[[before you expand: LONG text post!!]]
I got diagnosed only a couple months ago, but I have been practicing witchcraft for a little bit now. So in retrospect, here is stuff that I realized I have been doing to cope the whole time, and some new things I'm tinkering with :) Please feel free to leave your own tips or thoughts!
At all costs, avoid promising gods and spirits that YOU WILL uphold a rigid routine.
Just do not promise to give daily offerings! JUST DON'T DO IT. If you struggle with upholding a regular routine, do not promise gods or spirits you will uphold a routine for them. You should only promise things you are confident you can deliver. ((If you identify as a beginner witch it's my personal belief that you should not be promising anyone anything.))
Delete from your mindset that all witches are supposed to uphold rigid routines.
Give yourself breathing room: if you want to give scheduled offerings, maybe do one on the full moon. Or, plan it to coincide with other activities that interest you, and that you're likely to show up for.
Unless you have a few hours a week to devote to your practice, you should probably not be dedicating yourself to doing daily anything.
Rigid routine is not the only way to get regular experience with magic, build relationships with gods or spirits, or improve in your craft! You simply do not have to promise yourself or anyone else that you will do X actions at Y times.
Instead of having "do X for Y minutes on Z days" routines, try developing a streamlined ritual you can fit in anywhere for the really important stuff.
Maybe there are some really important things in your practice that you want to do on a regular basis. Maybe these are things like:
Acknowledging and honoring spirits
Instead of saying "I'll do shielding for 5 minutes every day after breakfast, then of course my offering ritual-", you can put a streamlined (short, easy) ritual together where you do all four of these things at once.
Deep breaths, acknowledge and honor the spirits, ask for assistance in raising a shield, offering excess raised energy to them, and praying for guidance in the upcoming task.
It should take maybe like, 2 minutes tops.
Then, slot this streamlined ritual in before most practice activities. Like:
Or, use it as a sort of 'generic' access point of connection and perform this ritual:
When you shower, to calm down from the day
When you're on transit to prepare for the upcoming day
When you're feeling grateful and want to share the moment with the spirits
When you're feeling sad and need support
Instead of forcing important actions into routines that may be hard to follow, find a way to carry these actions around with you in an accessible ritual, like carrying snacks around in a bag. This way you can use other exciting activities, or other life events, as a reminder to practice your ritual of important things :)
Build a clear system of omens for yourself. Omens can intrude on your daily life and get your attention.
Maybe you have alarm blindness, forget to do divination, forget to check in with spells - so asking for omens can be a huge help. They are spontaneous messages that catch your eye. Helpful!
Research omens in your magical tradition
Journal and brainstorm personal omens
Write out, for yourself, a short list of personal omens.
Solid black pigeons mean a spirit wants attention. Seeing your favorite tree species means a spell was successful. Three gray dots means a spell failed. The scent of cinnamon buns means fortune is headed your way.
Perform a ritual announcing your chosen omens to the Powers That Be. Invite those Powers, Yourself, Life, the Universe, and Everything to send you true, accurate, and helpful messages through these omens.
Working with omens in this way is a skill that evolves over time. Your personal omen system will evolve over time if you use it. Think of it as another form of divination!
(Tip: Combine symbols with colors for an advanced system that's easy to remember. Oak trees are prosperity, but black means slow movement, red means powerful, and white means failure. After a spell you see a plumbing truck with a red oak tree logo; powerful prosperity. Etc.)
Build all your spells, rituals, and everything with the foresight that you are probably going to forget about it or not return to it for a long time.
Encode retirement/shutdown functions into your spells!! Do you want the spell to burn out completely and leave the vessel hollow so you don't have to deal with the vessel later on? Specify that! Do you want the spell to go to 'power saver mode' and hibernate so you can save the vessel and recharge it later? Specify!
ENCODE OMENS INTO SPELLS TO REMIND YOU TO TAKE ACTIONS! "This spell brings me financial benefit, and when it runs low, I will see my omen of slow growth - a solid black tree."
