they call me the problem avoider for reasons i don't really wanna think about right now
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@aspiringwriter1111
they call me the problem avoider for reasons i don't really wanna think about right now
you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself
and the wip is done! :3 (now back to work on comms)
“there’s an ai tool for that” okay ?? there’s probably an ed sheeran song for it too who gives a fuck
hey did ya'll know that ed sheeran is working on a series of 6 albums named after media player buttons and the first one released last year and the last one is to be released posthumously on the day that he dies
That doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about Ed Sheeran to prove otherwise
…huh
New reason to live unlocked.
“bits to use in everyday conversations”
my toddler is 3 years old and wont eat anything other than fine porterhouse steaks and sweet port wine
you need to discipline your child. port is a horrible choice for the main course and wildly clashes with a rich béarnaise.
dude hes three….
And uncultured. Get a new child
YOU are an intersex ally!
The answer is always yes
I highly recommend you find yourself a clingy (healthy) lovey dovey partner who's super excited about you. life is too short to spend it with someone who act like showing love is a chore
Having a "stupider people have done this" attitude about the things you want to do can open so many doors
my friend's puppy has baffling levels of attitude for someone who's only been around for a handful of months. he understands concepts like deceit and civil disobedience and other things i didn't fully grasp until well into my 20s. this guy doesn't even know the seasons loop yet. he's probably like okay spring. what's next. some other new bullshit i bet
Ok so lemme get this straight the boys get advertised their body weight in protein powder and girls are told to get by on uncooked foliage and I’m supposed to believe that the observed differences in gender are strictly because of sex chromosomes with no cultural influence at all uh huh sure hey buddy what kind of idiot
my friend's puppy has baffling levels of attitude for someone who's only been around for a handful of months. he understands concepts like deceit and civil disobedience and other things i didn't fully grasp until well into my 20s. this guy doesn't even know the seasons loop yet. he's probably like okay spring. what's next. some other new bullshit i bet
reblog to pet the sad cat __ /> フ | _ _ l /` ミ_xノ / | / ヽ ノ │ | | | / ̄| | | | | ( ̄ヽ__ヽ_)__) \二つ
there is a stripper pole in my attic. i saw it in a dumpster one day, and i went, shit, this is exactly the kind of thing my wife would want. and i didnt really want it in the house, what with it being a used stripper pole lightly seasoned with dumpster juice, but i mentally decided that if she were to see it and ask for it, i would say she could have it, and then sure enough, later that evening, she went soooo baaaaaaaabs there's this thing by the dumpster and i want it but i get it if you don't want it in the house but i have to show it to you- and i went, no you dont, you can have the pole, and that was the most surprised i have ever made her look. even compared to the day when i proposed to her, which she was prepared enough that we both knew she would say yes, and she could also get her hair done up and have a cute outfit, but not so prepared that she was not fucking flabbergasted by the 12 empty decoy ringboxes i sprung on her. i handed her so many decoy ring boxes that day. still one of the funniest things i've ever done to her.
anyway we like pacing around together and ranting in the attic but sometimes instead of pacing one of us will just hang on the pole and spin, and the other person will watch on the beanbag, which makes for these really goofy conversations where the person on the bag will say something that gets the other persons goat, such as, hypothetically, that xylophones do not belong in rock music, and then the other person will go on a tirade about this, but they'll actually only be facing the Hot Take Speaker half of the time, what because of the pole, so the response will sound something like
I can't believe
you would even suggest such
a stupid opinion. You've
been to a Danny Elfman
concert! How can you
have heard Oingo Boingo
live and say with a straight face
that they alone do not justify
rock and roll xylophones
and then that person will continue until they get too dizzy, then they'll get off the pole, and by unspoken agreement, the person on the bag will get up and trade places with them to deliver their rebuttal while also spinning and it just creates this sort of crazy strip-court lawyers debating absolute nonsense for no reason kind of vibe that frankly just really does it for us.
i don't really have any marriage advice for this i guess its just a look at what being married can look like. i thought that being married would involve a lot more stuff like carving the turkey, or barbecuing, or watching the sunset, and if id known how much time it would involve arguing for xylphones in rock music while spinning upside down i might have prepared for it a little differently.
More Stowaway AU
Pacifica dynamics with each Grunkle. Happy late Father’s Day and birthday to the grunks!
this is going to be difficult -> i am capable of doing difficult things -> i have done everything prior to this moment -> this difficulty will soon be proof of capability