[athisagony]

[movedhisagony-deactivated202204]

hisagony​:

                            everybody    ,    listen    up.    i    know    you’re    afraid    ,    but           𝙷𝙾𝚆    𝚈𝙾𝚄    𝙲𝙷𝙾𝙾𝚂𝙴    𝚃𝙾    𝙷𝙰𝙽𝙳𝙻𝙴    𝚃𝙷𝙰𝚃    𝙵𝙴𝙰𝚁    𝙸𝚂    𝚄𝙿    𝚃𝙾    𝚈𝙾𝚄.           you    can    LET    IT    BREAK    YOU    DOWN    or    you    can    use    it    to           𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖊    𝖞𝖔𝖚    𝖘𝖙𝖗𝖔𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖗.           are    we    just    a    bunch    of    kids    from    the    ark    who    weren’t           𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆    𝐄𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇    𝐓𝐎    𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐕𝐄      ?           because    if    we    lose    today    ,    IF    WE    LET    THE    FEAR    WIN    ,    that    is    what    they’ll    say    about    us.    but           𝙸    𝚂𝙰𝚈    𝚂𝙲𝚁𝙴𝚆    𝙵𝙴𝙰𝚁      :           𝐈'𝐌    𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆    𝐌𝐘    𝐎𝐖𝐍    𝐃𝐀𝐌𝐍    𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘   !                            CANON      DIVERGENT      BELLAMY      BLAKE      FROM      THE      HUNDRED      TORTURED      BY      KARI.        ©

[athisagony]

azgedaspy:

the smart thing is to leave before she can get swept away.      she knows she has to go…      but what is smart is not always right.      certain decisions lie outside of logic ;    some require   ‘ unnecessary ’  risk.      he licks his lips as he stares at hers…      he wants to kiss her.      his kind eyes darken as they scramble over her body and leave      scarlet patterns      in their wake.      why is she not walking away ?      why is she not gone ?      instead she is letting him get closer and closer until it is impossible to separate    want    from    need.            “      i have to be back in azgeda tomorrow.      ”            a weak protest at best ;    is she even protesting ?      her fingers itch to reach out for him,      lifting off of the thin fabric of her leggings in anticipation            (      but she keeps them down; she cannot believe she is being this reckless again.      )            she does not take a step forward, but she does lean in      – -      seeking his touch against her mind’s will.            “      this is not smart …      ”            but is it    wrong ?

                DESIRE    BLOOMS    IN    HIS    CHEST.                 it's    fiery    -    hot    like    radiant    sun.    it's    vigorous    -    demand    upon    limbs    impotent.            she's    irresistible.            SHE'S    LIKE    METAL.    HE    ,    MAGNET.    SHE'S    LIKE    A    FOOD    SOURCE.    HE    ,    RAVENOUS    LION.    there's    no    denying    the    yearn.    there's    no    denying    the    passion    still    blossoming    within    the    hollow    of    his    body.                 hollow    no    more    when    love    prospers.                 the    closer    he    gets    ,    the    more    she    lingers.    he    doesn't    step    closer    ,    but    she    doesn't    move    away.            is    this    her    best    argument      ?                 ❝                 tomorrow    ,                 ❞                 he    repeats    the    only    word    with    relevance    ,                 ❝                 𝐁𝐔𝐓    𝐍𝐎𝐓    𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓.                 ❞                 what's    that    sprouting    upon    lips      ?      A    GRIN.    A    SINFUL    SMIRK.    he's    diminishing    space    between    them    ,    closing    in    on    her    until    the    backs    of    her    shins    collide    with    the    cot.    his    lips    hover    hers.    hands    dare    to    touch    her    hips    ,                 ❝                 tell    me    you    don't    want    me      &      i'll    stop.    i'll    let    you    go.                 ❞                 𝙽𝙾    ,    𝙷𝙴    𝚆𝙾𝙽'𝚃.    𝚃𝙾𝙽𝙸𝙶𝙷𝚃    𝙸𝚂    𝙾𝚄𝚁𝚂.

[athisagony]

the way i Screamed when i saw your writing on my dash. aHH i've missed it and yOU !!

WHY ARE YOU SO DFGFDFG CUTE. WHY. HOW. sun, i missed you.

