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The Parable of the Eagle

I stumbled across this story when I was reading my book, earlier this morning " Born to Win." I was so impressed with this parable, that I  absolutely had to share. I hope this story touches you.. and stays with you always, especially in times when you feel completely and utterly lost. Print it out, carry it in your purse, and make sure you have access to it when "emergencies" arrive. Enjoy!

      “The Parable of the Eagle”

James Aggrey

Once upon a time, while walking through the forest, a certain man found a young eagle.

He took it home and put it in his barnyard where it soon learned to eat chicken feed and to behave

as chickens behave.

One day, a naturalist who was passing by inquired of the owner why it was that an eagle,

the king of all birds, should be confined to live in the barnyard with the chickens.

“Since I have given it chicken feed and trained it to be a chicken, it has never learned to

fly.” replied the owner. “It behaves as chickens behave, so it is no longer an eagle.”

“Still,” insisted the naturalist, “it has the heart of an eagle and can surely be taught to fly.”

After talking it over, the two men agreed to find out whether this was possible. Gently, the

naturalist took the eagle in his arms and said, “You belong to the sky and not to the earth. Stretch

forth your wings and fly.”

The eagle, however, was confused; he did not know who he was, and seeing the chickens

eating their feed, he jumped down to be with them again.

Undismayed, the naturalist took the eagle, on the following day, up on the roof of the

house and urged him again, “You are an eagle. Stretch forth your wings and fly.” But the eagle

was afraid of his unknown self and world and jumped down once more for the chicken feed.

On the third day, the naturalist rose early and took the eagle out of the barnyard to a high

mountain. There, he held the king of birds high above him and encouraged him again, saying,

“You are an eagle. You belong to the sky as well as the earth. Stretch forth your wings now, and

fly.”

The eagle looked around, back toward the barnyard and up to the sky. Still he did not fly.

Then the naturalist lifted him straight toward the sun and it happened that the eagle began to

tremble and slowly he stretched his wings. At last, with a triumphant cry, he soared away into the

heavens.

It may be that the eagle still remembers the chickens with nostalgia; it may even be that he

occasionally revisits the barnyard. But as far as anyone knows, he has never returned to lead the

life of a chicken. He was an eagle even though he had been kept and tamed as a chicken,

Just like the eagle, people who have learned to think of themselves as something

they aren’t, can re-decide in favor of their real potential. They can become winners.

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Reality Check

Let's go back down memory lane, shall we?

Let's recall, for a moment, our childhood. Ah, the simplicity of life! The joys of summer and the adventures on the playground. Things were easy (er). And as contradicting as it sounds, being that we were under "control" by our parents and our school teachers, and pretty much any adult we came in contact with, we felt, more than ever, free.

The most important thing I'd like you to recall, since we're road tripping and all, is your envisioning; your dreams, your creativity, and your idea of possibility.

Do you remember dreaming without boundaries-- anything you wanted to dream about-- nothing was too silly, or too far fetched?

Do you remember, ever, wishing for something and then slapping yourself silly in hopes to "wake up" from such a fantasy? Do you remember ever uttering under your breath, "but that will never happen?" If you do, you probably remember this near the ledge of childhood, right before you take the jump into teenage hood or adult hood ( the "fun" ages). Chances are, however, that you don't remember this, because years ago, when you envisioned the future, nothing was impossible, and reality, quite frankly did not exist.

Oh childhood- full of innocence, full of possibility, and then all of a sudden, this light that we inevitably, all of us, exhibit in our youth begins to fade away. Our dreams, our gift of seeing beauty in everything, dims, and for some, goes away completely.

Well, unbuckle your seat belts "adults," the trip, a wonderful trip at that, is now over. Back to reality, right? Back to living day to day miserably at a job you can't stand, merely to survive. This is the real world right? Let us all push those feelings, the ones you just felt reminiscing, back into their hiding places. We are back in the grown up world now.

The grown up world-- makes me chuckle.

Now many will argue, " well, we weren't old enough back then to understand responsibility or the real world." My response to that? Blah. Another optional response: blaaaaaah, with a disgusted face and mean snarl, and that kind of " what did you just say" look that people do with their eyebrows.

