[aroclub]

i'm currently questIonIng my romantIc orIentatIon. I am almost sure i'm aromantIc but how can I know for sure I dont experIence romantIc attractIon

you may never know "for sure", anon! there's always the possibility that you may still experience it. i keep that open for myself, too -- that one day i may meet people who prompt that in me. i just don't think it's very likely, you know? and if you never have, up until this point, that trend might continue!

it's totally up to you. some people may see that identifying as aromantic "writes off" the possibility of being romantically involved; so if you'd rather keep that possibility open for yourself, then don't subscribe to that label. ;; that's okay.

but if you don't expect to end up falling in love, and you're okay with accepting that, i think the term aromantic can be really helpful and i think the community is pretty darn cool, honestly. :')

but there is no exact definition for what romantic attraction actually is... it's hard to pin down, since feelings vary from person to person. i usually look at it as the desire for monogamy and a more focused want of attention from one specific person? personally speaking there's a lot of people i want attention from and i some "romantic" actions, like holding hands and kissing and all, still appeal to me? but i don't want that like, single committment to one person, that really makes me uncomfortable. :c so.

it's up to how you feel anon, entirely, and if you'd like to talk about it more here, i'm happy to give you my impressions and i'm really honored you came to me to ask. i hope that helps, even the tiniest bit. but at the end of the day, it's whatever makes you the most comfortable, yeah? <3

[jjangsub10d]

Mostly it’s gone over well. There are people who don’t want to accept it, but I haven’t gotten any outright hatred/insults. Maybe it’s the people I’m around, but for me when people disagree, they stay pretty quiet about it around me. I do have some friends that would sometimes say, “oh, you’ll end up getting married, I’m sure” (and they wouldn’t say this often, just take me by surprise once in a while), but it only takes a couple of months for them to give up on that. Now the same friends can openly acknowledge and accept it, so that’s pretty awesome. :D That’s a good result of me coming out about it. I’m certain there are people around me who know and still don’t believe that aromanticism (hah, still wondering if that’s the proper term) is real, but since they’re not forcing their opinions on me, it’s not difficult to deal with.

I do think visibility is important, but not more important than an individual’s experience. If others not accepting a person’s orientation is something they think they won’t be able to handle, the person shouldn’t risk it.

There are good and bad points to a community working together for visibility. For one, it can cause people to put themselves at risk when they shouldn’t by coming out before they’re ready. On the other hand, we can see that it has brought the ace community pretty far. Without that focus, I probably still wouldn’t know that I’m ace, and if I didn’t know that then I wouldn’t know I am aro. I think as a whole, the aro community shouldn’t focus on visibility, but aros individually and in small groups can focus on it. The aim of visibility in the ace community, in my opinion, is given too much importance, but maybe not enough in the aro community.

this turned out way too long. ><

[aroclub]

WOW WHOOPS SORRY I replied on the wrong blog gosh I haven't made that mistake yet haha. ;(

BUT.

I gotcha, yeah. :> I’m glad it’s a fairly easy situation for you to work within, and that you can refute people’s dissent pretty well, t sounds like? Or at least shrug it off. ;; Thrilling to hear there are some of them who are really positive about it, too!! (I use aromanticism as a term, too, but I’m not sure it’s official either haha. We could make it official, though! Or at least “widely accepted” lol.)

I agree entirely with everything else there, for sure, I think. I dunno, it’s kind of hard to say because there’s still, for me, the lingering question of whether or not the aspectrum belongs in the queer community. For the most part, I think we do — though seen some people say that heteromantic asexuals aren’t really queer, and I dunno if it’s my place to argue with. I’d like to believe aromanticism IS queer, though. But even then, we don’t struggle for the same rights as other queer groups, since it’s not about gaining the ability to marry the person we want to in most cases, but more acknowledgment and respect.

So I do think, yeah, maybe there are bigger goals the asexuality and aromantic awareness, but I don’t think that dispelling this societal notion of “everyone needs a romantic relationship to be happy” is going to HURT anybody, romantic OR aromantic — because that mindset damages so many people’s self-images growing up and all, and even later in life. ):

Never too long! That’s the idea behind discussion!

