Is Submission really for you...
I receive a great deal email from men who say they are submissive and want advice on how to find a Dominant woman to guide them. But it often turns out that what they really want is a woman to cater to their submissive side when it comes to sex (kinky sex). So the questions comes up, “Are you really submissive? Or are you only sexually submissive?”
As it turns out, only you can answer that question. But in order to do that, you must separate your sexual desires from the rest of your life. That is, outside of sex, do you still want to serve? Do you want to wash dishes, vacuum the carpets, make the beds, etc., etc., etc.? Do you really want a woman telling you what to do all the time…
If you are not ready to a woman to take total charge of your life, perhaps you should simply join a local BDSM group so that you can get your “Kink” out without getting bound up (pun intended) in something you are not prepare for. Don’t get me wrong…
In a real Female Lead Relationship, a woman does not always even want to control her man all that much. She may only want to be in direct control over her sex-life. She can, and should, control any and all aspects of the relationship that she feels comfortable controlling. Perhaps she wants to maintain the final word on things and lets her partner handle the day-to-day routine things that she used to do. Things like cleaning, cooking, doing the laundry…
Many FLR’s don’t appear very different from any other relationship, on the outside. Maybe her partner handles the financial end of things. Maybe she still does the cooking. She may even want to be on the receiving end of most of the sex. These things are all simply her choice. After all, if she is in charge, she can do whatever she wants, including the laundry, if that is the way she wants it…
Serving as a submissive in an FLR means that you serve out of love. If you don’t love the woman you are serving, then your life will not be what you expected, no matter what the sex is like.
So, gentlemen, when looking for a Dominant woman to take over your life, to love, to cherish, to obey, be yourself. Be strong in who you are. If you try to be someone you are not, you will fail… Miserably…
From Mistress Ivey’s blog “Becoming a Mistress”
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