Building separatism

lesbian | 35 | croatian

[balkanradfem]

Just for some inspiration / maybe you find something out on yt - title This Homesteading Family of 7 Grows Food on IMPOSSIBLE Land! reminds me of your situation.

I will look this up when I'm in the city! Thanks

[balkanradfem]

Hearing you talk about your stories buying an old house in a small village makes me want to do the same. that was my dream when I was little, having a little house in the forest or a small hill

Do it. Not only I have zero regrets but my fear of homelessnes has vanished, I have a huge yard I can shape to my desires, gorgeous view for whenever I feel bad, forests to explore, barely any people around me, and I feel free! It feels like being returned to my natural habitat.

[balkanradfem]

The 'big tree' issue.

So you might know that when I was planning what I'll have on my property, I planned all the big trees; oaks, chetnuts, willows, linden, I would have a whole park.

I was curious to notice that my whole property had zero big trees; in fact the only 'larger' trees were dried, rotten or felled. This means there is absolutely no shade from the sun in the afternoon! How could someone allow this, I wondered.

I talked to my neighbours, to see what they thought about me planting a nice willow at the front that would quickly grant both of us shade; they freaked out instantly.

'Absolutely not, no big trees, we had one in our yard and had to fell it or it would destroy our house.'

Oh, I realized, these people were old enough to see the full circle of life of trees and understood that all trees would eventually fall and threaten any structures nearby. 'Okay,' I said, 'but what if I put it over there?' I picked a spot decently away from both of our houses. 'Then it's going to tangle into the power lines,' the neighbour pointed out.

My heart fell. There were in fact, multiple power lines right where I was hoping to plant my tree. I wouldn't be allowed to plant anything over 4 meters tall in that entire area. But it was exactly where I needed some shade.

My property is a hill side, and it's set up so that the sun rises behind that hill. Then it scorches the hill the entire afternoon before setting behind a mountain. I wanted a tree at the bottom, so it would defend the bottom area against the worst of the afternoon sun; even garden plants falter during a heat wave if they get no shade whatsoever.

The only far-enough location I could plant a big tree in, is at the top of the hill, but then it would shade the entire property until 1am. And the morning sun is pleasant, not too hot, not too hard on the plants or myself, I don't want it blocked.

Well, the solution then could be to plant the big tree at the edge of the property, but wait, then it becomes a threat to all the neighbours and they're all going to demand I fell it before it grows into a giant.

Doesn't it suck to be an adult? It's not like oaks and chestnuts would grow huge during our lifetimes, the neighbours are all 60+ and wouldn't even see those trees mature. But they've had enough tree trouble to vehemently disagree with a tree that might at some point, be a problem to someone in 100 years. I don't care! If a tree falls on this house 200 years in the future I could not care less. It would give me shade and make my life better. Besides they can put it down before it becomes a problem.

But no, we all have to live based on trauma of these people who had to put one tree down and care about power lines and now I can't cause tree chaos. I can't have beef with the neighbours because they give me drinking water.

So now I don't know what to do. I have chestnut seedlings. They are so ready to go into the ground and it doesn't look like I have a place for them. Despite owning land!

I'd have to call a village meeting and ask everyone where they would all benefit from chestnut trees and if I can put them in someone's forest. This village has no chestnut trees so planting some would be beneficial for the whole community. But I don't feel like dealing with all these people so they can judge me for being a woman and whatnot, this sucks.

Maybe I'll just plant them on my property and wait for complaints.

[balkanradfem]

One thing I had to accept quickly in the new house is bugs. There is, at any moment, going to be a wasp, a stinkbug, a fly, a mosquito, and plenty more stuff, in the room with me, and I have to be chill about it.

All these bugs did was fly at the windows, so I had no concerns. We were all going on about our business. Until a wasp stung me in the arm.

I was trying to push my blinds up at the time, and I didn't know why I got stung, so my feelings were hurt. I let them fly all over my house and they sting me. Ouch.

Next time I was pulling my blinds up, pieces of a wasp nest fell on my windowsill. 'Oh,' I thought, 'those lovely ladies were only trying to warn me their nest is up there! I wasn't paying attention and this was the only way to let me know. It wasn't personal, I was threatening their home!' I put the wasp nest piece outside on the windowsill and thought that was the end of it.

