met dr metha yet. she'd love his jokes."

[archive-storytelers]

a shudder courses through him at the thought, his smile relaxing another inch.

❛ you putting a curse on me, king? ❜ when she follows up with a very insensible suggestion about how to deal with his nightmares, he is sure she's putting some sort of candy-cane shaped hex on him. ❛ oh, you are. ❜ either that, or she has some very interesting ideas he is going to have to dig into later. ❛ don't tell me you're one of those tiktok witches. ❜

frank presses the cool bottle against his chest, playing wounded, just to nod and agree with her. ❛ damn, you're right. you can never let them meet. ❜

another zinger rests on his lips, but just as he tilts his head, a bit closer to her than strictly necessary, robby slaps his hands and says he is done for the night, and he instead asks her about her favorite movie. ❛ so what was it? the one movie you could never stop watching? ❜

[kingrising-moved]

mel knows an order when she hears one. even in her own apartment. still, she listens to the command, sitting in the chair, but she's looking around quickly enough, sitting side-on the chair as she dangles an arm over the chair back to watch frank move about. it's incredible what two kids could do in a matter of hours, but there's no complaint on mel's lips. she knew they'd had fun and that's what mattered to her.

"oh, uh, the creepy one?" her eyes are scanning the room instantly, looking around for anything else that's out of place. she'd tidied up earlier that day, moving anything out of reach that wouldn't have been well placed in a child's hands. she's on her feet, rounding the small coffee table in search of the doll.

it might be creepy, but she knows what it's like to have a lost toy. she pauses in her search to glance at willow, the edge of a smile peeking through. "it can't be, but it must be. she hasn't moved since she fell asleep there... if you want to get the kids home, that's okay. i can find creepy doll and bring it over before they know it's gone."

[archive-storytelers]

frank leaned down to brush a strand of willow's hair away from her scrunched-up face. it struck him, for a moment, that this is the first time he has seen her asleep in weeks; he usually gets day-visits, his new apartment not yet ready for two kids traipsing around in the dark. ❛⠀mighty lucky they're so cute. what a mess,⠀❜ he repeats, stretching out, white shirt lifting an inch from his waist.

❛⠀where could it be... ⠀❜ resuming the search, he lifts pillows off the ground, putting them back on their correct place -- or as close as it can be, around the sleeping bodies, he lifts up his head when she starts speaking. the idea that mel is kicking him out of the apartment flits through one ear, and leaves through the other; if she wanted him out, she would have told him directly.

and, well... he is not going to rush out. not yet. he has been sharing auntie mel with the kids for the entire night, and maybe, just maybe, he wants some of her attention too.

a full sweep of the apartment reveals nothing, leading him back to where he started. knowing his girl, the doll is probably buried under her. ❛⠀i bet you five bucks it is under her.⠀❜

[kingsmemes]

「   RP MEME :   NONVERBAL PROMPTS.  mix of violent, caring, touching and non-touching prompts.  」     SEND PROMPT '+ REVERSE' for the inverse to happen. for example 'bandage + reverse' for the receiver to bandage wounds on the sender.

[ BANDAGE ] : sender bandages a wound on receiver.

[ GUIDE ] : sender puts a hand on he receiver's back to guide them somewhere.

[ WAVE ]: sender waves down receiver to get their attention.

[ SIGN ]: sender raises their hand to sign to receiver. what follows can be anything the sender desires.

[ LIFT ]: sender lifts receiver's chin to look at them.

[ LIGHT ]: sender lights receiver's cigarette/candle/etc.

[ FIND ] : sender finds receiver beaten and/or bloodied.

[ PIN ]: sender pins receiver against the wall during combat/sparring.

[ GET DOWN ]: sender tackles receiver out of the way of danger.

[ TAKE ]: sender takes a hit meant for receiver.

[ CAUGHT ]: sender finds receiver somewhere they aren't supposed to be.

[ TRAP ]: sender traps the receiver somewhere they don't want to be.

[ DARLING ]: sender touches receiver's cheek.

[ SNATCH ]: sender snatches receiver's wrist as they turn to go.

[ STAB ]: sender stabs receiver.

[ DRAG ]: sender drags receiver from point a to point b.

[ SIT ]: sender sits on receiver's lap.

[ EN GARDE ]: sender and receiver get into some kind of fight.

[ DRUNK ]: sender finds receiver drunk.

[ BLOOD ]: sender walks into receiver's room covered in blood.

[ FLOWER ]: sender offers a flower to receiver.

[ HOLD ]: sender reaches to hold receiver's hand.

