Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
if i look back, i am lost
art blog(derogatory)
Misplaced Lens Cap
Origami Around
JBB: An Artblog!
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Xuebing Du
Sade Olutola
Peter Solarz
tannertan36
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TVSTRANGERTHINGS
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YOU ARE THE REASON
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Love Begins
Andulka
seen from Germany
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seen from United States
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@askdjacobs
Hello! I am really quite unsure of what I'm doing.
Ask me questions, I suppose. I'll try my best to answer them.
...right. Here's some information about me.
I'm seventeen.
I've got a younger brother named Les and a twin sister named Sarah. Unfortunately, I am the younger one.
My family and I are Jewish. We immigrated to the States from Poland when Sarah and I were around five.
You can call me Davey; a lot of folks do. Or Dave. David. Something.
Ask away?
OOC
My favorite food is pickles because if you separate the words it’d be PICK LES
Hi! I’m Les and I’m running for president of the United States of the south and north of America!
My good traits are that I’m kinder than most boys my age! And I am um *looks at hand* energetic, whatever that means!
I am endlessly curious and like to make things explode! I hate school! But I like trying new foods like watermelon and lysol!
My not good things are that Jack says that I can be really damn annoying and my big brother doesn’t like molasses! And also I’m not aloud to say bad words in Polish:(
PICK LES for president!
@ask-jackk @askdjacobs 
I admire your ambition, but-
...
Well, on second though, why not? Go on, everyone - support my brother.
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
I know a fact!
Jack the ripper killed five women in the so called ‘Autumn of Terror’ in 1888!
( @askdjacobs )
...Lesham. Why?
We will be moving on from that. Jack, do you have any facts?
(@ask-jackk)
yeah, pulitzer’s an idiot!
I'm surprised you didn't mention anything to do with the west or cowboys but, I do agree.
(@ask-jackk)
‘course ya do, davey!
Jack laughs.
Would you like to share a cowboy fact? I know you hold many and I’m certain Les would be interested.
(@ask-jackk)
sure.
well, loada cowboys are mexican! like me! ain’t that neat, les?
(@totallynotles)
Wow really??
yeah!
What makes a person a cowboy?
well, ya gotta be real fly. like me! then, ya gotta get yaself a horse to ride. then ya ride ‘round santa fe!
You can fly?
I haven’t seen you fly before!
means ya real swell.
*les looks at Jack’s feet*
You’re feet aren’t swelling so how are you swell?
Jack runs a hand through his hair.
means ‘m, i dunno, neat.
Oh okay
*les stares at him*
What else is swell?
uh, the strike
Ohhh! anything else?
davey too!
SWELLLLLL!
shi-shush up, ya want ima to come ova?
Don’t worry! She sleeps like you when you fell asleep on our floor!
aight, that happened THREE TIMES
Fool you once blame on me, fool twice you blame on you, fool you three times—
fool ya three times ya go inside!
@askdjacobs
Well, you've heard Jack. To bed, Leshem.
*Davey pushes Les back through the window, tossing the blanket over him.*
(@totallynotles)
Fine…
*les sighs but then smirks*
Les?
(@totallynotles)
Yes, bubba?
Do not make that face.
And - why are you calling me bubba?
Bubba
*Les’s smirk gets bigger*
Jack calls you that whenever we talk about you!
I beg your pardon? I'm sure he does not.
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
I know a fact!
Jack the ripper killed five women in the so called ‘Autumn of Terror’ in 1888!
( @askdjacobs )
...Lesham. Why?
We will be moving on from that. Jack, do you have any facts?
(@ask-jackk)
yeah, pulitzer’s an idiot!
I'm surprised you didn't mention anything to do with the west or cowboys but, I do agree.
(@ask-jackk)
‘course ya do, davey!
Jack laughs.
Would you like to share a cowboy fact? I know you hold many and I’m certain Les would be interested.
(@ask-jackk)
sure.
well, loada cowboys are mexican! like me! ain’t that neat, les?
(@totallynotles)
Wow really??
yeah!
What makes a person a cowboy?
well, ya gotta be real fly. like me! then, ya gotta get yaself a horse to ride. then ya ride ‘round santa fe!
You can fly?
I haven’t seen you fly before!
means ya real swell.
*les looks at Jack’s feet*
You’re feet aren’t swelling so how are you swell?
Jack runs a hand through his hair.
means ‘m, i dunno, neat.
Oh okay
*les stares at him*
What else is swell?
uh, the strike
Ohhh! anything else?
davey too!
SWELLLLLL!
shi-shush up, ya want ima to come ova?
Don’t worry! She sleeps like you when you fell asleep on our floor!
aight, that happened THREE TIMES
Fool you once blame on me, fool twice you blame on you, fool you three times—
fool ya three times ya go inside!
@askdjacobs
Well, you've heard Jack. To bed, Leshem.
*Davey pushes Les back through the window, tossing the blanket over him.*
(@totallynotles)
Fine…
*les sighs but then smirks*
Les?
(@totallynotles)
Yes, bubba?
Do not make that face.
And - why are you calling me bubba?
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
I know a fact!
Jack the ripper killed five women in the so called ‘Autumn of Terror’ in 1888!
( @askdjacobs )
...Lesham. Why?
We will be moving on from that. Jack, do you have any facts?
(@ask-jackk)
yeah, pulitzer’s an idiot!
I'm surprised you didn't mention anything to do with the west or cowboys but, I do agree.
(@ask-jackk)
‘course ya do, davey!
Jack laughs.
Would you like to share a cowboy fact? I know you hold many and I’m certain Les would be interested.
(@ask-jackk)
sure.
well, loada cowboys are mexican! like me! ain’t that neat, les?
(@totallynotles)
Wow really??
yeah!
