fakersystems

JUST A SPACE FOR MYSELF ABOUT / SYSTEM

[hazard-system]

How to Spot Fake Systems!

You don't! You don't spot fake systems!

Fake-claiming systems makes you an asshole! If you aren't their therapist or doctor, you have no right to judge their symptoms!

[puppyenergy]

[mintsau]

No actually now I'm caught in my feelings, persecutors deal with so much shit and they deserve a lot of acceptance and love and instead it seems the whole community kind of accepted they're angry and closed off and nothing else and that is not okay, and this may be just me being too much of a sap but it pisses me off. I know it's hard and that they say incredibly mean things but you shouldn't just cut them off because you feel like it and offer no help, that's a very shitty thing to do.

This is a persecutor appreciation zone, you've got it tough but you're doing your best and I appreciate you a lot!

[drumshoww]

"Whether you're drowning in 6 feet of water or 60 feet of water, you're still drowning."

You can't compare trauma. The worst trauma will always be yours. I say this not because i believe your trauma, or loss, whatever it may be, is worse than mine or anyone else. I say this because the worst trauma/loss you've experienced will feel as bad and is as important as someone else's worst trauma/loss.

Your first breakup might not be as bad as a 25 year marriage ending. But to you, that was the worst loss you'd experienced, so it felt just as hard.

Your trauma is no less important than the worst trauma in the history of the world. You can't compare trauma because they all matter. If it hurts you, you deserve the help it takes to heal.

❤

[mothric]

question, how do people with DID / OSDD feel about people who don't have DID / OSDD doing IFS (Internal Family Systems) therapy and using similar language of parts, protectors, persecutors, etc to describe their experiences and discoveries in therapy?

I ask because IFS is something that was suggested to me recently but I don't know very much about it. from the little bit that I've read, it seems like a very specific type of therapy that is meant for systems and I am not one, although I do have trauma. I have also seen some people in IFS referring to their own parts as 'alters' while clarifying that they don't have DID. so I'm a little confused. does this bother people in the DID community? is this therapy okay for singlets who otherwise carry trauma? can anyone suggest some reading or articles to help me understand more about this type of therapy and decide for myself if it's right for me?

[aethersvstem]

It's appropriate to use any type of therapy that you find beneficial.

However, IMO, it's not appropriate to use terminology spefific to DID/ OSDD if you don't have it - and therapists shouldn't either.

Singlets do not have alters, therefore their parts don't have "roles" in the same sense. Terms like alter, protector, etc shouldn't be used because that's inaccurate.

It's ok for a singlet to refer to parts of themself as things like "my inner child" or "my angry side".

[fakersystems]

IFS therapy was actually developed for singlets, rather than systems, so if you feel the therapy is best for you, go for it.

as aether system said though, just dont use terminology which was created for people with DID/OSDD, no matter what other people in the therapy are doing

[system-of-a-feather]

Stop using real mental health terms to explain normal experiences

OCD =/= Neat and Clean

Triggered =/= Getting Mad Over Something

Dissociating =/= Just Spacing Out

ADHD =/= Just Energetic

Autistic =/= Cringey

Bipolar =/= Liking two different aesthetic or whatever people like to use it as

People think this is okay, but most would agree that saying “I’m so epileptic” when you are hyper or jittery is wrong. Most people would say “Wow that’s so cancer” to someone who shaved their heads is wrong.

Stop changing serious and real terminology into something quirky, derogatory, or insulting. 

It is harmful and not hurtful.

Stop.

[myheartneedsatranslator]

The whole abused people becoming abusers theory is really quite damaging. For one thing it lets abusers off the hook by giving them a reason for their behaviour. It comes dangerously close to justification. Even more importantly it stigmatises the abused. The vast majority of abuse victims don't become abusers (at least 70% - probably not that different from the rate in the general population). We need to stop spreading this idea around, even if in some situations it does happen. The reality is there are numerous factors that contribute to someone becoming an abuser. Abused people are traumatised enough without the added fear that if we talk about our trauma people will think they're dangerous. And equating the abused with their abusers can lead to some really toxic consequences and greatly damage the self image of people dealing with the effects of abuse.