Assume that you are going to completely forget that you're able to take care of this problem, so encode the spells assuming you will never remember to deal with this again:
Spell for people that will remember they want to deal with Monica (they will also be working with wards, divination, and subtle cunning):
"Stop Monica at the front desk from assaulting me with her dark energies, or else limit how much of her energy can reach me."
Spell for people that are going to completely forget this is an issue they can take care of and won't do another spell on it for maybe 18 months:
"Stop Monica from assaulting me with her dark energies, or reveal to everyone in the office her dark nature, but if neither of these things is possible, change something in the office so that we never interact again."
Assume you will forget about individual spells, that you will accumulate way to many spells than you can individually attend to, and that you may never take final steps like cleansing and deconstructing old spell vessels.
Build a spellcasting altar, or a spell recharging altar, where you store up all your vessels. Recharge them all at once, as often as you remember to.
Poor plan:
"And when this vessel runs down I will recharge it with the waxing moon as I stand under the orange tree-"
More tenable plan:
"And when this vessel runs down let it drink energy from my altar; let it take up any energy that suits it; let it feed on what is available to it, according to its needs."
Focus on learning how to tie spells to external energy sources so they will stay charged for way longer.
For easy deconstruction, set blanket conditions for every vessel that it be undone and the magic erased if you take a simple action. This is called a kill code. You bake it into spells and it makes deconstruction way easier.
Try developing a barbarous word of undoing and using it every time you want to undo a vessel or a spell; this word will gain power and can become very helpful in other ways.
Once again, plan spells with the foresight that it will be difficult/unlikely for you to re-engage for formal deconstruction procedures. So, anticipate your future needs during spellcasting: "And if I ever open this jar and take out the things inside it, let this spell be released and return to the earth, let it fade away without trouble and nourish anything around it as fallen logs nourish the forest floor." This way, you know that if you accidentally forget about a spell or just take it apart, the magic already has instructions to safely dissipate and you don't have to worry.
Develop a visual language to remind you of what collected objects and spell vessels are.
This folds in real nice with a personal omen system!!
Use a combination of colors, established symbols (planetary, alchemical), and personal symbols to develop a visual conlang that helps you keep track of what things are.
If applicable, decorate or modify spell vessels so you can tell at a glance what the spell is for (violet symbol of Venus next to a paw: a spell to improve relationships with the spirits that help you with psychism)
Build a system that makes intuitive sense to you, perhaps folding in with your color correspondence associations, magical headcannon, or any other mnemonic device:
All the spells in jars are protective
Everything that's tied into a witch's ladder is about prosperity
If it has a red X on it, that's a hex
If it has a 7-pointed star, it involves your dragon guide
If you store it in a bag that has blue on it (blue print, blue button, blue tie-string) then that object is related to cleansing
Your personal visual language will gain its own power over time if used regularly, in the way that egrigores or sigils can gain power if used consistently over time :) It can become a real magical tool, not just a mnemonic device!
During spirit work, just clearly communicate that your sporadic presence has nothing to do with your dedication 🤷
When you conjure/talk to/pray to gods, spirits, or anything, address the fact that your communication/rituals/etc ARE going to be sporadic. Explain yourself and ask the spirits to extend understanding.
Some spirits/gods/etc are going to demand regular routine. AND IF THEY EXPECT THAT, then you guys need to get on the same page ASAP as to whether or not that's possible.
Spirits can be incredibly forgiving and understanding, but unless you tell them why you are sometimes around and sometimes not, they do not necessarily know what's going on.
Your spirit guide may have not read the DSM-5. Obelon the Fox-Man might not be up-to-date with the 2025 diagnosis criteria for ADHD, and Obelon might not recognize that you are struggling with a disorder that can mimic inattentiveness. Obelon might be asking why you appear to be so enthusiastic, and yet only call for him once every 5 weeks.
Just explain!! Explain what you are comfortable explaining. Give them reassurances and ask them to not misinterpret your ability to be present.
At all costs, avoid making your path a carrot that you dangle in front of yourself to try and force yourself to fix your brain through sheer force of will.