What makes a person a cowboy?
well, ya gotta be real fly. like me! then, ya gotta get yaself a horse to ride. then ya ride ‘round santa fe!
You can fly?
I haven’t seen you fly before!
means ya real swell.
*les looks at Jack’s feet*
You’re feet aren’t swelling so how are you swell?
Jack runs a hand through his hair.
means ‘m, i dunno, neat.
Oh okay
*les stares at him*
What else is swell?
uh, the strike
Ohhh! anything else?
davey too!
SWELLLLLL!
shi-shush up, ya want ima to come ova?
Don’t worry! She sleeps like you when you fell asleep on our floor!
aight, that happened THREE TIMES
Fool you once blame on me, fool twice you blame on you, fool you three times—
fool ya three times ya go inside!
@askdjacobs
Well, you've heard Jack. To bed, Leshem.
*Davey pushes Les back through the window, tossing the blanket over him.*
(@totallynotles)
Fine…
*les sighs but then smirks*
Les?
(@totallynotles)
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
I know a fact!
Jack the ripper killed five women in the so called ‘Autumn of Terror’ in 1888!
( @askdjacobs )
...Lesham. Why?
We will be moving on from that. Jack, do you have any facts?
(@ask-jackk)
yeah, pulitzer’s an idiot!
I'm surprised you didn't mention anything to do with the west or cowboys but, I do agree.
(@ask-jackk)
‘course ya do, davey!
Jack laughs.
Would you like to share a cowboy fact? I know you hold many and I’m certain Les would be interested.
(@ask-jackk)
sure.
well, loada cowboys are mexican! like me! ain’t that neat, les?
(@totallynotles)
Wow really??
yeah!
What makes a person a cowboy?
well, ya gotta be real fly. like me! then, ya gotta get yaself a horse to ride. then ya ride ‘round santa fe!
You can fly?
I haven’t seen you fly before!
means ya real swell.
*les looks at Jack’s feet*
You’re feet aren’t swelling so how are you swell?
Jack runs a hand through his hair.
means ‘m, i dunno, neat.
Oh okay
*les stares at him*
What else is swell?
uh, the strike
Ohhh! anything else?
davey too!
SWELLLLLL!
shi-shush up, ya want ima to come ova?
Don’t worry! She sleeps like you when you fell asleep on our floor!
aight, that happened THREE TIMES
Fool you once blame on me, fool twice you blame on you, fool you three times—
fool ya three times ya go inside!
@askdjacobs
Well, you've heard Jack. To bed, Leshem.
*Davey pushes Les back through the window, tossing the blanket over him.*
(@totallynotles)
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
I know a fact!
Jack the ripper killed five women in the so called ‘Autumn of Terror’ in 1888!
( @askdjacobs )
...Lesham. Why?
We will be moving on from that. Jack, do you have any facts?
(@ask-jackk)
yeah, pulitzer’s an idiot!
I'm surprised you didn't mention anything to do with the west or cowboys but, I do agree.
(@ask-jackk)
‘course ya do, davey!
Jack laughs.
Would you like to share a cowboy fact? I know you hold many and I’m certain Les would be interested.
(@ask-jackk)
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
I know a fact!
Jack the ripper killed five women in the so called ‘Autumn of Terror’ in 1888!
( @askdjacobs )
...Lesham. Why?
We will be moving on from that. Jack, do you have any facts?
(@ask-jackk)
yeah, pulitzer’s an idiot!
I'm surprised you didn't mention anything to do with the west or cowboys but, I do agree.
(@ask-jackk)
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
I know a fact!
Jack the ripper killed five women in the so called ‘Autumn of Terror’ in 1888!
( @askdjacobs )
...Lesham. Why?
We will be moving on from that. Jack, do you have any facts?
(@ask-jackk)
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
Huh? That’s a odd… I thought you knew everything!
*Les put his hand on his chin*
What’s a weird factile do you know?
( @askdjacobs )
No man can know everything, Lesham. As for a strange truth... perhaps the discovery of nuclein? I'm sure I could think of a better one, though, if I thought a bit more.
(@totallynotles)
*david and Jack were on the fire escape doing whatever they do on the fire escape you decide, when suddenly there was a loud scream.*
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I AM RIGHT HERE MAKING YOU SUPER AWARE OF MY ‘PERIOR ESENTS!!
— @totallynotles
SHUDDUP
ARE YOU AWARE??!
YEAH I’S AWARE CONSIDERIN’ YA IS SCREAMIN’ AT US!!! jesus christ…
GOOD! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU I KNOW THAT I’M AWAKE AND WATCHING YOU TWO BUMP SHOULDERS!
WHO’S GESUS??
OKAY???
uh, catholic thing. real ‘portant fella for us, but ain’t ‘portant for y’all.
OKAY! WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE? YOU CAN COME INSIDE!! ME AND DAVID’S BED IS REALLY COZY!
quit yellin’!
me n davey ‘ere are just talkin’. right, david?
(@askdjacobs)
Yes, we were simply conversing.
We are not coming inside because a certain child is supposed to be asleep, Lesham. And, please, do stop yelling. You'll wake up half the block at this rate.
(@totallynotles)
*les rolls his eyes*
Sorry big brother David.
*Les mutters something under his breath*
What was that?
(@totallynotles)
Nothing! Nothing!
*les climbs out onto the fire escape*
Just had something in my throat *cough cough*
lesssss
What?
tell your brudda the truth.
Maybe I will, but first you tell me why you’re out here!
( @ask-jackk )
we was talkin’!
About what?
uh, papes.
Oh okay!
*Les sits down*
Soooo what now?
talk.
Talk talk talk…
Did you see the Uglancey’s today?
I kicked one of them for pushing me off statue I was climbing! 
les, don’t climb statues.