[aroclub]

newblooded answered your question: I’m putting this up as a photo because then people...

I’ve only told two friends. I don’t think telling family is important to me at this point. I’ve done a presentation on aros/aces before too.

Awesome, in regards to the presentation -- where, if I may ask? o: How did it go over?

[aroclub]

stepstothesea answered your question: I’m putting this up as a photo because then people...

I’ve told a lot of people, actually. Maybe b/c I’m also in the ace community where visibility is seen as really important.

That makes sense! Do you mind sharing how it went over? And if you don't mind me asking, do you agree with the idea that visibility is really important? Is that something the aromantic community should be striving for, too?

[aroclub]

I'm putting this up as a photo because then people can reblog it, yeah, and comment? :o

This is a really great one, I think. I've made it pretty public on Tumblr and all, so any of my friends that have me added from in-person stuff know, and all my online friends do. I don't think I would go and tell everybody immediately, though? I went to a football game with a friend a while back and told her, then, actually, and she was very supportive about it in every way, very reassuring and kind, so. It definitely depends on the person. ;;

My Mom and my aunt know, my Mom took it really poorly at first but I've been continually communicating with her about it and making good points and such and she's, not quite an "ally" I wouldn't say haha, but she's supportive and understanding now, at least. My aunt was a surprise, though, because I mentioned being asexual as well and she was like, "there's a word for that?" because she'd experienced that her whole life! My Dad doesn't know, nor do any of the other members of my family that I'm close with, and I don't know when, if ever, I'll get around to that, but. ): It can work out, I think, surprisingly well, but I agree that it could also make things really uncomfortable, so. :c

What about you guys? o: Just friends? Family? Is it even necessary?

[aroclub]

I think using this blog to start discussion topics would be really awesome, but I can't think of any right now. :( I don't want to put all that trouble on to you, either. If I think of anything, I'll definitely pass it on to you.

I don’t mind taking responsibility for coming up with a topic, especially at first — I would LOVE suggestions, just to have you guys participate and all, so it doesn’t feel so regimented? But if people are interested in some discussion, I can definitely come up with at LEAST the first topic haha.

I’d love to hear if you do come up with anything, though!

[aroclub]

Hi guys! :) It's been a really long time since I've updated here and I want to give everybody an apology for that -- I was away from home for about a month and kind of on vacation so to speak, so I dropped the ball there, and I'm sorry. ):

Lately I've been really missing discussion about the aromantic spectrum and all, so it seemed like a good opportunity to remind everybody that you guys can always submit profiles to this blog if you want to introduce yourself, or we can always start up some discussion amongst the community -- whatever sounds good, really. If nobody wants to, too, that's cool! But we still have quite a few followers, so I thought I'd put the idea out there.

I hope everyone's doing well, and please lemme know if there's anything in specific you'd like to see from this blog -- it had a vague purpose from the beginning, just to form bonds and chat some, so! I'm totally willing to facilitate and even start topics here, maybe about characters in some forms of media we view as aromantic? Maybe even just sharing stories about aromantic related experiences haha, like telling friends and family and whatnot. :>

[aroclub]

Hey, : ).

I'm a 16 years old who uses female pronouns and while I do identify as a female, I don't really think I fit the 'box' perfectly for a reason or another. I'm an aromantic asexual but the label is just a few months old. I'm not really interested in romance or any sexual activity (in fact, I'm pretty repulsed by it) but I am hoping to have a platonic relationship with someone. : )

It's pretty obvious but I use a lot but a lot of smileys because it's a way to express my words and to make sure the other person understands exactly how I am 'saying' it. My native language is not English, I live in Europe, Portugal to be more specific, and I'm still in high school but with hopes of going to college. I would also love to become a published writer if only as a hobby. 

Now, a little more about me... (God, this is hard...) I love learning new languages, absolutely love reading and writing fiction (especially writing), music is my passion (especially Vocaloids), and... some more. : ) I don't really see much national TV (actually hate it...) but I do watch some series over the internet.