Few days later, two wasps stung me on my way to my well. I once again, failed to notice a big accumulation of wasps on my window. I looked at the nest I put out, but the wasps weren't going in there. They were climbing up my window, disappearing into the blinds and inbetween bricks.

Ok well this is a conflict of interest, I have to move the blinds every day to protect myself from the sun during the day, and air house out during the night. The wasps weren't complaining until just then, so maybe they're not home that often.

I would love to relocate their nest to another part of my property while they're not home, but I can't reach or find that nest. It might be stuck in the blinds or between the bricks. I can't be getting stung every day, I'm not allergic but a lot of bites would cause irritation.

Any solutions? I don't wish to harm the wasps, they're pollinators and welcome on my property. Just not in the blinds that I move and walk by every day.

[pankendev]

there are places in the world today that are experiencing 40°C for the first time in recorded history. of course there's no way to know whether chucking billionaires into volcanos will appease the sun god but i feel we're doing the scientific method a disservice if we don't at least try

[balkanradfem]

I dont know anything about gardening or horticulture but could you build up instead of dig down to help make water catchment areas to help soften the earth and allow you an easier time digging in the siga?

Yeah of course! If gardening in the soil isn't successful the way it is, I'll bring soil from the forest and grow in that :)

[spaceexplorationphotography]

[balkanradfem]

New exciting activities at the house!

Drawing the water from the well for the first time

Dragging wooden beams from the ruins to my shed (I own a fucking shed). That one long beam irritated me so bad.

Trying to fix a wall using diy clay and plaster mix

Fishing out a live lizard from the well and releasing her into the wild

Cooking a lentil soup over the fire on a makeshift stove!

Getting stung by a wasp (not allergic so all is well) and planting my first house garden!

[balkanradfem]

Ok I need a vibe check on the people who sold me the house. They are in persistent contact with me and making me uncomfortable.

Sellers are two people maybe in their 50s or 60s, and their 23yo daughter. The house was in 23yo's name so she was signing the contract.

Both she and her parents told me a lot of uncoordinated lies, such as how they acquired the house (it was inherited, they lied they bought it for an inflated price) what the interest is (23yo claimed they already have a buyer, her father was annoyed they're not getting anywhere with selling it). After I confirmed with her on the phone that I am definitely buying it, for the asking price, she started sending me loads of weird messages on whatsapp.

"I'm gonna give you rides every day, I'll help you find a job, what do you do, I'm very charitable and love giving to others, I gave poor people food and money, I'll give you a kitchen and a stove I don't need them, I could fix you up with a job in my company" "I can make you feel like you have friends here"

I politely refused everything except stove, which I could really use if it's free. After signing the contract and giving them money, this pestering changed tone immediately but hasn't faltered!

"Do you want my father to mow the lawn," "No, thank you for offering" "Fine suit yourself."

"Do you want us to fix the lock?" "No, its too complicated" "Its not complicated at all but fine if you dont want it"

She started being annoyed with me for refusing, and then things turned stalkerish.

"I saw you cleaning are you at the house now?" "I saw you open the windows at night, close them there are snakes"

She's keeping tabs on me but why? I already paid her, the house is mine, I should do whatever I want without reporting it.

Then I told her there's some post for her in the mailbox, and offered to keep it open so she can pick it up. It took her 3 days even though apparently she lives nearby. When she arrived I politely let her into the yard, and warned her not to step on a big bug I was currently taking pictures of. She commented 'Now what have you found in the mail,' and after finding her post, paused to ask me if I knew what kind of bug that was. 'Some kind of scarab, I think,' I said because I read up on similar beetled earlier.

'It's like a scorpio,' she said, 'Look out, its going to bite you!'

I was bewildered, she was talking to me as if I'm a child. I'm 13 years older than her. She kept trying to convince me to fear this harmless bug, even though I practically had my face pressed against it, visibly unafraid. She even laighed as if she managed to spook me? I was petting the bug.

I am confused by all this and would like to know, is this comnon with house sellers? Are they doing this with some end goal in mind, pestering and offering favours and stalking. I know this isn't the 23yo's doing because she never bought or inherited that house, her parents used her name to evade taxes. (Young person acquiring her first property gets tax relief). I'm pretty sure everything she does is orchestrated by parents and she has little to do with it. I think they're telling her what to text me too.