[ BRUSH ]: sender brushes a strand of hair out of receiver's face.

[ NOTE: ] sender writes a note for receiver. the contents are whatever the sender decides.

[ EYES ]: sender notices receiver looking at them.

[ STOP ]: sender raises hand to signal the receiver to stop in place.

[ TAP ]: sender taps receiver on the shoulder to get their attention.

[ WAKE ]: sender gently wakes receiver from a nap or otherwise.

[ MORNING AFTER ]: sender and receiver wake up together for the first time after a night of passion.

[ BLANKET ]: sender drapes a blanket over receiver's shoulders.

[ HUDDLE ]: sender and receiver huddle together in an effort to stay warm.

[ TUG ]: sender pulls receiver away from them.

[ PUSH ]: sender pushes receiver away from them.

[ BULLET ]: sender shoots receiver in a non-lethal area.

[noahwhyle]

NOAH WYLE as DR. JOHN CARTER in ER (1994-2009) | 3.05 “Ghosts” (1996)

#its the way he didn’t let go of her hand throughout the episode for me

[fablelike]

falling into a familiar place besides him, gauze and antiseptic solution already in her practised hands, mary-jane gives the bruised hero crashing on her couch a fleeting warning glance. she's concerned for his safety, she knows first-hand how out of hand his rogue gallery can be, but hearing peter's non-chalance about this hunting maniac just evokes a sigh from her lips as she firmly presses a cleansing wad to the smaller cuts in his flesh first.

" you probably shouldn't encourage him to stick around, pete. " that's not exactly what he means, she knows that much, but her point still stands. the cloth wipes against his skin in a gentle downwards motion, her gaze checking his body for anything particularly brutal — and thank god, it's not too bad this time. no hospital required tonight. but for a moment, the first aid pauses ; her hand reaching to curl around peter's jaw and inviting him to look at her instead. a friendly smile on her lips solely for him... laced with that unspoken thing between them. " you're a total prize... just not in that way though. maybe i'll give kraven a piece of my mind and he'll finally back off? "

[archive-storytelers]

❛ we got different interpretations of encouragement, mary jane, ❜ peter mutters, no heat in his words, just lazy amusement. personally, he thought it was time one of the other superheroes in the city stepped up to take some weight off his shoulders; what even was storm's job? surely he could schedule a one-on-one fight with one of the city's weirdos in-between his lack of responsibilities.

he is so distracted in his musings, that he doesn't notice her shift. it is only at her touch, which he obeys oh so willingly, that his mind clears, and spider-man retreats to the back of his mind when his vision is completely filled by her. ❛ poor guy. i don't think he'd survive. ❜

❛ ah, maybe if i act real nice next time, he'll get bored. ❜

[fablelike]

her own face scrunches mockingly as the other passes by, mouthing clara's question mirroringly as if it were a stupid one. of course the little human had to ask the less important things like that, even though missy could — begrudgingly, and only to herself — admit that yes, the TARDIS did possess a great many number of distress signals. probably that idiot's idea of trying to help everyone, silly doctor. " oh? must've he? thank you so much for stating the obvious — ten points to you, sister ! " eyes lacking any of their usual mischief roll in open vexation, tired already of clara's... humanness. honestly, how he put up with these pathetic ants was beyond her.

boots click against the grated floor, hands resting against the console to control any urges that might make this little ship become too messy ; she stared across the mess of buttons and levers to fix their newfound companion with a predatory stare. it would be so easy to just... but no. like it or not, missy needed her help. " well then, now that we've solved that little mystery... what do you intend to do about it? " fingers drum a four-beat rhythm somewhat impatiently, metaphorically poking the other into action just to be able to sit back and watch the chaos. " sit on that little tush and doing nothing, are we? leaving our poor doctor to a fate unknown? why, clara... i didn't know you could be so sick and twisted like that. "

[archive-storytelers]

for a moment, clara considers what would be the quickest way to kill missy. actually, it is more than a moment; at least thirty-seconds are dedicated exclusively to running different scenarios, and how much the she-devil in purple would suffer in each one. alas, that would get in the way of saving the doctor. she'll just have to save her five-step plan to dump her in an exploding supernova, covered in ants, for a later date. ❛ it's called having a normal conversation, ❜ she snipes, under her breath. ❛ no, no. i think you must have confused me with someone else. ❜

fingers snap together, indicator pointing in her direction.

❛ i know, it is you! ❜

at the snap of her fingers, the controls in the console change and she steps in front of the computer, setting it up to track the doctor's signal. ❛ now start harping, and do something useful. ❜