one thing i do want to say though is i think as h*mosexual women but also just as women in general is that we need to recognize that âiâm not performing for menâ is only one half of the picture. maybe you donât want menâs approval but how much do you need womenâs acceptance? how much are you smoking and drinking and doing coke and running and dieting and posting about forgetting to eat and performing other kinds of violence for the approval of other women? how much pressure do women put on you to negate the features of your body or your race or your sexuality or anything elseâŠcan you get away with stimming around other women? can you get away with not shaving? can you be around your female friends and feel fat without saying âi feel fatâ so no one would mistake you for not punishing yourself for what is (erroneously) assumed to be a âtransgressionâ of the body? can you look ugly and know that the female store clerk or the barista or the girl at the sink next to you or the girl on the bus with you or the girl with you on the elevator on the girl you have to squeeze past in the lecture hall to get out of the aisle will be kind and respectful to you and not act disgusted. can you be around your female family members without them commenting on your body? so much masochism and violence remain normalized among women because we say âwell Iâm not doing it for men, so itâs my choiceâ but how much are you doing out of a fear of women?Â
and thats how things like makeup and shaving get baked into âfeministâ rhetoric because we forget the degree to which feminity is enforced by other women, not men. so even for people who have no stake at all in being appealing to menâŠthereâs still the threat of being punished by women. and every post thatâs critical of makeup or whatever that ends up with reblogs that say things like âlearn to do eyeliner uglyâ or whatever stupid shit just proves that. weâre out here doing the same things weâve always done weâve just replaced âattracting menâ with âplacating other womenâÂ