[athisagony]

ur hot ;)

CORRECTION: YOU are hot. the hottest. 🔥

[athisagony]

glad to see you writing again, loser. <3

these replies are 10/10 from like 5 months ago. i just never posted them.... but..... i hate you. :)

[athisagony]

headsaves:

“   oh   my   god   …   what   happened   to   you?   ”

                GRIME    TARNISHES    HIS    CLOTHING.                 mud    clings    to    flesh    as    keys    are    discarded    from    grasp    unstable.                 ❝                 𝐑𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑    𝐆𝐎𝐓    𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐂𝐊    𝐈𝐍    𝐓𝐇𝐄    𝐌𝐔𝐃.                 ❞                 bellamy    clarifies    ,    peeling    off    his    skaikru    jacket    &    tossing    it    aside.                 he's    unamused.    soaked.    dirty.                 ❝                 had    to    push    it    out    with    jasper    while    raven    steered    -    DIDN'T    GO    SO    WELL.                 ❞

[athisagony]

theirwar·:

people look at bellamy like he’s their leader,  like  he  was  meant  for  it.  but  peyton  has  felt  the  truth.  she  has  laid  at  his  feet,  bloody  and  afraid  by  what  she’s  witnessed;  reprimanded  for  daring  to  go  against  the  current  of  violence  he  stirs.  he  was  not  a  god  and  neither  was  clarke,  yet  both  somehow  seemed  to  believe  maybe  they  were.  the  tears  burn,  vision  blurring  as  she  feels  someone  help  her  away  from  the  scene  of  murphy  being  raised  into  the  air.  cries  erupt  and  not  for  the  pain,  or  for  the  searing  tear  that  continues  to  bleed  from  her  arm.  

what  they  were  doing  wasn’t  right.  shouldn’t  the  goal  of  landing  on  earth  again  be  to  make  things  better  than  they  were  before?  what  was  the  point  in  living  if  you  didn’t  learn  from  the  foolish  mistakes  of  those  who  came  before  you?

in  the  days  that  follow  peyton  keeps  her  distance,  rage  continuing  to  simmer  as  they  learn  the  truth:  charlotte  was  the  killer.  not  murphy.  he  was  banished  because  of  a  choice  the  young  girl  made.  it  causes  her  to  lash  out,  to  seek  refuge  in  the  physicality  of  how  they  must  all  live.  when  bellamy  eventually  arrives  with  apologetic  eyes,  the  venom  sinks  itself  into  him.    “    what  do  you  want  to  do  now?  change  my  bandage?  will  that  make  you  feel  better?    ”   

                BELLAMY    ,    PLEASE.    I    DIDN'T    DO    THIS.                 oh    ,    it    haunts.    is    that    what    it    is    ?    vocals    brimming    with    imploring    terror.    NOOSE    TIGHT.    TIGHT.    TIGHT.    around    a    neck    innocent.                 𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙻𝙰𝙼𝚈.    𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙻𝙰𝙼𝚈.    𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙻𝙰𝙼𝚈.                 the    chants    are    thundering    in    volume.    louder    than    boy    -    innocent's    pleas.    HE    WAS    GIVING    THE    PEOPLE    WHAT    THEY    WANTED.    he    was    giving    the    people    what    they    deserved.    he    was    punishing    the    guilty.                 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘    𝐇𝐄    𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍'𝐓    𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐋𝐓𝐘.                 no    ,    this    is    clarks's    fault. 𝙼𝚄𝚁𝙿𝙷𝚈    𝙳𝙸𝙳𝙽'𝚃    𝙺𝙸𝙻𝙻    𝚆𝙴𝙻𝙻𝚂.    𝙸    𝙳𝙸𝙳. weaponized    hands    draw    back    the    fabric    of    the    tent.    remorseful    gaze    finds    her    ,    crimson    already    beginning    to    seep    through    the    bandages    that    conceal    her    arm.                 ❝                 THERE'S    NO    TIME    FOR    THAT    ,                 ❞                 he    admits    ,    there's    no    time    to    apologize.                         𝐁𝐔𝐓    𝐈𝐓    𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍'𝐓    𝐌𝐘    𝐅𝐀𝐔𝐋𝐓.                 ❝                 look                 ,    murphy's    targeting    charlotte.                 she's    just    a    kid    ,    peyton.                    ❞                 he    searches    her    features    for    that    same    remorse.    that    sympathy.                 ❝                 I    KNOW    YOU    DIDN'T    WANT    ANYONE    TO    GET    HURT    ,    so    help    me    find    her.                 help    me    keep    her    safe.                 ❞                 from    a    wrath    too    strong.    from    a    killer    in    the    making.                 𝙱𝚄𝚃    𝙸𝚃'𝚂    𝙽𝙾𝚃    𝙼𝚈    𝙵𝙰𝚄𝙻𝚃.    𝙸𝚃'𝚂    𝙽𝙾𝚃    𝙼𝚈    𝙵𝙰𝚄𝙻𝚃.

