[avalon68]

My newly-teenaged niece recently told me she enjoys Ao3. I had a visceral reaction, wondering just the flaming eff she was doing there when I stopped myself. I realized my reaction was due to MY reading choices on there.

All is well, carry on, can someone please get me a paper bag.

[avalon68]

I’m watching classic Doctor Who (Pertwee…he was my first) and he just took out three security guards with Venusian Jiu-Jitsu. Along came three more and these guys had rifles with barrels longer than Juliet Prowse’s legs.

Have I sufficiently dated myself?

Still…it was good to see the Brigadier as a young man again.

[bellasdumptruckass]

a teenager: dies

carlisle cullen:

[avalon68]

Oh, I love this.

[catasters]

[avalon68]

My God, what did you EAT

[avalon68]

We’re so not afraid of AI, because

[avalon68]

tumblr’s always been funny. Here’s a splash screen from a dozen years ago when they went over capacity.

The one running away with the modem is my favorite.

[michaelgovehateblog]

I would like to wish everyone an uneventful new year

[primarybufferpanel]

May we live in very uninteresting times

[broken-academia]

may you experience very precedented events

[delyth88]

We have reached the point where I wish this sincerely.

[sparklegemstone]

Yep, I think this speaks perfectly to where the world is.

[delyth88]

Ha. Well 2023, you're doing a spectacularly poor job of listening so far. :/

[avalon68]

May we all wear stolen shoelaces.

[chickenstab]

happy new bears!!

[chickenstab]

wait no don’t reblog this i meant years

[prospitdreamer-blog]

[avalon68]

Speaking for all of Chicago, I would like to request happy, new Bears. Our current roster needs help. TIA

[avalon68]

I’m re-reading The Hunger Games and just came across something especially painful. In the training room, Peeta tells Katniss they’ve picked up a shadow

…while they’re training with spears.

This hurts so much more because

Please excuse me while I cry even harder for a fictional child who died in the future fourteen years ago.

[avalon68]

Oh, Dick Roman…THIS is where you landed after being borax-bombed?

https://www.imdb.com/media/rm2890338561/tt16389768

Villains of Valley View (2022)

Lucy Davis, James Patrick Stuart, Malachi Barton, Isabella Pappas, Reed Horstmann, and Kayden Muller-Janssen in Villains of Valley View (202

[twilightbutokayer]

This is not at all a self-gratifying comic based on how i wished Charlie Swan was treated in canon

Read more Twilight But Okayer! | Twitter | Instagram | Ko-fi

[avalon68]

Had it been canon, this would’ve been AWESOME.

Because Charlie, y’all.

[hiddleston-daily]

[avalon68]

Reblogging to jazz up some ovaries.

[avalon68]

…and now I want to hear boulders colliding.

[avalon68]

We see stories about bridezillas and their insane demands (“It’s MY DAY and you will fall at my feet in worship!!!”) or how nervous some people are on their wedding day. I’m not claiming to be omg so speshulz but I don’t get it.

I’ve been married twice. The first time, I had the whole hoopla; Catholic Mass, bridesmaids & groomsmen, reception, etc. A few days before, the ring bearer’s father told me his son had fallen & hit his head the night before. My poor little guy! Thankfully, it wasn’t too bad (it was bad *enough* that he’d been hurt!) but, as his dad explained, he needed stitches. The dad thought he should offer me the opportunity to withdraw him from participating -he didn’t really believe I was shallow, but he was leaving it in my hands. I’ve seen some ‘zillas who would probably have nixed him for fear of this showing up in the pictures. To them, I say…drop dead. If you’re worried about the appearance of someone in your bridal party more than their appearing, you have more than a few screws loose.

Another thing that may have sent some twits spiraling; just prior to Mass, one of my bridesmaids told me that one of the Unity candles had broken. Not the main one, but the one I would use to light the big one with my husband (or…wasband, now). Totally not a big deal. I asked if the little tapers that the altar boys use could be left for me instead. Yep. No problem. All is well in the kingdom of me. The bridesmaid had opened her bit of news with, “Now I don’t want you to get upset, but…”. Really, I thought she was going to tell me the groom had been seen highjacking my limo. In truth, my brother pointed out the nearest exits to him & told him they were unlocked. Still, he stayed. What a trooper.

My uncle read the second reading. In the Catholic Mass, this comes after (wait for it…) the first reading and the Responsorial Psalm. Uncha goofy went to the altar immediately after the first reader finished. This is why you shouldn’t have blown off the rehearsal, Uncha. You could’ve seen your cue in the program as well, but I digress. Didn’t throw a hissy, though. We all just smiled at him, uncomfortably standing on the altar through the FIVE VERSE PSALM I personally chose. See, back then I was a Cantor so I put a lot of emphasis on the music portion of the Mass -much to the chagrin of my less church-y loved ones, I now regret.

I loved every bit of my first wedding, the things that went to plan, the spontaneous whoopsies, everything. I never had to take a breath (or a drink) due to nerves. I was surrounded by my favorite humans and there were lots of laughs, some serendipitous moments and all of the things that needed to happen to get this Papist wed happened.

My second wedding took place on a beach. Just the minister, me & my guy, a witness & the minister’s husband who recorded it for us. This wasn’t because I didn’t want the same ceremony as the first. No, I thought I’d already done that and, in my opinion only, felt that asking everyone to participate/attend another for me might be seen by some as a gift-grab. I know my closest loved ones would have gone along with whatever I’d asked, but that was a little outside my comfort zone. We sent out announcements after we eloped (most of our friends & all of our family knew we were doing this ahead of time) and some sent gifts anyway. I wrote thank you cards the day each arrived -unlike my first where I very, very shamefully sat on that duty way too long. It’s been decades and I still cringe when I remember that severe faux pas.

This was just something that’s been percolating in my head for a while & thought I’d write about it. Do you think I’m just overthinking the whole bridezilla thing? Were the whoopsies at my starter wedding minor compared to yours?

[tiktoksformyfriends]

[video by tommcgovern27. original caption: this one's going out to anyone living in a studio apartment rn]

[avalon68]

I’m still…even after all of these years…a Twilight fan. Even after enjoying the extra books (Bree, Life & Death), I still want more. Hellloooooooo fanfic.

That well is drying up, of course, as the original fan base ages. Some write off their earlier likes as an adolescent thing or say that after learning new ways to look at everything, they see the original stories as mysogonistic, stalkerish, controlling, etc. and now “know better”. Meh…I read a supernatural fantasy story and enjoyed it as just that.

SO…reading years & years’ worth of fanfic, I sometimes run across some canonical bit and am surprised at it. Now I’m starting the series again. No AU, just Bellward, meeting in Forks High School, wasting months and months due to Emoward’s angst & self-loathing, encountering danger all the time, Jacob being a pushy douchecanoe (regardless of the Resume connection) and a supernatural HEA. I do so love a happy ending.

[avalon68]

Vampires do everything faster than humans. So, if they talk faster (the brrbrrbrr vibrating sounds) than Bella can understand, they have to speak slowly around her.

In New Moon, when Bella stops Edward from exposure while in Volterra, all of the conversations with Demetri, Felix & Jane was slow enough for her to understand. In the throne room, the Volturi all slowed their speech for her?