[sae-something]

is it possible to be a system formed by trauma that isn't abuse?

Absolutely! Any and all trauma (before the age of 6-9) can cause DID/OSDD. This is actually something we struggle with regularly because I wouldn’t say we’ve been abused, which sometimes makes us feel a lot of doubt and insecurity about being ‘valid’ or not. But really, all literature that I’ve read states it: all kinds of trauma can cause DID/OSDD. 

Even if parents/carers try their best and there is no abuse, sometimes parents/carers simply can’t provide what a child needs - because of medical issues (child and/or parent), mental illness (for example post natal or ‘regular’ depression), environmental issues (poverty, being homeless, death of a parent, being bullied, ...) and other things like that. Attachment trauma doesn’t necessarily stem from abuse either.

Something that often helps me is to try and see it ‘through the eyes of a child’. Things that may seem “rough but doable” for an adult, can be absolutely devastating for a young child. 

So yeah, long story short, trauma that’s not from abuse can absolutely cause DID/OSDD. 

Take care! 

[thelucidsystem]

💖 Hey fictives 💖

Did you know that you’re amazing? Whether your source is

💕 a tv show

💕 a movie

💕 a book

💕 comics

💕 fanfiction

💕 kids’ media

💕 fiction made by your system

💕 or anything else at all

You are valid! Your source doesn’t have any bearing on your worth. Whether you

💓 love your source

💓 hate your source

💓 feel disconnected from your source

💓 miss your source

💓 or have a complicated relationship with your source

You are valid! Being an alter is confusing enough without being an introject. Whether you

💞 are a direct copy of the character you’re based on

💞 have memories of life in your source

💞 have trauma from your source

💞 feel like your source is more real than this reality

💞 have a hard time accepting that you’re an alter and aren’t living in your source

💞 have very few things in common with the character you’re based on

💞 have no memories of your source

💞 act nothing like the character you’re based on

You are valid! Being an introject can be difficult to navigate. Whether your source defines you or you are completely separate from it, you are an important member of your system. Whether you are

💗 a main character

💗 a villain

💗 a background character

💗 an OC

💗 a member of a fictional species but not a specific character

💗 or any other type of fictional character

You are valid! Remember

💖 You were created because your system could not get by without you. You are needed. You are valuable. You are loved. Being a fictional introject is confusing and can be very difficult, but you and your system can get through this. It’s okay to be who you are. 💖

Endos don’t interact

[clever-and-unique-name]

“There is no logical or natural limit to how fragmented a dissociative patient can become. The more helpful question is What is the integrative capacity of the patient? The lower the capacity for the challenges the patient faced as a child and still faces in the present, the more dissociation will occur as an ongoing coping strategy.”  – Treating Trauma-Related Dissociation

Splitting dissociated parts is a very complicated, confusing topic–it can be difficult to determine when, why, and how it happens. As such, it’s perfectly okay to be unsure of whether a new part has split or not. Some things to know:

Splitting is a coping mechanism in response to stress

Not all stress causes splits

The same stress that causes a split in one person might not cause a split in someone else

The same stress that didn’t cause a split in the past may cause a split later; it all depends on the current coping ability of active parts

Some splits happen quickly; some can take much longer

Keep in mind this infographic pertains to people who already have DID/OSDD (you can learn what causes DID/OSDD [here.])

[Check out my DID/OSDD Casually Explained masterpost for sources and more infographics!]

[thesoftpsychotic]

you are not wrong for wanting attention. it’s a human need to desire to feel supported and cared about by those around you. please reach out.

[anxietyproblem]

[infjadvice]

[system-of-a-feather]

A Reminder Against the Tumblr Atmosphere

You aren’t invalid for having a small system. 

You aren’t invalid for not being able to communicate with your alters (this is normal in DID). 

You aren’t invalid for being able to co-front decently well with your alters (this is part of recovery and OSDD). 

You aren’t invalid for not having your alters show up all the time and introduce themselves. 

You aren’t invalid for your alters not having EXTREME differences. 

You aren’t invalid if you don’t have an inner world.

You aren’t invalid for wanting to consider yourselves all parts of one.

