once you say it out loud it can’t be undone {Corpse Husband/Fem!Reader}
Summary: Non-Fatal Hanahaki AU. Feelings are fair game for nine months out of the year, but God forbid you develop a crush during Hanahaki Season; three months of coughing up petals just because you’re in love with someone who doesn’t love you back? It’s a damn inconvenience. You haven’t had an active Hanahaki Season in the four years since you started YouTube, and you think that since you’re in quarantine, not going outside, not meeting new people, you’ll be fine this year too! Except that you start playing Among Us with a group of people you’ve never met before, friends of friends, including the elusive Corpse Husband, who’s kind, and funny, and may be flirting with you, but you’re not quite sure. The point is, you make friends with him not expecting much beyond a streaming buddy, but then you get talking more often, chatting and joking at all hours in DMs, and he’s calling you sweet nicknames on stream, and you wake up on the first day of your Season coughing up flower petals and cursing yourself for falling for a man who’s first name you don’t even know!
A/N: 17,511 words. hello i wrote and ~mildly~ edited this in 24 hours because my adhd said ‘u will write a terrifying amount of words about corpse’ and i said ‘YES SIR, RIGHT AWAY’. anyways, hi, i don’t write a lot for the YouTube fandom anymore because rpf is a trick grey area, but unfortunately i don’t control the hyperfixation and the boy’s sweet personality + his edgy aesthetic hit all of my buttons. this has GRATUITOUS pop culture references, and if you don’t know what Stardew Valley is, it’s essentially a farm simulator but you also make friends with the NPCs in the nearby village. lots of different youtubers are mentioned, but Ethan (Crankgameplays / Eef) and Sean (Jacksepticeye / Spedicy), and I guess Charlie (Cr1tikal / Greaseball) and Mark (Markiplier) are the other more heavily featured folks. god there’s so many words. You’ll have to excuse me for not knowing the others too well, I’m embarrassed to admit that I only really watch Ze and Corpse often in terms of Among Us streams. ANYWAYS, please let me know what you think, I hope you like it! if this ever gets to corpse himself im going to delete this entire blog, just as a warning. no backups. yeet.
Warnings: SFW, but there is a scene near the end that gets a bit hot and heavy, but only a bit. very light mentions of sexual and kink activity but nothing explicit. Swearing. Mentions of illness, of coughing/throwing up flower petals, and foreign objects in the mouth and windpipe, but there is no risk posed beyond an inconvenience, just thought i should warn you.
Taglist: @slashersdream @divine-artemis @realmejay @lovemelikepercy @balla-deer @miniritzcrackers @loraleiix @ppopty @easygoingtheatre @insanedeathwish @siriuslystupid @losvertown @janiathecat @wineandionysus @moonlightsimp @allylyew @chokingonflxwers @sicnesa @xxniksxx @mishisamess @preciousskye @yashinosakura @meleekabenjamin @whatamievendoinghere01 @lxurxn-02 @liljennyx3 @the-fusionist @benjaminka
Hanahaki Season was different for everyone. No-one’s quite sure what evolutionary advantage there is to coughing up flowers for three months out of the year as the body’s way of dealing with perceived unrequited feelings, but, much to the entire world’s collective irritation, it was what it was. It begins for everyone when their first romantic feelings arise and aren’t reciprocated. That could be as early as kindergarten, wanting to hold hands with one of the kids in your class more than any other person, but watching them share their launchable with someone else, though middle school is most commonly where those feelings become strong enough to actually activate the bloom. Some people on the aromantic spectrum don’t activate it until their late teens, or college, or even later, and even then they may only experience it once or twice, since the situation in which they find themselves developing romantic feelings like that doesn’t occur often, or doesn’t occur during their Season. You’re kind of jealous of aromantic people who have never had to deal with it.
Hanahaki Season lasts for three months, starting every year on the same date; the date you’d first ever had romantic feelings strong enough to start hacking up flower petals. You’re free to catch feelings for the other nine months without consequences, but watch out if you catch feelings around your Season, because your house tends to look like the opening of Ouran High School Host Club. The amount of flowers really varies depending on your feelings; you’d spent days putting professional florists to shame in the month leading up to your senior prom when you realized you had feelings for your best friend, right up until they asked you to go with them, and the petals had been gone the next day, but your smile hadn’t been.
Your body doesn’t care if they have feelings for you, all it knows is that you think they don’t, despite the feelings you absolutely, definitely have; it needs either a confirmation, or for you to get over it.
You and your high school best friend had dated for about six months after prom, but decided that you were better off as friends, and thankfully, in the years since you’d started college, your Seasons had been a non-event; no romantic feelings, so nothing to worry about. It’s not that you didn’t go out, or didn’t date, it’s just that there was nothing serious enough to warrant an active Season when it actually came up.
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