[athisagony]

orionblood·:

Groggy  eyes  slowly  open  to  take  in  his  surroundings.   There is an immediate sense of failure that creeps into his chest. How stupid could he be, getting caught. In those moments between full realisation and the involuntary sleep, he remembers a face. A girl. Pretty smile and eyes as green as the trees. How incredibly, intensively, unbelievably stupid could he be! Allowing himself to be enticed, to let his guard down, all for a pretty face. However, not the first time it has gotten him in trouble. The trouble has just never been this deep. Arms tied behind his back, his hands twist and scramble at the course feeling of rope against his skin. The tiredness has all but gone now, as the panic begins to set in. He has to get out of this alive, or he is never going to hear the end of it.  Ben grunts, looks around the dimly lit room. After a moment of adjusting to the light, his eyes make out the shape of a man across the room. A few moments longer, and it is unmistakable. The clothes. Skaikru. It takes all his energy not to roll his eyes.

        “Hei. Yu.”      His restraints keep him from moving too far across the room, but enough to be able to reach his foot out. Kick at the unconscious man with toe of his foot.    “Laik yu stedaunon?”

                SKULL    BURNS.    BURNS.    BURNS.                 like    embers    licking    at    firewood.    like    flames    melting    flesh.    what    version    will    be    spun    today    ?                 the   leader.    the   hero.    the   martyr.    the   murderer.                 he's    nothing    if    not    massacre'd.    if    not    tainted    in    crimson.    oh    ,    blood    fresh.                 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐃    𝐎𝐅    𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐄𝐒    𝐍𝐎𝐓    𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐄𝐃. is    that    english    ?                 no.    it's    gibberish.                 a    groan    escapes    arid    lips    ,    optics    struggling    to    focus    on    male    occupying    space    across    from    him.    his    vision    is    blurred    from    the    blow    to    his    head.                 he    remembers    hunting    a    grounder.       (      GOT MY GUN.    𝙻𝙴𝙰𝙳    𝙼𝙴    𝚃𝙾    𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁    𝙿𝙴𝙾𝙿𝙻𝙴.    𝙼𝚈    𝙵𝙸𝙽𝙶𝙴𝚁    𝙸𝚂    𝙹𝚄𝚂𝚃    𝙸𝚃𝙲𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙶    𝚃𝙾    𝙿𝚄𝙻𝙻    𝚃𝙷𝙴    𝚃𝚁𝙸𝙶𝙶𝙴𝚁.      )       A    THUD.    A    BANG.    DISCOMFORT.         now    he's    here.                 ❝                 i    don't    speak    grounder   ,    idiot.                 ❞                 he    hisses    at    the    stranger    ,    ignoring    him.         where    the    fuck    is    he    ?      arms    are    bound    ,    but    he    struggles    against    them.                 𝐇𝐄    𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐒    𝐓𝐎    𝐆𝐄𝐓    𝐎𝐔𝐓    𝐎𝐅    𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄.                 he    needs    to    get    back    to    camp    ,    potentially    warn    the    others.    if    he    can    manage    to    get    free    he    can    kill    this    unwanted    guest      &      then    go    for    the    others      .    .    .    .      but    his    gun.    gone.    of    course    they    de-weaponized    him. BUT    HIS    HANDS    WORK    JUST    AS    GOOD.        TRAINED    -    KILLER.

