Letters From The Lord Of Gifts

👁 He sees you when you're sleeping 🎶 He sees when you're awake 🎶 He sees everything 👁 (Inbox of Lord Annatar for all your gift requests)

[ask-santatar]

Welcome To The Lord Of Gifts Annatar’s Naughty List

Have you ever wanted an extra occasion to get spoiled? A social obligation to hang out with your relatives so you can brag about stuff a stranger gave you out of reads scribbled writing on his hand the kindness of his heart? Do you envy those celebrations like that “Christmas” they seem to have in lands so alien and far from your Shire or Dale or Citadel? Well, then you might want to consider welcoming your new dark overlord- ahem İ mean, Lord of Gifts Annatar*!

A carefully penned list of who among you is undeserving of presents from any respectable winter solstice festivity-related figure out there (and thus more than deserving of my attention) is already underway, so don’t hesitate sending your precious little letters over! Just be careful what you wish for though 👁

* Ignore the various instances of Santatar on the contact info, the Yule Orcs are now working on fixing their mispellings.

[janeypievanas]

Our favorite photo from when I was trying to get a Christmas-card worthy photo.

[ask-santatar]

PSA

We deeply apologize for the sorry state of our festive endeavours. Our all seeing evil overlord has been taken by a sort of festivity blues, sapping him of all enthusiasm.

Of course, that reflected on the overall energy of the project, especially because of the numbers lost to His foul mood, leaving us ever more understaffed. We would very much like to encourage everyone to lend a hand or two before its too late.*

(As usual, letters and requests are most appreciated. The inbox address has not changed. We'll try our worst to keep it functioning.)

* caution: lent hands are not guaranteed to be returned.

[ask-santatar]

Festivities are coming to a close even for the last of you out there and, while it pains me to say farewell to the bustling and productive atmosphere Mordor has seen these days, İ can only rejoice thinking of finally getting myself some well-deserved rest.

Of course it is not that İ will ever tear my Eye away from any of you, but maybe – just maybe – İ will have the time and quiet to do so from Mordor's famed luxury spa resort, Nen Singremborn, for a while. Salt and lava baths do wonders for both husk and spirit, and are sorely needed after the end of this year's endeavour. İ shall perhaps consider this a gift to myself? 👁

Be generously evil, make me proud. Unless something that requires a Gift Lord comes up in the meantime, İ will See you in some months.

[cinnasscribbles]

Happy Christmas to those who celebrate, from the Lord of Gifts and his Elven companion! There’s definitely nothing suspicious in that box.

[ask-santatar]

Well, would you look at that! It's not often such an on point representation of yours truly starting out his successful career makes its way on my dash 👁 ah, those were the days!

[ask-santatar]

Dear New Boss, thank you so much for making my wish come true and having the femur of my ex-boss delivered right to my porch by giant crows. Classiest shit I ever saw, sir! I also wanted to confirm that I got my shift schedule and can't wait to start the new job. This is gonna be sweeeet.

My my, welcome aboard! İ'm glad you appreciated the gift, too.

Now all İ ask of you is to put all of your energy in your new role and spread the word of my magnificence and generosity 👁

[ask-santatar]

People of Middle Earth who celebrate Amanar in its many forms, it is my pleasure to wish you a great day! Open the presents İ delivered, try the jewelry on (İ'm especially proud of those), let me know what you think of it. Then go out, show it off, boost my followingAhem İ mean, spend time with the marvelous and awful people in your lives and tell me about them so İ can start collecting data for next year!

And remember, if this year's celebrations were subpar or unsatisfactory in any way, there are still a couple occasions on their way before normalcy comes back to settle in your routines. So do not worry and rely freely on me to add some charm to your holidays and destroy what would interfere 👁

[ask-santatar]

Dear Santatar,

My boss is an asshole. I got injured on the job, back in the summer, and he refuses to take ANY responsibility. I am fuming and at my wit's end, but at the same time I can't even quit, because I need the money. Could you set a pair of hell hounds on my employer? It would really brighten up the holiday season. Thank you in advance.

