Atypical Viewer

Bob's Burgers Through the Eyes of an Autism Mom

[atypicalviewer-blog]

Less than One Week Away....I will be posting my thoughts on my pieces that will be displayed at Geeksboro Coffeehouse.

[atypicalviewer-blog]

To label or not to label

There is much debate over whether it is enough to suggest a fictional character is on the spectrum. There were some wonderful comments posted regarding an earlier posting of mine on this topic.

I have given it more thought and I still support Tina Belcher not being officially diagnosed on the show. My big problem is for me to feel represented as an Autism family I would need for everything to be on display-warts and all. I would resent tidy plotlines where Tina struggled with a task or social skill with a therapist for half the episode and immediately makes a breakthrough. THAT is just as harmful to the atypical community as not being represented in my opinion.

The show parenthood explored asperger’s. And at first, my mom was telling me how cool it was to see that representation on screen. In the weeks that followed the introduction of the character’s asperger’s diagnosis, my mom began to voice “issues” she had with his storyline. She thought it had some great moments but as a whole sacrificed a lot of realism for running time.

An atypical person’s journey is not linear. And the therapies an atypical individual receives is not some “Rocky” montage of fast progress towards living an independent life. THAT is my issue. THAT is why I LOVE the depiction of Tina Belcher. We see a strong, well-cared for, smart, eccentric young teen negotiating puberty while still staying true to what makes her unique. The show doesn’t try to depict an abridged version of living with asperger’s or autism and in turn avoids patronizing the audience by painting an unrealistic depiction of being atypical. Bob’s burgers is the wrong format to show Tina going to ABA appointments, coping with meltdowns (larger than her comical hyperventilating “huh huh huh!"😫). It is more honest to show in 22 minutes a family negotiating what it is to be different in a world expecting them to fall in line.

And there was some discussion over Sheldon on Big Bang Theory. In all honesty, I’ve never watched one episode. I can only speak to the little segments I have seen in commercials AND word of mouth. But from what I gather my treasured show, Bob’s Burgers, is presenting a much more positive depiction of atypical family life. The Belcher Family would cut anyone that tries to belittle Tina. The best depiction of this was in season 6 with Tina riding her imaginary horse Jericho (voiced by Paul Rudd) in a horse show Bob and Linda paid for her to participate in. Were they angry she didn’t do what the other kids did? No. They cheered her on. THAT is what the viewing audience needs to see. Don’t give them a 22 minute neat and tidy view of Autism that tricks them into thinking they "get it now.” This autism mom is happy to look at the belchers and know the most treasured part of her family’s atypical journey is captured- the humor and compassion.

[atypicalviewer-blog]

We don't always need a label to see ourselves in a character. The green pteranodon on the right is eccentric, collects random items, warm but likes his alone time, vocalizes randomly and is described as being "very smart in a different way." My Daughter with ASD sees herself in this character. Does he really need a label for a child to relate?

[atypicalviewer-blog]

Fathers

I just lost what I wrote; which is probably every blogger’s greatest gift. I can now pretend it would’ve been brilliant! Such a shame. Plus I will be more brief with this second draft. Everyone wins!

Homer Simpson is a beloved television character. He is an alcoholic. He is lazy. He can be very self-centered. He is impulsive. Should I keep going?

But Homer loves his wife and kids. He always manages to convince us at least once during the 22 minute episode that he has a good heart and in another universe Homer is better equipped to show that affection. He is a flawed father. He is not the stepford dad’s of 1950s TV and he is not caustic like Archie Bunker. He is an important moment in character writing.

Enter Bob Belcher. We have only known Bob for 6 seasons compared to Homer’s 30. And yet Bob is a pretty well fleshed out character.

Bob had a tough childhood. He had a cold and distant father. We still don’t know what happened to his mother. He spent his childhood working-alone with homemade toys (sculpted bar of soap, spatula, brillo pad). Linda “loves all his sad stories.” But I have to admit so do I. Bob is written to be a man determined to not repeat his father’s mistakes. His family is truly everything to him. And he is not perfect. He loses focus, gets frustrated and is always exhausted. Sometimes he tries too hard to make a happy family and every parent with emotional baggage (so every parent) can relate to these moments.

