Dick Grayson, y'all.
Bruce's #1 security risk
Fai_Ryy
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noise dept.
One Nice Bug Per Day

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YOU ARE THE REASON
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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@bard-llama
Dick Grayson, y'all.
Bruce's #1 security risk
DC/Marvel comic books are unlike any other form of media. Imagine a long-form collaboration by thousands of people spanning nearly a century, always fluid and changing and evolving, shepherding and stewarding corporate IP properties they will never own.
Sometimes, it creates a wondrous mythos. But mostly, it’s like a decades-long argument scribbled on the wall of a dilapidated bathroom stall.
Dick got called pretty again.
Detective Comics #1111
hold up
I truly believe Bruce is great at comforting people, and y'all will not change my mind. I keep reading fics where they say he doesn't know what to say or to do, that Dick, the other kids or ALFRED (you must be joking) are better than him. But, especially if we are talking about someone suffering from grief, he is very good at comforting people, even children. Especially children even!
Idk, people often explain their opinion with "he only knows his own experience with grief", but actually, his experience is why he is so good. Nobody was there for him the way he needed (Alfred being one of the people to fail him), and he does want to help children so they aren't failed like him, he knows how they feel and so he can help them!
In some comics, he is even seen by others as this specialist of grief, so they go to him to open up about their feelings and get comfort. It's the case of Mr Terrific, Michael Holt, who had never talked to anyone about his late wife, but he went to Batman to open up. Because he knew that, even tho Batman never lost a spouse, he knows enough about grief and pain to understand him in a way noone else will.
And Bruce being great at comforting others is another reason why Dick is insane about him. Because, from the moment they met, Bruce understood him and his pain better than anyone, even tho they were strangers. And he gave Dick everything he wished he had when he went through the same things.
The robins (can you tell which is which?)
Gotham drinking water is so corrosive you cannot drink it.
Gothamites that don't care, and drink it anyway. But only born and raised ones, because it's all they've ever had. Transfers can't handle it.
Bruce, Tim, Steph, and Duke filling up their glass, while the others glare at them and go to get a bottle from the fridge.
What is the point of this, I hear you ask?
After the Lazarus Pit Jason can't drink Gotham water anymore. He's more mad about that than the Joker.
hi i saw a fic which premise was tim being cursed to be silent and no one noticed but I would like to apply to bruce?
I just prefer bruce angst
so completely up to u no pressure i saw u have a lot going on w schl which i hope all goes well, so pleas ignore below if need be
so he's cursed maybe on a mission with JL and they don't notice because they often talk over him/ ignored him/ tell him to shut up (drawing on older posts w bad JL??)
and kids have drifted, just distanced, some miscommunication maybe? but I dont think malicious...
i'm not sure if this making sense but overall no one notices, i'm not sure what happened to alfred
absolutely no pressure or rush, just if this is something you could formulate better than me
@thebatmog no. 9 love
BREAKING NEWS: BILLIONAIRE BRUCIE WAYNE CURSED
Dick squints at his television. "What the hell kind of publicity stunt," he mutters, reaching for the remote.
Tim leans over his shoulder as he increases the volume, and snorts. "This should be good."
"Last night, billionaire Bruce Wayne arrived at his Martha Wayne Foundation fundraiser, the event of the year, and guests quickly realised something was wrong when the playboy was not his usual chatty self."
Dick frowns at the footage of Bruce at the top of the red carpet, silently waving from the top of the red carpet. Usually he'd be calling flirty jests back to the press hounds, but this time he just disappears inside with a wave and a blown kiss.
"According to sources inside the gala, Wayne also did not interact with his guests, and when came time for the host's speech, it was read out by an intermediary stood astride Mr Wayne."
"Way to tank donations this year." Tim leaps the couch, settling in beside Dick, and he lifts an arm to let his little brother settle against him.
"Yeah," he murmurs in agreement, brow furrowed.