[athisagony]

skysplita:

Fingers flexing tensely against her armor-clad forearms, a shield from the bunker’s fetid, stale cold designed to keep more in than out, Octavia offered no sign of remorse for her assessment — no amendment to her proclamation that those who’d once been her allies ( her friends, like Raven, Harper, Monty, everyone who’d banded together before everything had quite literally gone up in flames ) had long since faded out of her decaying sphere of desperate, dismal existence.

“ I know who she is, ”  she returned, the betrayal in her voice never relenting, never receding.  Though time had changed almost everything, morphed every iota of hope she’d once had that the last of humanity would come together to overcome everything into suffocating darkness, the wrongs of the past could never be erased, nor could she forgive Echo’s sins — not when Wonkru’s survival depended on absolute loyalty.

Bellamy had to know that.

In the dead, lifeless black of her eyes, offset by the flicker of the bunker lights up ahead, something like hurt seemed to stir.  Resentment.  Accusation.  “ She’s an enemy of Wonkru, ” she pressed, the brazen, even goading trajectory of the scuff of her boot on the dusty war room floor putting her a single step closer to her brother.  ” She murdered Skaikru at Mount Weather. ”  Another step, drawing her out from her desk.  “ Gina.  Ilian on that damn battlefield.  She would have killed me.  You’re defending a killer, Bellamy.  That makes you a traitor too.  ”

                THERE    IT    GOES.    SNAP.    SNAP.    SNAP                 goes    the    tether    that    once    connected    him    to    his    sister.                 protecther.keephersafe.                 but    who    is    she    now    ?      A    STRANGER.    TOO    BATTLE    -    WORN.    TOO    CONSUMED    BY    BETRAYAL.            he    feels    as    if    he's    bleeding    inwardly.                 𝙱𝙻𝙾𝙾𝙳    -    𝙵𝙰𝙼𝙸𝙻𝚈    𝚂𝙻𝙸𝙿𝙿𝙸𝙽𝙶    𝚃𝙷𝚁𝙾𝚄𝙶𝙷    𝚃𝙷𝙴    𝙲𝚁𝙰𝙲𝙺𝚂    𝙾𝙵    𝙷𝙸𝚂    𝙵𝙸𝙽𝙶𝙴𝚁𝚂    𝙻𝙸𝙺𝙴    𝙰𝚂𝙷𝙴𝚂.                 ❝                 you    know    who    she    was    ,                 ❞                 he    corrects    ,    daring    to    take    a    step    forward    ,    to    confront    her.                 ❝                 she    was    an    azgeda    spy.    she    was    a    traitor.    but    that's    not    who    she    is    anymore.                 ❞                 but    eyes    so    dark.    so    cold.    so    hollow.    they    stare    back    at    him.    they    peer    through    his    soul.    she's    not    hearing    him.    no    ,    she    doesn't    want    to    hear    him. a    sigh    escapes    arid    lips.    she    rattles    off    a    lucid    list    of    sins      :      murder.    murder.    murder.                 ❝                 WE    ALL    LIVE    WITH    REGRETS    ,    O.                 ❞                 he    would    know.    he    lives    with    more    than    any    human    living      &      breathing.    so    many    have    died    by    his    own    hand    ,    yet    she    forgives    him.                 𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑.                 ❝                 give    me    a    break    ,                 ❞                 voice    is    an    angry    rasp    ,    eyes    rolling    at    the    accusation    ,                 ❝                 you    know    i'm    on    your    side.    ,                                 𝙸'𝙼    𝙰𝙻𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚂    𝙾𝙽    𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁    𝚂𝙸𝙳𝙴.    ,                 ❞                 all    of    their    lives.    a    team.    a    team.    but    are    they    still    ?                 ❝                 I'M    NOT    YOUR    ENEMY.    AND    NEITHER    IS    ECHO.                 ❞

[athisagony]

me: watching hockey and wanting to be active here again. 👀

also me: but what if i just move bellamy to a nice new blog......

[athisagony]

damnbrain:

whatever   they   do,   they   need   to   do   it   fast.    head   pushes   back  further   into   the   makeshift   pillow,    eyes   opening   lazily.    neither   of   them   know   how   to   perform   surgery   &   even   clarke   doesn’t   have   the   tools   right   here   to   do   it.

blood   loss   is   already   starting   to   affect   her   &   she’s   not   sure   how   long   she   can   last   like   this.     not   when   she’s   so   damn   tired.     “    we   worry   about   one   thing   at   a   time.    ”     voice   breathless,   fingers   around   his   wrist   squeezing   and   releasing   to   keep   herself   focused.    not   that   her   grip   can   be   very   tight   right   now.