They left the house in a bad state so I don't know if they're trying to look good by offering stuff? But then again, they installed a lock that doesn't work from the inside and the door handle fell apart completely, I can barely use the front door. So in my eyes: liars, manipulators, always doing the least, but also stalkers. I want them to give me that stove then leave me be.

Does anyone have experiences like this? What do you think these people want?

also the bug:

[balkanradfem]

Ok this immediately got worse.

I needed to get to the town very early and since there's no public transport during summer, I elected to wake up at 3am and walk for 3 hours.

The second I got to the town, I get a text.

"Why didn't you ask me to drive you? Why are you walking?"

I freeze and look around. It's 5:30 am. I only ever saw two people, maybe heard one car. Nobody is around or in my line of sight.

"Hey, how do you know I'm walking?" I text back.

"I saw you in the town."

I can't figure out if she was in the only car that passed by, that sounds like a crazy coincidence.

"Well, it's okay to take a walk," I text back trying to hide how insane this is to me.

"Why didn't you come to have coffee instead of being alone?" she asks.

She never invited me to coffee or showed me where she lives.

"I wasn't alone, I was hanging out with neighbours."

"Which neighbours?"

At this point I just text her names bc I only have 4 neighbours in the entire street.

"Ok great then," she texts back.

Leaving me in utter horror that I can't walk on the street at 5am without her finding out and asking me to explain myself!

A few people responding to this post took a "true crime" line of thinking and now I'm starting to see it? She has to know reprimanding someone for seeing them on the street at 5:30am isn't normal. Also someone else reminded me that she has a husband, a child, and a job; you'd think she had other priorities than finding out why I had the nerve to walk around in the early morning.

What the hell.

[balkanradfem]

Ok wait I have a theory. It's might not be extremely ominous.

Remember I said I found some of her post in my mailbox? I had no idea what it was, but one of it was a package, in a yellow envelope. I didn't study it a lot, but I noticed a sticker on it that said 'avon'.

I happen to know that avon is a MLM company, and while it might be something completely else, there is a chance that she did get a packet from a MLM, which would make her a MLM representative. Which in this context means that I, as a new person in town I would be a perfect target to try and recruit.

Maybe she wanted to give me favours so that when she pitches avon to me, I already owe her so much, or even worse outright rely on her, it would be rude of me to say no. And if you watch any MLM horror stories, you know that recruiters for MLMs throw all common sense out of the window and act in bizzare, disturbing and horrifying ways, so her stalking me and trying to force contact wouldn't be anything out of the ordinary.

If you're reading this and don't know what a MLM is, its a multi-level-marketing company that is basically a pyramid scheme that leeches money out of its own representatives and pays them to recruit more people to leech from. It makes people act wack and forcefully trying to recruit even when it's socially innapropriate or bizzare.

Avon on her post might have meant something else though, but I'd be calmed down by this explanation. You couldn't pay me to join a MLM so she's wasting her effort. I know too much.

[balkanradfem]

The soil issue

So I mentioned my house was on a hill-type terrain; as soon as I saw that, I had one singular thought in my mind. Terrace gardens. With a lake above for irrigation. Lake below for overflow. I need that. I don't care how much work it takes.

I kept checking the position of the sun every day multiple times, in order to figure out which areas get exposure. The hills were getting sunlight from 8am to the evening, facing west. I found this acceptable and proceeded to tell my plan to the neighbours, who watched me with a blank face, having never heard of this.

I noticed that the soil is not just very dry, but the type of plants that naturally grew on it were drought resistant. Yarrow, chicory, thistle. This suggested that maybe the soil doesn't get very wet, and doesn't retain water well. I would learn more about this soon!

There's a grassy plane on the other side of the road, with a hill-side forest in the background. I went to check it out, and as soon as I stepped into it, I was standing in water. The entire area is a giant swamp.

