Placements that indicate that you don’t connect easily with others
In this post I wanted to encompass things that are related to each other, being the feeling of not connecting with other people or feeling that it is difficult to find your place with a group of people. [In case you have any suggestion for this series, let me know when I open the ask box]. With that being said, let’s get started.
🟫Something that is essential in this kind of themes is our emotional world, being a great representation of this, the Moon. It plays a very important role since it tells us about the way we feel and the ease or difficulty with which we form bonds with people, and even if it is easy for us to feel comfortable or not.
🟤Moon in Capricorn. They may have difficulty trusting others easily, this is possibly because in their childhood the people who "cared for" them did anything but that, or put burdens on their shoulders about issues that did not correspond to them. These natives from a young age had to depend only on themselves, they grew up with the idea that they could not rely on another person, so they never felt the confidence to go tell their problems to others. They have this difficulty bonding with others since they are somewhat distrustful and take their emotions very seriously. People in their early environment may have downplayed their needs or not taken the native's vulnerability seriously [others may even have made them feel bad about being vulnerable and forced them to "not be weak"]. They analyze deeply the people that want to connect with them, and find it hard to open up.
🟤Moon in Aquarius. They are one of the most mentioned placements in this matter. These natives have difficulty feeling really accepted or part of a group, due to their childhood experiences. It is very likely that people told them how strange they were, so from a young age they developed the idea of never showing themselves completely and being somewhat more reserved with some facets of their personality. Similarly, their parents may have been indifferent to the emotional needs of these natives, so showing that emotional and "needy" side with others is very difficult for them. Bonding with other people can be difficult because of the fear of not being taken seriously or that their needs or them will be ignored just as they felt as children.
🟤Moon in Pisces. These natives with a sympathetic nature, a nice and polite personality and the ability to understand others perfectly without putting much effort into it, feel that it is very difficult for them to fit in with people or simply form a strong and stable bond with people. They are used to the displays of affection that come and go, and although they may seem strange to them, deep down they want some sweetness and to find at least one person who accepts them and sacrifices as much for them as they would. Feeling that they really connect with people is complicated, because they can even see themselves as difficult to understand and it can be difficult for them to deliberately show that vulnerability and caring nature that was so irregular in their lives.
🟤Moon in the 8th house. For these natives the word home, community or simply something that is supposed to be a group to trust, does not exist. These natives may have had to deal with a tense family environment, a difficult relationship with their mother, or turbulent emotional relationships. They may have had difficulty feeling safe from an early age, and as children the idea of relying their emotions, problems or emotional heaviness on others without feeling judged or in the sight of others may have been complicated. They are very selective with whom they allow to be very close to them and in a certain part they may fear being very transparent with other people. It is worth mentioning that they are people who take their bonds very seriously and seek to have the same level of commitment.
🟤Moon in the 12th house. These people may have a hard time showing their emotions or talking openly about what they need. They have a hard time trusting the idea of putting their hearts in the hands of other people and the idea of becoming very close to people can cause a bit of nerves in them. Insecurity lies in the fear of giving more than you receive, of being judged behind your back or that people do not take your emotions seriously. They may feel that they are very intense emotional people and that it is difficult for them to find people who are as intense or at least as committed to them. They may have experienced betrayals from people they considered close or very special to them. Deep down they seek a sense of stability, which is why they tend to prefer quality over quantity in friends. They do not consider many as friends, only a few, and it is precisely because of everything previously mentioned.
-For the following, we will consider as “tense aspects” conjunctions, oppositions, squares and quincunx-.
🟤Moon-Saturn tense aspects. They have an internal blockage that does not allow them to show their sensitive side so easily, they do not touch the cold or cruel side, but guided by the fear of being very vulnerable or being exposed with other people, they take their distance. They may have difficulty connecting in a stable way with the mother, a relationship that by the way can have many ups and downs and that the native can feel as cold or inexpressive. Due to this emotional distance from the mother or female figures in general, the native develops an independent personality as well as being cautious and reserved. They have a hard time reaching a high level of trust with others.
🟤Moon-Uranus tense aspects. The emotional needs of these natives were not regularly or even fully met. This forces them to have to deal with their own emotional world on their own from a very young age. The idea that someone ignores their needs or is not consistent with their actions can make natives nervous, who often choose to be on their own for fear of attracting people indifferent to what they need and want to be happy. With these aspects there is more of a fear of falling back into a pattern, so they have this tendency to overthink the relationships they are starting to form.
🟤Moon-Pluto tense aspects. The desire for intimacy, for depth in a relationship, to die for someone and have someone die for you collides with the fear that your vulnerabilities and feelings will be used against you. They do not easily trust other people's intentions, and despite appearing pleasant or polite with others, they hardly form bonds easily. "They are just acquaintances, nothing more," they say to themselves. They don't allow themselves to reveal much of themselves for fear of being too vulnerable, being seen as weak, or being mocked by others. They keep their distance and have a hard time opening up.
