old-ass rp blog that hasnt been active in months

if youre here because of any posts i made (e.x. the solar system one, the gas station one, the fuckign bar of soap one) this is an rp blog and its an inactive rp blog sorry m8. my main's currently at abandonedshack. if youre here for rp's though i mean message me i'll be open to doing threads but let me tell you i havent used this blog in literal months.

[ouma-againstdickheads-receipts]

ouma goes by bumbo-the-transmed now

absolute clownery

[aromoji]

Forgot this user existed. Still up to the same old shit

[animefacialrecognitionsoftware01]

how fucking dumb does ur clown car need to be for the fuckin FAKE ACE BLOG to be the normal one

[regularlesbian]

me: *takes a long swig from a flask i was carrying in my purse* barkeep: ma'am no outside drinks are permitted me, hoarsely: this is flour

[geopsych]

Early part of the sunrise at Leaser Lake. 

I know tatarian honeysuckle, Lonicera tatarica, is invasive, but it looked pretty nice right then.

[pizzaback-deactivated20201011]

I hate how the stereotype is that dolphins are good and sharks are evil, when dolphins are so smart that they have the capacity for evil but sharks are simple fish who can only be true neutral, so even if a minority of dolphins are evil there are still more evil dolphins than sharks

[ninjachibi117]

shit’s heating up in the shark fandom

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

(txt) so then this dumb douchebag hands me a rock and is all, "hey do you know what rock this is?" (txt) and i'm like "its slate" and hes like "how do you know?" (txt) like buddy first of all im a fucking geologist with a phd in go fuck yourself you second rate yiffmonger (txt) second of all your waifu is shit (txt) and third of all WHY ASK IF YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER (txt) i dont understand the Heterosexuals. -mika asktheteamofscientists

asktheteamofscientists

[txt] first of all i’m p sure you’ve got the wrong number & i’m kinda wondering if i’m being shitposted @ rn it feels like it

[txt] second of all i fuckin feel u m8

[txt] The Heterosexuals frighten me

[asktheteamofscientists]

impassivespellbinder:

[txt] i’m sure that’d be hilarious if i knew what you were referring to.

[txt] I’m a Vilas, think like Veela from harry potter but with less bird monster and more demonic forty foot tall true form hidden under a pretty relatively human looking exterior.

[txt] ew no i hate children i’m glad i never was one.

(txt) i am incapable of producing a firstborn it is currently genetically Not Fucking Worth It bc it needs more test tube baby stuff (txt) we dont do that. (txt) but thats fuckin cool tho, the Vilas thing. (txt) u should totally drop the human form and turn into a fucking kaiju and wreck shit (txt) be godzilla!!!!!!!

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

[txt] i feel that tbh a vilas can only ever have one child and we’ve gotta be the ones to carry it and vilas cant breed together so it involves shapeshifting a fucking uterus into being from another species it’s really not worth it at all tbh [txt] I wish i could but like [txt] the true forms got some weird curse attached to it [txt] plus you’ve gotta have felt like true hatred or w/e to unlock it, like its some special feature in a game [txt] i can get parts of it like i can turn my arm into a huge clawed thing thats part of my true form so

[asktheteamofscientists]

(txt) you know what this means? (txt) this means godzilla arms. (txt) tokyo is no match for these guns 💪🏼😎

[grumpysweetheart]

[memewhore]

[tony-the-intelligent-goon]

I can’t tell what my favorite part is, but it’s either

scientists wasting budget and time to see if ants count their steps

the idea to put ants on stilts

there had to be a guy who made ant stilts and put them on the ants

confused ants

[vaighspersonal-deactivated20160]

OR  E. All of the above.

[tumorhead]

BUT WAIT THERES MORE!

Can mantids wear and see in 3D glasses? YES

THEY PUT LITTLE GLASSES ON MANTIDS

Do honey bees suffer from sleep deprivation? YES

Here is the BEE INSOMNIATOR.

They put MAGNETS ON BEES  and WIGGLED THEM TO KEEP THEM AWAKE

How do scales help snakes move?

