Pondering...

NSFW blog. For my more... passionate rants. Contains dark content.

[azurillzz]

Welcome to my blog

You can call me Azu! This is my silly little writing blog :> I love the color purple and I'm a massive lesbian. I'm awkward but love interacting with people!! Don't be afraid to chat or anything, I'm friendly I swear >~<

Useful information:

I am pro-fiction and write about dark topics. Content warnings are given for fics containing said topics.

My asks are always open to ideas and suggestions, but there's a lot and sometimes theres are things I'm not into, so not every ask will be answered.

I am multifandom, but it's mostly Outlast Trials right now. Planning to write for Resident evil soon though.

This is a sideblog so if I don't follow anyone back thats why. I swear I do want to be mutuals... Sigh...

You can all find my fics over on my masterlist.

[brambllle]

If you're going to criticize men bc they don't respect women, then believe me, Franco Barbi will agree with EVERYTHING you say as long as he has hope that you'll let him suck your tits🤞🤞🤞

[azurillzz]

Would Franco sacrifice himself for big sister? As for her, she probably would. But I can't imagine them living without each other

I believe my latest barbicest post answers this!! More focus on big sister here :>>

CW: Incest, Sv1c1d3

Even if he had no power over the situation, Franco would still feel such immense guilt and grief that would result in him offing himself. So if he actually had stakes and if there was even a chance that his death would result in your survival? He'd do it in a heartbeat.

The only thing that could come close to making him hesitate this would be seeing you beg him not to do it. Of course, he'll still go through with it but if time allows, he'll spend his last few moments reassuring you. This will be the only one of his lies that you refuse to buy into. He'll be gone, and you'll end up helpless.

After the act, the guilt consumes you. You clean obsessively and you save every item and trinket that has even the most benign relation to him. It doesn't take long for it to truly hit. Before long, you find yourself cleaning through tears which splatter messily onto the counter. The more you wipe away, the more appear and in the end you break down.

He never taught you how to use Lupara, but you figure that it was only fitting to use his beloved weapon a final time.

There isn't really a situation where Franco would allow you to sacrifice yourself instead. Maybe only if it was a decision you made that he didn't know about, but the aftermath of that is about what you would expect.

[azurillzz]

Angst😮‍💨... In your opinion, how much would Franco's psychological state worsen if Big Sister Barbi died? What's worse, if it happens before Sinyala or after he's already there?

This is such a yummy scenario.... Accidentally left this to rot in my drafts for like a month,, I'm posting this now bc someone had a similar ask and I was like I could've sworn I already posted that. Evidently not, oops.

TW: Incest, Su1cid3 (Franco uses Lupara on himself don't take this lightly)

In the event that you die pre-Sinyala, Franco would want to follow not long after. Of course, not before taking care of unfinished business. Unlike him, youre health, spry—full of life. You dont just drop dead.

He tries to deny it when he sees you passed out on the couch. He fruitlessly tries to shake you awake, hoping you truly were asleep, but a deep pit formed in his stomach the moment you didn't respond to him calling out for you.

Franco was a man with many enemies and he was no idiot. He sobers up in time.

He thought he did a great job of keeping you seperate from all his business. Well, it turns out that he wasn't great enough. A small glass bottle sits on your pristine counter. A bottle of poison. A taunt.

In an anger fueled stupor, he goes out and hunts the man responsible. There are in-betweens of the chase where he can do nothing but wait. In this time, full body sobs that wrack through his very being become a very intimate friend of his.

He's back to that snivelling, helpless kid he once was. But this time, you're not there to make it all better. Not there anymore like you were for the entirety of his miserable life. There's nothing he can do past this—nothing waiting for him.

He makes quick work of the culprit and makes a stop for some liquor. He drowns himself in alcohol—the only strength that would keep him moving at all—and then he goes back home.