🟫Aquarius and the 11th house are the most mentioned when we talk about this, in this case, the position of Aquarius in the chart or the sign placed in the 11th house can indicate the reasons why it can be difficult for us to feel that we do not fit in with others.
🟤Stellium in the 11th house. People see these natives as very sociable or popular, and there is something very charismatic and resplendent in their personality and that friendly way of treating people, however, these natives naturally have this feeling of not having anyone to connect with. to 100%. They can get along with many people, but they may have a hard time really calling someone their friend. I have noticed that this is because they do not talk about their problems openly, they always deal with their issues on their own.
🟤Saturn in the 11th house. [In general this may apply to all the air houses, that is, 3rd, 7th and of course, 11th]. These natives often feel like an outsider, they can feel alone even if they are accompanied, they usually prefer to be on their own or be imposed to be, however they do not trust easily and have a good eye to see the true intentions of other people [this can vary if Neptune is in the 1st or 7th house axis]. It is difficult for them to appear authentic and transparent with everyone, they know perfectly well that there are people with whom it is not worth appearing that way. They are very selective about who they associate with and tend to take a good look before committing in any way.
🟤Lilith in the 11th house/Aquarius/11° or 23°. These people may have felt rejection from other people from a very young age, especially in school or crowded social settings. The idea of having to go through that again is painful for them with good reason. Many times they prefer not to expect anything from anyone to avoid disappointment. They do not seek to fit in when they are grown up, they do not seek to be a part, they do not seek any of that and they only seek to shine for their authenticity and in what they like the most. They have trouble feeling like they fit in or connect with other people, they may think that others connect more easily than they do. Despite this and being very observant, you’ll never see them isolating, denigrating or excluding someone, since they know what it feels like.
🟤Scorpio in the 11th house. These natives are very selective with the people they hang out with, as well as intuitive. The intuition they possess to detect people's true intentions was created due to negative experiences from the past. Here we can see people who could have been betrayed, defamed, harassed, criticized, gaslighted by some whom they considered friends, these betrayals of course left a mark, and a very deep one. It is difficult for them to form friendships, since they take it very seriously and are not willing to go through the same thing again.
🟤Aquarius in the 11th house. There is a certain duality with this overlay, since just as it can cause the natives to have difficulty belonging to a group, it also makes it easy for them to surprise and be admired by many people. Taking the first case, we can see that these natives tend to feel invisible at times, misunderstood or judged by people in their social environment, they feel the heaviness of looks. Here we meet people who, after all that they have experienced, were able to find refuge in being on their own. They stand out for being authentic, and that is something that you can easily see whether or not you are in their close group, but something that not many get to see is the genuineness of their emotions and the beauty of it, this because that same beauty has already been prey to the judging looks of other people.
🟤Capricorn in the 11th house. Having them in your life would be a great pleasure, this is due to the quality of their friendship and commitment to those they love, however, these natives can be involved in situations where those who called themselves their friends took advantage of them and of that desire that the natives had to help them with their problems. People can be freeloaders and opportunists, and this is something they know well. People they hang out with may have put a lot of burdens on them, or made them feel unimportant, even just talking to them when they needed something from them. But not anymore. Realizing this, these natives no longer let people into their hearts so easily.
🟤Ruler of the 11th house in the 12th house or vice versa. They are the feeling of disappearing into a crowd, a gradually disappearing voice, and that feeling of always being behind the scenes. Feeling forgotten, distanced. Feeling that they do a lot for others and they either do not notice it, or do not value it. These natives give absolutely everything in their friendships, but their mission is to focus on not giving more than they receive. In not talking to the wall and waiting for it to reply. Value yourself so as not to continue trying to connect with people who are not worth it.
🟤Sun or Rising in Aquarius. Their unique and fascinating personality is something that other people are not ready to see yet. With these natives we can see that they rarely feel understood, loved or even feel that someone pays attention to them. Everything can come as a result of differences with one of the parents or even problems relating to others. Despite their ambivert personality and fresh and friendly way with which they approach others, it is very difficult to feel that feeling of familiarity or friendship with anyone, they have standards and not only at an autonomous or romantic level.
🟤Mercury in Aquarius. These natives may feel that they are very different from some members of their family, especially siblings or cousins, and may have difficulty connecting with them. The same can happen to a large part of their schoolmates. Many times they may feel that they do not fit in with others because of their way of thinking, and they could even feel judged for it. Sometimes they keep their ideas or thoughts to themselves because they feel that the rest see them badly or do not understand them.
🟤Aquarius falling in 3rd or 7th house. This falling in the rest of air houses sign causes the feeling of not fitting in easily with people, especially those with whom one is supposed to be close. This is because the air houses are closely related to the connections we have with other people, our social life in general, and the presence of Aquarius here makes the native feel that they do not fit in, that they are very different from the rest of the people. and that people are constantly targeting them and perceiving them as very rare. They find it difficult to connect deeply with people because they have ideals, hobbies or traits that make them different, being very prone to attracting people who are somewhat intolerant of them.
