Mr Pickles just LOVES questions...

A gratuitous "ask blog" for Nightmare Dork University's Proto.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

*pokes with a stick to see if your alive* .______.

Ah-haha! Hello! Excuse me I was taking a very long, very amnesiac nap. Hello, my pale friend. How are you? *Pickles yawns* Pickles yawned as well.

[ask-a-pale-experiment]

“I’m doing better now that I know I won’t have to plan your funeral.”

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

You wouldn’t have to do that anyway, I have meticulously crafted my “death day” ceremony over the years, and none of it shall go amiss.

May I ask how you came across my humble blog, pale friend?

[ask-a-pale-experiment]

Uhhh…. hold on, I’m trying to remember…. oh right!! I wanted to ask you if you would like Mr.pickles to be alive! So I went through several ferret posts and now here I am!

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

Ahhh, well, Pickles is very much alive already! Well, this Pickles is. Pickles VI- Sixles- and she is very … physically alive. Though if you meant “spiritually” she would benefit greatly, I believe, from maybe some travelling or sky-diving. Really get the blood going!

[ask-a-pale-experiment]

Er…. would her heart be able to handle it though?

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

A good friend of mine continues to tell me “don’t let your dreams just be your dreams”. Besides, it’s what Pickles wants! She wants to try bull riding but I won’t have any of that, it’s a cruel sport.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

*pokes with a stick to see if your alive* .______.

Ah-haha! Hello! Excuse me I was taking a very long, very amnesiac nap. Hello, my pale friend. How are you? *Pickles yawns* Pickles yawned as well.

[ask-a-pale-experiment]

“I’m doing better now that I know I won’t have to plan your funeral.”

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

You wouldn’t have to do that anyway, I have meticulously crafted my “death day” ceremony over the years, and none of it shall go amiss.

May I ask how you came across my humble blog, pale friend?

[ask-a-pale-experiment]

Uhhh…. hold on, I’m trying to remember…. oh right!! I wanted to ask you if you would like Mr.pickles to be alive! So I went through several ferret posts and now here I am!

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

Ahhh, well, Pickles is very much alive already! Well, this Pickles is. Pickles VI- Sixles- and she is very ... physically alive. Though if you meant “spiritually” she would benefit greatly, I believe, from maybe some travelling or sky-diving. Really get the blood going!

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

*pokes with a stick to see if your alive* .______.

Ah-haha! Hello! Excuse me I was taking a very long, very amnesiac nap. Hello, my pale friend. How are you? *Pickles yawns* Pickles yawned as well.

[ask-a-pale-experiment]

“I’m doing better now that I know I won’t have to plan your funeral.”

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

You wouldn’t have to do that anyway, I have meticulously crafted my “death day” ceremony over the years, and none of it shall go amiss.

May I ask how you came across my humble blog, pale friend?

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

*pokes with a stick to see if your alive* .______.

Ah-haha! Hello! Excuse me I was taking a very long, very amnesiac nap. Hello, my pale friend. How are you? *Pickles yawns* Pickles yawned as well.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

In honour of the recent NDU showing up on my dash... have some YearsGoneBy Proto sketches.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

I missed you, too! Can you answer #26: "My biggest pet peeves"?

Hello, my lovely gerbilious friend! (I have actually fooled spell-check into thinking that that is a word.)Hmm, my biggest pet peeves, eh? Well, there isn’t much that truly bothers me... 

Except, perhaps... People who don’t use their turn signals quite bother me... People who do not text in complete sentences... Birds who run away from me when I try to feed them... Litter... Overly-aggressive Jehovah’s Witnesses... People who shield their children when I walk past them on the sidewalk... Commercials before movies... Dogs walked using their collars as a point of anchoring... Jellyfish... Road salt... White-washing... PLASTIC UTENSILS- SPITTING- LOUD NOISES-!

So, I don’t actually have too many “pet peeves”, no. I am very happy, unflappable individual. 

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

16. I'll love you if _______

What a syntactically confusing question... Or, rather, what is it actually asking? Is it asking if I will love YOU if somethingsomething? Or is it asking if you would love ME if I somethingsomething? Well, here's both: I will love you if you continue to be my loyalest Eyetooth and continue to ask me questions. (But I would love you even if you don't. 😌)You will love me if I will felt you a Tarminator made of real pug fur AND mail it up north. Is this true?

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

38. Childhood career choice?

Hm, probably a functioning etymologist-entomologist. The verbs and the bees~ Or, I don't know, a fireman or something banal like that. Children change their aspirations every day; I was once a children.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

Number 43: sexiest person that comes to mind? :)

Mmm, I don't want to make this too overt, so I'll give you my more classical opinion: Marlene Dietrich. Her cheekbones, her voice, her pre-postmodern androgyny and defiance of gender roles-! Excuse me, I have to go listen to Der Blonde Engel very loudly in my room. With the door locked.