I wasn’t it!
sure, buddy.
Thanks buddy!
i-
ah, whateva.
…Jackie you paint, right?
yeah! :D
Gasp!
You should write a comic!
naw, wouldn’t be successful.
My brother could write the story!
huh. maybe.
You should!
yeah, but what pape would run it?
The ummm sun? Moon? New York Times?
they ain’t gonna publish me, les.
You could sell them yourself
les, i ain’t white.
Huh? White? Like paper?
*Les grabs a piece of paper and puts it against his own skin*
Shitty-poopy-butt I’m not white either! IM DARK WHITE AHHHHHHH
naw, not like that, les.
y’know how i’s mexican n irish? ‘cause o’ that people don’t like me much. like, ya seen boots can’t sell in some places n the like.
*les puts the piece of paper next jack’s arm*
WE’RE BOTH NOT PAPER WHITE, AHHHH!
yeah, but youse whiter than me. see?
Does that mean all my cooking tease bland?? NOOOOO—
uh, i mean, youse 9, so ain’t expectin’ good cookin’ anyways!
Almost ten, actually!
which is nine.
So nine in a quarters! 
same thing.
Is not oldie!
youse like four feet tall don’t call me old!
Am not! I’m 6 foot 9!
naw ya ain’t!
You’re just jealous because you’re short!
what?
U-uhh nothing!
i ain’t short!
I didn’t say you were…um
kid
Yes?
i ain’t short.
What’s the normal height for a man?
why do ya think i’d know that?
Good question!
David!
( @askdjacobs )
You both do realize I do not know every factoid, right?
(@totallynotles)
davey, darlin’, do not eat the damn pie.
(@ask-jackk)
I had established that, but thank you for the endorsement.
May I ask why the sudden definite recommendation though? Les had told me that you had baked it together and you seem to be a mostly competent chief in the majority of cases.
les insisted, n ya know how he gets! can’t say naw to ‘im! n if there’s one thing in the kitchen i can’t do, it’s bake.
*David laughs quietly at the admission.*
Where did you two even get the ingredients for that pie?
les had some dough. i told ‘im to get chocolates! swear!
Why did he have dough? Was the initial plan to make a chocolate pie?
sellin’ papes, he says. n naw-i tell ‘im, david likes chocolate! get chocolate! but NAWWW the kid got his heart set on molasses! if there was a flood of molasses he’d simply eat it all!
Oh - dough as in money, not the baking sort. Well, that does make a bit more sense, I suppose. I had quite the picture of him going about his shopping with a lump of unbaked dough in hand.
He has never shown any great interest in molasses before now… I wonder what put the notion into his head.
i dunno. kids, crazy lil’ ones!
I have half a mind to hand him off to you for a week or so! He would most certainly enjoy it.
don’t! ya ima would kill me.
I mean it in jest, of course, but it would be amusing.
And yes, Imma would most certainly... disapprove. She does like you, though, so I doubt death would be her first act. Perhaps just a stern talking to, though I bet I would be getting one first.
a stern talkin’ to is a sure pipeline to death!
Not likely in our household, but perhaps Imma will make an exception for us.
i’s too young to die :(
Yes- yes, you are. In fact, I think you should try immortality.
then ya better try it with me, love!
All our friends ought to at least attempt it.
indeed. n medda n kloppman!
And my parents.
n lil les.
Sarah and the cat who haunts the alley behind our home and greatly dislikes me.
kath n spot.
Are Katherine and Spot not included in the friends catagory?
kath, yeah. spot…iffy.
I don't believe you have ever mentioned why you and Spot are "iffy" - would you tell me?
we never really got ‘long. he…he said some shit ‘bout michael. after. ‘pologized, but still.
Oh...
Do you remember when Race moved to Brooklyn? Was that one of the reasons why you were so angry?
i guess.
Are you still angry at him- or, well, them?
…it’s faded.
not at race, anyways, but spot…
i don’t reckon i’ll eva really get ‘long with ‘im.
That's alright. I don't reckon everyone will ever be getting along with everybody anyhow.
yeah.
…ya used reckon!
Jack grins.
Did I really? I must be picking up some of the words you oft use.
aye! youse a true newsie now!
I'm not sure about that- not just yet. I don't sell half as much as the rest of you.
Anyhow, it seems rather unfair that I am the one picking up words from your vernacular. Shouldn't it go both ways?
‘cause ya dead set on honesty, sweetheart!
if i talk real fancypants like ya kloppman would reckon i’ve been possessed n i really hate bein’ exorcised.
I am not set on honesty; I simply prefer not to go about pretending I have the plague just to sell a pape. It always leaves me feeling a bit guilty-
I beg your pardon- you've been exorcised before?
Jack rubs his eyes.
yeah, n wouldn’t do it again.
Who tried to exorcised you?
who’d ya think?
*David sighs, pressing up against Jack.*
I had hoped...
Heavens, Jack. I'm sorry.
’s all over now, darlin’.
he’s far gone now.
He's still in New York City- still in Manhattan, Jack.
They ought to bring back exiles. Send Snyder off to some barren, soulless rock where he can never again do harm to another soul.
yeah.
*Davey pulls Jack into a hug, sighing.*
I really must stop driving conversations into such a direction.
’s fine, love.
He presses a kiss to David’s forehead.
Why don't you ask me a question this time? You ought to be better at leading this conversation to lighter topics.
hmmmm.
how does it feel to have the best beau in the woild?
*David laughs - a genuine sound that catches even him off guard.*
It is very nice. He is the kindest, bravest boy I know. I am sure he know this, but I am rather fond of his face - his smile, especially - and his voice. I daresay my family may like him better than they do me.
aw, don’t lie!
I'm not!