My dear nameless friend,

What a terrible thing indeed! What kind of boss doesn't strive to keep their underlings in perfect performance condition? Such a shame, for our evil line of work...

It would be my pleasure to fulfill your request and send some to deal with them! İ may even instruct them to leave a few intact bones behind to deck the halls with 👁

Keep an eye out, for your present shall soon be delivered!

P.S.: Would you by any chance be interested in a new job? There's plenty of opportunities in Mordor, and really, how worse can it be?

[most-likely-shadowhisker]

Nine rings were made for men. Seven for the dwarves, three for the elves, and one for the big guy himself. One, three, seven, nine. There is but a set of five missing to complete the sequence of odd numbers. I propose that this missing set of rings of power was gifted to a mysterious someone by their true love, along with a partridge in a pear tree (among other things). In this essay I will-

[ask-santatar]

That is a most interesting theory 👁 Maybe one day we'll have a chance to discuss it?

[ask-santatar]

It's that time of the year again...

My Master's planet has completed another revolution around that pesky Maia's fiery manifestation and its peoples face another period of festivities designed to keep the dark and cold at bay. That means sparkles, fireplaces and above all the neverending talks of presents: precisely my time to shine!

İ, the Great, Generous ✨ Lord of Gifts ✨, am finally back in business, ready to hear any desire you might have out, and maybe fulfilling it too! For no price at all of course 👁

My service will be fairly unchanged from the previous years: İ'll be waiting for all those letters you'd dare not to send my esteemed colleagues who'd only consider who is on their Nice list, and İ'll make sure personally that each and every one of you is satisfied.

İ'll be waiting 👁

[ask-santatar]

Welcome To The Lord Of Gifts Annatar’s Naughty List

Have you ever wanted an extra occasion to get spoiled? A social obligation to hang out with your relatives so you can brag about stuff a stranger gave you out of reads scribbled writing on his hand the kindness of his heart? Do you envy those celebrations like that “Christmas” they seem to have in lands so alien and far from your Shire or Dale or Citadel? Well, then you might want to consider welcoming your new dark overlord- ahem İ mean, Lord of Gifts Annatar*!

A carefully penned list of who among you is undeserving of presents from any respectable winter solstice festivity-related figure out there (and thus more than deserving of my attention) is already underway, so don’t hesitate sending your precious little letters over! Just be careful what you wish for though 👁

* Ignore the various instances of Santatar on the contact info, the Yule Orcs are now working on fixing their mispellings.

[ask-santatar]

PSA: We're officially opening the inbox for this year's letters!

The official message from our most generous Lord Annatar will be up soon, so stay tuned!

[ask-santatar]

My dearest Santatar, Oh, goodness, do I love the name!

Thank you for the present, my Splendid One! It was most unexpected and brings me such great comfort in these bleak days of winter, when I find I truly ask for nothing better to do than to stroke its fur and listen to it purr in my lap. It is a wonderous beast, as you described it in the note: proud in its strut, endearing in its mischievousness, and most intelligent, for it has already learnt exactly which visitors are welcome and which require to be dealt with at the gate, in proportion to their peculiar degree of insolence. We wouldn’t want to be too harsh, now, would we?

I know you have been terribly busy, what with this festive new endeavour of yours, but could you not find the time to bless me with your company? I have a present for you, too. It’s made of lace and gemstones, and it would be so unbearably sweet to see it on you… And then off you, of course.

Won’t you be a darling, this year, and let me whisper to you about all the ways in which my heart has missed you?

All the best from your ever… fateful Míriel. P.S.: It’s always gone without saying, but I know it’s been on your mind, so let me reassure you: I forgive you.

My Queen,

İ am infinitely glad you appreciated my humble gift. Giving gifts might be my speciality, but knowing İ’ve managed to please you just has a distinct brand of satisfaction to it.