Then it dawned on me that the soil here doesn't retain water at all. Rain runs down the hills from both sides and into the plane, and then just stays there. That leaves the rest of the soil dry and unworkable. Worried, I talked about this to the neighbours and they confirmed the type of soil underneath the topsoil is called "siga" in croatian, and it's like rock, impossible to get through and not letting any water in. However they reassured me that the land is fertile anyway. The top soil is great.

The neighbours have some elevated land in the swampy area and they simply planted their garden over there, forever irrigated by the everlasting swamp. Wish I could do that!

Since I will no longer have access to my original garden, I wanted to plant something, anything that would provide any food for the summer. I knew it was late to do it, but the bigger problem was that the land was so dry I couldn't dig a hole anywhere. Even when I looked under the grass, it was all dry and hard as a rock.

The only area that might be different was under a big rubble, that the last owners left in the middle of the front yard. They took down a barn and left a huge pile of bricks, boards, beams and roof tiles.

It wasn't a priority to clear out the giant rubble, I was only supposed to clean the house. But I wanted to make an attempt at a garden. So I spent every morning dragging big wooden beams into my woodshed (I have a shed!) in order to check if I could find fertile ground below.

If you're wondering why would the soil under a ginat wood rubble be different - it's because it's been protected from the sun. It had no chance to dry out like the rest of the land. Wet wood would keep it damp through summer. Soil getting no light also meant no plants were able to grow there, so there's nothing to clear out, no nutrients drawn out. Being covered with wood means every time it rained and the wood rotted into the soil, it released new nutrients and fertilized the soil. Leaving a bunch of wood on the ground is a great thing for gardening!

l have exhausted myself more than I can describe dragging wooden beams, almost got injured because all the beams have nails sticking out (i stepped on one but only got scratched) and on my fifth day, finally removed enough to have access to some workable soil.

And it was beautiful.

Black, soft, damp, workable with my little spoon. I eagerly dug 8 holes out; I found out you hit "siga" very fast when digging. Few centimeters of topsoil, then rocks. It would be horrid to dig out a lake. But I won't give up.

I used two holes for tomato seeds, one for beans, and all the rest is squash. I think squash grows the fastest and could provide me with most amount of food. I've never direct-sown tomatoes before, no idea if that even works. But it's good to try!

Neighbours think there's no chance it would work. But I watered it a lot, then dragged a bunch of hay on top, and watered the hay too. This will create a lingering dampness on the top of the soil, resistant to glaring sun and the heat. Summer crops love to germinate quickly in the heat, and the sun will definitely provide that. If I can keep them wet, it could happen quickly. And I have a well and I'm smart. Fingers crossed for my first house garden.

And one more thing I heard from the neighbours. There are no slugs here.

[balkanradfem]

Photos of the abandoned house!

Don't worry, I removed all symbols of christianity right away, I have standards.

[balkanradfem]

Jesus anon again except I want to be Mary 🥀 anon instead. I don’t know him like I do Her.

Hennyway, if I lived even a few countries from yours, I’d totally join you in building up your home. I used to work in construction, wilderness clearing. It sounds like so much fun, I love physical work and beautiful nature.

I have another suggestion. Build up your supply of home remedies for ailments. Tinctures, tonics, dried herbs, etc. As well as vapor rub, ointments, basic medical supplies.

You’re probably already well aware of what you need to take care of yourself and I’m being a bit superfluous. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I am rooting for you. Stay strong.

Okay you are henceforth known as Mary anon!

You used to do such cool stuff, I love that! Thank you for wishing to help, it's so sweet.

You are not superflous, I don't really have the resources to make anything more than a tincture, and I haven't made any yet because I don't know what would I use it for? I use medicinal teas a lot. I have one anti-itching ointment I use a lot, and elderberry syrup is my solution for the rest. I am intending to make a peppermint tincture for stomach issues, and I have teas for stomach pain, headaches, and digestive issues. Until I'm actually sick with something else, I'm unsure what to make?

I sometimes do learn about other healing plants and its like 'this one is for knee pain' and I'm like, my knee is fine. And these don't last forever so I don't feel like I need to make one now.

Also, no clue what vapour rub is, I'll go look that up. Thank you for all the information and advice! I appreciate it.

[balkanradfem]

Jesus post anon: about the Lady Mary worship. It’s usually in Catholic cultures, I’ve seen it most from Latin American Catholics but I heard it of East European Catholics as well.