And now I'm finishing because, due to my habit of writing fiction, whenever I start writing, I can never seem to stop... Stopping now. : )

[aroclub]

Hi guys! (: We have some more new followers, so I'd like to reiterate that it's cool at any moment to send in a profile, which is just a rough description of yourself -- as lengthy and detailed as you'd like it to be! The submit's still open for that. (:

I'm glad to see some of you guys have still been talking amongst yourselves today, I'll get to my replies tomorrow, and I hope you're all having a good time! ;_; I'll update the list of profiles tonight though, for everyone's convenience.

[aroclub]

I don't really know if I'm submitting this right. Haiya I'm Leanne or Ran. I currently live in Tokyo, Japan and the picture above is me and a delicious can of Fanta melon soda which I love. I identify as aromantic and asexual and I prefer female pronouns. I'm actually quite new to the whole aro/ace thing and actually just realized I was so in March of this year. Unfortunately sometimes I feel like I'm worse off knowing I'm aro/ace because I notice how much pressure there is to form romantic relationships. I currently have a super cuddly platonic lover whom I'm very happy with!

Interest wise I like BL/yaoi (roleplaying is like 90% of my life, seriously) , nico video singers/Utaite aka. Vocaloid cover singers, manga and anime (my fav right now is Kuroko no Basuke), KAMEN RIDERRRR!!, and uh lots of other things I guess. I'm 20 and I'm currently a university student studying photography and economics. I have a passion for Ball jointed dolls/BJD's and I have two of my own. 

Oh and I also love kpop and I love it when people introduce me to new songs/bands! 

[aroclub]

Saaaaalutations, all.

Ehlo, ehlo. I'm Rebecca (Ree works too), and I hail from the USA. Four months shy of 17 and itching to get out of high school. I've been thinking about my romantic orientation for the past two years or so and, though I'm not sure where I fall on the spectrum, I currently identify as aromantic with lithromantic tendencies.

(yeah I know it's a little eccentric. if you want me to elaborate, please, feel free to ask, no?)

I am interested in romance (and a few others here are as well, I believe), mostly because I am curious as to what causes the feelings behind it. I like talking to non-aromantic folk about their romantic experiences and/or feelings in attempts to understand them better. 

My sexual orientation is somewhat dubious, but for practical purposes I go with heterosexual and celibate. I have no intentions of having a partner, be it platonic or sexual.

I'm heavily interested in languages and linguistics and I'm currently in my fifth year of Spanish classes and my second of Chinese.

Regarding fandom nonsense, I've been consumed with the kpop biz for the past two years (psssst stepstothesea!! hello!!)  and the kpop fandoms (primarily the shawol faction) are the only ones I'm currently active in. I have recently taken an interest in jpop as well, and I'm looking into it more often. I'm a non-involved Marvel fan (X-men, Avengers, Runaways, you name it) and a watcher of ATLA, Supernatural and BBC's Sherlock. I haven't read much manga or seen much anime, but I have read and watched both Kuroshitsuji and No.6. I'm a dog person and own a hyperactive mutt with whom I share a love-hate relationship.

Aaaaaand that's about it, I suppose. I look forward to talking with everyone!

[aroclub]

This is the last thing I'll bug you guys with tonight haha, but I changed it around so that the profiles link on the sidebar to the blog goes to this page -- which I figured would be easier, since this theme doesn't seem to have a next page button? (I'll fix that or change the theme sometime later.) 

That page lists everyone's URL and each URL links to your profile post for convenience.

At this point I think it's a good idea to just go back and check your post and see if anyone's replied, LOL... I'm in the process of finishing up replying to everyone's at least once, I think. (: That's all! Hope you guys are having a good time, and more profiles are accepted at any time! :D

[aroclub]

MAN I LIKE PICTURES SO I AM GONNA POST A PICTURE AM I ALLOWED TO POST PICTURES??