[ihadagoldthrone]

Wanna be nosy… here’s your chance.

0:Height 1:Virgin? 2:Shoe size 3:Do you smoke? 4:Do you drink? 5:Do you take drugs? 6:Age you get mistaken for 7:Have tattoos? 8:Want any tattoos? 9:Got any piercings? 10:Want any piercings? 11:Best friend? 12:Relationship status 13:Biggest turn ons 14:Biggest turn offs 15:Favorite movie 16:I’ll love you if 17:Someone you miss 18:Most traumatic experience 19:A fact about your personality 20:What I hate most about myself 21:What I love most about myself 22:What I want to be when I get older 23:My relationship with my sibling(s) 24:My relationship with my parent(s) 25:My idea of a perfect date 26:My biggest pet peeves 27:A description of the girl/boy I like 28:A description of the person I dislike the most 29:A reason I’ve lied to a friend 30:What I hate the most about work/school 31:What your last text message says 32:What words upset me the most 33:What words make me feel the best about myself 34:What I find attractive in women 35:What I find attractive in men 36:Where I would like to live 37:One of my insecurities 38:My childhood career choice 39:My favorite ice cream flavor 40:Who wish I could be 41:Where I want to be right now 42:The last thing I ate 43:Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately 44:A random fact about anything

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

Go on, little ones. I have missed you so.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

I think if any of the blacks were to get married, you should be the one to wed them.

Ah, ‘twould be an honour. I did perform the ceremony for Tarmninator and Mr Pickles, after all! Could a human wedding be so different?(Alas, I have been told by a sort of ‘seer’ that I myself will one day marry a Black, and sadly I cannot officiate my own marriage…)

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

Poinsettia and Azalea

POINSETTIA: Favorite holiday dish?

Ah, next to pineapple bread pudding… I really like Christmas and Easter wafers that Catholics seem fond of eating. UuU They taste like fake.AZALEA: What’s a movie you cried while watching?

Tch, well~ Blackfish was awfully sad, though I maintain that whales are terrible people. 

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

Daffodil: What's the most thoughtful present you've ever received?

Ahh, that’s tricky… as self-pitying as this sounds, not many people seem to pay that much attention. Jack bought me a book of crossword puzzles last Christmas… He is a sweet boy.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

YAYYYY FLOWERS! *__* How about Primrose, Tulip and Myrtle, Uncle Proto?

PRIMROSE: Favorite kind of soup?

Pumpkin bisque, made with almond milk. Mmmm….

TULIP: For your birthday, what kind of cake do you ask for?

An embarrassingly simple marble cake. 

MYRTLE: Do you like going on airplanes?

Ah, I prefer the airport to the airplane itself, but… yes, I quite like flying.

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

Allium and Poinsettia.

ALLIUM: What’s the best thing you can cook?

Hmm, when I cook with meat I tend to do better with white, so I would say saffron-lavender chicken with basmati rice and asparagus. But when I cook vegetarian or vegan, I enjoy my own medley of quinoa, chickpeas and tomatoes, with braised yam slices.

POINSETTIA: Favorite holiday dish?

Pineapple bread pudding~ 

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

✿ send me a floral question ✿

Carnation: If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer?

Jasmine: What color looks best on you?

Allium: What's the best thing you can cook?

Orange Blossom: If you could pick the gender and appearance of your child, would you?

Calla Lily: If you died right now, what song would you want to play at your funeral?

Poinsettia: Favorite holiday dish?

Oxlip: Would you ever get into a long distance relationship?

Primrose: Favorite kind of soup?

Daffodil: What's the most thoughtful present you've ever received?

Rose: Are you currently in love with someone?

Amsonia: Would you ever become a vegan?

Peony: What's your favorite hot beverage?

Tulip: For your birthday, what kind of cake do you ask for?

Myrtle: Do you like going on airplanes?

Hibiscus: Did you ever play an instrument? If so what?

Zinnia: Who was your best friend when you were six years old?

Poppy: What color was your childhood home?

Hydrangea: Starbucks order?

Violet: Do you like where you're from?

Locust: What was your favorite book as a child?

Rhododendron: What's the scariest dream you've ever had?

Magnolia: Favorite kind of candy?

Aster: Would you rather be cold or hot?

Marigold: Do you listen to what's on the radio?

Heliconia: Do you like when it rains?

Azalea: What's a movie you cried while watching?

Dandelion: Do you think you're important?

((Ooc: this would make my night, please.))

[ask-proto-and-pickles]

What'd you do for April Fools Day?

Perhaps I should wait to reveal my secrets until all of my 'pranks' have been realised…