contaminated by the spiral

Eve | INTP | queer | I'm here for fun things, cry-laughing and cute animals. I am totally harmless.

[ur-favorite-fishgirl]

sex is a distraction from your true purpose in life which is to go to the aquarium and look at the fish and go "wooooooaaah.... fishies". cmon guys we all need to lock in.

[mattpresents]

How do you know you're not Asexual? Maybe you just haven't met the right nobody.

[aroaceenjolras]

This "allosexuality" thing is just a phase. You just need to have really bad sex, and then maybe you'll change your mind.

[sparklebog]

Didn't realize they made emergency thermal blankets for babies

[sparklebog]

It's scary to think about babies in an emergency but I guess it's a crazy world out there

Emergency baby

[fuckblast]

[Francisco de Goya]

[probuccalfat]

one time i told a group of lesbian and bi women that i have never watched wicked and they were shocked, gagged, gooped, “but you’re queer. you like pussy. how have you not seen wicked?” yeah. well. i like pussy, not musicals?

[probuccalfat]

i’m this exact post. all this just to fuck women.

[probuccalfat]

“are you going to the lucy dacus concert?” no. i listen to gucci mane.

[veil-of-exordia]

[boybeetles]

Sie transvestigaten meinen ikea hotdog…

[fatsexybitch]

🔪 knife stop 🔪

Take a knife or two to complete any tasks you need to finish soon. Reblog to give your mutuals a knife for any group projects you may be working on

[oysters-aint-for-me]

please do yourself a favor & watch this rock climbing–themed drag king/burlesque performance set to “roxanne” by the police with all the lyrics but “rox” edited out

via @edithwigglesandgiggles on instagram

[kindlyanni]

Happy Aromantic Awareness Week!

This week my comic zine I Think I'm good by Myself, Actually is part of an Itch bundle full of books, comics, visual novels and audio books featuring aromantic characters! Please check it out:

LINK TO THE BUNDLE!

[peoplegettingreallymadatghosts]

Brutal scenes playing out in real time

[kamari3]

[bigcheeseofficial]

[that-stone-butch]

personalized ads are so funny to me

'hey we've been spying on you and tracking your every move. it's a culmination of state of the art technology and an unprecedented invasion of consumer privacy. a room full of men with made up jobs bent their will toward decades of constructing this system, defending it in court, and tirelessly innovating new ways to aggregate more data about you'

and the end result is

'yeah so uh we saw that you recently bought a car. so here's an ad for that car'

like no i'm good actually. you might be aware that i already have one

[elfwreck]

[mangoeater1000-deactivated20201]

please support this interracial french gay couple and their 20 kids

[captain-acab]

“le couple homosexuel interracial français milieu a vingt enfants” en fait c’est une erreur statistique. georgs d'enfants, qui habite dans une cave et adopte dix mille enfants chaque jour, est une donnée aberrante et il faudrait pas l’avoir compté

[anarqueer]

I don’t even speak French and I know what that paragraph says

[transboysgetknives]

“georgs d'enfants” how does it feel to be the funniest person here

[flagversion]

this is the funniest thing i’ve ever read in my entire life

[lliveonthesunn]

[emptyjunior]

If I was Denethor the second, Steward of Gondor I would not have sent my son to a council meeting to try and get a cursed ring- I would have sent both my sons out to Seduce Aragorn by any means necessary.

If I wanted the crown of Gondor and to secure leadership for my family for all time I would have said boys. Get out there. Make it happen. Fluff your beautiful shiny hair up. Make papa proud

[wisheduponastar]

you cannot just leave this in the tags @greatmolassesflood

[baggebythesea]

"Boromir, impress him with your manly charm and sexual charisma. Faramir, some guys are into pathetic wet sacks, I guess."

[visual-infinity]

rhmsuwaidi

Cut from a single sheet of paper 🐙⁣ Kirie is a unique style of Japanese paper-cutting art that @kiriesousakukamasayo is an absolute master at! ⁣

[dogpuppy]

[longnuts]

Whore

[softstraydog]

not buying the product isn't enough I need the company to know their advertising made me want to kill them with a golf club.