“     stop   the   bleeding,   so   i   can   think.    stop   the   attack   &   then   worry   about   the   bullet.     ”      they   can’t   afford   to   waste   time   on   an   unprepared   surgery.    not   with   the   time   murphy   wasted.     “    we   keep   me   laying   down,   i   walk   you   and   jasper   through   what   needs   to   be   done   using   walkies…   &   hope   that   the   bullet   doesn’t   move.   ”    it’s   the   only   thing   they   can   do   with   those   circumstances  &   so   far   adrenaline   is   still   keeping   her  awake.

but   none   of   that   can   happen   with   him   crumbling.   they   need   him   outside   like   they   need   her   skills.     “    hey   idiot,    this   isn’t   your   fault.    ”      still,    she   means   it.    raven   doesn’t   blame   him.

                IS    THERE    SALVATION    IN    A    WORLD    SO    TORTURED    ?                 in    a    world    filled    with    spears.    gunfire.    murder.    no.    DEATH    IS    INEVITABLE    IN    A    WORLD    SO    CRUEL    /    COLD.    her    digits    around    his    wrist    are    weak.    the    hold    is    so    weak.    it's    a    testimony    to    how    much    blood    she's    truly    lost.    to    how    close    to    death    she    is.                 teetering.    teetering.    teetering.                 she's    on    the    ledge    of    no    return. IS    THIS    YOUR    FAULT    ,    HERO    ?                 yes.yes.yes.                 i    should    be    laying    there    ,    not    raven. ❝                 one    thing    at    a    time.                 ❞                 he    repeats    her    words    ,    but    they're    so    low    in    volume.    they're    barely    audible.    he    hears    her    words    ,    but    they're    muffled.    almost    as    if    he's    hearing    them    while    submerged    in    water.    so    murky.    GOD    ,    THE    GUILT    IS    GNAWING    AT    HIS    INSIDES    LIKE    A    RAVENOUS    ANIMAL    SEEKING    A    FOOD    SOURCE. 𝙷𝙴𝚈    𝙸𝙳𝙸𝙾𝚃    ,    𝚃𝙷𝙸𝚂    𝙸𝚂𝙽'𝚃    𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁    𝙵𝙰𝚄𝙻𝚃.                 but    isn't    it    ?                 ❝                 YEAH    ,    WHATEVER.                 ❞                 he    rolls    his    shoulders    back    ,    pulling    himself    together.                 ❝                 you're    right    ,    we    need    to    focus.    stop    the    bleeding    ,    stop    the    grounder's    from    doing    any    further    damage.                 ❞                 𝐒𝐇𝐄    𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐘    𝐇𝐀𝐒    𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐋    𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆.                 she'll    probably    need    a    blood    transfusion    at    some    point.                 ❝                 i    don't    think    cauterizing    gunshot    wounds    is    effective    ,                 so    maybe      .    .    .      i    find    something    better    used    as    a    tourniquet      &      then    i    can    -    I'LL    BANDAGE    IT.                 ❞                 he    nods    as    if    this    plan    will    suffice. he    searches    for    the    first    aid    kit    ,                 ❝                 𝐈'𝐌    𝐍𝐎𝐓    𝐆𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐆    𝐓𝐎    𝐋𝐄𝐓    𝐘𝐎𝐔    𝐃𝐈𝐄    ,    𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍.                 ❞                 it's    a    promise.                 save her. save her. save her.

