Ask Nicol Bolas

I am an Elder Dragon as well as a Planeswalker. Some people consider me Dominaria's most ancient evil. Soon, they will consider me master.

[markrosewater]

Birthday trivia on the cuddly Dragon that is Nicol Bolas please.

Nicol Bolas was dead for a while. He got better.

Happy Birthday!

[askbolas]

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[askbolas]

Need anyone killed? A troublesome mind mage perhaps? I'd do that one for free.

I have no need for vigilantes.

[askbolas]

You don't have any plans for Kamigawa, do you?

Why would I?

The only thing worth taking from that Plane is no longer in a usable form.  Besides, I am already beyond divinity.

[askbolas]

Bolas if you keep killing dragons soon there won't be any dragons around for you to bang. Do you really want to live for an eternity without sex?

You mammals are oddly preoccupied with my sex life.

[askbolas]

//-quietly freaking out that you're sorta back-

For a fleeting moment, Rogue.

I have many things to attend to.

[askbolas]

OI, BOLAS! *flips the bird and skateboards away*

In many cultures, you just propositioned to marry me with that hand signal.

I decline.  You disgust me.

[askbolas]

I am answering questions tonight.

[askbolas]

So which plane had the most attractive dragons? Any specific ones you like? ;)

Numot the Devestator is one of the few people I would consider a viable partner.

[askbolas]

Are you evil

Might makes right.

I am so very right.

[askbolas]

How do can we, your humble minion serve you sexually?

My kink is being left alone.

[askbolas]

Have you heard by now that you actually didn't kill Ugin?

It does not matter if Ugin lives or not.

[askbolas]

May we, your humble followers, know small details of this plan that has begun?

In a backwater Plane you will likely never hear of, there lived a filthy, little porcine monarch.  His house artificiers were on the verge of a breakthrough in weapon's development but were unfortunately stymied due to political and ethical reasons.

A whisper was all it took.  I inspired his little porcine wife to end his little porcine life and the tinkerers continued to work.

Now we have a Plane populated entirely by pigs.  No more humans, dragons, angels, merfolk, goblins...  Anything without a snout.

And I have a new toy.

[askbolas]

Why today, of all days, to answer questions?

A minor scheme has come to fruition.

I am in a good mood.

[askbolas]

I am open to your questions today.

[askbolas]

Nicol Bolas, my fellow Planeswalker, who is stronger between you and Ugin? Clearly you beat him before, but looking at what Ugin can do and what you can do, I'm not quite sure who is actually stronger. Not to mention it's more complicated to bring you out than it is to bring out Ugin. Not to fret, however, someday, I, Charlie Spurr, Planeswalker, shall surpass you, steal your power, and become the most powerful being in the multiverse.

I killed Ugin.  I am more powerful.  I can do it again just like I can kill you.

You are of no consequence to me.  Do you know how many aspiring schemers boast this?  Do you know just how many I have annihilated before they become anything of consequence?

I don't either.  It's not a number worth keeping track of.

[askbolas]

Nicol Bolas, Planeswalker. I too am a Planeswalker. I aspire to surpass you, to supplant you, and to steal your power for my own and become the most powerful being in the multiverse!

You're going to die unceremoniously.

[zeico]

Ship- Bolas x Lili

Who cooks? the minions

Who’s the messiest? The cleanest? can be equally messy or cleam

Who fixes the vehicle after a breakdown? the minions

Living space has a leak! Who fixes it? the minions

Who buys the groceries? liliana’s zambies

Going out to eat: Who pays? Who orders the most food? And who has dessert? no one pays bolas orders more And liliana gets an extra dessert

Would they go to the beach? yes

Who knows how to swim? Who doesn’t? can both swim

Is someone multilingual? Do they try to teach another language to the other? How does it go? Bolas knows all languages

Any pets? Or plants? Bolas has pets named tezzeret and Sarkhan vol

Baths or showers? Together or separate? Any bubbles or bubble fights? liliana takes the longest baths EVER bolas has planned at least 30 schemes by the times shes done

Can they stand silence? Who talks the most? Who talks the least? liliana talks the most 

Who stays up late? Who sleeps the most? Does the other have to force them to sleep/wake up? bolas doesnt sleep 

Who is the highest maintenance? Does the other mind? liliana is a high maintainence queen and everyone knows it

Vacation ideas: who decides them? Where would they go, if anywhere? they take turns but bolas decides more and whatever plane they can terrorize and conquer

[askbolas]

Disgusting.  Vess is so tiny and has no scales.

All I want from her is the Chain Veil.