autumn

i’m autumn, she/her, trasngneder, probably not a bot but like who knows at this point

[ealoseum]

Suburban white woman sees a fly crossing the street towards her at night and instinctively covers her soda can with her thumb

[ninesugars]

A young man stands in a bunker. It just so happens that today, the 13th of April, 2029, is the day that eighteen antimatter plants are going to explode. Though he has just been transported back from the future, it is only today he will be given a name!

What will the name of this young man be?

> Enter name.

[taxitaxus]

me: if stephen king wrote the nutcracker it would be visions of teenagers fucking each others butts in the sewer dancing in his head instead of sugarplums right

subway sandwich guy: no thats not the nutracker thats some other shit i think

my friend who had too much monster this morning: wicked wiiiiiitch

[autumn1414]

ninja feet rage

[taxitaxus]

The greenese grunts were very tough

[c-horses123]

[c-horses123]

this is how that scene went I think

[autumn1414]

first we eepy, then we seepy

[firefox-official]

do you ever feel sad?

yeah i take drugs for that

[pukicho]

Whats that song that goes like “in love with the shape of you”

[the-upside-down-catface-deactiv]

shape of you

[pukicho]

Oh yeah that’s it

[pukicho]

I fucking hate that song

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Your thoughts on trees?

i like the one w/ the peely bark? bitch tree

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

this bitch

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

multiple people have responded with “it has eyes bc it watches your sins” and i did a terrific job choosing my primary social media site

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

almost no one in the notes noticed this is a BIRCH tree I was making a CHEAP PUN what is the point on baiting people with bad puns if no one is going to complain about it???

[one-time-i-dreamt]

My online best friends came to my hometown, we only spent like five minutes together before we collectively decided that we should live in the sea, but I'm scared of the sea so I just sobbed loudly and I woke up when one of my friends pointed at me called me baby.