If I cannot bring myself to lie about the headlines, what makes you think I would be able to lie about this?
He laughs.
makin’ my head big with all o’ the compliments!
*Davey lightly shoves Jack with his shoulder.*
I had nothing to do with you gaining a big head - you already had one!
did not!
Jack laughs.
Did too!
stop it, ya’ll make me blush!
Perhaps that was my intention.
Jack laughs.
aw, shuddup.
Are you really asking the Walking Mouth to be quiet?
Jack blushes a little.
well-
Well what?
*Davey pokes Jack playfully.*
…i give uppp…
Why, you haven't even tried!
Surely the leader of Manhattan, the comrade of Governor Roosevelt, the striker who brought Pulitzer to his knees can do better than this?
i can’t fight with ya! drives me mad!
Oh, alright then.
Ask me another question?
has esther taught ya to cook or do ya expect me to do all the cookin’?
*Davey scoffs, lightly shoving Jack yet again.*
I... can cook - enough to not starve at the very least. It's mostly science, math, and memorization, isn't it?
since when was math n science in cookin’?
Was... it not?
uhhh. i don’t use any o’ that…
i measure with me soul!
But... how? I mean, Imma does the same - I suppose all mothers do - but I've never been great with vagueness.
when ya makin’ eggs n ya wanna season ‘em, ya grab whateva ya reckon would make it taste good n ya sprinkle it on.
Very... specific.
How often do you cook?
‘s called n example, sweetheart.
wheneva kloppman lets me into the kitchen-so ‘round twice a month.
Right- right, yes. Of course. An example.
I was trying for... sarcasm? I reckon it didn't come out right.
Um, anyhow, do you cook for everyone or just yourself?
as many as we got ingredients for-i try to get to the littleuns at least, for sure.
That is very kind of you. What do you make? Not just eggs, I hope.
usually i make whateva we got-but usually, that be potatoes, maybeee meat. sometimes i make empanadas.
What are empanadas?
darlin’, ya gotta try ‘em! i oughta bring some ova one o’ these days.
Oh, please do not feel obligated to - they do sound delicious, though.
i will. the outside is a lil’ kinda like pastry but it ain’t sweet. ‘s all flavorful.
Well, only if you allow me to treat you to pączki afterwards.
wha’s that?
It is a sweet fried pastry with filling. Though I am not generally much taken with sweets, this is one thing that has always brought me a good deal of joy.
Les and I used to buy one to share after school, whenever we had the money for it. We typically saved a third for Sarah, but they are intoxicatingly good and it was hard not to eat your share and more.
davey, darlin’, do not eat the damn pie.
(@ask-jackk)
I had established that, but thank you for the endorsement.
May I ask why the sudden definite recommendation though? Les had told me that you had baked it together and you seem to be a mostly competent chief in the majority of cases.
les insisted, n ya know how he gets! can’t say naw to ‘im! n if there’s one thing in the kitchen i can’t do, it’s bake.
*David laughs quietly at the admission.*
Where did you two even get the ingredients for that pie?
les had some dough. i told ‘im to get chocolates! swear!
Why did he have dough? Was the initial plan to make a chocolate pie?
sellin’ papes, he says. n naw-i tell ‘im, david likes chocolate! get chocolate! but NAWWW the kid got his heart set on molasses! if there was a flood of molasses he’d simply eat it all!
Oh - dough as in money, not the baking sort. Well, that does make a bit more sense, I suppose. I had quite the picture of him going about his shopping with a lump of unbaked dough in hand.
He has never shown any great interest in molasses before now… I wonder what put the notion into his head.
i dunno. kids, crazy lil’ ones!
I have half a mind to hand him off to you for a week or so! He would most certainly enjoy it.
don’t! ya ima would kill me.
I mean it in jest, of course, but it would be amusing.
And yes, Imma would most certainly... disapprove. She does like you, though, so I doubt death would be her first act. Perhaps just a stern talking to, though I bet I would be getting one first.
a stern talkin’ to is a sure pipeline to death!
Not likely in our household, but perhaps Imma will make an exception for us.
i’s too young to die :(
Yes- yes, you are. In fact, I think you should try immortality.
then ya better try it with me, love!
All our friends ought to at least attempt it.
indeed. n medda n kloppman!
And my parents.
n lil les.
Sarah and the cat who haunts the alley behind our home and greatly dislikes me.
kath n spot.
Are Katherine and Spot not included in the friends catagory?
kath, yeah. spot…iffy.
I don't believe you have ever mentioned why you and Spot are "iffy" - would you tell me?
we never really got ‘long. he…he said some shit ‘bout michael. after. ‘pologized, but still.
Oh...
Do you remember when Race moved to Brooklyn? Was that one of the reasons why you were so angry?
i guess.
Are you still angry at him- or, well, them?
…it’s faded.
not at race, anyways, but spot…
i don’t reckon i’ll eva really get ‘long with ‘im.
That's alright. I don't reckon everyone will ever be getting along with everybody anyhow.
yeah.
…ya used reckon!
Jack grins.
Did I really? I must be picking up some of the words you oft use.
aye! youse a true newsie now!
I'm not sure about that- not just yet. I don't sell half as much as the rest of you.
Anyhow, it seems rather unfair that I am the one picking up words from your vernacular. Shouldn't it go both ways?
‘cause ya dead set on honesty, sweetheart!
if i talk real fancypants like ya kloppman would reckon i’ve been possessed n i really hate bein’ exorcised.
I am not set on honesty; I simply prefer not to go about pretending I have the plague just to sell a pape. It always leaves me feeling a bit guilty-
I beg your pardon- you've been exorcised before?
Jack rubs his eyes.
yeah, n wouldn’t do it again.
Who tried to exorcised you?
who’d ya think?