Well they put SNAKES IN LITTLE SHIRTS to find out!

SHRIMPS ON A TREADMILL

biology is the greatest

[dragongirltitties]

bad and naughty children get put into the bee wiggler to atone for their sins

[trans-mouse]

The best thing about the ant one is that somebody clearly was like “Oh well ants probably count their steps” and that was just like… a thought that came into their head.

[whimsicalentropy]

THE BEE WIGGLER

[the-unreadable-jimanjikles]

This demonstrates that discovery requires madness.

[poiplefunguy]

gravity was discovered because Newton just so happened to have an apple fall on his napping ass what do you think science is

[magicaldeductions-deactivated20]

goddammit bill

[bajjii0]

Pinche bill

[snowysauropteryx]

Can you lick the science? An abbreviated list.

Genetics: Do not. Unless cheek swabs?

Chemistry: NO!!!!! DO NOT!!!!!!

Archaeology: Perhaps. But might be human bone.

Geology: Sometimes needed, sometimes dangerous 

Psychology: Best not.

Physics: ????????? How??????

Zoology: In zoology, science licks you. 

[seananmcguire]

Anthropology: Maybe ask first.

Herpetology: bad plan bad plan BAD PLAN

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

(txt) so then this dumb douchebag hands me a rock and is all, "hey do you know what rock this is?" (txt) and i'm like "its slate" and hes like "how do you know?" (txt) like buddy first of all im a fucking geologist with a phd in go fuck yourself you second rate yiffmonger (txt) second of all your waifu is shit (txt) and third of all WHY ASK IF YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER (txt) i dont understand the Heterosexuals. -mika asktheteamofscientists

asktheteamofscientists

[txt] first of all i’m p sure you’ve got the wrong number & i’m kinda wondering if i’m being shitposted @ rn it feels like it

[txt] second of all i fuckin feel u m8

[txt] The Heterosexuals frighten me

[asktheteamofscientists]

impassivespellbinder:

[txt] i’m sure that’d be hilarious if i knew what you were referring to.

[txt] I’m a Vilas, think like Veela from harry potter but with less bird monster and more demonic forty foot tall true form hidden under a pretty relatively human looking exterior.

[txt] ew no i hate children i’m glad i never was one.

(txt) i am incapable of producing a firstborn it is currently genetically Not Fucking Worth It bc it needs more test tube baby stuff (txt) we dont do that. (txt) but thats fuckin cool tho, the Vilas thing. (txt) u should totally drop the human form and turn into a fucking kaiju and wreck shit (txt) be godzilla!!!!!!!

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

(txt) so then this dumb douchebag hands me a rock and is all, "hey do you know what rock this is?" (txt) and i'm like "its slate" and hes like "how do you know?" (txt) like buddy first of all im a fucking geologist with a phd in go fuck yourself you second rate yiffmonger (txt) second of all your waifu is shit (txt) and third of all WHY ASK IF YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER (txt) i dont understand the Heterosexuals. -mika asktheteamofscientists

asktheteamofscientists

[txt] first of all i’m p sure you’ve got the wrong number & i’m kinda wondering if i’m being shitposted @ rn it feels like it

[txt] second of all i fuckin feel u m8

[txt] The Heterosexuals frighten me

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

asktheteamofscientists:

(txt) LMFAO (txt) gg UK (txt) theory: theyre all so angry because the uk is smol. size is in direct proportion to rage usually. (txt) i am a sciencer i know these things

[txt] pretty much yeah

[txt] i dont even know if sciencer is a real word or not

[asktheteamofscientists]

(txt) its not lol (txt) so are you like a fairy or do you just live under a rock. or both. do fairies live under rocks?

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

[txt] I’ve learned something then. [txt] I’m a faerie creature yes. Goblins live under rocks but not me, i live in a house.

