I WILL PROVIDE THE HAMS

A Large Ham and Supreme Grand Master of the Grey Knights. I'm here to talk shit and fite primarchs - and I've already rekt Mortarion. Ask me anything!

[askkaldordraigo]

I’m here to talk shit and fite Primarchs

and I’ve already rekt @ask-mortarion-the-death-lord

[askjenetiakrole]

RIP John Blanche (1948-2026)

His contribution to the grimdark aesthetic of the far future can scarce be overstated. May he rest in the peace that does not exist among the stars.

Art from Visions of Heresy

[wh40kartwork]

John Blanche has died. RIP.

[askkaldordraigo]

*leaves a lovingly prepared ham steak in the shape of the Grey Knights sigil at the Supreme Grand Master's warp-doorstep. The words "Hams for the Ham God" are etched into the plate*

*Then makes a hasty, tactical retreat*

“Why are you bringing me hams? I will provide the hams!”

[cursed-40k-thoughts]

Imagine being a humble daemon minding business as usual rampaging and such, and then there are shiny silver and gold lights and bam now there are grey knights AND custodians everywhere in full force with the masters of BOTH organizations. Worst. Day. Ever.

You're walking through the warp There's no one around You’re doing daemon things Out of the corner of your eye you spot him Kaldor Draigo

He's following you About thirty feet back He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint He's gaining on you Kaldor Draigo

You're looking for your warp portal But you're all turned around He's almost upon you now And you can see there's blood on his face! By the dark gods, there's blood everywhere!

[askkaldordraigo]

*claps*

[askkaldordraigo]

*THE SUN*

[askkaldordraigo]

ORDOS DRAIGOS?

[askkonradcurze]

[bossnass40k]

@askkaldordraigo Meesa think yousa no match for dat bombad mackineek.

[askkaldordraigo]

“This technological terror is insignificant next to the power of the Emperor.”

[askkonradcurze]

[screamingatthevoid]

Mortarion’s Valentine

(Art: Mortarion’s Heart by Jon Sullivan)

[cursed-40k-thoughts]

Kaldor Draigo yells “Deus Vult” when he nuts. Every time.

[askbelisarius-cawl]

///Primaris Kaldor Draigo is something I want to see GW produce. No, I don’t accept criticism. 

[askkaldordraigo]

“Make it happen, Cawl.”

[cathylimart]

Ok but why calling Primarchs by numbers behind their back and not just name projects with their names unless you actively try to distance yourself emotionally

[cathylimart]

No wait I have a better idea, have you seen that post about lady adopting a cat named “trashbag” in which she explained that vets call rescue animals with stupid nonsensical names so they won’t get so attached to them.

Thats why all primarch names are all random references

[science-jumps]

But I thought they were named / took names when they landed on their conveniently themed planets

[incorrect-primarchs-quotes]

@science-jumps actually the Emperor had already given them their names when they were born, before chaos fucked shit up

[science-jumps]

Unless you can point out otherwise, a couple of them are explicitly stated to have been named by their adoptive families, such as the Lion and Mortarion.

[incorrect-primarchs-quotes]

First example that came to my mind is when the Emperor meets for the first time Konrad Curze. While living on Nostramo nobody gave him a name, his people would just call him Night Hauter. When the Emperor came, He called him by the name He had given to him and Konrad even refused to be called like that

[ejct1]

Plus I’m pretty sure somewhere in the lore (might be shitty lore) that the Grey Knights defeated Daemon Primarch Mortarion by using the name Emps intended for him because it’s his “true” name

[incorrect-primarchs-quotes]

Yes. The Grey Knight who defeated Mortarion was Kaldor Draigo

[askkaldordraigo]

“His true name is Stinkboy Loser.”

[screamingatthevoid]

Mortarion’s Valentine

(Art: Mortarion’s Heart by Jon Sullivan)

[1234512345232w345-deactivated20]

everybody gangsta till the gellar field fails

This boi stays gansta when it happens;

[beans345-deactivated20211127]

The holy trinity of daemon destruction

[inthegrimdarkness]

If you ever feel useless

Remember that immortal, unkillable daemon primarchs, have bodyguards

[ask-valerian-40k]

in their defence it’s probably mostly to protect against Kaldor Draigo