What real world? We create our own, individual, very unique.. world.

What responsibility? Isn't neglecting your dreams dismissing our most important, divine, responsibility; living our lives as we wish to live? Isn't being happy one of the most important responsibilities we can have?

Oh grown ups, mature individuals, I employ you to reconnect with your heart, to reintroduce yourself to your imagination, and to, for the life of you, entertain the thought that you can be, still, whomever and whatever you wish to be. I employ, no I beg this of you.

I beg you to acknowledge that dreams are designed for chasing-- that they are worth chasing. And if you cannot do this for yourself, then do it for your children. Your child, entrapped in a beautiful world of magic at the moment, is going to stop playing. They are going to stop dreaming, and one day, they are going to stop believing in themselves, if you, their idol, do not teach them that how they are now, is precisely how they need to remain.

Here's to teaching our children that dreams are achievable, and that our potential is reachable through following our own ambitions and strengthening ourselves.

Dream on,

Nicole Almond

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The Habits You Do, That Mold Your Child

Your children replicate your actions, precisely. Surprise! Ok, we all understand that we, being the parentals, are closely examined by the toddler eye. We know this, and although we consciously tell ourselves we're going to keep the cursing outside the doors and the fighting with our significant others to a minimum, we often forget that it is not only our words that are imprinted on their tiny but oh so significant minds, it is our actions. Our actions, our habits, are what are replicated, and what's so destructive about this truth is that it is often not noticed until it's too late.

Habits of course, are built. They are done over and over and over again, until you stop acknowledging that you're doing them at all! It becomes part of your life, your routine. It becomes part of you. And these things, these habits, are so ingrained in your day that without being aware of what it is you're actually doing and why, your child is watching all of it, and because they correlate you with "what is right," They too will begin to act in the very same way.

Now the fact that your children replicate your habits, thus creating their own,does not necessarily have to be a bad thing. Habits come in two forms: good and bad. All good habits are created to serve a useful purpose; growth, while all bad do the complete opposite. They are the habits that keep you drifting, that destroy your health, or that produces disdain and resentment with your significant other. These are the "enemy" habits, and unfortunately, your child cannot tell the difference between these destructive, day to day "little" things, and the actions that stimulate growth. It is not their place to differentiate-- it is yours.

So the next time you put on your gym shorts and fight the forces of laziness, by doing that "in home" fitness program, ask your tot to join you. Include them in your habit, and make a point to influence the good of it. And on the flip side, the next time you acknowledge yourself doing something for no particular reason, or for a reason that promotes destruction, whether of your heath or your soul, make a conscious decision to replace it with some form of beneficial habit. it will be difficult, and perhaps you may find yourself content with it, but the question you need to ask yourself is whether or not it will benefit your child. Because if it will not benefit them the least bit, or if it will lead to some form of destruction, it is most definitely, time for a change.

Here's to healthy habits, and the upbringing of a healthy, positive tomorrow.

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Seeds of Greatness

Give it a try, shall you? I dare you to "affirm" this, for 60 days, every morning. I promise, that if you put your heart into it, you will feel smarter, more confident, more patient, fearless, and more in control than you ever have.

Remember, what you tell yourself "you are..." is precisely who you become.

Affirmations for YOU:

I am smart.

I am confident.

I am not only patient with others, but patient with myself.

I am unafraid.

I am the master of my thoughts, I decide what I dwell on. I decide how I feel.

I am disciplined. I am poised.

Why stop with you? If these things build you up, you can betcha bottom dollar they will build your children up. Insert positive phrases into their head. Tell them what they are, and make them believe.

  Affirmations for your CHILDREN:

You are smart.

You are confident.

You are special.

You are important.

You are unafraid.

You are loved.

You are beautiful.

You are extraordinary.

Give it a try. Build yourself up, and then once you understand the power behind it, build up your children.