*David sighs, pressing up against Jack.*
I had hoped...
Heavens, Jack. I'm sorry.
’s all over now, darlin’.
he’s far gone now.
He's still in New York City- still in Manhattan, Jack.
They ought to bring back exiles. Send Snyder off to some barren, soulless rock where he can never again do harm to another soul.
yeah.
*Davey pulls Jack into a hug, sighing.*
I really must stop driving conversations into such a direction.
’s fine, love.
He presses a kiss to David’s forehead.
Why don't you ask me a question this time? You ought to be better at leading this conversation to lighter topics.
hmmmm.
how does it feel to have the best beau in the woild?
*David laughs - a genuine sound that catches even him off guard.*
It is very nice. He is the kindest, bravest boy I know. I am sure he know this, but I am rather fond of his face - his smile, especially - and his voice. I daresay my family may like him better than they do me.
aw, don’t lie!
I'm not!
If I cannot bring myself to lie about the headlines, what makes you think I would be able to lie about this?
He laughs.
makin’ my head big with all o’ the compliments!
*Davey lightly shoves Jack with his shoulder.*
I had nothing to do with you gaining a big head - you already had one!
did not!
Jack laughs.
Did too!
stop it, ya’ll make me blush!
Perhaps that was my intention.
Jack laughs.
aw, shuddup.
Are you really asking the Walking Mouth to be quiet?
Jack blushes a little.
well-
Well what?
*Davey pokes Jack playfully.*
…i give uppp…
Why, you haven't even tried!
Surely the leader of Manhattan, the comrade of Governor Roosevelt, the striker who brought Pulitzer to his knees can do better than this?
i can’t fight with ya! drives me mad!
Oh, alright then.
Ask me another question?
has esther taught ya to cook or do ya expect me to do all the cookin’?
*Davey scoffs, lightly shoving Jack yet again.*
I... can cook - enough to not starve at the very least. It's mostly science, math, and memorization, isn't it?
since when was math n science in cookin’?
Was... it not?
uhhh. i don’t use any o’ that…
i measure with me soul!
But... how? I mean, Imma does the same - I suppose all mothers do - but I've never been great with vagueness.
when ya makin’ eggs n ya wanna season ‘em, ya grab whateva ya reckon would make it taste good n ya sprinkle it on.
Very... specific.
How often do you cook?
‘s called n example, sweetheart.
wheneva kloppman lets me into the kitchen-so ‘round twice a month.
Right- right, yes. Of course. An example.
I was trying for... sarcasm? I reckon it didn't come out right.
Um, anyhow, do you cook for everyone or just yourself?
as many as we got ingredients for-i try to get to the littleuns at least, for sure.
That is very kind of you. What do you make? Not just eggs, I hope.
usually i make whateva we got-but usually, that be potatoes, maybeee meat. sometimes i make empanadas.
What are empanadas?
darlin’, ya gotta try ‘em! i oughta bring some ova one o’ these days.
Oh, please do not feel obligated to - they do sound delicious, though.
i will. the outside is a lil’ kinda like pastry but it ain’t sweet. ‘s all flavorful.
Well, only if you allow me to treat you to pączki afterwards.
*Les hugs David’s legs, crying*
D-David! one of the uglancy brothers pushed me off a statue I-I was climbing and I can’t find touchy J-Jacky anywhere! Wahhhh
( @totallynotles )
*David crouches down, pulling Les into a hug.*
Shhh- shhh, you're alright. Does anything hurt?
M-my E-Ed!
Oh, Lesham... let me take a look.
*Davey pulls back, gently running his hands over Les's skull, trying to feel for any bumps.*
Tell me if I touch anywhere that hurts particularly so. Did you hit your head as you fell?
I hit my ‘ed on the hand of the statue I was climbing and the hand broke!
BAHH!
Well, destruction of public property is a problem we will ignore for now.
I don't feel anything wrong with your head in particular, but I know bumps to it are quite dangerous. Do you think you hurt enough to warrant a trip back home to Imma?
No I don’t want imma to be mad! again…
Touchy Jackie said I have a big solf head so my head probably just went BONG!!
Firstly, I am sure Imma would not be irked. I do hope you are aware that she cares for you - in fact, I'm quite sure you are the favorite of the three of us.
Secondly, please do not refer to Jack as that. That is an awful nickname, even by my standards.
Thirdly, Jack said what about your head? Heavens, you really aren't making much sense. Does your head seem to hurt on the outside or the inside, Les? More like a scrape or a headache?
He said my ‘Ed was big and round and solf and rock hard at the same time!
When it hit the ground it went BONG!!!
...Lesham, please, speak plainly.
At this moment, I do not care what Jack said concerning the firmness your head. I simply want to know in what manner it hurts.
This part! And this part, and this part!
*les points to random parts of his head*
Can heads really go BONG?
*Davey lets out a slightly exasperated sigh, grabbing Les's hands and holding them still.*
Truthfully? I have no notion whether a head is capable of making such a sound. From what I recall of that theater rally the Bulls broke up, the sound of a head being struck was more of a crack.
It didn’t crack! The ugly’s laughter was too loud so I couldn’t hear anything!
Ah...
How badly do you hurt, Les? And please, speak in simple terms. Personally, I really would like to have someone else look at it- Imma, or if that option seems terribly unpleasant, perhaps Mr. Kloppman? Even Jack or Racetrack, if you should choose.
*Davey smiles reassuringly, carefully and very lightly tapping Les's forehead with his knuckles.*
I would hate for that smart noggin to be damaged.
Not too bad… Ohhh! I wanna see Jackie! I haven’t seen him since he came up on our fire escape last night!
I’m still very smart actually! Ask me a smart question and I’ll answer it!

...alright.
