Auspicious Anne

I adore cupcakes and I love corny jokes.

[rakan400]

[revolvver]

[windwaver]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[thegoodvybe]

[thenatsdorf]

[old-friends-senior-dog-sanctuary]

[thegoodvybe]

[mabylc]

me: not today, satan 

satan: you’ve been canceling our plans for weeks now. if it’s something i said, please just tell me

[clarabosswald]

so i saw this photo of a harpy eagle

and i thought “woah what a noble beast” so i searched for more photos and i just

even the babies

i mean

[frickingrimesarchive]

this goes with almost all predator birds 

like look at this bearded vulture

such a majestic creature

but then it’s like

or this scretary bird like woah so beautiful

nope

even good old bald eagle

like wow so regal

what

it just looks confused

[thewarblerette]

LIFE LESSON: DON’T LOOK AT MAJESTIC BIRDS STRAIGHT ON.

[auspicious-anne]

officer: license and registration

me: *hands officer a card*

officer: this is a get out of jail free card from the game of monopoly

me: yes

officer: you got lucky this time, have a good night

[andhumanslovedstories]

Do you ever eat popcorn out of the palm of your own hand with such ardent desperation that you feel like both a wild horse and the gentle schoolgirl feeding it treats to gain its affection 

[beauty-in-healing-deactivated20]

this is the funniest thing i have ever read

[henologist]

[liberianbadbitch]

I wanna be snoop dogg when I grow up

[babyjessibug-deactivated2020080]

I’m already him

[shortvideosandstuff]

[gnumblr]

bootycheck

[ran-nee-chan]

That’s some fierce booty.

[yisusfishus]

booty game HELLA STRONG

[gray-firearms-deactivated201905]

@soldmysoultobepretty

[fauxfable]

so my dad went boating and he sent me this video…😂

[teainawineglass]

OHHHHHMYGOD GIVE THIS MORE NOTES

[belovedsheith]

it’s 4 seconds just uNMUTE IT AND LISTEN

[gifyourass]

[snaacks-deactivated20200913]

i know sia doesnt want to be seen but was all this necessary???😩😩😩

[lobstersonskateboards]

It was definitely necessary

[sovietsofficial]

Mirror’s Edge (EA DICE, 2008)

[feazelblahg]

So is Sia like the coolest person to ever exist or something?? What kind of person comes standard with ninja moves

[citadel-souvenirs]

Isn’t she like 50