[athisagony]

roseguided:

        𝐋𝐈𝐋𝐘’𝐒 𝐉𝐎𝐁 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓 𝐎𝐂𝐓𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐀 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊𝐄𝐃 && 𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐌𝐘 𝐃𝐈𝐃 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐃𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐆.   she hoists the little girl , now ten years old , onto her back with hands cupped under her legs to keep her secure && from falling off.    ❝ now , we’ve gotta be a little quiet here o , but what do you say about a piggyback ride? ❞  asked lily in the hopes of getting the girls mind off of being stuck in their apartment the entire day.  when her suggestion is met with happy words of encouragement , lily smiles && bends her knees before taking off in the direction of the other side of the blake apartment.   (  every day she’s thankful for them trusting her as much as to let her know about octavia.  it wasn’t until she && bellamy became close that she’d gotten to know octavia who , at the time , was even younger than she is now!  it’d only dawned on her recently how long she’d known bellamy when she noticed how big octavia had gotten all of the   𝚂𝚄𝙳𝙳𝙴𝙽.    )     ;     ❝ better hold on! you can’t fall off or you’ll land in the lava! ❞  laughter follows , music to her hears.  after a couple run arounds , lily kneels to let the girl off her back.  octavia protests , but lily reasons :   ❝  you’re just too heavy for me , o.  lemme recharge my rocket battery && we can go again,  okay?  ❞  bright smile overtakes lips as lily sits across the dinner table from bellamy.  the sweater she wore is stripped off && laid over back of chair.   ❝ whatcha workin’ on , bell? anything interesting? ❞

                SAVIOR    OF    SISTER.    CARETAKER    OF    SISTER.                 is    that    what    he    is    ?      A    SOUL    SO    HEAVY.    SO    DIRTY.    SO    TAINTED.    he    can    barely    save    himself    ,                 𝙽𝙴𝚅𝙴𝚁    𝙼𝙸𝙽𝙳    𝙶𝙸𝚁𝙻    -    𝙸𝙽𝙽𝙾𝙲𝙴𝙽𝚃.       𝙽𝙴𝚅𝙴𝚁    𝙼𝙸𝙽𝙳    𝙶𝙸𝚁𝙻    -    𝙷𝙸𝙳𝙳𝙴𝙽.                 muscles    ache    under    the    strain    of    training    to    join    the    guard    in    a    year.    the    pressure    weighs    on    him    like    the    weight    of    the    world.    like    the    weight    of    the    entire    fucking    ark.                 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊    /    𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊    /    𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊.                 it    says    ,                 crumble.you'renotahero. jubilant    giggles    alleviate    air    so    tension    filled.                 𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙻𝙰𝙼𝚈'𝚂    𝙶𝚁𝙰𝚃𝙴𝙵𝚄𝙻    𝙵𝙾𝚁    𝙻𝙸𝙻𝚈.    ,                 despite    the    perpetual    apprehension    his    mother    has    in    her    loyalty.                 ACCUSATION:    SHE    COULD    SELL    OUT    YOUR    SISTER    ,    BELLAMY.          ANSWER:    SHE    WOULD    NEVER    USE    OCTAVIA    AS    A    BARGAINING    CHIP.                 she'd    never    put    her    in    danger.                    the    conversation    goes    the    same    way.    every    time. ❝                 𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍    𝐎𝐅    𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊    ,                 ❞                 he    clarifies    ,    gaze    shifting    from    the    papers    occupying    the    space    before    him.                 ❝                 don't    think    it    categorizes    as    interesting    ,                 ❞                 he    smiles    gently    ,    tapping    pencil    to    paper.                 ❝                 i    let    myself    get    pretty    behind    WITH    ALL    OF    THIS    GUARD    TRAINING.                 ❞                 family    depends    on    you.                 𝙳𝙾𝙽'𝚃    𝙻𝙴𝚃    𝚃𝙷𝙴𝙼    𝙳𝙾𝚆𝙽    ,    𝙱𝙾𝚈    -    𝙱𝚁𝙾𝙺𝙴𝙽.

[athisagony]

skysplita:

Wide-eyed glance bypassing Bellamy’s, the hulking mass of Lincoln’s body lying prone on the ground and the glint of spent bullet casings scattered by his feet, Octavia let out a sigh that seemed to shudder with the force of the nod she gave, and leaned into her brother’s side.  In one frenzied moment of inconceivable violence, their foray into the dark was over.  Two guardsmen were dead, torn limb from limb, their remains smeared across the garage floor like war paint, and Lincoln… Lincoln would more than certainly carry on his bloodthirsty rampage as soon as he regained consciousness.  

He’d kill again —– and the others, those of whom had evaded the attack on the dropship, wouldn’t hesitate to put a bullet in his brain.