He knows you hated it when he smelled like alcohol and when he didn't hide Lupara properly. He would've laughed at the irony if he had the energy to. He digs your grave and chucks you in through tears. You still look as beautiful as ever.

With the job done, he hunkers down and cries some more on your shared bed. He's sobbing in the fetal position for several hours before he finally gets up and uses his beloved Lupara one final time.

I believe it doesn't matter whether you die pre or post Sinyala. The ending will be the same. Maybe the process gets a little bit sped up in Sinyala but he still ends up offing himself in the end. The reagents meet a swift death, and his follows shortly after. He makes the decision faster because he is not keen on Murkoff keeping him alive to poke and prod at. He cries by your side before ending himself there next to you.

[azurillzz]

Franco fucks reader with Lupara. what do you think abt this?

👀

He enjoys the pain he's able to inflict on you, and relishes the expression you make. Getting a taste of the power he thinks he is owed does wonders for his psyche.

Being able to see your hole accommodate something so big naturally lets his imagination run wild with other things it can stretch for. He's not going to act that out yet, but the idea certainly was tantalizing. Hm, maybe he would stuff something else of his up there. Something that stretches you just as much as his beloved Lupara.

He likes to abruptly cram it into you just to see you writhe and cry about how big it is and he likes seing the traces of blood on it when he withdraws the barrel and definitely goes to lick it while you watch. I'd like to say either he licks it clean or makes you lick it yourself depending on who you are to him lol. In either situation, he likes making a show of the whole process and likes seeing any drops of liquid that were missed drip down further into the gun.

I also imagine that he likes to rut against the gun while it's still wet, enjoying that you're watching him debase himself over an object.

[azurillzz]

I know you made a poll about this a while ago and what I'm about to say directly goes against that poll but PLEASEEEE make sister barbi an oc. She basically is one at this point

Idk I really enjoy your barbicest writings and I feel like they could go so much farther without the excuse of her "technically" being a reader insert

I'm sorry if this comes off as really annoying or pushy or disrespectful, like I said I really like the way you dissect Franco and his relationship with his sister and am happy taking whatever you write

I really do think about it when I write and tbh it really makes sense for me to make her into an oc,,

It probably will happen eventually but I find making ocs difficult so I'll probably take a while just doing that in the background lol, especially since I already am very comfortable writing her as a "reader insert" already.

Probably she will be an actual oc when I finally make a long form narrative for them. I love the Barbi siblings I want to point a magnifying glass at them.

But for now, I don't think her being a "reader insert" actually affects how I write her much. I already have a strong sense of who she is and am not really thinking about the inclusion of "reader" when I write her. To me, she already is an oc of sorts that I write for in second person. I just don't like thinking about names and what she would potentially look like </3

It's gonna be a slow process for me to think about those details, but it will happen in time ☝️

[azurillzz]

I have GOT to stop writing and posting things while half asleep mb I keep thinking I'll write something quickly before bed but then writing it stretches my bedtime and by the time im done I can barely see straight, if my latest posts are kinda ass thats the reason... Anyways I'm just posting this then heading to bed hope you liked more of big sister barbi okay goodnight lovelies honk shoo honk shoo

[azurillzz]

What was Big Sister's relationship with Angelina like? Did they dislike each other?

Extra stuff in the tags because I feel like its relevant but not enough to find a place in the fic ok bye I loved this ask

CW: Incest

For the most part, I think you liked Angelina. She was a nice woman, and you preferred her over a lot of Salvatore's old wives. She made your family feel a little bit more normal, which is why it was understandable why Franco wanted to spend more time with her nowadays. Nevermind that she was your age, it was nice to have someone to look up to in the world of a woman.

As for how she viewed you, I think she was pretty impartial. She was definitely nice enough to earn your favor because of your proximity to Salvatore, but she found Franco to be much easier to entertain.

You were naive yes, but Franco was a man—one whose desires were easy to read. She did appreciate your naiveté as it made fooling around with Franco easier, not having to worry about you being too big of a problem as you trusted what either she or Franco had to say with little to no question.