It’s just a little extra admiration, reverence, and familiarity with Mary as a holy woman figure and mother of Jesus, per the colonial missionary teachings. In Mexico, she appeared in a vision to an indigenous man whose story was shared nationally. Women and girls relate to her and pray to her, men and boys feel comfortable to pray to her, too. Especially for their female relatives.

Some xtians, often white us american, see this as idolatry lol. Any focus off of Jesus and especially praying to anyone not named as gd or Jesus gets them offended. But they’ll also pray to male saints and angels so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. “Their heathen idolatry, our righteous reverence—“ type of rules for thee but not for mee!

But that’s all old news. You’ve got new and exciting stuff going on. About your concerns with Your House’s sellers: maybe they’re being socially shamed for selling a dilapidated house to a lone young woman.

It sounds like you’re getting on well with your neighbors and their help. Maybe they see the sellers in a poorer light after meeting you and seeing how hard you have to work to make Your House work. If they know the price range you paid, maybe they see it as the sellers taking advantage of a desperate person with low means and charging more than the house is worth.

Perhaps you could have haggled the price down for the state of the house and the work you’d have to put in.

It is weird that the daughter messaged you so early in the morning to admit she knew your whereabouts. I think it’s more likely that it’s a small town and someone who saw you called her or her parents. It’s likely out of concern for you but also wariness.

Everything is still very recent. Neighbors and other townspeople may be wondering what kind of young woman buys such a home all alone and with little other means. That can be resolved with time to get to know you.

But I think you are correct in declining to be so familiar with the sellers and declining situations to be alone with them. Honestly, I just read your latest posts and I immediately thought: You’re going to be trafficked. 😬

She could have taken you anywhere in her car. Coffee and Your House, or a secondary location to hand you off to suspicious persons.

When I got to the weird locks explanation, that was a bigger and deeper red flag. The sellers or anyone who can access a copy of the key from the sellers, can access Your House. Most people moving in get locks changed. You can’t for the time being…

I have a couple suggestions. Acquire bells or chimes that can alert to movement in key areas like doors. Also, a box of broken glass/noise makers near the front and back doors for unaware intruders to alert on themselves. You can move it as you please morning and night.

Be careful, have defense and protection measures.

Also, about the worms. That is so weird! I’m thinking it’s either from a creature that brought its food inside and didn’t return for it, or a person who did that for whatever amusement they got.

I also recommend asking your neighbors questions on the sellers, like if the behavior you experienced is normal of them. Also ask if anyone, such as groups of kids or drifters, ever hung around the house before you got it and after.

Your neighbors are a great resource of info for you, and on you. Good luck, have heart and take care.

Mary worship is definitely more interesting! I only relate to her in the way that m*n wanted to impregnate her and she was socially obligated to allow this, but it's presented as her choice. I also heard that all of her statues look like a vulva so she represents female pleasure; we never hear about her pleasure though! Where are her orgasms. The statues do look very vulva like.

I don't know where exactly the sellers live, it's presumed to be close, but the neighbours seem to have a positive opinion of them. I told the neighbours the price of the house, thinking they'll agree with me it's too expensive, but neighbours thought it was a fair price. They told me I made a mistake in not asking them to clear the giant rubble first, but I'm okay with cleaning it myself because it provides free building materials.

I tried to haggle for it so bad but the sellers would not only get upset, but start yelling the house belongs to anyone who can cover the full price first. They absolutely refused to haggle, even though it's customary, and demanded full asking price. I eventually caved.

The neighbours have also worked hard all their life and seeing me struggle is very normal to them; they're reminding me to do extra stuff even. They're not very mobile anymore so seeing me run around must not feel that good, I bet they wish they were physically able to do that much.

The lock thing is weird, but also there's something I didn't tell them - the door handle falls apart if you pull on it even a little. So if they try to enter the house, I will know. The handle will be on the ground. I do think I'll have to change the lock somehow eventually. When I was buying the house, they offered to change the lock in front of me, which I thought was weird.

I haven't thought of trafficking! But I wouldn't enter someone's car, don't worry. The chimes and noise-makers are a cool idea! I feel like the wind would trigger them too tho, I need something that activates if you step on it or move past it.