[asktheteamofscientists]

(txt) life has many doors ed-boy (txt) shet. so wtf are u then? (txt) also if ur gunning for my firstborn i dont think you’ll get one im a cis lesbian dating another cis woman sorry m8

[wasteland-sniper-blog]

"... Eugene?" Ray, looking tired and worn the hell out, tilts his head and looks at Eugene with tired eyes. "I don't... What the hell are you doing, I took my meds again." He rubs his eyes, and sighs. "Guess you build up a tolerance for antipsychotics, or mine are just expired. Well, fuck if I'm going to be seen standing around having a conversation with the stairs again." He turns and heads back down the hallway, out of sight.

Eugene just stood there for a moment, his brain trying to process what had just happened. 

Had his boyfriend just acted like he wasn’t real? 

“Ray, where’re ya goin’? It’s me, I’m home…” He said, a bit of pleading in his voice. He knew Ray would be angry (probably livid), and he had every right to be, but this was just…painful. Following the smaller man into the next room, the taller Aussie tried again.

“I know yer probably more than pissed at me, an’ ya got all tha reasons in tha world to be tha’ way, but please Ray…jus’…talk to me for a moment.” 

[asktheteamofscientists]

  “Not actually a ring, just two studs. I’ll show you again when it’s day time.” He takes Eugene’s hands, and kisses his cheek.

“Thank you, ‘Gene. Now, c’mon, into the shower with you. I’ll get you a toothbrush, toothpaste, change of clothes…” He begins nudging him towards the bathroom down the hall. “My bathroom is a complete disaster so you aren’t allowed in until I can finish un-fucking it up.” He explains.

[wasteland-sniper-blog]

He nods happily, giving the smaller man a smile before speaking. 

“Thank ya, love. I probably need tha’ more than anythin’ else in tha world.” Eugene laughs as he follows Ray towards the bathroom, having to take smaller steps as not to get ahead of him. 

“Oh? Wha’s wrong with it?” 

[asktheteamofscientists]

Ray shrugs uncomfortably, biting his already scabbed over lip.

“... I had an episode,” he admits. “It wasn’t pretty. I’ve been cleaning it up, but it still looks like... Well.” He gives Eugene what would be a shrewd smile if he didn’t look positively haunted.

“Like a psycho had a mental breakdown in there.”

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

(txt) so then this dumb douchebag hands me a rock and is all, "hey do you know what rock this is?" (txt) and i'm like "its slate" and hes like "how do you know?" (txt) like buddy first of all im a fucking geologist with a phd in go fuck yourself you second rate yiffmonger (txt) second of all your waifu is shit (txt) and third of all WHY ASK IF YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER (txt) i dont understand the Heterosexuals. -mika asktheteamofscientists

asktheteamofscientists

[txt] first of all i’m p sure you’ve got the wrong number & i’m kinda wondering if i’m being shitposted @ rn it feels like it

[txt] second of all i fuckin feel u m8

[txt] The Heterosexuals frighten me

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

asktheteamofscientists:

(txt) LMFAO (txt) gg UK (txt) theory: theyre all so angry because the uk is smol. size is in direct proportion to rage usually. (txt) i am a sciencer i know these things

[txt] pretty much yeah

[txt] i dont even know if sciencer is a real word or not

[asktheteamofscientists]

(txt) its not lol (txt) so are you like a fairy or do you just live under a rock. or both. do fairies live under rocks?

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

(txt) so then this dumb douchebag hands me a rock and is all, "hey do you know what rock this is?" (txt) and i'm like "its slate" and hes like "how do you know?" (txt) like buddy first of all im a fucking geologist with a phd in go fuck yourself you second rate yiffmonger (txt) second of all your waifu is shit (txt) and third of all WHY ASK IF YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER (txt) i dont understand the Heterosexuals. -mika asktheteamofscientists

asktheteamofscientists

[txt] first of all i’m p sure you’ve got the wrong number & i’m kinda wondering if i’m being shitposted @ rn it feels like it

[txt] second of all i fuckin feel u m8

[txt] The Heterosexuals frighten me

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

fancypantsmagicalbullshit:

(txt) everyone from the uk is obsessed with death for fuck’s sake. (txt) like okay will dissects dead things and keeps them in jars  (txt) matt repeatedly flips death the bird and dares it to fuck with him (txt) wills boyfriend and him go grave robbing (txt) and this one weird brit-secretly-from-space-illuminati-confirm is Sort Of From There (txt) also ppl get salty af if u mix up scotland and england but have 0 problem treating the american south like one blob of redneck bullshit like excuse u hoe we have very distinct flavors of redneck bullshit (txt) >:(c

[txt] i think it’s because it’s the only thing they have to look forward to.

