For The Publick!

[askpiperwrite]

So have you seen the web swinging person? The one that crawl walls?

That... Doesn't sound real.

Isn't that the superpower of one of The Unstoppables? Nat would know more about that than me.

[askpiperwrite]

Hey Piper! What would you say your favorite color is?

Y'know, I dunno that I have one... It's hard to pick, what with all the-

Nah I'm kidding it's red.

Blue on a bad day...

[askpiperwrite]

I return; now with extra craving for The Truth-

Well, you’ll be happy to know the truth is everywhere! And if you need easy access, read the Publick! The truth is the only thing we print!

[askpiperwrite]

woah

been a while since I booted up this ol’ terminal

hold on while I blow some dust out of the wires

[askpiperwrite]

Hi, Piper! What's the news in Publick Occurences this time? Anything exciting? :D

Oh, y’know, the usual. The truth with a side of sarcasm. Although... Recently I’ve been hearing that south of the Commonwealth, in the West Virginia hills... somethin’s been running wild...

Wish I had the time to go investigate.

[askpiperwrite]

Hello, Piper!! 😊 Hey, did you happen to see my crate of Sugar Bombs around here? 🤔 I swear I put that crate near my door an hour ago, but it's not there anymore and I can't find it anywhere. 😯

Oh was it that crate of Sugar Bombs that Nat said was... Graciously donated to her, by the kind people of Diamond City, for her to eat all by herself and not share with her sister, because it was for her, Nat?

Yeah, it’s back there, by her little play area. There might be a box or two missing.

[askpiperwrite]

Considering coming to the Commonwealth. Any tips or tricks? Anything I should know? -Quinn-

Yeah, here’s a tip and/or trick: don’t.

Commonwealth ain’t exactly welcoming. If you can settle in somewhere, do that. But if you’re really deadset and headstrong on coming to the Commonwealth, your first stop should be Diamond City, followed by Bunker Hill, followed by Sanctuary. Always good stops. Not a whole lot special here, though...

I suppose maybe that comes from living here so long. Maybe I’m desensitized.

[askpiperwrite]

Whats your opinion on the nuka world slave trade?

Free them all. Kill the slavers. Kill the raiders.

Unless they’re ready to incorporate into civilization. Then they’re free to come to us.

[askpiperwrite]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

If you’re gonna scream, I suggest finding either Deacon or Hancock, who’ll scream with you, or go up to McDonough’s office. However, scream articles are over, since last month. You’re too late.

[askpiperwrite]

Piper, are you happy?

Happy? 

Yeah. I’m pretty happy.

[askpiperwrite]

I post about suffocating Blue for a few pens and you guys turn it into something else entirely, what the fuck.

Is this why I don’t get asks? Because everyone else scares everyone away?

[lookitsmorefandomtrash-deactiva]

No, you’re still perfect and I still want to kiss the heck out of you!

[askpiperwrite]

w...

what

[askpiperwrite]

I post about suffocating Blue for a few pens and you guys turn it into something else entirely, what the fuck.

Is this why I don’t get asks? Because everyone else scares everyone away?

[askpiperwrite]

Marry me

Wow, um... You know what? I won’t lie, I’m really impressed at the forwardness and the confidence.

But I’m going to have to gently decline. I don’t even know who you are.

[askpiperwrite]

“I would suffocate Blue in their sleep with a pillow if it meant I got a steady supply of functioning, NOT BROKEN PENS.”

[askhancock]

You do know there’s a simple solution for that right? That doesn’t involve killing Blue.

[askpiperwrite]

“Listen, I’m not going scouting in a pre-war pen factory for a lifetime of pens, tetanus, and radroach bites.”

[askhancock]

I was gonna say use a pencil, they still make em in diamond city.

[askpiperwrite]

“Now you’re talkin’ crazy, Hancock. I can’t print copies that are written in pencil, the graphite melts.”

[askpiperwrite]

“I would suffocate Blue in their sleep with a pillow if it meant I got a steady supply of functioning, NOT BROKEN PENS.”

[askhancock]

You do know there’s a simple solution for that right? That doesn’t involve killing Blue.

[askpiperwrite]

“Listen, I’m not going scouting in a pre-war pen factory for a lifetime of pens, tetanus, and radroach bites.”

[mojaveimpulses-archived]

“If someone pays me I’ll kiss a Molerat.”

[mojaveimpulses-archived]

“Are you saying I look like a Molerat?!”

[askpiperwrite]

“Smell like one, too. And have the habits of one. I mean, look at those whiskers.”

[askpiperwrite]

“I would suffocate Blue in their sleep with a pillow if it meant I got a steady supply of functioning, NOT BROKEN PENS.”