I don't think we're in the times where seeing a woman in the town at 5:30 is a cause for concern, I saw two other women there heading to work. It's difficult to imagine someone going 'Oh a woman is out there, better report that', because it's normal.

I also found all neighbours and residents here incredibly nice and welcoming. There's so little people here they're all shocked to see a living person! Whenever I stumbled into anyone, there was a half hour chat, with them looking so excited to have someone to talk to. They all think the village is too deserted and long for company. So everyone else is giving me warm and welcoming vibes except for the owners, who are being a mess.

Oh and you're right about the worms! If it was just some food they were eating, there wouldn't be a skeleton. Thank you!

[balkanradfem]

Ok I need a vibe check on the people who sold me the house. They are in persistent contact with me and making me uncomfortable.

Sellers are two people maybe in their 50s or 60s, and their 23yo daughter. The house was in 23yo's name so she was signing the contract.

Both she and her parents told me a lot of uncoordinated lies, such as how they acquired the house (it was inherited, they lied they bought it for an inflated price) what the interest is (23yo claimed they already have a buyer, her father was annoyed they're not getting anywhere with selling it). After I confirmed with her on the phone that I am definitely buying it, for the asking price, she started sending me loads of weird messages on whatsapp.

"I'm gonna give you rides every day, I'll help you find a job, what do you do, I'm very charitable and love giving to others, I gave poor people food and money, I'll give you a kitchen and a stove I don't need them, I could fix you up with a job in my company" "I can make you feel like you have friends here"

I politely refused everything except stove, which I could really use if it's free. After signing the contract and giving them money, this pestering changed tone immediately but hasn't faltered!

"Do you want my father to mow the lawn," "No, thank you for offering" "Fine suit yourself."

"Do you want us to fix the lock?" "No, its too complicated" "Its not complicated at all but fine if you dont want it"

She started being annoyed with me for refusing, and then things turned stalkerish.

"I saw you cleaning are you at the house now?" "I saw you open the windows at night, close them there are snakes"

She's keeping tabs on me but why? I already paid her, the house is mine, I should do whatever I want without reporting it.

Then I told her there's some post for her in the mailbox, and offered to keep it open so she can pick it up. It took her 3 days even though apparently she lives nearby. When she arrived I politely let her into the yard, and warned her not to step on a big bug I was currently taking pictures of. She commented 'Now what have you found in the mail,' and after finding her post, paused to ask me if I knew what kind of bug that was. 'Some kind of scarab, I think,' I said because I read up on similar beetled earlier.

'It's like a scorpio,' she said, 'Look out, its going to bite you!'

I was bewildered, she was talking to me as if I'm a child. I'm 13 years older than her. She kept trying to convince me to fear this harmless bug, even though I practically had my face pressed against it, visibly unafraid. She even laighed as if she managed to spook me? I was petting the bug.

I am confused by all this and would like to know, is this comnon with house sellers? Are they doing this with some end goal in mind, pestering and offering favours and stalking. I know this isn't the 23yo's doing because she never bought or inherited that house, her parents used her name to evade taxes. (Young person acquiring her first property gets tax relief). I'm pretty sure everything she does is orchestrated by parents and she has little to do with it. I think they're telling her what to text me too.

They left the house in a bad state so I don't know if they're trying to look good by offering stuff? But then again, they installed a lock that doesn't work from the inside and the door handle fell apart completely, I can barely use the front door. So in my eyes: liars, manipulators, always doing the least, but also stalkers. I want them to give me that stove then leave me be.

Does anyone have experiences like this? What do you think these people want?

also the bug:

[balkanradfem]

Ok this immediately got worse.

I needed to get to the town very early and since there's no public transport during summer, I elected to wake up at 3am and walk for 3 hours.

The second I got to the town, I get a text.

"Why didn't you ask me to drive you? Why are you walking?"

I freeze and look around. It's 5:30 am. I only ever saw two people, maybe heard one car. Nobody is around or in my line of sight.

"Hey, how do you know I'm walking?" I text back.

"I saw you in the town."

I can't figure out if she was in the only car that passed by, that sounds like a crazy coincidence.

"Well, it's okay to take a walk," I text back trying to hide how insane this is to me.

