Classic Heterosexual Woman

Becca - Minor - 24/12 - Full of gay pining Icon by Prideiicons

[z-nogyrop]

those “monkey brain/human brain” posts except the monkey brain is presented as the rational one

[z-nogyrop]

monkey brain: extra body hair provides warmth and producing it but then cutting it off wastes valuable nutrients

human brain: hehe leg smooth

[localdoubt-deactivated20221128]

*looking at a tiger*

monkey brain: that animal right there is a dangerous predator adapted for stalking, chasing, and quickly dispatching of creatures like us. we should find high ground to get away from it before it sees us

human brain: hehe kitty wana pet

[localdoubt-deactivated20221128]

monkey brain: the ocean is the last place we want to be right now. we’re not built to swim and we’ll likely drown within five minutes. and let’s not even get into what might want to kill us once we get into open water

human brain: wheee swimmy

[eu-know-how-itis]

it got better

[books-in-order]

[oldmagick]

move. she has places to be

[knifebucket]

Fashion

[gaypasta]

I bwess the wains dwown in afwica

[screamy-pinecone-deactivated201]

And fuck this person in particular

[gaypasta]

I know im op but big mood

[sa2ha]

americans are asleep post slavic cats

[sa2ha]

[unpopular]

[angelhurt]

Not to be like…controversial or anything but like….jealousy…turning saints into the sea….swimming through sick lullabies…choking on your alibis…

[markv5]

История об уменьшении кружки…

[eyes-from-the-past]

“The story about the shrinking cup”

[proxypunch]

THANK YOU FOR A WONDERFUL TRANSLATION

[teshima--junta-deactivated20161]

HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS IN 3 EASY STEPS

STEP 1: purposefully bump into girl(make sure you are typing into your calculator while doing this)

STEP 2: say “im sorry. i didnt you, i was taking inventory of all my lizards”

STEP 3: make sure she sees the number 42069666 on the screen

[teathattast]

[rnelodyy]

i hate this op

[annadesu]

This post gave me an aneurysm

[dillondean]

[lesbianghostposting]

[athenasgirlfriend]

//

[phsfg]

The weirdest thing I’ve learned while working for pest control is that snails love rat poison and will actively eat it but hate seseme seeds

[phsfg]

I should add that rat poison has NO effect on snails, and they just get super fat cause they gourge themselves in boxes of rat poison

[hexpress]

absolute units

[mx-fawkes]

Roadhog: I’m a bear trying to figure out if my twink friend likes me. He likes hugging me and kissing my stomach tattoo a lot, and sleeps in my bed sometimes, but maybe he’s just tactile because he grew up with little physical contact?

He’s told me multiple times that he thinks I’m the sexiest slab of pork alive but I think he’s joking… Help?

Everyone on future Yahoo answers: Jesus Christ Dude.

[heir-to-the-diamond-throne]

Me: *falling asleep to an audiobook on the science of the gut*

Book: saliva is actually filtered blood!

Me: ʕʘ‿ʘʔ

[heir-to-the-diamond-throne]

Me: ʕʘ‿ʘʔ

Book: saliva also contains a painkiller that is stronger than morphine, but we don’t produce a lot of it otherwise we’d be constantly high

Me: ʕʘ Д ʘʔ

[heir-to-the-diamond-throne]

Opiorphin is 6x stronger than morphine and actually contains an anti-depressant compound which is why some doctors believe it’s linked to comfort eating

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/20610867/

[gogetdressed]

Esther Quek; Queen of Menswear

I’ve always been a fan of a good suit on a lady. Post Bianca, no one seems to master a suit better than Esther Quek. Fashion director of The Rake, Revolution and La Femme (via her Twitter bio). Esther has been a street shutterbug favorite for some time. Her quirky yet stylish suit combinations and feminine accessories has made her one of my favorite style stars.

The girls want to be her, the boys want to be her.

[tenderlesbian-deactivated201807]

futch now officially means “funky butch”. thanks for coming to my ted talk

i approve