The truth is, is that somebody.... ( everybody) is going to do the same thing to your children. They are going to tell your child, who they are, what they are capable of, and where they belong in this world. Some will say it bluntly, others will place it in front of them passively. Either way, ensure that you plant seeds inside their head first-- the right seeds. Seeds, of great, beautiful things.

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A lesson we should teach our children right now.

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5 Things to Do When Your Day Smells Funny and Or, Really Bad.

So you're having a stinky day? I understand. I've been there... I go there quite often actually, and during the challenges, I have learned a few things that help take the stench away. They are, as follows ( clears throat.)

1.) Pretend as if you're some super awesome actor/ actress, playing your role... as you: Did you read that right-- you're wondering? Yes, yes you did. I said it, and I meant it. They say, in a lot of inspirational business books, that work, especially, needs to be viewed as a form of "center stage." You get in there, you put on your "act" and then, when the clock strikes "thank god I'm off" time, you can be you again. Why, I wonder, use this excersise just at work. To me, this helps quite a bit. If you aren't feeling courageous enough to do a task, or patient enough to endure the temperament of the day, just pretend you do. You'll be amazed, at how well you not only can fool the world, but yourself.

2.) Force a smile: Got pulled over? Your car run out of gas, or you rip your pants in the office? What do you do? You smile.. that's what you do. Oh and it's painful, I will warn you, to enforce yourself to plant a smile on your face despite wanting to cry and run away, but it works... absolutely. They say, that when your face carries a smile, it's almost impossible to not feel happy. That's some very strong, serious stuff. Try it out. When life gives you lemons, or a headache... smile about it.

3.) Talk to yourself:  I know this sounds a bit strange, but the power of speaking to yourself is enormous. Sometimes, it's extremely beneficial to calm yourself down merely by conversating with yourself. In Shad Helmstetter's "What to Say When You Talk to Yourself" it makes an obvious point, that we already talk to ourselves, but rather than pump ourselves up, we all have a detrimental habit of speaking negatively, doing nothing more than bringing ourselves down. This has a huge effect on our subconscious. So next time you're feeling down or as though you're about to over react, step away for a while, and give yourself a little pep talk.

4.) Hide: Just go.. hide out somewhere. Hide in your car, hide in your room, hide under your desk... it doesn't matter, just escape. You don't look foolish or weak getting away for a couple minutes. You're merely taking a "time out" to evaluate why your day smells funny. Take a break, and then go at it again.

5.) Read an inspiring book, quote, or magazine: When you're having a tough time, you're lacking positive thoughts. The solution: you plant those suckers right in there! Whether it's a random quote you Google on the internet, or a James Allen book sitting next to your night stand, open it up, and read it. Negative thoughts are like termites, if you do not kill them by spraying positive thoughts on them, they will take over and ultimately destroy you-- leading to your demise. Great analogy huh?

Well folks, those are the first five I'd recommend to anyone having a tough time. A few others are : scream, get in your car and drive for 3 hours, do 100 jump and jacks, watch a Disney film, and cry. We'll touch base on those at a later date. In the meantime, I sincerely hope you take these thoughts along with you as your "Febreeze" to use any time you find your day stinking. Until next time,

Nicole Almond

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A Lesson to be Taught by a Toddler

I remember, not too long ago, hearing a quote similar to "be as a child," or "see like a child." All I know, is that it did not go as "act like a child." Regardless, the quote was of sincerity and wisdom. Immediately, I imagined the world throwing temper tantrums, kicking and screaming along the aisles in the grocery store and walking around with headless Barbie dolls- weird. Of course, at the time my three year old was demonstrating her authority, so anything "child-like" inevitably implanted a bitter taste in my mouth. However, after patiently enduring the "diva-tude," as I like to call it (deep sigh) I showed her mommy's demonstration of authority.

Discipline is a two-sided concept. You pray that you do not portray hippocracy and it hurts a little bit being the bad guy, but it is necessary, and in the end, if you do it appropriately, they'll thank you for it. I placed her in timeout and braced myself for the almighty wrath of "The  Aimslee Grace," and her ever-so-powerful ( and loud) scream. It's amusing almost, how such a rebellious, confident, little being, switches almost immediately into the damsel in distress, locked away by the cold-hearted, wicked mother, pleading, desperately for freedom. (They are not only smarter than most people may believe, but much more tricky and way more clever.)

