Astrid's Place

a place for my writing, unfiltered

[astridsplace]

Being an Ally

I am really committed to being a better ally for people of colour

Reading and listening to people of colour, specifically workers of colour, not just those class traitors who have joined the ruling class, and are now bosses

Making friends with people you wouldn't usually

Maintaining friendships you might not usually

Including people in our spaces and groups who are new, trying to help them feel comfortable

Being aware of the default state of this system being racism, all people are conditioned to be racist and have a lot of unlearning to do. We cannot ignore it and pretend it is solved.

People of colour do not need a white saviour to speak for them, to save them, or to tell their stories: they can do all of that and are doing all of that if you listen. You can use your privilege to share and amplify and stand with what they are already doing and saying.

Being open to being wrong. Knowing I will make mistakes, and some people will not forgive me or want to continue a relationship with me afterwards, or the same kind of relationship, and that can be very difficult and confusing. It may seem really sudden and unexpected. I accept their decisions. I know I am innately lovable. I will never abandon myself. I will be okay, and each day I get wiser. I know I am strong enough to keep going and keeping showing up with love anyway.

Knowing that people of colour often have trauma, don't take it to heart if they seem wary. Respect people's boundaries and choices. You are not entitled to anything from them, especially if you have no existing relationship!

Get comfortable with being uncomfortable, gradually expand where and who I feel comfortable with

Call out racism for what it is, when you see it. It's as simple as saying "that's so racist."

Be kind to myself and give myself grace. These things take time. Building relationships take time. I'm never going to be perfect. Love, accept, and trust myself.

This also means laughing at myself, and knowing when I get critiqued or joked about, it is because someone feels safe with me to be very direct and truthful. That is actually a blessing and an honour and a gift. That is something to be grateful for.

[astridsplace]

stereotypes

stereotypes tend to hover around similar concepts regardless of what group they're about. they paint an entire community as inherently one thing. we're conditioned to think them and reproduce them in our conversations and art.

sex: as sexy and beautiful or non-sexual and repulsive, as a fetish or kink

exoticism: like another species: foreign, weird, and novel, especially when it comes to hard culture, like food, clothes and art

danger, violence and crime: as scary villains and criminals, or submissive victims in need of saving, as okay to police, kill and jail

work: as suited to certain jobs, as okay to hyper-exploit with low pay and terrible conditions

drugs and alcohol: as addicts and abusers

money: as rich, clean, powerful and aspirational or poor, unclean, weak, and homeless

gender roles: as feminised or masculined

intelligence and education: as superior, academic and intelligent or inferior, stupid and uneducated

emotional expression: as more emotional or more rational

civilisation: as animalistic, closer to nature, or less civilised

all of these are myths spread by media, used to control and oppress communities of people, to justify the specific role they are forced to play within capitalism.

they erase the material reasons behind the ideas, replacing the truth with a message that "that's just how those people are naturally": the truth that colonialism has led to unequal distributions in wealth across countries becomes "brazilian people are poor", or the truth that job discrimination has historically led a disproprotionate number of trans women to be pushed into sex work becomes "trans women are sex workers"

[astridsplace]

writing affirmations

I trust my writing. I believe in my writing. I accept my writing with all its flaws.

I trust myself. I love myself. I accept myself with all my flaws.

If other people's works are lovable and worth sharing with their flaws, so are mine.

If other people are lovable with their flaws, so am I.

[astridsplace]

okay I'm baaack, I took a break lol cause I started overthinking the things I post and the (potentially negative) impact they could have, but now I'm just gonna post what I want again

I had a mild existential crisis and thought about what might happen if I died tomorrow, and I didn't want the things I've written to go to waste

so I'm just gonna slowly post stuff when I feel like it

[astridsplace]

in honour of hussie saying the kids were definitely not black, here are some black homestuck kids

[astridsplace]

so I heard a gnarly parody and it made me think of them this post has an audience of zero but here's dani and jove (the third and fourth one) talking about gnarly

DANI: we’ll be in a session tonight??? game game. oh we’re staying in tonight??? game game. oh my god this game is so lit, congratulations!!! now we be like game. game game game game game.

DANI: did you get the hint?