"Why didn't you come to have coffee instead of being alone?" she asks.

She never invited me to coffee or showed me where she lives.

"I wasn't alone, I was hanging out with neighbours."

"Which neighbours?"

At this point I just text her names bc I only have 4 neighbours in the entire street.

"Ok great then," she texts back.

Leaving me in utter horror that I can't walk on the street at 5am without her finding out and asking me to explain myself!

A few people responding to this post took a "true crime" line of thinking and now I'm starting to see it? She has to know reprimanding someone for seeing them on the street at 5:30am isn't normal. Also someone else reminded me that she has a husband, a child, and a job; you'd think she had other priorities than finding out why I had the nerve to walk around in the early morning.

What the hell.

[balkanradfem]

The failures and hacks

On my second day in the abandoned house, I wanted to try fixing the wall. It was missing plaster in the room I slept in.

I wasn't going to go and buy plaster, or buy plaster ingredients; those are toxic to the environment and I'm not here to poison the place. Instead I thought, cob plaster should work. I would need clay, sand and straw. I was able to find clay in the fields, but absolutely no sand or straw.

While cleaning up the broken pieces of old mortar and plaster, some of it crumbled into fine powder. So I thought, well what is the difference between this and sand. Ok, sand is organic and healthy and great. But this powder was in the walls anyway so I can just reuse and recycle it, there's no other use for it anyway.

So I'm next to my hole in the wall plaster, with a bucket of water, clay, and powdered plaster. I mix it and start sploshing it into wall. It... did not go well.

I learned that if I had first cleared the powder off the bricks, it would adhere better. I also should have wet the bricks first. And my mixture was too dry. Trying to wet it afterwards created a wall horribly dirty with muddy water running down it. I did manage to clean it somehow.

I left it to dry though and few days later, it seems to be stuck to the wall pretty firmly. We will ignore that it isn't even and looks like a child messed up the wall. The wall is less hole-y. I'll take it. I've never done this before and I watched 2 youtube videos that told me to do things radically different than I did. It's okay.

I'm not sure if this is what I'm gonna do to all walls? There's a lot to fill in and I wonder if you can just pain clay with wall paint without making it all muddy. Or I just have mud walls and enjoy the dirt.

Another thing I needed to try was boiling water outside. I have no kitchen so it's back to primitive measures. I have this big horizontal pot which in theory, should boil water quickly. I arranged bricks to create a makeshift stove to contain the fire and gathered sticks I assumed would be enough to do the job. The fire lit easily, but the troubles started instantly.

Black bubbles appeared on my pot, making me think it's about to melt. It shouldn't, I made sure it was a fire safe material. I took it off fire in panic, but then saw it was just turning black, not melting. So I put it back.

The fire got out of control immediately, flames getting high in the air around the pot, smoking the water. I didn't want my water to taste like smoke. But even with the intensity, the water wasn't boiling. To top it all off, because of all the tall grass that surrounded me, bugs started falling into the pot.

I gave up then. Smokey bug-infested water wouldn't be appealing. I wouldn't drink that. I'd have to keep getting water from neighbours.

I would later use this knowledge to do better, but at the moment I just had to deal with the fact that I don't know how to do this right. I had experience roasting chestnuts on open fire, in a less dangerous environment (grass here could catch on fire). I don't know how to boil water on a fire well.

Few days later, I set out to make a lentil soup. I cut out all the grass close to my makeshift stove, made sure no bugs were aiming in. I prepared a lot more sticks and wood pieces and added them in very slowly, ocassionally ressurecting the fire if it died. I made sure to control how much oxygen the fire got in order to slow it down and it never got out of control. It was the tiniest fire.

And it worked. Lentil soup made on fire was so delicious it was actually ridiculous. I tried it and went "there's no way. what the hell". Best I ever tasted. I only put salt, a garlic clove, one potato and lentils in, no spices or oil. The smoke added so much flavour there was no other effort needed.

It is not fair that a method bad for the environment creates food so delicious. I also can't think of any other way to eat right now, I'll try making a solar oven later.

Every time I failed, felt bad for not knowing how to do something or got overly exhausted and miserable, I'd go and explore one of the forests I'm surrounded with. There I would experience otherworldy beauty and immediately forget whatever I was upset about. That felt like a crazy hack to pull.