My name is Haley and I’m a grey-aromantic(?) pansexual! I’m genderfluid so you can call me she/he/whatever, but for all practical purposes, people refer to me as female and use female pronouns. I’ll be 21 in February. I’m still unsure if I’m flat out aromantic or just grey. I’ve been in two relationships, but in both cases it was me being more of a caretaker I felt like more than a partner and I didn't really like them that much. For the longest time I considered myself asexual, but I didn’t know what aromanticism was at the time, and I think that is a more suitable label for myself.  As for things I like… I have a lot of fandom interests, but Homestuck, Pokemon, Adventure Time, Persona, and the Fate series are my favorites right now. I also WOW I REALLY LOVE TO COSPLAY but I don’t consider myself very good at it. I love making things like jewelry as well! If you want to sum me up in three words; I LOVE BIRDS. I keep track of the different wild species I’ve seen (it’s in the 70s) and I used to volunteer at a wildlife clinic to take care of birds specifically. I like just about everything. Science, languages, history, etc. I just in general love learning. I’m still trying to figure out what I’m going to do with my life. I’m really easily excited!!!!! I’ve lived in a lot of places including Iowa, Wisconsin, Michigan, and Japan! And traveling is just something I have done a lot/want to continue doing.

This is a more accurate picture of myself on a daily basis but I couldn't resist posting a pretty one too because that's one of my favorite pictures of myself and I never use it for anything.

SO HI! :D If you'd like to talk to me via skype or some other medium rather than tumblr, just send me an ask or something.

[aroclub]

hey, my name's rise and i'm a garden variety teenage aro ace that likes female pronouns.

i've identified as asexual for a couple of years now; when i first started doing so, i only had a vague grasp on what it actually meant (and it's actually kind of embarrassing, looking back). once i started reading up on it more i felt more and more comfortable with that. i've only identified as aromantic since the beginning of this year -- i'd cycled through a lot of different labels, probably because i didn't really want to admit it to myself, i guess, until finally just coming to terms with it and feeling comfortable. man, past me is really pretty absurd.

i like falcom games (ys and kiseki specifically though i've started branching out into some of their other stuff recently), the mother/earthbound series, xenoblade, shin megami tensei, and homestuck. this blog mostly consists of me complaining about things or talking about games; more fandom related stuff goes on this blog.

this is pretty exciting, and i look forward to seeing where it goes.

[aroclub]

I'm really floored by how many of you have decided to submit something, especially so quickly. D: I'm a little busy tonight, so I don't think I can get to replies for everyone right now since I have to do some studying, but I'm interested in talking to every single one of you and will probably send you all fanmail at some point! (:

I'll monitor my inbox, though, and keep publishing things as I get them, so you guys can talk amongst yourselves if you want! Thanks a ton, everyone. <3 I hope this can be a really fun blog, and maybe in the future we can all some kind of event thing, too, even if it's just like, a chatroom or something haha. (:

[aroclub]

I'm Rachel. I'm 19 and am studying chemistry and psychology at William & Mary. My fandoms are Harry Potter, Supernatural, Firefly, Sherlock, Avengers - pretty much all the sci-fi/fantasy series except for Merlin and Doctor Who. I also write sarcastic book analyses and am working on a musical.

I started identifying as aromantic about a year ago, when I got into Tumblr more heavily. Before I found there were others like me, I wondered what was wrong with me. Unlike most other aros, it seems, I'm not entirely sure about my sexuality. I'm either ace or straight, but I'm still trying to figure out separating libido from attraction. I've never had a relationship - last year I thought I'd try for the sake of saying I did it, but the three times I tried to go on a date, I got stood up, so I just stopped trying.

 I'm not "out", for lack of a better word, because of a lot of reasons I won't go into here because this is getting long. So...uh...congrats on being the first group of people I told, I guess. :P

Hit me up here, if you have any questions or just want to know me better. I'm always up for making new internet friends. :)

[aroclub]

Hi there. My name's Sam, I'm an aromantic grey-ace teenage boy living in the middle of nowhere, and I run Aromantic Aardvark as well as AroPlane. I'm very interested in aromantic visibility and I'm happy to see more things like this cropping up! 

For things I'm interested in, I like writing, reading, Ancient Greece/Rome, Homestuck, the works of Vladimir Nabokov, Neil Gaiman, paganism, and various other things. My blog mostly consists of those things, and also a whole lot of social justice stuff and me ranting. 

I'm willing to make friends/talk to anyone who contacts me, so feel free to leave me an ask or what have you if I sound interesting at all! This is my blog