JOVE: Hm, your hint is so deeply enshrouded in layers of clever encryption it is difficult for me to wrap my mind around what you might be referring to. Some modern reference slipping by me, perhaps?

DANI: i meant about the game we’re gonna play

DANI: the reference doesn’t matter, that one was for me

JOVE: Ah, but you have my curious piqued now. The rhythm, the lyricism of this reference of yours is quite alluring. I wish to hear more, if I may.

DANI: okay fine, but only if we can play the game soon

DANI: this is what I get for trying to have fun

DANI: it’s gnarly by katseye

DANI: I can’t believe you haven’t heard of it god you’re so lame

JOVE: If it truly is such an influential song, I must culture myself.

JOVE: One moment, please. I am purveying my encyclopedias to educate myself on this “Gnarly”.

DANI: okay but don’t take too long!!

JOVE: I have returned. Of course, you refer to that famed sextet of bards, The Feline’s Retina. They may just be beginning their career, but they are already world-renowned for their exquisite lyricism and sensational performance ability.

DANI: yeah, they’re cool, right? idk how they move like that but I wanna be them so badddd

DANI: ugh and they're so goddamn hot

DANI: just one chance, lara, one chance!!!

JOVE: I have procured the track, and am listening to the melody on my sonograph.

JOVE: Oh my. Danielle.

JOVE: This sonnet is Exquisite.

DANI: right?

JOVE: Oh my lord the new rhythm. Quite exquisite.

JOVE: Oh my heavens, is this reality?

DANI: yuuup

JOVE: Aye, it is stirring my memory.

JOVE: We have an appointment tonight. Kin kin. Travelling for excursion tonight? Kin kin.

JOVE: Oh my stars, this poetry is quite explosive, cheers for thine!

JOVE: Now we are that of kin. Kin kin kin kin kin.

DANI: you get it!!

JOVE: Exquisite. all is exquisite.

JOVE: I find myself moving to this incredible display of auditory and creative genius, quite without meaning to. Thank you for enlightening me.

DANI: ayyy I know that’s right, anytime

DANI: now game?

JOVE: Yes, game.

[astridsplace]

black rose cause rose is black

[astridsplace]

in honour of hussie saying the kids were definitely not black, here are some black homestuck kids

[astridsplace]

black dave cause dave is black

[astridsplace]

I’m quitting my teaching degree. I love actual learning, not the education system. not the way capitalism has commodified and weaponised a natural and enjoyable part of life to indoctrinate children and force teenagers to obey. it actually is that bad.

my identity is much more than what I do for work. learning is much more than what happens in a classroom. I will keep on learning, and I will keep on teaching. your certification means nothing.

[astridsplace]

gender, sexism and god tier class in homestuck

a chart of the gendered connotations of words used for homestuck classes

analysis under the read more!

this chart is useful to talk about the representations of gender in homestuck when it comes to class archetypes. I wanted to explore the way gender relates to classpect. especially when it comes to the treatment of women in homestuck. disclaimer: fem is not the same as female, masc is not the same as male, gender is a spectrum.

gender roles: the gender binary and restrictive gender roles are reinforced as universally (multi-versally?) true, in the game world of sburb. classes are heavily coded as masculine or feminine with not only their names, but their costuming.

passive women: femininity is repeatedly conflated with passivity. the most passive class is gendered fem: muse. seer, and sylph, two more of the most passive classes are coded fem. maid, as well, is coded fem, and defined by service to another in an way that is disempowering and miserable for the maid. seers and sylphs are also repeatedly punished by the narrative for stepping out of line and taking on a more active role (see rose grimdark and aranea game over).

active women: thieves are coded fem (by homestuck, not in the larger world) and explicitly are stated to be very active. but this active role in the story almost always takes the form of selfishness and villainy. what is this saying about women? witches have a negative connotation in the wider world, but in homestuck jade is given a lot of agency and seen in a sympathetic light, at least most of the time (if we ignore the epilogues). it kinda makes us come away with the idea that "assertive women bad".