I asserted my position as the authoritative figure, banging my chest triumphantly, and roaring in pride. I made it evidently clear that I...am... mother; queen of this house. ( Just for the record, and to create an accuracy in your mental image, I have only done this (literally) just once or twice. For the most part, I merely imagine myself acting in this manner.)

So, to sum up how the system in my house goes, ( clears throat)..

-Aimslee gets rebellious, steps a little out of the boundaries of "acceptable behavior,"

-throws a fit after being told no,

-enters time-out ( aka baby prison)...

-mommy turns into bad guy, and then, here's where it gets very interesting. After time out, after the reprimanding and the screaming, Aimslee, right after fleeing the "no no chair" comes over to me, almost every single time, and with tears still clinging to her long, baby-doll eye lashes, she says, with a smile "I love you mommy."

And this part, is where my heart officially, every time, sinks.

I don't remember, exactly how the quote went regarding us adults somehow being compared to children, but I do know that despite how angry Aimslee was with me, and despite how "mean" I may have appeared, Aimslee, every time, forgives me. Children, so young, forgive, flawlessly. So perhaps it is not " see as a child" or "be as a child" but rather, "forgive like a child."

I think there's a lot to be learned by merely watching a child- but forgiving as a child, so freely, so perfectly- well it's a trait all of us adults could benefit from.

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One person may not have the power to change the world at precisely one moment. But one person may instill one thought, one idea, one feeling inside one another's heart, which in turn may ignite one flame which grows into one fire, which then causes their one life to alter in one enormous way. And that one person, may carry on this one idea, this one thought, this one feeling... And implant it into one other's heart, causing yet another one flame-- yet another one fire to change, yet another's life. Seemingly small... Insignificant words and actions, can create not only an enormous affect, but an enormous chain of affects. Never underestimate the power of (one)::. Because ultimately, that's what everything begins with :)

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Shall We Hide The Fairy Tales?

My thought process has been awoken and slightly disturbed with an article I just recently read regarding the detrimental effects of fairy tales and overly predictable Disney films designed for our young children. I assure you, I read the article with an open mind, absorbing all of the criticism and outrage in these films leaving our children with the impression that life is glamorous, full of possibility, limitless, and always ending with a troubled prince and a beautiful princess living happily ever after. Hold on.... These films are being ridiculed because they are opening our children's eyes to possibility? No, certainly not. Let's try again, these films are being ridiculed because they give the impression that life  ends with a happily ever after?

The first thought that comes into my head is "bah humbug," but I hesitated in typing that because then, the second thought immediately to follow is: "I wonder how my family's doing Christmas this year?" But that's besides the point. If bah humbug doesn't reflect the disgust I'm feeling, or if it reminds you of an old man being haunted by ghosts, then feel free to insert your own "disgust" phrase, whatever it may be.

The truth of the matter is, is that these films do not portray ONLY positive instances in life, why that would be utterly unrealistic ( a word I absolutely despise, but feel is appropriate here.) In all of them, there's conflict, and in most, devastating conflict. I think the only negative impression this may leave is the time frame it portrays. I mean come on, the producers have roughly two hours to sum up a story;an adventure. Children may possibly get confused when they enter the real world, only to find that their resolution to the such conflict in their lives may take more than 120 minutes to hit the surface. For the most part, however, it teaches 5 valuable lessons:

1.) Even those with the seemingly most glamorous lifestyles endure conflict and stressful circumstances- You can take two different people, with two very different lives, and both experience an inner conflict that ultimately leads them to an external conflict. Take Ariel and Jasmine for example. From afar, both princesses seem to have everything a little girl could envy. They have royalty, a loving family and friends, but yet both are still unsatisfied and seem untouched by their worldly possessions. This teaches us that happiness does not come from the golds in our pockets, but rather from inside. We cannot truly experience happiness until we follow our passions; our hearts.