You being easy to manipulate meant Franco would not be much harder, as much as he would like to think otherwise.

Them paying more attention to each other did make you sad and frustrated in a way you could not yet describe, but you couldn't fault Franco for preferring a woman like her—a pretty lady like her who held your fathers approval. She would have been a role model to you—exactly what your father needed you to be.

But you were not like her, and the fact seemingly even Franco was seeing that now... Hurt. But Franco noticed your shift in mood and hated it. He would try to spend more time with you and reassure you as best as he can.

But since he hasn't been with you sexually yet, he gets pent up which results in his escapades with Angelina to become riskier. This eventually became the reason Salvatore caught them and kicked Franco out.

[azurillzz]

how clingy do you think franco would be to big sister during the trials? it's pretty hard to cuddle with her when he has to chase reagents

I also think that older sister would have a ranged weapon. she is not physically strong enough to defeat someone in close combat

CW: Incest

If anything, I believe Franco would try his very hardest to keep you out of his trials. The only reason you're in sinyala with him is because he would not cooperate, not knowing if you were safe out there or not.

As long as he knows where you is and that you're safe, he is okay. He was used to leaving you at home to go do his business, after all. So he makes you stay in wherever the prime assets are held when not in their trials.

In the unlikely event that hes not allowed to do that, he makes you camp out in a place he deems safe that changes with every trial you are on. He's not really clingy during the trials at all, not wanting to lead reagents to your position knowing what they can do.

He can't help but worry, however. If he doesn't know the position of any reagent in a prolonged amount of time, he patrols the area where you are in line of sight and makes sure you're okay. At some points, he makes you move spots to make sure your location is not obvious. A stationary taget is an easy one.

Franco definitely forced Murkoffs hand to get you a gun for your safety during his trials. Really, it was impressive how much he could get done with a tantrum or two. Well, that's what the scientists want him to think at least. Studying your dynamic with each other was good research, so they were inclined to hand what either of you needed.

In game, I feel you'd function similar to a trap. You'd change positions every time you have to shoot at someone, to not risk anyone coming back and finishing you off. Franco is also familiar with the sound of your gun, and knows the spots to check whete you rotate.

Franco may be clingy, but your safety is still above all. The trials are only temporary after all, while you are his forever.

[rinthalia]

Writing cute letters to find them later stashed away in his night stand covered in stains <3

[azurillzz]

hihi, i recently discovered ur page and i have to say u’ve become one of my favorite writers for franco !!

bc i love sharing information with people who like the same stuff as me, i wanted to share something i realized abt franco’s psyche, if u wanna write something abt this by all means but i just like telling people bc it’s very interesting (i’m a psych major who minors in childhood development and how it affects people in adulthood lol)

idk if u’ve noticed but in pleasure the prosecutor, when u dismantle the mannequins one by one, they say a number of pre-recorded lines, most of them are what u’d expect to hear from a pre recorded sex worker made specifically for franco, but one of them sometimes will say “i want u to put a baby in me” or something like that and i always found it interesting bc obviously the biggest pin point in franco’s character is his lack of a stable mother figure mixed with the mob life where having a woman/multiple women meant u were hot shit, turning him into a violent and sexual deviant with severe mommy issues, hence why he obviously referes to women as “mommy” “wombs” etc.

but that mannequin really throws something new into the mix which in my opinion makes franco more interesting, kinks heavily tie in to psychology so the mommy play and the bordering on sadism makes sense given what we know, but this sex mannequin made for franco, emphasis on MADE FOR FRANCO, saying “i want u to put a baby in me”, to most is like “oh breeding kink, makes sene bc of his obsession with wombs and being born” but i think it’s more than that. i think it shows us that franco is more of a mess than we think, i think franco is stuck between wanting to me dominated and being dominant both in bed and out.

