out of context â itâs alway sunny in philadelphia â starters
tw: âŠmany things, but mostly alcohol & drugs
âyou know what it is, bitch.â
âi will eat your babies, bitch!â
âscience is a liar sometimes.â
âthis car is a finisher car, a transporter of gods! the golden god!â
âoh! botched toe. i botched that one. oh, thatâs a botched job.â
âsounds a little gay.â
âi just want to be pure.â
âyour hair looks small.â
âtell me iâm good, tell me iâm good, tell me iââ
âiâm going to have a really hard time if weâre both cannibals and weâre racists.â
âitâs covered in bird shit.â
âeverybodyâs dyinâ, bitch. letâs get you some fruit.â
âi brought along a saber.â
âoh, whoops! i dropped my monster condom that i use for my magnum dong.â
âis this why we had to wait for you to go to bed bath & beyond?â
âwild card, bitches!â
âhe only works out his glamour muscles.â
âcan i offer you a nice egg in this trying time?â
âcan i put beer in glue?â
âyou light one bitch on fire and everybody freaks out.â
âspeed has everything to do with it.â
âoh my god, nobody look!â
âweâre not giving you and eye. where the christ would we get an eye?â
âi will strike you down!â
âiâm learning some amazing moves from this guy.â
âum, one please. one rock of crack. one crackâ one crack rock.â
â40th beer of the afternoon.â
âthen weâre gonna throw you twice in the trash.â
âit seems like you have a tenuous grasp on the english language in general.â
 âwhatâs up bitches? iâm a man cheetah. wanna do somethinâ with this?â
âyou havenât thought of the smell.â
âiâm schizophrenic.â
âi didnât go to school for that.â
âeverybody get a weapon?â
âwhat is your spaghetti policy here?â
âhey, you guys! watch me bust out this sweet jackknife.â
âi am shattered to pieces.â
âthe boys are out tonight, huh?â
ânewsflash, asshole!â
âwell maybe you shouldnât dress like a bumblebee, bitch.â
âam i gay for god? you betcha.â
âi must insist on being referred to as cat.â
âdo you like it? itâs very generous.â
âlet me get this straight. you want to put your baby into a tanning bed.â
âweâre crab people now.â
âiâm not scamming the government, if thatâs what youâre saying.â
âi gained and lost 60 pounds in 3 months.â
âwell first of all, all things are possible, so jot that down.â
âif youâve got crack, letâs boogie.â
âno one is going into your asshole.â
âthe thunder of my vengeance will echo through these corridors like the gusts of a thousand winds!â
âwe bet youâd like 3 charming men to take your trash from you.â
âwhat about your favorite food, what would that be?â
âi like to recommend to our first timers our signature cocktail, caribbean paradise. some people say itâs better than bustinâ a nut.â
âwhat is white trash about that?â
âi forgot how to drive.â
âthat felt good, was that sexy?â
âhe faces his challenges instead of just retreating to the sewers, nude, to forage for rings and coins.â
âwait, that looks like a dick.â
âoh shit, thereâs stickers. my god.â
âi donât like to eat it with the skin. iâm not allowed to eat it with the skin. iâm not allowed!â
âsee, you got no commitment. youâre finished! youâre never gonna get anywhere in life!â
âi eat stickers all the time, dude!â
âthat doesnât sound right, but i donât know enough about stars to dispute it.â
âiâm waterboarding your sister.â
âdonât swim to europe.â
âitâs my understanding that there is a war going on right now.â
âi will smash your face into a jelly.â
âgatorade. and itâs gotta be my favorite flavor â blue.â
âseize the gap, you old fat bitch.â
âiâm the trophy husband. heâs my bottom.â
âdonât say stage freeze, just do it.â