He was an odd shy kid that loved cooking and creating punny names for his inventions. You can see Bob as a child promising himself to support his kids no matter what. And he does. He doesn’t always get it. Beefsquatch. The Equestranauts. Carpe museum.

But he ALWAYS tries to get it. That’s all a kid wants.

Happy Father’s Day.

[atypicalviewer-blog]

The Trouble with Tina

I often hear about the lack of characters with “severe” autism on television. I have read the blogs of parents that feel their child is further marginalized by the sea of mild and moderately autistic characters in tv and cinema.

I can understand the frustration of it being suggested Tina Belcher is on the spectrum. She doesn’t have any of the realities family like mine have: therapy appointments, severe public meltdowns, acute sensory sensitivities. But that is where I actually fell for Tina.

Let me back up a bit first…

When I get sympathetic head tilts and sad eyes hearing my daughter has autism, I am quick to reply “Autism is amazing, the autistic brain is beautiful and has a unique perspective on the world….but the side effects can sometimes suck.” Because that is true for our household. My daughter has an amazing brain with a unique view of the world. But she has to contend with a lot of obstacles to get thru the everyday. “With great power comes big public meltdowns.” That is the Spiderman quote right?

So in my mind, I see Tina as all of the beauty of the atypical brain without the obstacles. And I love seeing that on full display for 22 minutes. It’s a wonderful meditation for this autism mom because I get to see Tina display confidence, passion for animals, unwavering moral character, eccentric observations-and I think to myself “that is so my kid.”

[atypicalviewer-blog]

Atypical Predicament in Television

Regarding television and cinema, the common complaint in the Autism and neurodiverse community is “where are we?”

I can name a moderately sized list of fictional characters labeled as having asperger’s syndrome or autism. So where is the problem? The problem is that most often these characters are one dimensional and are defined by stereotypes instead of real character development.

We have all seen the classic signs of Autism in television: stoic demeanor, monotone speech pattern, obsessive, unintentionally rude to other characters, confused by social norms and just plain weird.

Are these traits of autism and asperger’s? Sure. But repackaging those traits again and again does a disservice to our community. People with Autism or any other atypical neurological label cannot be dismissed as caricatures in pop culture. They are not the punchline. They are not the plot device to teach the protagonist patience and empathy.

There are some positive depictions of the Atypical Community on television. I have never watched “Big Bang Theory” but I have heard from multiple people that Sheldon is a positive role model for their Atypical child. I can’t argue with that -even though I couldn’t get through an episode. Who am I to judge?

My favorite Atypical depiction in recent memory is the character of Will Graham on NBC’s Hannibal. Will being ‘on the spectrum ’ is barely mentioned. I love that. The writers focus on developing Will Graham, the person-not the cliché. And I found the character to be a refreshing new take on the spectrum. Will is pure empathy and it makes it hard for him to connect with most people. He is overwhelmed by his ability to observe and understand the motivations of everyone around him. This is a wonderful take on what it means to be “autistic.” Many people with autism describe eye contact as “weird” or “too intense.” Speaking from our own experiences, my daughter starts bawling when another child cries. She struggles to interact with that same kid but she can become fixated on their stress.

This is why I LOVE Bob’s Burgers. Tina, Louise and Gene Belcher have no label but all display traits of being “atypical.” And the viewing audience is treated to complex characters that humanize what it is to be different.