If the way you talk to yourself about your path sounds like someone struggling with unhealthy dieting, maybe it's time to readjust.
"I just need to do my daily offerings, on schedule, for two weeks. Then I will have earned researching tarot spells."
Maybe it's not a good idea to intentionally include witchcraft in a cycle of reward and denial that will ultimately drain joy from the process until your passion is a withered husk.
Witchcraft isn't going to force your brain to change any more than Stardew Valley was going to force your brain to change. Or that time you got super into succulents. If your time spent studying wool quality in heritage European sheep breeds didn't cure your disorder, witchcraft won't either.
Witchcraft, I think, deserves to be something that is a part of your joy - not a part of a system of stressful attempts at making yourself into someone you're not because "real witches" all do such-and-such routine (I assure you, they do not) so you must force yourself to do it too.
(Incidentally, if you have a 'streamlined ritual for the important stuff' and it becomes a barrier that prevents you from practicing, then maybe that's not a good idea for you - or maybe it's not as simple and streamlined as you need it to be)
STOP trying to build a static path. Lean into temporary hyperfixations.
There is SO MUCH to learn in witchcraft. It's never-ending. The more you learn, the more doorways open for you with more things to learn behind them.
This is not college, you do not have to declare your major. You don't have to wait to decide on your 'magic specialization' before you start learning.
This is not college, you don't have to take semesters of boring general ed classes before you're allowed to start studying what interests you.
Unless you are getting into very serious initiations, learning stuff, advancing your skills, and building your path is not going to shut doors and prevent you from getting into something else.
If something excites your interests, GET INTO IT! Don't force yourself to ignore what you're passionate about because you think serious, responsible witchcraft is supposed to be rigid, boring, and tedious. (It isn't!)
Avoid declaring your major. As in, maybe the idea of energy glamours is super exciting, so on day 1 you create a lesson plan that will realistically take you 70 weeks to complete. Based on your history, is it reasonable that you will maintain this specific interest in glamours for over a year?
Avoid making lesson plans that intentionally slow you down and make shit boring for no good reason. If energy glamours interest you, are you (*scrolls up*) using energy glamours as a carrot to force yourself to engage in a tedious magical workout routine? Is the reason the lesson plan takes 70 weeks because you decided to spend weeks slowly moving through each phase so you have time to spam energy work exercises?
You know yourself better than I know you. Maybe wanting to slow down and engage in your focuses in a new way is the goal. Of course, listen to yourself first!
But if you have a temporary burst of energy and focus to learn a new skill, and learning that skill won't require you to make unhealthy personal or financial decisions, why not just lean into it and explore it moment by moment, wherever your interests take you?
I think you'd probably learn a lot more doing and undoing 20 glamours in a week, because you're freaking out about how fucking cool it is, than if you practice 1 basic glamor exercise once a day because that's what real disciplined witches do, and then 11 days later you forget it once and never do it again and now your interest has faded because glamouring is just another boring chore.
Invest some time and energy into figuring out exactly what your bare minimum of responsibility and upkeep actually is.
How often do you need to recharge your wards to keep them functioning normally?
Once you've explained your own needs and limits, how often do your spirits actually request offerings?
Are you 100% sure the spirits you're working with expect offerings in the first place?
Are those offerings expected to be physical, or do thoughts and prayers suffice?
How often should you perform a personal cleansing to keep yourself feeling magically refreshed?
Feeling anxious or guilty over whether or not you're supposed to be taking certain actions is NO FUN.
It is much less fun if you don't actually know how often you need to do these things. Then it's just all guessing, all the time, and nothing is ever good enough.
If at all possible, avoid putting yourself into a situation where you feel that you are supposed to be doing something responsible in your practice, but you're never sure exactly what it is.
Spend some practice time, learn some skills, and make notes, to discover whether or not you do have any minimum engagement requirements in the style of practice you want. And most importantly, having clear 'deadlines' so you don't have to keep guessing at what you're forgetting about this time.