If I were to multiply twelve by eleven, what would I get?
You have learned multiplication, right? To be frank, I have forgotten what they teach you at this age...
132! I did that in my mind! It’s called… math mind!
I came up with it last night when you and Jackie were bumping shoulders!
*David smiles, brushing a strand of Les's hair out of his face.*
Yes, one-hundred thirty-two is correct. That was very clever of you. However, please stop watching Jack and I.
Or, at least, make us aware of your presence.
Yay! I’m so very telligent!
Okay I will…😈
...I dislike that expression you are making. I know it means mischief.
Really, are we so loud that you cannot ignore us and go back to sleep?
Me? Mischief? Never!
Yes! You’re very loud and I like eavesdropping so I can’t go back to sleep! 
You subsist off mischief. I believe it is a large part of your diet.
I apologize for being too loud - however, I would prefer you interrupt us than eavesdrop.
How can I eat mischief?
It’s not an edible item!
It was a- nevermind.
I apologize. Yes, you are right - you cannot eat mischief. You do, nonetheless, commit quite the amount.
No, I don’t…
Name one ischief thing I’ve done!
You drew a comic about your pies, Jack, and I.
Umm that’s just me being reative! Like Sarah said!
The whole pie businesses was one of general mischief.
davey, darlin’, do not eat the damn pie.
(@ask-jackk)
I had established that, but thank you for the endorsement.
May I ask why the sudden definite recommendation though? Les had told me that you had baked it together and you seem to be a mostly competent chief in the majority of cases.
les insisted, n ya know how he gets! can’t say naw to ‘im! n if there’s one thing in the kitchen i can’t do, it’s bake.
*David laughs quietly at the admission.*
Where did you two even get the ingredients for that pie?
les had some dough. i told ‘im to get chocolates! swear!
Why did he have dough? Was the initial plan to make a chocolate pie?
sellin’ papes, he says. n naw-i tell ‘im, david likes chocolate! get chocolate! but NAWWW the kid got his heart set on molasses! if there was a flood of molasses he’d simply eat it all!
Oh - dough as in money, not the baking sort. Well, that does make a bit more sense, I suppose. I had quite the picture of him going about his shopping with a lump of unbaked dough in hand.
He has never shown any great interest in molasses before now… I wonder what put the notion into his head.
i dunno. kids, crazy lil’ ones!
I have half a mind to hand him off to you for a week or so! He would most certainly enjoy it.
don’t! ya ima would kill me.
I mean it in jest, of course, but it would be amusing.
And yes, Imma would most certainly... disapprove. She does like you, though, so I doubt death would be her first act. Perhaps just a stern talking to, though I bet I would be getting one first.
a stern talkin’ to is a sure pipeline to death!
Not likely in our household, but perhaps Imma will make an exception for us.
i’s too young to die :(
Yes- yes, you are. In fact, I think you should try immortality.
then ya better try it with me, love!
All our friends ought to at least attempt it.
indeed. n medda n kloppman!
And my parents.
n lil les.
Sarah and the cat who haunts the alley behind our home and greatly dislikes me.
kath n spot.
Are Katherine and Spot not included in the friends catagory?
kath, yeah. spot…iffy.
I don't believe you have ever mentioned why you and Spot are "iffy" - would you tell me?
we never really got ‘long. he…he said some shit ‘bout michael. after. ‘pologized, but still.
Oh...
Do you remember when Race moved to Brooklyn? Was that one of the reasons why you were so angry?
i guess.
Are you still angry at him- or, well, them?
…it’s faded.
not at race, anyways, but spot…
i don’t reckon i’ll eva really get ‘long with ‘im.
That's alright. I don't reckon everyone will ever be getting along with everybody anyhow.
yeah.
…ya used reckon!
Jack grins.
Did I really? I must be picking up some of the words you oft use.
aye! youse a true newsie now!
I'm not sure about that- not just yet. I don't sell half as much as the rest of you.
Anyhow, it seems rather unfair that I am the one picking up words from your vernacular. Shouldn't it go both ways?
‘cause ya dead set on honesty, sweetheart!
if i talk real fancypants like ya kloppman would reckon i’ve been possessed n i really hate bein’ exorcised.
I am not set on honesty; I simply prefer not to go about pretending I have the plague just to sell a pape. It always leaves me feeling a bit guilty-
I beg your pardon- you've been exorcised before?
Jack rubs his eyes.
yeah, n wouldn’t do it again.
Who tried to exorcised you?
who’d ya think?
*David sighs, pressing up against Jack.*
I had hoped...
Heavens, Jack. I'm sorry.
’s all over now, darlin’.
he’s far gone now.
He's still in New York City- still in Manhattan, Jack.
They ought to bring back exiles. Send Snyder off to some barren, soulless rock where he can never again do harm to another soul.
yeah.
*Davey pulls Jack into a hug, sighing.*
I really must stop driving conversations into such a direction.
’s fine, love.
He presses a kiss to David’s forehead.
Why don't you ask me a question this time? You ought to be better at leading this conversation to lighter topics.
hmmmm.
how does it feel to have the best beau in the woild?
*David laughs - a genuine sound that catches even him off guard.*
It is very nice. He is the kindest, bravest boy I know. I am sure he know this, but I am rather fond of his face - his smile, especially - and his voice. I daresay my family may like him better than they do me.
aw, don’t lie!
I'm not!
If I cannot bring myself to lie about the headlines, what makes you think I would be able to lie about this?
He laughs.
makin’ my head big with all o’ the compliments!
*Davey lightly shoves Jack with his shoulder.*
I had nothing to do with you gaining a big head - you already had one!
did not!
Jack laughs.
Did too!
stop it, ya’ll make me blush!
Perhaps that was my intention.
Jack laughs.
aw, shuddup.