[txt] yeah the irish and scottish dont want anything to do with england and wales is like hufflepuff so

[txt] :3c

[asktheteamofscientists]

(txt) LMFAO (txt) gg UK (txt) theory: theyre all so angry because the uk is smol. size is in direct proportion to rage usually. (txt) i am a sciencer i know these things

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

(txt) so then this dumb douchebag hands me a rock and is all, "hey do you know what rock this is?" (txt) and i'm like "its slate" and hes like "how do you know?" (txt) like buddy first of all im a fucking geologist with a phd in go fuck yourself you second rate yiffmonger (txt) second of all your waifu is shit (txt) and third of all WHY ASK IF YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER (txt) i dont understand the Heterosexuals. -mika asktheteamofscientists

asktheteamofscientists

[txt] first of all i’m p sure you’ve got the wrong number & i’m kinda wondering if i’m being shitposted @ rn it feels like it

[txt] second of all i fuckin feel u m8

[txt] The Heterosexuals frighten me

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

asktheteamofscientists:

(txt) SHIT this is the wrong number (txt) my girlfriend changed her phone # and i keep losing my phones so i just have hers memorized BUT (txt) well fuck whatever i already started yelling about this fucking shit ass motherfucker and goddamn rocks (txt) you gotta commit to this shit (txt) like this fucking idiot ok hes one of the interns’ boyfriends and shes TRYING to dump him but hes just Not doing it (txt) and matt says i cant fuckin shoot him so whats the point (txt) if he shows up again im just gonna fucking shove a fossil up his ass. (txt) honestly. (txt) any advice, mystery phone number

[txt] i feel you bruh

[txt] true tho. im invested in this story now

[txt] as for my advice, murder usually works, I can raise his corpse as a mindless zombie slave afterwards if you’d like

[asktheteamofscientists]

(txt) cant lose our grants ellen AND matt would have my severed tits on a platter. ew. (txt) appreciate the offer tho (txt) i told him it was because of how the rock separates into plates and the color which is true but still like? trust my judgement abt rocks. (txt) also ur a necromancer thats cool. do u live in england or smth?

[impassivespellbinder-deactivate]

(txt) so then this dumb douchebag hands me a rock and is all, "hey do you know what rock this is?" (txt) and i'm like "its slate" and hes like "how do you know?" (txt) like buddy first of all im a fucking geologist with a phd in go fuck yourself you second rate yiffmonger (txt) second of all your waifu is shit (txt) and third of all WHY ASK IF YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER (txt) i dont understand the Heterosexuals. -mika asktheteamofscientists

asktheteamofscientists

[txt] first of all i’m p sure you’ve got the wrong number & i’m kinda wondering if i’m being shitposted @ rn it feels like it

[txt] second of all i fuckin feel u m8

[txt] The Heterosexuals frighten me

[asktheteamofscientists]

(txt) SHIT this is the wrong number (txt) my girlfriend changed her phone # and i keep losing my phones so i just have hers memorized BUT (txt) well fuck whatever i already started yelling about this fucking shit ass motherfucker and goddamn rocks (txt) you gotta commit to this shit (txt) like this fucking idiot ok hes one of the interns’ boyfriends and shes TRYING to dump him but hes just Not doing it (txt) and matt says i cant fuckin shoot him so whats the point (txt) if he shows up again im just gonna fucking shove a fossil up his ass. (txt) honestly. (txt) any advice, mystery phone number

[audrocur-deactivated20221128]

real estate agent: so what kind of property are you looking for?

me: a simple cave with fewer goblins than most