for someone like franco who has such low self esteem, sure he gets off on humiliation which plays with his self esteem jusstttt enough, but i think him being told that a woman wants to be impregnated by him gives a subconscious boost bc in his eyes “wow i’m so good u wanna have my kid ??” but it also plays to the second have of him that wants to be a man’s man, he Wants to feel like a regular tough guy, masculine, LIKE HIS FATHER, AND THAT’S WHY HE WAS FUCKING AROUND WITH ANGELINA, IT WASNT JUST ABT THE HUMILIATION, HE WANTS TO BE LIKE HIS DAD AND HE WAS INVOLVED WITH HIS DAD’S WIFE, BOOM SEE HOW I JUST CONNECTED ALL OF THAT BACK TO CHILDHOOD TRAUMA #IMHIM

anyways, yeah i just thought it was an interesting new take i wanted to share, sorry for the long rambling lol, KEEP UP THE GOOD WRITING I LOVE IT

- lyv

Tyy ur so sweet,, so cool that my Franco rambling makes sense to someone who studies such topics ToT

Not adding onto this bc you put it so well this read on him is so peak,,

[azurillzz]

I want to follow back so many people on this blog but its just a side blog and I dont want you guys seeing my main... Ugh =_=

[morguestalker]

Franco would put various objects inside reader and force her to keep them inside just for fun, trust me

Oh absolutely. (I never really know how far i can go on this blog, i never wanna write anything where someone sees and is like...woah...this chick is CRAZY!!) but... my blog, teehee. I shall talk about whatever i want >> (cue "objects i've shoved up my ass") Just in case: TW for object insertion. (please never put any of this inside you, gamers. ESPECIALLY IN YOUR ASS!!). dubcon. mentions of belly buldging. size kink? maybe? aludes to...uh...birth. (it's franco not me, you gotta believe me.) general franco nasty behavior lol, very self indulgent.

While there are sex toys available in the sleep room for reagents, I'm not really sure if those same toys are in trials? Aside from gooseberry's factory, but, the only time you'd ever see Franco there is during prime-time. And I really doubt those pesky scientists would let him take a nice toy back for his dolly.

ED is a bitch for him. Sometimes, he desperately wants to fuck you but just- cant. His cock won’t cooperate sometimes. So? Random objects it is. Plus, it’s funny seeing how scared you get, wondering if the things he’s shoving inside you are even sanitary or not.

All he really has is the things he can find scattered around the trial environment, or, the things he keeps on himself… starting off small, I could def see him stuffing his pacifier inside you on occasion. He doesn’t even have to be in a sour mood for that one. He’d fuck you with the gummy end before pushing it all the way in, making sure the string originally attached to his bowtie is still there so he can pull it out nice and slow when he feels like the time is right. Your uncomfortable face as you squirm is priceless, and the thought of sucking on it once it’s been inside you for a bit has his stomach doing flips. Mmm…mommy flavored.

I could also see Lupara going inside you if you piss him off enough. Or, sometimes you don’t even need to piss him off… I'd like to think that’s how a lot of women met their end with him. Franco has like– zero trigger discipline, that man keeps his finger on the trigger regardless of how he’s holding it or where it is. So, even though he likes you far more than the prostitutes he used to hire…he still keeps his finger on the trigger as he makes you take the barrel of Lupara. It’s thick, filling, splitting you apart in a way you didn’t know was possible… painful? Maybe a bit. You weren’t properly prepped because Franco doesn’t understand prepping imo. Why should he care? Just shut up and take it.

He gets off knowing your life? Fully in his hands. If he just pulled that trigger back, you’d have a hole where your womb used to be. (Or your guts…if you’re an anal connoisseur.) I don’t think he’d keep his Lupara inside you for extended amounts of time, only because he’s so attached to the damn thing…but i could see him fucking you with it for an hour or two. Pushing it up, trying to see your tummy bulge… yucky lmao. 