Are you really asking the Walking Mouth to be quiet?
Jack blushes a little.
well-
Well what?
*Davey pokes Jack playfully.*
…i give uppp…
Why, you haven't even tried!
Surely the leader of Manhattan, the comrade of Governor Roosevelt, the striker who brought Pulitzer to his knees can do better than this?
i can’t fight with ya! drives me mad!
Oh, alright then.
Ask me another question?
has esther taught ya to cook or do ya expect me to do all the cookin’?
*Davey scoffs, lightly shoving Jack yet again.*
I... can cook - enough to not starve at the very least. It's mostly science, math, and memorization, isn't it?
since when was math n science in cookin’?
Was... it not?
uhhh. i don’t use any o’ that…
i measure with me soul!
But... how? I mean, Imma does the same - I suppose all mothers do - but I've never been great with vagueness.
when ya makin’ eggs n ya wanna season ‘em, ya grab whateva ya reckon would make it taste good n ya sprinkle it on.
Very... specific.
How often do you cook?
‘s called n example, sweetheart.
wheneva kloppman lets me into the kitchen-so ‘round twice a month.
Right- right, yes. Of course. An example.
I was trying for... sarcasm? I reckon it didn't come out right.
Um, anyhow, do you cook for everyone or just yourself?
as many as we got ingredients for-i try to get to the littleuns at least, for sure.
That is very kind of you. What do you make? Not just eggs, I hope.
usually i make whateva we got-but usually, that be potatoes, maybeee meat. sometimes i make empanadas.
What are empanadas?
darlin’, ya gotta try ‘em! i oughta bring some ova one o’ these days.
Oh, please do not feel obligated to - they do sound delicious, though.
*Les hugs David’s legs, crying*
D-David! one of the uglancy brothers pushed me off a statue I-I was climbing and I can’t find touchy J-Jacky anywhere! Wahhhh
( @totallynotles )
*David crouches down, pulling Les into a hug.*
Shhh- shhh, you're alright. Does anything hurt?
M-my E-Ed!
Oh, Lesham... let me take a look.
*Davey pulls back, gently running his hands over Les's skull, trying to feel for any bumps.*
Tell me if I touch anywhere that hurts particularly so. Did you hit your head as you fell?
I hit my ‘ed on the hand of the statue I was climbing and the hand broke!
BAHH!
Well, destruction of public property is a problem we will ignore for now.
I don't feel anything wrong with your head in particular, but I know bumps to it are quite dangerous. Do you think you hurt enough to warrant a trip back home to Imma?
No I don’t want imma to be mad! again…
Touchy Jackie said I have a big solf head so my head probably just went BONG!!
Firstly, I am sure Imma would not be irked. I do hope you are aware that she cares for you - in fact, I'm quite sure you are the favorite of the three of us.
Secondly, please do not refer to Jack as that. That is an awful nickname, even by my standards.
Thirdly, Jack said what about your head? Heavens, you really aren't making much sense. Does your head seem to hurt on the outside or the inside, Les? More like a scrape or a headache?
He said my ‘Ed was big and round and solf and rock hard at the same time!
When it hit the ground it went BONG!!!
...Lesham, please, speak plainly.
At this moment, I do not care what Jack said concerning the firmness your head. I simply want to know in what manner it hurts.
This part! And this part, and this part!
*les points to random parts of his head*
Can heads really go BONG?
*Davey lets out a slightly exasperated sigh, grabbing Les's hands and holding them still.*
Truthfully? I have no notion whether a head is capable of making such a sound. From what I recall of that theater rally the Bulls broke up, the sound of a head being struck was more of a crack.
It didn’t crack! The ugly’s laughter was too loud so I couldn’t hear anything!
Ah...
How badly do you hurt, Les? And please, speak in simple terms. Personally, I really would like to have someone else look at it- Imma, or if that option seems terribly unpleasant, perhaps Mr. Kloppman? Even Jack or Racetrack, if you should choose.
*Davey smiles reassuringly, carefully and very lightly tapping Les's forehead with his knuckles.*
I would hate for that smart noggin to be damaged.
Not too bad… Ohhh! I wanna see Jackie! I haven’t seen him since he came up on our fire escape last night!
I’m still very smart actually! Ask me a smart question and I’ll answer it!

...alright.
If I were to multiply twelve by eleven, what would I get?
You have learned multiplication, right? To be frank, I have forgotten what they teach you at this age...
132! I did that in my mind! It’s called… math mind!
I came up with it last night when you and Jackie were bumping shoulders!
*David smiles, brushing a strand of Les's hair out of his face.*
Yes, one-hundred thirty-two is correct. That was very clever of you. However, please stop watching Jack and I.
Or, at least, make us aware of your presence.
Yay! I’m so very telligent!
Okay I will…😈
...I dislike that expression you are making. I know it means mischief.
Really, are we so loud that you cannot ignore us and go back to sleep?
Me? Mischief? Never!
Yes! You’re very loud and I like eavesdropping so I can’t go back to sleep! 
You subsist off mischief. I believe it is a large part of your diet.
I apologize for being too loud - however, I would prefer you interrupt us than eavesdrop.
How can I eat mischief?
It’s not an edible item!
It was a- nevermind.
I apologize. Yes, you are right - you cannot eat mischief. You do, nonetheless, commit quite the amount.
No, I don’t…
Name one ischief thing I’ve done!
You drew a comic about your pies, Jack, and I.
davey, darlin’, do not eat the damn pie.
(@ask-jackk)
I had established that, but thank you for the endorsement.
May I ask why the sudden definite recommendation though? Les had told me that you had baked it together and you seem to be a mostly competent chief in the majority of cases.
les insisted, n ya know how he gets! can’t say naw to ‘im! n if there’s one thing in the kitchen i can’t do, it’s bake.