🟫The hidden importance of the 2nd, 4th and 8th house. Sometimes we seem so focused on sticking to what is most talked about, so much so that we forget to think beyond that and analyze what has a more exact correlation. The 2nd-8th axis tells us about intimacy, with the 2nd house being physical, material or tangible intimacy and the 8th house being emotional, complex and deep. Similarly, the 4th house also speaks to us about needs and the basis of our emotions, the physical and emotional closeness that we can have with people.
🟤Saturn in the 2nd house. The fear of these natives is the idea of generating some kind of dependency towards another person, expecting a lot from them and that they betray them or be negligent/indifferent towards them. They take all kinds of relationships, friendships, romances very seriously, and demand a level of loyalty for it to be sustained, since they are willing to do that and more. Feeling truly close to another person can be a difficult ride, and they always prefer to take their time to connect with others. They are upset and scared by the idea that what they want and need is ignored by people who are supposed to be special to them, since it makes them feel little valued.
🟤Saturn in the 4th house. They fear emotional vulnerability with other people, they are usually the classics in whom others confide their heaviness, but they hardly feel that they can or should do it with other people. Along with feeling that it is not easy to connect with others, they can often feel that they do not fit in with other people, especially in childhood or youth, when their level of maturity may be higher than that of people their age. Many times they are not interested in things or activities that people their age are, so they unconsciously or consciously isolate themselves from people their age. Family life is also somewhat tense and they feel that they cannot rely on their parents, and having this difficulty bonding with people who are supposed to be close, they think it is just as difficult with strangers.
🟤Saturn in the 8th house. The difficulty of these natives lies in becoming very close to another person on an emotional level, and it is not that they cannot or there is a fear of commitment, they fear betrayal of any kind. They know everything they are capable of doing to make the relationship last, they know everything they are willing to sacrifice, but many times they doubt that other people will commit to the same level. They fear losing control of themselves, losing themselves in another person until they forget about them, so they seek to form bonds with people who give everything they receive in return. Precisely for this reason they feel that they do not connect with anyone.
🟤Stellium in the 2nd house. The 2nd house is reduced to being only the one that talks about money and possessions, but the reality is that it mentions things like our comfort zone, and the feeling of value in us. Remembering that the Stellium represents something we seek, and this house represents something "ours", lasting bonds and even along with the 4th house, it show levels of closeness, with this overlay we can find people who seek to have closeness and a significant bond with others, but they think that they will have them more difficult than others. There is in these natives a fear of never finding their place, of not feeling that they belong, of not finding trustworthy people.
🟤Aquarius in the 2nd house. With this placement we can find natives whose facade can be perceived as distant, they do not usually see themselves as touchy people as soon as you meet them and they seem to be from a very small social circle. They don't usually like places with a lot of noise or people, and meeting new people may be something they either don't like or are rarely interested in [unless Venus or Jupiter is placed over there]. They hardly trust the intentions of other people. In addition to this, these natives may have grown up in an unstable environment, a place in which the displays of affection or security that parents provided was not something so stable or secure.
🟤Aquarius in the 4th house. This overlay causes people not to connect easily with their family, either because they are very different, because the native sees some of its members as distant and cold, or simply because their relationship was always somewhat tense from the beginning. There is something in them that makes them repress themselves emotionally in a certain way, deep down they crave for a connection that makes them forget about that childhood in which they did not get along with one of the parents [in many cases it could be the mother], they seek form connections with other people, but are afraid of too much emotional intensity or too much instability and mixed signals. Despite this pleasant desire, they have difficulty opening up to others and find it very difficult to find someone with whom they feel they can be totally themselves, with whom they can share and open their hearts.
🟤Ruler of the 2nd or 4th house in the 12th house. Something very curious happens with these natives, and this is that despite desiring an almost magical type of connection, a soul-to-soul bond, in which the other person understands them and accepts them and loves them as much as they would, they have an enormous fear of being too vulnerable. It is very likely that the people with whom they were close or should have been close according to the standards of society (family) showed them irregularities, inconsistency and little support, so they may fear repeating that pattern. They are very likely to mistrust one or both of their parents.
🟤Ruler of the 8th in the 7th house. What happens with these natives is a little more complex and difficult to talk about, since their learning in this life is to be more selective with the people with whom they open up. It is very likely that they trusted people they shouldn't, people who called themselves friends but deep down drained their energy and wanted to have their sparks and glow, envious people and even a toxic person. These natives can be very intuitive and observant based on what they went through. They take a lot of time to open up to someone and feel like they can finally trust someone again.
🟤Ruler of the 1st in the 8th house/12th house or vice versa. In these natives I have noticed something and it is that they give the impression of being very mysterious and this has a reason. They don't like the idea that someone knows too much about them, at least not at the beginning, and not to be perceived as more interesting, rather because they know perfectly well that they cannot trust their most authentic and sensitive side to others. It is very likely that not only have they experienced betrayal, but they have also seen it from a very young age in their early environment. Being very observant they take those experiences and decide not to go through them.
