Autismarizz

Aroace with a PhD in accidental flirting.

[autismarizz]

Making fun euphemisms for dirty talk

I saw somebody asking how they can get dirty talk their partner better, because they really only have two words. Their partner likes being used for pleasure. So I wrote the following step-by-step guide and thought it might be helpful for others. The following is SO not work appropriate, BTW

It is paramount to consider your partner’s preferences. For example, some people enjoy objectification, some like being used, and others might like having their own lechery highlighted. Focusing language on the intended purpose will allow for tailoring language to maximally fuck with your partner. Also, a perfectly good euphemism can land horribly if that’s just not what they are into.

So let’s say you are playing with a toy. How do you talk refer to them around or during the occasion?

Identify your intended use-case. How are you playing with them today? Get specific.

List words that are similar to your intentions. If you like watching/doing a certain thing, is there another alternative that is similar? A thesaurus may be helpful in this process.

Pick alternatives from your list.

Add a sexually explicit adjective.

String it all together.

Tell your toy

Check results

Repeat as desired

Example: Do you like winding up your favorite sex doll and letting them spin around aimlessly, just to see what happens? You’re spinning your bawdy whirligig or winding up your salacious jack-in-the-box. And how dirty it is, that it just loves to be messed with like that. Maybe let them know how much you’ll enjoy it.

Remember to check in and see if your partner liked it though! They might not. And talk with them first about what to do if you say something they don’t like. Some people like apologies. Some people don’t. Repeat until satisfied.

You’re welcome ☺️

[jammatown919]

[autismarizz]

Yo, apparently a thing that makes it flirting is plausible deniability whether someone is displaying intimate interest! WOW! No wonder nobody can tell when people are flirting!

[autismarizz]

According to lots of research, NOBODY KNOWS WHAT FLIRTING IS. Nobody. That’s why we have culturally defined courtship practices.

The important thing to remember is that it is about

1 being respectful

2 showing your interest in another human being

So like, there is a way to do it wrong, but that depends on the person. Best way to figure out how to do it right is to talk to them. Figure out what they like and don’t.

[autisticnobody]

I don't know either

- Nobody

[autismarizz]

Gosh dang it, I thought you were the singular individual upon which I could rely.

[autismarizz]

According to lots of research, NOBODY KNOWS WHAT FLIRTING IS. Nobody. That’s why we have culturally defined courtship practices.

The important thing to remember is that it is about

1 being respectful

2 showing your interest in another human being

So like, there is a way to do it wrong, but that depends on the person. Best way to figure out how to do it right is to talk to them. Figure out what they like and don’t.

[prettyboykatsuki-moved]

touch-starvation needs to be written with emphasis on the starving part. you are hungry to be touched. so hungry that even the very taste of it makes you nauseous. it has been long since anything has ever touched you, ever fed you - that your body has grown more used to that gnawing emptiness more than anything else. it's better for you to be held, to eat but it makes you sick to try. you know

[autismarizz]

Pick-up line: Our eyes met. By Pokémon rules, that means we should fight. But fainting sucks, so let’s talk instead.

[autismarizz]

Cute date idea: you take your partner to a location about their special interest and have them tell you all about it.

[carnage-cathedral]

my partner said something that kinda rocked my world

[snow-nose]

ID: digital art of a smiling white angel dog and a sad black angel cat touching paws. the dog says "i'll still love you even if you never get better." the cat says "really?" the dog replies "i'll love you even if you get worse." end ID

[autismarizz]

Some autistic people might freak out when somebody they like flirts with them because the reciprocity is overstimulating. To accommodate, it may be helpful to

1 confirm if flirting happened and

2 communicate that you get overwhelmed and need to go slow. That might look like saying something along the following lines:

“Hey, I don’t always read things right but I caught a vibe and wanted clarification. Was there an attempt at flirting?”

“Thanks for clarifying. I tend to freak when there is flirting with someone I see romantic potential with. It’s not about you, it’s more about the lack of clarity since flirting is fundamentally a way to test interest without stating it directly.”

“I get overwhelmed sometimes when people I like reciprocate affection. Can we talk about pacing to make sure I am able to stay present?”

Remember, it isn’t about saying the right things. It’s about communicating appropriately.

[autismarizz]

If you are a person whose partner gets overstimulated by intimacy, it may be helpful to have a conversation with them about what sorts of things they find overstimulating. With good communication, trust, and moving at a slow pace, it is possible to build up what intimacy a person can handle. Of course, it is important to consider that your partner may have different intimacy goals and desires than you, and so it is important not to push them.

[autismarizz]

If another person is your special interest and they tell you about their special interest, does that mean your special interest is special interesting?

[autismarizz]

“No matter your neurotype, flirting is a bit of a mystery to most people. We try to navigate it with pretty vague advice like ‘make more eye contact’ (which sounds like my inner monologue when I’m masking), or the particularly unhelpful ‘just be yourself’. Most of us have probably had to ask a friend for tips or found ourselves Googling 'How can you tell if someone’s flirting with you?’ to try and decipher whether someone’s behaviour is friendly or something more.

Given that so often flirting is about reading between the lines of unclear body language and verbal cues, imagine how much more confusing it can be to those of us who are autistic. It’s difficult to recognise that we’re being flirted with, or to flirt intentionally - and sometimes we’re perceived as flirting when we’re only trying to be friendly.

But, contrary to popular belief, this doesn’t mean that autistic people are ‘bad’ at flirting. We absolutely can flirt, we might just do it differently to allistic people (people who aren’t autistic). Even if the ways we show interest, attraction and affection look a bit different, they’re still wonderful and deserve celebration.”

-Milly Evans

How do autistic people flirt? | Autistic Sex Ed — Milly Evans

No matter your neurotype, flirting is a bit of a mystery to most people. We try to navigate it with pretty vague advice like ‘make more eye

[autismarizz]

Some autistic people might freak out when somebody they like flirts with them because the reciprocity is overstimulating. To accommodate, it may be helpful to

1 confirm if flirting happened and

2 communicate that you get overwhelmed and need to go slow. That might look like saying something along the following lines:

“Hey, I don’t always read things right but I caught a vibe and wanted clarification. Was there an attempt at flirting?”

“Thanks for clarifying. I tend to freak when there is flirting with someone I see romantic potential with. It’s not about you, it’s more about the lack of clarity since flirting is fundamentally a way to test interest without stating it directly.”

“I get overwhelmed sometimes when people I like reciprocate affection. Can we talk about pacing to make sure I am able to stay present?”

Remember, it isn’t about saying the right things. It’s about communicating appropriately.

[writworks]

I made business cards for folks to flirt with on Canva after someone suggested the idea. I drew the little image in the bottom corner for the back using vector art in Affinity Designer. I'm not gonna do this, but other people are welcome to.

[autismarizz]

Okayyyy this is kinda cute though? Like imagine sheepishly going up to someone and giving them one of these? Cute

[autismarizz]

Spending time with you doesn’t cost me energy 😉