I'm rich, you know.

Quite the romantic scene, isn't it? You, me, the rampaging anonymous spitting their caustic goo... Please, ladies, one at a time. And I beg of you - no inquiries about a certain feline-related fanciness controversy, for my sake.

[asklordfaren]

"Which Legendary weapon would you like to have..?"

I am a Swordsmaster who fights for the Queen, after all! Anise, I’m waiting for my invite.

[asklordfaren]

Im richer you know.

I very much doubt that.

[asklordfaren]

Caudecus Through the Ages

((In honor of this blog coming back, have an ask we never posted from back in the day! Caudecus’s relationship with Faren, drawn long before Bongo ever had a canon model.))

[asklordfaren]

I’m back, you know. Ask away.

[asklordfaren]

Gods, it's been almost two weeks and my neck is still sore from that bobblehead incident...I'm too fancy for this.

[asklordfaren]

"We're you happy or sad that Scarlet is dead? If so be honest with me here." The doc cross his arm. "Also she is dead yes, but what is your reaction since there might be a new threat coming to Tyria."

If any new threats are to come to Tyria, I’m not all too concerned—I’ve got a wonderful friend (or several) who is capable of saving the world all on their own.

As for me, I’m quite willing to provide some help with the latest apocalyptic event Tyria must face. Old Bongo the One-Eyed didn’t call me his absolute most treasured student for nothing! I’m more than capable on the battlefield. Vigor, might, and all that!

[asklordfaren]

Coach: I can go for a... BBQ bacon burger, large order of fries, orange soda with no ice and a piece of hot apple pie!

[asklordfaren]

Marjory want to kill you. What do you do?!

Marjory didn't seem to like my cologne that much...I've no idea why, seeing as it's from the finest perfumers of Kryta. Regardless, I suppose not everyone can handle my lascivious scent. 

[asklordfaren]

Hmm... certainly, but my time is precious, so listen carefully! I won't be repeating it. I present to you, a guide to being rich--by me, your richest and most generous teacher, Lord Faren.

I admit it's not a method that can apply to everyone, but it's worked swimmingly for me thus far!

[asklordfaren]

Pretty-Boy-Swag!

[foppishaplomb]

A Crash Course in Farenology: The Lord Faren Collection

Proof of the best character in Guild Wars 2 as collected by me and Jen - as Tyria’s most faithful, dedicated and only professors of Farenology, if we don’t archive it, no one will (even though that’s terrible). The people need to know!! Or like, read the first couple of paragraphs and give up, anyway. This thing is long.

WARNING: VERY image heavy under the cut.

Read More

[asklordfaren]

I've got a little tid-bit you'll find Hilarious: A few female adventures actually pair Logan Thackery with Blood Legion's Tribune, Rytlock Brimstone.

Oh? Congratulations to the both of them, then! I scarcely know either of the gentlemen involved (in fact I have never even met Tribune Brimstone, for obvious reasons), so it’s hardly my business, but if they have managed to put their differences aside and reconnect on a more romantic level, then I wish them both very well!

[mogruith]

Lord Faren’s blog post reminded me how much I’d like to have his clothes.

I’m sorry, Faren, if this were Skyrim, I would have definitely murdered you for your clothes already.

[asklordfaren]

Understandable - I am remarkably fashionable, but I am willing to give you fashion tips for free, even though my time is nearly as precious as my codpiece is. However! Though I admit I am not familiar with the Sky-rim region (Canthan, maybe?), perhaps you should rethink such boorish stereotypes! Probably only half of the residents would kill you for your clothes at most.

[asklordfaren]

Mmmmmm... Sssstop it with your word they you say to us and nice ways that makes us want to love you more.

Honestly, I don't understand why I keep getting messages from the krait. I unsubscribed to their services eons ago! 

I must hire a lawyer at once.

[asklordfaren]

Is it hidden? Oh! Ha ha. Ahem. I have been to the Ossan Quarter many times! As one of Divinity's Reach's most affluent neighborhoods, the Ossan Quarter attracts many nobles! I've had visits here and there since I was a child; playdates with the children of my parents' political allies, shopping with the nannies, that sort of thing. By the time I got to be a teen-ager it was a very popular "date area" among my peers, so as you can imagine I saw a quite a bit of it!

I have some pleasant memories of the place, indeed.

I don't go as much these days, especially after the whole... er... debacle with the Hero of Shaemoor and the late Minister Zamon, but come to think of it I can't imagine why they sell such expensive goods right out in the open like that. I suppose it's testament to the wealth and safety of the area, or at least their skill at disguising the seedier elements. Well, Zamon did prove that fairly well, eh?

[asklordfaren]

I love youuuu! Will you marry me? :3

Ahaha! Uhh, I am deeply flattered, dear lady - or fellow, other, etc - but I must, regretfully, decline your most touching offer. A man like me must fly free! To tie myself down to one woman (fellow, other, etc) would be depriving Tyria of a wonderful joy as surely as Captain Thackeray deprives Divinity’s Reach of a solid sense of humor. Blah blah, quirky phrasing, egotistical comment, what? What??

A mysterious force is informing me someone has already called ‘dibs’? Apparently it’s the…. moderators? There’s hardly anything in the upper Salma District that could possibly need modera—

Lyssa guide me, this is nonsense. I must put my foot down! We are certainly never doing a meta ask again.

[asklordfaren]

¿Que piensa Faren sobre Logan y Reina Jennah ?

Eh? What’s this? I must apologize, as I only speak New Krytan, my friend. I picked up a few words of this and that from my lessons as a schoolboy, but no more than a tidbit of Old Krytan or an Elonian phrase or two.Odd, though. This doesn’t sound like any of those. I’m far from familiar with the language, but Canthan had rather more squiggly bits, and whatnot, didn’t it? …Hold on - “Logan” and “Jennah?” As in Queen Jennah, Gods save her? It must be, if the “Logan” is Captain Thackeray - this message was meant for the Queen! Dwayna’s pinfeathers, I gather it’s in code! I’ll have to turn this into the Shining Blade immediately!