To be fair, İ had already considered you as a victor on the eve of the last big event. The only thought that stopped me and made me leave just a note instead of staying to present my gift in person was the one that went to all the deliveries that would have cut my stay shorter than İ would have liked (or than you deserve, really).

My original plan therefore was to make the last delivery of the last day a second gift to you, so that there could be nothing rushing us, and to hell with the appointed winner… and then you single-handedly defeated any potential candidate, thus claiming the final first spot without any need for cheating! As expected from the Jewel Queen 👁 İ genuinely can’t wait to see that present you spoke of with my own Eye, too…

Tonight, the last deliveries of the season will be mostly done by the wraiths. And by mostly İ mean, all but one. Wait for me, my Queen. If you’ll still have me, it will be this humble Dark lord’s honour to be your gift tonight.

Yours

Tar-Mairon

P.S.: …alas, İ am well aware. Kindness isn’t for everyone; however, it has always suited you best.

P.P.S: İ miss you too, precious one.

[ask-santatar]

Some proposals for a new kind of decoration.

İ derived the plant from Eregion Holly 👁 it’s called mistletoe, it’s a parasitic plant and, coincidentally, looks like it’s boosting my charm quite a lot!

Did İ mention it’s highly toxic, too?

[ask-santatar]

A rare case of a snowy scenery in Mordor

Isn’t snow the greatest charm of winter? Ah, nothing more romantic than shards of ice falling from the dark skies... İ would almost say it’s melancholic... It has been a while since İ had the bittersweet pleasure to be surrounded by a frozen land, snow falling quietly and making the screams from the dungeons seem so distant... İ have never been one for cold weather myself, but İ can appreciate the spike of nostalgia once in a while.

Anyway, this is no frequent view, so İ suggest you enjoy it while it lasts, without paying too much thought to how the snowflakes look a lot more like frozen rocks, or to how blood hasn’t properly washed off some of them. İ had promised you a grand festivity after all, and by the Mighty Arising İ am going to give you one; the wise don’t ask more questions.

[ask-santatar]

LAST MINUTE UPDATE

Hello, Lieutenant Gothmog here.

The scribe is still recovering from the close encounter with Unknown Forces and the questioning that followed, so I’m in charge once again of the update service. Our Lord wants you to know that most requests for the big night have been processed, and soon the Top Tier list will be disclosed to the public.

Note that every seasonal occasion still has its own top tier list; this one’s just tied to the main event, and thus has a special spotlight on it. His majesty Lord Santatar is now poring over the candidates, so if you still want to try your luck for a personal delivery, now’s your last chance!

This has been an update from the Lugbúrz headquarters; stay tuned next for authorized tunes, decoration reports from the Sammath Naur team and possibly, letter extracts deemed noteworthy or hilarious.

[nazgulinthedogpark]

Christmas in Mordor:

- Annatar, the Lord of Gifts, giving presents to some orclings

- Azog and Bolg putting up the Christmas tree

- Nazgûl and mistletoe

[ask-santatar]

Now, this is what İ call accurate representation!

(Especially the confused Nazgul. And the perplexed but enthusiastic Yule Orcs. And me, doing most of the job. Alas, the woes of nobility and incommensurable generosity...)

[ask-santatar]

A SUDDEN DISAPPEARANCE?

Dear requesters, naughty children and jewellery lovers, you may have noticed a conspicuous lack of updates over the past few days. İ offer my most sincere apologies. In fact, we just went through a terribly busy period with two heavy delivery shifts that left me and my team of deliverywraiths utterly exhausted, our wings as sore as they hadn’t been in months.*

(Also, the goblin scribe that usually uploads this service’s messages wandered off about a week ago and was back in a dazed state with no explanation other than that “real life caught up with her”, whatever that means.)

İ am currently investigating what dared undermine my system’s productivity, so rest assured that similar disservices won’t become a regular occurrence. 👁

* I would not advise you follow Lord Khamul’s example and suggest the celebration with the krampus-balrogs might have something to do with it. I really would not. Trust me. (Scribe’s Note)