2.) Where you begin is not necessarily where you must end- This teaches our children possibility.The best story to reflect this is no other than Cinderella. Dressed in rags and at service to her family, Cinderella, from the outside, seemed only destined for a long life of enslavement. But if you know the story, which you must, Cinderella rises above such miserable torment and becomes of elite status; royalty, all the while maintaining her poise. Dare you tell me that this picture is unrealistic to the real life in which we all have the opportunity to experience. Rags to riches stories are written every second of every day. Possibility- what a fabulous concept to implant into our children.

3.) Looks do not "make" a person- In Beauty and the Beast, Bell falls in love with, what she first proclaims to be " a monster," only to find that his heart, encapsulated in anger and resentment, is at the core, genuinely kind. Bell, the beauty of the story, sees past the hairy flesh of this creature, only to recognize and adore the soul within it.

4.) Stepping out of our comfort zone can lead to marvelous things- Yes, OK, I know what you're thinking. When Jasmine mustered up the courage to jump over the palace walls, she was introduced to an adventure full of adversity and challenge. When Ariel decided to leave her home to seek out the Prince, she fell into a wicked witch's trap and lost her voice. It seems as though, it would have been much better maintaining the mundane, unsatisfied, status both princesses endured. They may have still been "craving" an adventure, but both would have been comfortably safe. Here's the thing, it takes courage, and there's bound to be challenges and trials awaiting your "jump," but fleeing your box, is the only way happily ever afters are created. Both would have never met their "true loves," and both would have never been living their dreams. Cinderella, if she would have told the fairy god mother " eh, that sounds good and all, but the ball is a little outside of my comfort zone," she would have forever been dressed in rags and drenched in misery. Courage, what a valuable lesson.

and last but certainly not least.....

5.) They teach us about life- They teach us that there are people in this world that will bestow horrible behavior upon us, in which we need to watch our backs. They teach us that love is real, valuable, and one of the if not THE most important thing this world has to offer. They teach us that conflict WILL arise, despite our status, but with courage we can face and conquer anything. They teach us hope.They teach us family dynamics. They teach us that a good heart is much more powerful than a cold, wicked one.

And more than anything, they teach us that this life is an adventure and should be viewed precisely as that. That we are our own characters in our own tales, and with courage, we can create the fairy tale we so desire.

  Now if you'll excuse me, I believe my daughter and I are going to go watch some wildly "unrealistic" Disney Fairy tale :)

Nicole Almond

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Time Management for the Overly Ambitious Mommy

Let's face it, taking a chance at your dreams while holding down a household is pretty time consuming, if you do it correctly. Goals take 100% focus. Surely enough, so does your family. So you're forced to dispense your time appropriately- evenly. Ok, so the concept isn't too complex, but actually sitting down and creating a system to do so, well, let's just say, if you execute this perfectly, I owe you a standing ovation. it's difficult, but we as parents know, difficult does not mean impossible.

Time management is by FAR my biggest challenge when it comes to conquering the world, which it seems that's what I'm attempting to do. I have written down a few things that are helping me, thus far. Please feel open to sharing any and all advice you may have regarding "being Superwoman."

1. Write down your work goals AND your personal life goals- It is estimated that only 10% of the population actually commit their goals and dreams to paper. Having an "idea" in your head isn't good enough. Plant that sucker in a notebook, notepad, or even a napkin. Write...it...down. There's something absolutely amazing that happens in your subconscious when you put forth the effort in writing it out. A lot of people ONLY reference what they want out of their business, job, or hobby, but rarely do they write out, or even conjure up what they'd like to achieve in their personal life. Write down both. Create two columns if you have to, but understand that both are important. Success in only one area, is no success.

2. Create a daily routine- Great, now that you know where you want to go, it's time to create a schedule that takes you there. Habits are the key to maintaining your sanity. I'm pretty sure that that's proven somewhere. Start by creating one list. Moms, I said ONE list, and a simplified one at that. Small, seemingly, insignificant actions need to be the focus here. A few things I have on mine are:

             - Read for one hour

             - Spend 15 minutes writing affirmations

             - Spend two hours COMPLETE quality time with my 3 year old         diva,( No cell phone, laptop, etc.)