I also feel like I was made for this. I already forgot whatever I was doing in the city. I feel like I haven't lived until now. I spent half an hour watching 2 giant stag beetles fight in the forest the other day. It's like I don't have to be upset anymore, or take anything hard because there's endless forests I haven't seen yet. And they're all 3 minutes away?

The thrill of new forest views might run out in a few months or years but for now I am being endlessly satisfied.

[balkanradfem]

Ok I need a vibe check on the people who sold me the house. They are in persistent contact with me and making me uncomfortable.

Sellers are two people maybe in their 50s or 60s, and their 23yo daughter. The house was in 23yo's name so she was signing the contract.

Both she and her parents told me a lot of uncoordinated lies, such as how they acquired the house (it was inherited, they lied they bought it for an inflated price) what the interest is (23yo claimed they already have a buyer, her father was annoyed they're not getting anywhere with selling it). After I confirmed with her on the phone that I am definitely buying it, for the asking price, she started sending me loads of weird messages on whatsapp.

"I'm gonna give you rides every day, I'll help you find a job, what do you do, I'm very charitable and love giving to others, I gave poor people food and money, I'll give you a kitchen and a stove I don't need them, I could fix you up with a job in my company" "I can make you feel like you have friends here"

I politely refused everything except stove, which I could really use if it's free. After signing the contract and giving them money, this pestering changed tone immediately but hasn't faltered!

"Do you want my father to mow the lawn," "No, thank you for offering" "Fine suit yourself."

"Do you want us to fix the lock?" "No, its too complicated" "Its not complicated at all but fine if you dont want it"

She started being annoyed with me for refusing, and then things turned stalkerish.

"I saw you cleaning are you at the house now?" "I saw you open the windows at night, close them there are snakes"

She's keeping tabs on me but why? I already paid her, the house is mine, I should do whatever I want without reporting it.

Then I told her there's some post for her in the mailbox, and offered to keep it open so she can pick it up. It took her 3 days even though apparently she lives nearby. When she arrived I politely let her into the yard, and warned her not to step on a big bug I was currently taking pictures of. She commented 'Now what have you found in the mail,' and after finding her post, paused to ask me if I knew what kind of bug that was. 'Some kind of scarab, I think,' I said because I read up on similar beetled earlier.

'It's like a scorpio,' she said, 'Look out, its going to bite you!'

I was bewildered, she was talking to me as if I'm a child. I'm 13 years older than her. She kept trying to convince me to fear this harmless bug, even though I practically had my face pressed against it, visibly unafraid. She even laighed as if she managed to spook me? I was petting the bug.

I am confused by all this and would like to know, is this comnon with house sellers? Are they doing this with some end goal in mind, pestering and offering favours and stalking. I know this isn't the 23yo's doing because she never bought or inherited that house, her parents used her name to evade taxes. (Young person acquiring her first property gets tax relief). I'm pretty sure everything she does is orchestrated by parents and she has little to do with it. I think they're telling her what to text me too.

They left the house in a bad state so I don't know if they're trying to look good by offering stuff? But then again, they installed a lock that doesn't work from the inside and the door handle fell apart completely, I can barely use the front door. So in my eyes: liars, manipulators, always doing the least, but also stalkers. I want them to give me that stove then leave me be.

Does anyone have experiences like this? What do you think these people want?

also the bug:

[balkanradfem]

going to visit croatia in the summer with my partner. if you still need help i’d be happy to drop by and do some work for you there. i’m physically strong, know about plumbing, building, and wiring and my partner will prob be shopping so it would be a welcome respite. do you mind sharing what part of the country you’re in? i can also message you via DMs if you’d like (doing anon now because i’m at work and not logged into my nonfootball blog lol)

nonfootball blog.... I mean, dm me!

Tbh I wouldn't let ppl do most of this work because it's dangerous and if someone got hurt I would wither in guilt. But absolutely visit me so we can chat and have fun together! I wanna know what you think about the new wall plaster I have put together from stuff I found on the ground.

In the street where I live there are 3 more people so we can do anything here. I made so many loud noises yesterday and nobody even heard! (i was moving the furniture).