[ladyautie]

Hello ! I don’t agree completely with your reasoning and here’s why. Without the label, NTs are always prompt to dismiss that a character might be autistic. Worse, they might lash out at us, saying that we can’t take every quirky character and claiming that they’re autistic, that it’s “crazy”, that this character, clearly, “has not autism” because “i’ve seen Rain Man” or stuff like that. Even with a few mentions of the label, it can be dismissed. Take Will Graham, for example. Seriously, even the showrunners don’t dare to say that he’s autistic, even though it was mentionned. He’s supposed to have an “empathy disorder”, what kind of crap is that ?  They don’t need to throw the label at us again and again and again. Just saying it once or twice, clearly, showing the character displaying traits without an excuse like “he’s suffering from brain damage” and, why not, displaying a bit of neurodiversity here and there. For example, the video game “To the moon” mentioned several times two characters being “on the spectrum”, they quote authors of books about autism (Tony Atwood) and the characters are genuinely autistic and very different one from the other. I really like the autistic representation in “To The moon”. That said, NTs might say that Sheldon Cooper is a great representation, but a lot of autistic people think that he’s more a bad joke than something else. We’re supposed to laugh at him, not with him. And they’re still tiptoeing aroung his diagnosis, by the way.

[atypicalviewer-blog]

Completely agree about Sheldon. I was trying to be diplomatic about not watching the show since I know he means a lot to some people. But yes, you are on point.

[atypicalviewer-blog]

Atypical Predicament in Television

Regarding television and cinema, the common complaint in the Autism and neurodiverse community is “where are we?”

I can name a moderately sized list of fictional characters labeled as having asperger’s syndrome or autism. So where is the problem? The problem is that most often these characters are one dimensional and are defined by stereotypes instead of real character development.

We have all seen the classic signs of Autism in television: stoic demeanor, monotone speech pattern, obsessive, unintentionally rude to other characters, confused by social norms and just plain weird.

Are these traits of autism and asperger’s? Sure. But repackaging those traits again and again does a disservice to our community. People with Autism or any other atypical neurological label cannot be dismissed as caricatures in pop culture. They are not the punchline. They are not the plot device to teach the protagonist patience and empathy.

There are some positive depictions of the Atypical Community on television. I have never watched “Big Bang Theory” but I have heard from multiple people that Sheldon is a positive role model for their Atypical child. I can’t argue with that -even though I couldn’t get through an episode. Who am I to judge?

My favorite Atypical depiction in recent memory is the character of Will Graham on NBC’s Hannibal. Will being ‘on the spectrum ’ is barely mentioned. I love that. The writers focus on developing Will Graham, the person-not the cliché. And I found the character to be a refreshing new take on the spectrum. Will is pure empathy and it makes it hard for him to connect with most people. He is overwhelmed by his ability to observe and understand the motivations of everyone around him. This is a wonderful take on what it means to be “autistic.” Many people with autism describe eye contact as “weird” or “too intense.” Speaking from our own experiences, my daughter starts bawling when another child cries. She struggles to interact with that same kid but she can become fixated on their stress.

This is why I LOVE Bob’s Burgers. Tina, Louise and Gene Belcher have no label but all display traits of being “atypical.” And the viewing audience is treated to complex characters that humanize what it is to be different.

[atypicalviewer-blog]

Allow me to introduce myself

I am many labels but the one that pertains to this blog: autism mom. I am the mother of a precocious, sweet, smart, beautiful, funny and unique five-year old little girl. A little girl that was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder when she was 18 months old. I documented that time in another blog: www.bububabble.blogspot.com

Therapy appointments. Conflicting diagnosis. Sleep deprivation. Diet changes. New diagnosis added to old ones. Therapy pet. Stress, stress and more stress. Hardest working little girl. It’s all in there.

But this blog is not about that, at least not directly. This blog is about looking at something scary and uncertain, my daughter’s future, through the therapeutic lens of Bob’s Burgers. Their depiction of atypical children has meant so much to me and has helped me see my daughter and my family in a new light.

[atypicalviewer-blog]

Bob: "What's a blook?" Gene: "A blond cook. Blondes have more fun." Randy: "No. It's a blog I'm writing that I'm turning into a book. And then probably a bloovie."

-Bob's Burgers, Season 2 Episode 5 "Food Truckin"