I'm not taking three hour projects and adding into my daily list of "things I must do," because that's ridiculous. I know myself way too well, and I know I'm way too lazy for anything that huge. Small stuff, go on now, write away. Once you do these things every single day, those "little" things begin to make a HUGE difference. It's elementary my dears, and the power of compound interest.

3.Create the agenda ahead of time- Whether it's the Sunday before the week, or the morning before you take on the day, it doesn't matter. Planning your day before it actually happens is significant, and has helped me personally. No, It has helped me immensely. Add your "to do's"- which are the bigger activities that must be done during the week, alongside your "everyday do's." Space them out. Don't put all of your brainstorm sessions down on one day- you'll get a headache. Also, don't put all of your physical activities down in the same day either- you'll be exhausted. Space them out, write them down, and hang it up somewhere that you'll see it all week ( or in your planner, either or.)

4. Commit yourself- Ok, so you've written down your goals, both work related and personal. You've created a daily habitual routine that you have promised yourself to keep. Now, the one last thing to do... in order to create a more sanity-filled lifestyle, is to stay determined enough, disciplined enough to maintain it. They say a habit takes roughly 30-60 days to develop. That's it ladies... my superwomen- mommies who are about to get control of their completely "whack" schedules. Maintain your rituals for 30 days, and then, although it'll still require attention and discipline, the hill will be more downwards and not so much "up."

These things have helped me -not run away to some isolated island. They have helped me achieve things that I, otherwise, would have never been capable of, and they have successfully balanced my work load.

 I only hope that you give these tips a true, honest, run.

May your life not be so heavily laid upon your shoulders--

<3 Nicole Almond

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Time Out for Parents

Yes, there is such a thing, because I say so. Kids have a time out when they misbehave. I realize that a lot of people consider "jail" as a time- out for adults, but I must believe that there's a median, for my own sanity. We, as parents, no... as people, mess up all too often. It's life. We do completely unfortunate and unbelievable things. Because of this, I'm creating "Parent's Time-Out." Time-out, as defined by the dictionary I googled up, is: a quiet period used especially as a disciplinary measure for children.

 My definition that I'm going to use in defining this parental disciplinary tool,  is simply the first three words of that; a quiet period.

We get stressed out. We scramble to our jobs, to our obligated appointments, and to our soccer games. We are scrambling constantly, and rather than producing yummy cheesy eggs ( scrambled eggs, get it?) we're producing obnoxious headaches and regret. Regret for missing life's most valuable moments simply because we're too busy to take the "time out" of our lives to witness them, to cherish them, to breathe them into our hearts. This is our trouble. This is our problem.. our "no, no.". This is when parental time-out is needed.

  Much like childhood time-out, we must look back on what has led us to the situation we are currently in, and what we must do next time confronted with such an instance. Although we aren't "grounded" for hitting, screaming blood curling screams in the middle of the grocery store, or stealing our friends barbie dolls (well, the majority of us anyways), the concept is the same. We've messed up and we need to concentrate on what has happened, why it happened, and how to fix them in the future.

  So how do you fix your "need to do over" moments? You don't. You can't, because regardless how super fantastic it would be to own a remote, controlling both the past and the future ( rewind, fast forward, pause, and my ideal "mute" button,) it does not exist, (after extensive research, I have come to this conclusion) and we, unfortunately, cannot erase and start over what we have already written into our lives. Like a rebellious child, or any three year old, for that matter, you're learning. You're testing your limits and you're absorbing the reactions to every one of your actions. I cannot stress, how important a little time-out can be, not only to your child, but to you as well. It's a teaching tool in it's self.

    So, the next time you know that you've done wrong, that you've missed something you shouldn't have, said something you regret, or maybe you're just feeling completely unbalanced, stick your nose in the corner and simply allow your mind to go over the current situation you're in. 

You'll be absolutely amazed at how a little time-out, can teach us, even as adults.

  May you all "think about what you have done,"

Nicole <3