Hesitantly, eyes momentarily finding her brother’s disconcerted gaze in the near darkness, Octavia lowered herself to one knee, the tips of her callused fingers scrabbling for purchase around the grip of her sword.  With the other hand, she tentatively reached in the vicinity of Lincoln’s ragged shirt collar, the furs and patchwork leather draped across him matted with the same gore that resided under his nails and foamed in the part of his lips.  One touch was all she’d needed to feel the erratic beat of his pulse.  All she’d needed to discern that Bellamy was right;  they needed to get him out, and now.

“ Bell, the dropship, ” she supplied, craning her neck to look back at her brother over her shoulder.  Though their former stronghold had seen better days, it’d held strong against the grounders before.  Keeping one reaper inside, and the others out —– it seemed like the only viable solution.  Like their only hope, when every iota of it had already come so close to running dry.  “ Nyko can help us. ” 

                FEAR    IS    WHAT    SUBDUES    HER.                 reticence.    her    gaze    lingers    on    a    fallen    lincoln    ,    blood    oozing    from    the    wound    in    his    leg.    bullet    embedded    in    flesh.                 𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙻𝙰𝙼𝚈    𝙼𝙾𝚅𝙴𝚂    𝚃𝙾    𝙲𝙾𝚁𝙿𝚂𝙴    -    𝚁𝙾𝚃𝚃𝙸𝙽𝙶    ,                 not    far    from    the    unconscious    reaper    ,    digits    tearing    at    the    fabric    of    the    shirt    that    dons    him.                 ❝                 WE    CAN    GET    PRESSURE    ON    THE    WOUND    ,                 ❞                 he    pulls    tattered    fabric    around    the    reaper's    leg    ,                 tying    tight    to    supply    the    necessary    pressure    to    keep    him    alive. THE    DROPSHIP.    NYKO. bellamy    hesitates    ,    they    should    bring    him    back    to    their    people.    he    still    has    his    qualms    about    the    grounder's    ,    his    evident    issues    of    trust.                 they've killed.    they've murdered.                 BUT    SO    HAVE    YOU    ,    SKAIBOY.                 ❝                 𝐎𝐊𝐀𝐘    ,    𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐇.                 ❞                 he's    agreeing    ,    beginning    to    lift    the    weight    of    lincoln's    body    off    of    the    concrete    ,    arm    draped    over    his    shoulder.                 ❝                 take    an    arm    ,                 ❞                 he    urges    ,    MOVING    DEAD    WEIGHT    ,    ESPECIALLY    WEIGHT    CONSUMED    OF    NOTHING    BUT    MUSCLE    IS    STRENUOUS.    the    added    assistance    will    make    a    difference       &       it'll    get    them    there    faster.

[athisagony]

shesdaylight·:

she isn’t sure what’s worse.        the faux silence of a dead body she must represent,  the fear of what could possibly happen to not only her but to bellamy if he’s made.    if he’s caught impersonating one of the mountain men.    she knows what will happen to her if that fear becomes a reality,   but she doesn’t want to imagine what they’ll do to him.     or,     the simple sound of the squeaky wheels of the cart as it moves further and further down the hallway.     underneath the blanket she feels as though she’s already dead  -  her silence just further proving the point.    

it’s hard,   to keep so quiet.    to keep her breaths from making noise,  to let out little squeaks and sounds as her nerves begin to rise the longer she lays upon the cart.     it’s hard to keep her breaths soft enough so that the blanket on her doesn’t rise and fall with each breath;   she resorts to holding it for as long as she can and as quiet as she can, slowly releases her breaths.    and repeats.    a never ending loop of playing dead.            if it weren’t for bellamy,   she would be.    

rapunzel hears the footsteps of the guard approaching her,  though they’re muffled by the sounds of the squeaky wheels and she lightly winces as she hears the voice of the guard speak to bellamy.    her heart begins to pound,  and she’s positive that he can hear it.    she almost expects the guard to throw off the blanket to reveal her but,  instead……..        “GOOD WORK.”         bellamy sounds convincing enough to the point where even she believes she’ll be dropped for the reapers,  until she remembers the plan.     bellamy wouldn’t do that to her.      she trusts him.       and she doesn’t expect that to change.

as the sound of the guards footsteps move along,  growing softer and softer as he moves further away from the pair a breath of relief is passed from the fake-dead girl upon the table,  sweating herself silly.    it’s a close call,  but they made it.    and that’s enough for her.      “i’mfine,” she whispers in a muffled, broken breath - thanks to the blanket and her never-ending nerves.     “just—-”   she cuts herself off, though, not wanting to make any more noise.    at least, not until they’re safe.           bellamy’s knocks on maya’s door send another breath of relief through the blonde’s nostrils.    they’re doing it, she thinks.   this is happening,  we’re saved.