negative archetypes for men: there are, of course, equally negative stereotypes for male characters. passive useless manchild pages, and dominating, villainous princes. bard, a less gendered word in real life, is gendered masc, with a heavily negative representation. very similar to those of women. does this even it out? I would say because these negative stereotypes of women exist in context, and reinforce the existing lies of patriarchy, they're worse. the male representations seem to me more like critiques of the ways gendered socialisation shapes and harms men.

genderless classes?: what about the classes with less heavily gender connotations? rogues and mages. other than roxy, beloved by many, these characters have an almost trivial role in the story and are very underexplored. roxy shows that exploration of our existence outside of gender are much more interesting and popular.

how can we make this more radical? classpect used to be something I loved, but looking back on it in 2025 as a trans person, I see big problems. this whole system of putting people into rigid, narrow, archaic, and permanent boxes should be thrown out. the idea of your superpowers changing depending on what gender role you inhabit is... a choice. there is no room for fluidity. something that may have been appealing to young trans people about this system is that there are 12 genders instead of just two. and that we get to pick, they're not just assigned to us. but we're still in boxes.

there's also the aspect of class (in the real world sense here). all people's identities in homestuck are defined as individuals, by their relation to a ruler (the lord). they exist, divided, to serve their a force outside of them that actually stands to benefit, instead of fighting for their collective interests.

these are interesting narrative elements only so much as we get to strain against and revolt against them, and find freer ways of defining ourselves. gender and class should be abolished. gender is only real in the ways that we have made it real. we should focus on what unites us rather than what divides us.

[astridsplace]

aspects as game elements

time: rules, mechanics, constraints, grinding, fps

space: setting, ui, controls, simulation

light: the main quest, goals, tutorials, cutscenes, progression, story games

void: glitches, bugs, speed running, un-intended playstyles, skipping story

breath: open world, exploration, play, side quests, single player

blood: npcs, multi-player, teams, dating sims, social games

life: player stats, lives, hp, save files, inventory, rewards, ranked, resource management

doom: hazards, game over, balance and difficulty, challenge modes

mind: visuals, style, graphics, and audio

heart: roleplaying, dialogue options, choices matter, the emotional experience

hope: immersion, escapism, genre

rage: enemies, combat, realism

[astridsplace]

aspects as story elements

time: the plot, structure, pacing, editing

space: setting, worldbuilding

light: exposition, character relevance, information onscreen, canon, answers

void: ambivalance to the plot, b-plots, side tangents, breaking of story convention, what’s off screen, subtext, mystery, questions

breath: character freedom and agency, exploration and fun and journey, the middle of the story, the hero, the protagonist

blood: character relationships and obligations, secondary characters

life: character goals and backstory, starting circumstances, beginnings

doom: character obstacles and arc endings, resolution

mind: character choice, options, pov, demeanours, internal monologue, style and presentation, acting in a wide range

heart: character identity, internal conflict, nature, truth, dialogue, acting authentically and consistently, motivation, what’s underneath

hope: character beliefs, tone and theme of the story, genre, comedy, fantastical

rage: rising action, conflict, climax, drama, real world parallels

[astridsplace]

one sec, reading the bi masterdoc is blowing my mind… I thought I knew things, but comphet is a real fucker…

I’m attracted to people but disregard it completely if they’re not guys or don’t fit some narrow idealised type? how long will I throw away opportunities for companionship because of propaganda and fantasy and societal conditioning?

[astridsplace]

why does society fetishise youth when experience, that only comes with age, is so much cooler? I’m learning to love growing older and smarter and wiser

beauty fades, wisdom is forever

[astridsplace]

“The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making you think he was the good guy”

leaving this here cause it’s such an interesting prompt. so true to life, and also connects to some god characters of mine!!

[astridsplace]

unrelated note, drag queens’ working conditions and pay are fucking horrendous.

a lot of our entertainers… they need a fucking union

[astridsplace]

it really seems like we’re very fucked as a society… like technology, social media and screens are cutting off our connections and ruining our brains, our health, our lives… it really is that serious

this phone I’m typing on is a psychological weapon designed by the ruling class to divide and conquer us!! it’s working!

I’m typing this here, to no-one, instead of actually talking to a person about it (at least for now)

we need face to face, real world interaction and community now more than ever, it’s the only way to survive this

put your phone in a drawer, turn off your computer, and do something in person!!