As for things he’d keep inside you, and make you walk around having inside you…hmmm…glass bottles are a good contender. Esp if you’re an ex-reagent and you used to throw them at him. He’d have a good time stuffing the end of it inside your hole, fucking you with it til you either cum or bleed, then leaving it inside you and making you get up and walk around. It’s thick, pushing right up against your g-spot every time you even so much as breathe…the full sensation would probably feel pretty good but I'm also a diabolical freak lol don’t listen to me. 

He’d enjoy watching you waddle, whimpering with each step as your hole squeezes around the glass that threatens to shatter inside you. He wants to keep your cunt full, saying something cruel like he doesn’t trust you to keep your legs closed on your own. He’d only take it out when he’s had his fun…which… could be anywhere from a few hours to all day. So, good luck!!

Tbh anything phallicly shaped? Probably going inside you. He isn’t picky and he doesn’t expect you to be picky either. His fav though? Baseballs. They’re a dime a dozen in the suburbs, scattered around in yards and houses. The mannequins aren’t using them…with their plaster smiles, forever still in suburban bliss. Might as well put them to good use with you, right?

It isn’t so much the insertion that gets him off, it’s…well…watching you push it out later, once he’s had his fun watching you walk around with it inside you. I don’t think I need to be descriptive with this but, there’s a very good reason he enjoys seeing you push them out… (yuck lol). He’s a gross guy!! Probably imagining it’s him in there… Okok i’ll shut up now lmfao.

object insertion is def one of his kinks tho... i do agree nonnie!!! I know it's not everyone's cup of tea but it's MY cup of tea and you WILL listen to me be nasty about it. >>

div credit: @.fic-dumpster, @.saradika-graphics

[azurillzz]

Sometimes I worry that I've written so many different pieces of Franco and his big sister that things are starting to get messy and not make sense erm

[azurillzz]

At what point will Franco first touch big sister in a way he shouldn't? Will he think "Well, I've been holding back too long, I should have touched her boobs" in the middle of the day and do it? Or will it happen (almost) by accident?

I finally made the tag for the siblings so you guys can follow it if you want to see any smaller snippets I write <33 love u guys mwah mwah

CW: Incest

I think this ask fits in with this piece I already wrote for them.

Theres no one moment where Franco just decides to grope you. Physical touch has always been big between you two, even as innocent kids. You were the one always huddling and shielding him with your body when the screams and sounds of violence of your household got too much. Physical touch always brought you two comfort.

Ideas of that touch being escalated to something more were introduced to Franco early, when Salvatore brang him along to learn the ropes of the mafia. While your father talked over some deal, Franco's little eyes derted every which way. The woman on the stage, the pairs of people littered outside, the salacious posters stuck haphazardly along the walls.

Sights no young boy like him should be seeing. Seeing these things on the regular turned into fantasizing, and then into wanting. He wanted something that just wasn't possible for a guy like him, so his sights turned into the closest woman available.

To his credit, he managed to try and stave away these thoughts for a while, but with the hormones of his teen years comes with urges he no longer has control over. His little self control proves useless against his needs as a young man.

It's slow, but his touches start to linger. You think he's just having a bad day, but its just that waters being tested. Light groping and wandering hands are all but natural progressions. You've become an expert of giving the benefit of the doubt by now. You don't even blink when he does it.

He's in a bad mood and he's been testing those waters for so long now that you're deemed ready. He plays up the dramatics and finally crosses that line. He genuinely does need the comfort, so hes taking advantage of the opportunity to finally get even closer with his beloved big sister.

[azurillzz]

God bless Big Sister Barbi's patience... I feel sorry for my girl

Both siblings deserve so much better 😿

I've gotten to really love big sister as a character she's just optimistic to a harmful degree. She only sees the best in Franco even if he's the one hurting her at times.

I might make a tag just for them soon so these short answers dont have to clog the main franco tag whahaha

[azurillzz]

Is it really me if my smut headcanons don't come with at least a little bit of a character read