*David laughs quietly at the admission.*
Where did you two even get the ingredients for that pie?
les had some dough. i told ‘im to get chocolates! swear!
Why did he have dough? Was the initial plan to make a chocolate pie?
sellin’ papes, he says. n naw-i tell ‘im, david likes chocolate! get chocolate! but NAWWW the kid got his heart set on molasses! if there was a flood of molasses he’d simply eat it all!
Oh - dough as in money, not the baking sort. Well, that does make a bit more sense, I suppose. I had quite the picture of him going about his shopping with a lump of unbaked dough in hand.
He has never shown any great interest in molasses before now… I wonder what put the notion into his head.
i dunno. kids, crazy lil’ ones!
I have half a mind to hand him off to you for a week or so! He would most certainly enjoy it.
don’t! ya ima would kill me.
I mean it in jest, of course, but it would be amusing.
And yes, Imma would most certainly... disapprove. She does like you, though, so I doubt death would be her first act. Perhaps just a stern talking to, though I bet I would be getting one first.
a stern talkin’ to is a sure pipeline to death!
Not likely in our household, but perhaps Imma will make an exception for us.
i’s too young to die :(
Yes- yes, you are. In fact, I think you should try immortality.
then ya better try it with me, love!
All our friends ought to at least attempt it.
indeed. n medda n kloppman!
And my parents.
n lil les.
Sarah and the cat who haunts the alley behind our home and greatly dislikes me.
kath n spot.
Are Katherine and Spot not included in the friends catagory?
kath, yeah. spot…iffy.
I don't believe you have ever mentioned why you and Spot are "iffy" - would you tell me?
we never really got ‘long. he…he said some shit ‘bout michael. after. ‘pologized, but still.
Oh...
Do you remember when Race moved to Brooklyn? Was that one of the reasons why you were so angry?
i guess.
Are you still angry at him- or, well, them?
…it’s faded.
not at race, anyways, but spot…
i don’t reckon i’ll eva really get ‘long with ‘im.
That's alright. I don't reckon everyone will ever be getting along with everybody anyhow.
yeah.
…ya used reckon!
Jack grins.
Did I really? I must be picking up some of the words you oft use.
aye! youse a true newsie now!
I'm not sure about that- not just yet. I don't sell half as much as the rest of you.
Anyhow, it seems rather unfair that I am the one picking up words from your vernacular. Shouldn't it go both ways?
‘cause ya dead set on honesty, sweetheart!
if i talk real fancypants like ya kloppman would reckon i’ve been possessed n i really hate bein’ exorcised.
I am not set on honesty; I simply prefer not to go about pretending I have the plague just to sell a pape. It always leaves me feeling a bit guilty-
I beg your pardon- you've been exorcised before?
Jack rubs his eyes.
yeah, n wouldn’t do it again.
Who tried to exorcised you?
who’d ya think?
*David sighs, pressing up against Jack.*
I had hoped...
Heavens, Jack. I'm sorry.
’s all over now, darlin’.
he’s far gone now.
He's still in New York City- still in Manhattan, Jack.
They ought to bring back exiles. Send Snyder off to some barren, soulless rock where he can never again do harm to another soul.
yeah.
*Davey pulls Jack into a hug, sighing.*
I really must stop driving conversations into such a direction.
’s fine, love.
He presses a kiss to David’s forehead.
Why don't you ask me a question this time? You ought to be better at leading this conversation to lighter topics.
hmmmm.
how does it feel to have the best beau in the woild?
*David laughs - a genuine sound that catches even him off guard.*
It is very nice. He is the kindest, bravest boy I know. I am sure he know this, but I am rather fond of his face - his smile, especially - and his voice. I daresay my family may like him better than they do me.
aw, don’t lie!
I'm not!
If I cannot bring myself to lie about the headlines, what makes you think I would be able to lie about this?
He laughs.
makin’ my head big with all o’ the compliments!
*Davey lightly shoves Jack with his shoulder.*
I had nothing to do with you gaining a big head - you already had one!
did not!
Jack laughs.
Did too!
stop it, ya’ll make me blush!
Perhaps that was my intention.
Jack laughs.
aw, shuddup.
Are you really asking the Walking Mouth to be quiet?
Jack blushes a little.
well-
Well what?
*Davey pokes Jack playfully.*
…i give uppp…
Why, you haven't even tried!
Surely the leader of Manhattan, the comrade of Governor Roosevelt, the striker who brought Pulitzer to his knees can do better than this?
i can’t fight with ya! drives me mad!
Oh, alright then.
Ask me another question?
has esther taught ya to cook or do ya expect me to do all the cookin’?
*Davey scoffs, lightly shoving Jack yet again.*
I... can cook - enough to not starve at the very least. It's mostly science, math, and memorization, isn't it?
since when was math n science in cookin’?
Was... it not?
uhhh. i don’t use any o’ that…
i measure with me soul!
But... how? I mean, Imma does the same - I suppose all mothers do - but I've never been great with vagueness.
when ya makin’ eggs n ya wanna season ‘em, ya grab whateva ya reckon would make it taste good n ya sprinkle it on.
Very... specific.
How often do you cook?
‘s called n example, sweetheart.
wheneva kloppman lets me into the kitchen-so ‘round twice a month.
Right- right, yes. Of course. An example.
I was trying for... sarcasm? I reckon it didn't come out right.
Um, anyhow, do you cook for everyone or just yourself?
as many as we got ingredients for-i try to get to the littleuns at least, for sure.
That is very kind of you. What do you make? Not just eggs, I hope.
usually i make whateva we got-but usually, that be potatoes, maybeee meat. sometimes i make empanadas.
What are empanadas?