                JUST    CALL    ME    HERO.                 but    is    that    what    he    is       ?       is    there    nobility    in    his    bones       ?                 𝙾𝚁    𝙸𝚂    𝙷𝙴    𝙹𝚄𝚂𝚃    𝙲𝙻𝙸𝙽𝙶𝙸𝙽𝙶    𝚃𝙾    𝚃𝙷𝙴    𝙷𝙾𝙿𝙴    𝚃𝙷𝙰𝚃    𝙼𝙰𝚈𝙱𝙴    𝙷𝙴    𝙲𝙰𝙽    𝚂𝙰𝚅𝙴    𝚂𝙾𝙼𝙴𝙾𝙽𝙴       ?                 that    maybe    ,    just    for    once    ,    he    won't    fail    someone.    knuckles    rap    against    door    ,                 ❝                 maya       ?       c'mon    ,                 ❞                 he's    pleading    for    an    outlet.    for    a    savior.    for    a    shelter    from    the    cold.                 don't    make    a    liar    out    of    me.    don't    let    me    be    responsible    for    the    demise    of    another    life. the    door    opens    ,    the    sliver    between    door    and    wall    displaying    a    pair    of    uncertain    eyes.                 ❝                 what    do    you    want    with    maya       ?                 ❞                 bellamy    parts    his    lips    ,    knowing    exactly    who    this    must    be.                 ❝                 MR.    VIE    ,    I    NEED    YOU    TO    OPEN    THE    DOOR.                 ❞                 but    the    door    is    already    being    snatched    open    ,    maya    coming    into    view    as    she    waves    him    in.                 bellamy    doesn't    waste    a    second    before    rolling    the    gurney    into    the    room    ,                 tapping    the    side    of    the    metal.                 ❝                 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄    𝐎𝐍    𝐎𝐔𝐓    ,    𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄    𝐒𝐀𝐅𝐄    𝐍𝐎𝐖.                 ❞                 but    is    she       ?       for    how    long       ?       when    mr.    vie    is    already    pacing    the    room.    already    cursing    his    daughter    for    helping    them.

[126126126126-deactivated2024060]

@damnbrain mentions spacekru friend au… @hisagony + i are both watching the reunion at the same time… i may be going a bit feral

apartment map here.

[leneemusing]

random sentence starters

“  i never asked for this/that.  ”  “  i said no.  ” “  she/he was the only one who ever understood.  ” “  help me understand.  ” “  if that’s what you want…  ” “  this is about me, for once.  ” “  maybe if you listened instead of running your mouth, you’d know what i was talking about.  ” “  it was a joke.  ” “  let me see that.  ” “  i don’t have a plan, but we’ll figure it out.  ” “  i like to watch the stars. it reminds me how small we all are.  ” “  i didn’t realize you were in so much pain.  ” “  i only wanted to help.  ” “  what are you smiling at?  ” “  why are you looking at me like that?  ” “  i know i have a right to be angry, but i don’t want to be.  ” “  i’m not sure what i’m supposed to feel.  ” “  don’t make me say it.  ” “  that doesn’t sound quite right, but okay.  ” “  i would never lie to you.  ” “  you wouldn’t get it.  ” “  just, let me have this, ok?  ” “  i need you.  ” “  just go.  ” “  how did this happen?  ” “  is this what you wanted?  ” “  love never really goes away, it just changes sometimes.  ”  “  stop trying to figure everything out. just focus on now.  ” “  you were all i wanted.  ” “  now that i’m on the other side of it, i guess i see now how little it mattered  ”

[beckerslasher-deactivated202106]

you   really   think   i   won’t   kill   you   right   now,   in   front   of   all   these   people??   :   you   have   so   much   trust   in   me   .   .   .   that   was   your   mistake.   /   ind.   scream   original   character.   screamed   by   rae.