You aren’t invalid for wanting to consider yourselves all separate.

You aren’t invalid for not switching every day.

You aren’t invalid for having an alter that hurts you.

You aren’t invalid for not having an alter that hurts you.

You aren’t invalid for being comfortable with your disorder

You aren’t invalid for wishing you didn’t have your disorder.

You aren’t invalid for wanting to integrate

You aren’t invalid for not wanting to integrate.

A lot of these things are common to see in DID and OSDD. A lot of these things I have either seen been said, implied, or just not represented within the DID community here on tumblr so I felt that it was important to mention them.

Not all systems have everything other systems have. It is okay to be different from the common type of system shown online - there is a wide variety in DID and OSDD systems and a lot of different opinions.

[system-of-a-feather]

To those who are reading this, it is alright that you didn’t get to learn what you should have been able to as a child and as a teen.

It is alright if you weren’t taught what healthy boundaries are.

It is alright if you weren’t taught what love was.

It is alright if your ability to understand your sexuality was ruined.

It is alright if you never learned to understand and read your emotions.

It is alright if you never learned to care for yourself.

It is alright if you never learned how to be a “normal” adult due to what was going on in your life and any abuse that may or may not have happened.

It is alright to “be behind”. It isn’t your fault and it is never too late to learn. 

[the-unlucky-thirteen]

Growing up neglected can mean you don’t feel like you get to be picky about who gives you attention or what kind of attention you even get, you cling onto anyone who acknowledges your existence and it can end up so painful

[system-of-a-feather]

Recovery with DID / OSDD Without a Specialist

((Disclaimer: This is not talking about without a therapist as that is a different topic.))

Ideally, in a perfect world, when you go to find a therapist to help with your diagnosed / potential DID or OSDD, you would want to get someone with experience with dissociation and DID / OSDD. Ideally, having someone with that experience would be the best, but this isn’t a perfect world and the number of therapists available (especially with money restrictions) that have experience with dissociation aren’t the highest, then there are distance issues, and then there are just general issues such as being a minor.

A lot of individuals feel talk about seeing a specialist, someone who is trained to deal with this, but it isn’t like you can’t do anything with one that doesn’t have the training or expertise. While it might not be the best advised to work specifically on DID or OSDD issues as the focus of therapy with someone who is not trained, DID and OSDD are disorders with high co-morbidity with a number of other disorders, especially PTSD. As a result there are a number of other aspects of having DID and OSDD that can be worked on through a variety of ways.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is a wonderful form a therapy that can help the host / any part that might need it, learn to work on understanding oneself, why they do what they do and how to better respond. I spent the two or so years of my therapist that did a large amount of CBT and it had personally greatly helped reduce my issues with depression a good deal without necessarily having to delve into the trauma or breaking much of any dissociative barrier. It did a lot to manage a lot of the more stressful co-morbid symptoms that were driving me insane. Even if it doesn’t focus on DID or OSDD symptoms, working with this type of therapy can improve your life a lot and can be a wonderful first step towards recovery if you can find a good therapist for this.

Diabetical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) is another wonderful form of therapy that can greatly help the host / any part work on managing their emotions and handling state of high dysregulation. This form of therapy is incredibly common for PTSD and BPD which are two highly related disorders to OSDD and DID and can help manage a lot of the other not-directly related symptoms and issues.

Talk Therapy is a really common form a therapy for PTSD and in obvious manners, it can help work through some topics regarding DID and the trauma surrounding it.

Of course there are more forms of therapy and a specialists will consider using those three and aspects of them, but the point is that recovery with DID and OSDD does not have to be focused on the dissociative symptoms - at least not immediately. Recovery is about learning to manage the issues and learning to be able to be functionable and there is A LOT that can be done without directly addressing the dissociation and system as a whole. Of course it might be good to come up with, but general therapy and working on the smaller aspects can help be a first step.

Recovery isn’t a single set route. Many take many different paths to reach the end point of being able to comfortably live life with their conditions. Whether or not you can get a specialist or not shouldn’t be a huge deterent from getting any help.

Best of luck on all your recovery,

Riku (Host)