"This morning we have Mr Wayne here in the studio with us to explain his actions, and give credence to the rumours spinning around in the wake of last night's gala! Mr Wayne!" The camera pans around, and Dick raises his brow, seeing Bruce and another man sat on the adjoining couch. "How are we this morning, Mr Wayne?"
Brucie offers a glittering smile, and raises his hands, quickly slipping into sign language. His interpreter flirts with the host on his behalf, and small talk slips by unnoticed as Dick scrutinises the screen.
"No obvious injury to the head or jaw," Tim murmurs, and Dick nods.
"So why the hell isn't he talking?"
"—crossed the wrong side of a witch," the interpreter reports drolly. "I was hexed to be unable to speak, and have been this way since."
"Fascinating," the host gasps. She pokes for details, looking for a scandalous seed to the story, the reason behind the hex, while Bruce laughs off all attempts, deflecting her probes with ease.
"Why didn't he just call the JL?" Tim grouches. "Causing a fuss for nothing."
"It's Bruce," Dick scoffs in return. "Who knows."
"You have to give us something," the host wheedles. "Why did someone curse Gotham's Prince."
Bruce stills for a beat, then makes eye contact with the camera. "Very well," he agrees, something severe overcoming him, the host practically salivating. "It's a test of devotion."
The host's eyes flick between him and the interpreter, eager. "Oh?"
"I upset the witch by protecting a dear friend that had incurred her wrath." A JL mission. "In her anger, she, as an empath, warned by dedication was unreturned by the person I saved."
"I knew B was rocky with the JL at the minute..." Dick bobs his head slowly. He hadn't realised things had deteriorated so badly.
"So what is the test?"
Bruce smiles sadly, still dazzling, and shrugs, palms up to the sky. "No one's noticed yet."
Dick chokes. Tim spits his water.
"Way to make us look like arseholes. We saw him on patrol just last night, he could at least give us a day to unhex him."
"And how long have you been cursed?" The host presses.
The interpreter grimaces, but Dick doesn't need to wait for him to speak, not when he saw Bruce's hands move himself.
Three weeks.
Whump culture be like
I need a hero
I’m planning hurt for my hero ‘til the end of the night
He’s gotta be kicked and he’s gotta be torn and he’s gotta be bruised from the fight
.
I need a hero
I’m laying waste to my hero ‘til the morning light
He’s gotta be starved and there’s gotta be blood and he’s gotta be scared for his life
@rangergirl3,
@highabovethecloudssomewhere,
HMMMMMMM
This is now stuck in my head and I will hear it when I roll over at 3:00 am. Thank you. Thank you so much.
Oh my they're still open? Uuuuuh.... Shit. Looking around for a prompt, but I'm in the middle of the highway.
Road trip! Batfam road trip!
Who's the first to drive? Who keeps getting shotgun? Do they rotate turns for the long trip? How many go in one car? How many cars do they use? Why does Dick always win shotgun whenever Bruce is driving? Is he cheating? Do they pass the wheel to Tim at some point and why the answer is fuck no? Did Damian succeed in taking the wheel after they stopped for gas? WHY DOES DICK KEEP WINNING SHOTGUN WHEN BRUCE'S DRIVING? Is that why Jason oopsies forgot about him in the gas station's bathroom and rode off without him? Ok Tim needs to figure out how the man keeps cheating his way into shotgun, that's insane.
Toodeloo!
@skinhorses 13!
"Explain."
"Hm?"
"Explain yourself."
"Well, my parents died when I was eight, that left a pretty big im—"
"Not that." Tim levels a finger at his face. "How did you get shotgun again? How do you always get it?"
Dick grins. "I'm just better than you."
Damian glowers. "I cried and somehow you still had the front seat. I want answers."
Tears streaming down his face, hitching breaths as he tried to stay quiet, undetected—
"How do you rig it?"
Jason glares at him. "Did Zatanna give you a spell? Raven, a portal?"
Dick snorts. "Yeah, she uses her powers to help me get a petty one-over on you guys for the front seat. Come on."
Dialing his team with trembling fingers, leaving a voice note pleading for one of them to take his place, he can't do this—
"We left you behind and you still got the front seat," Duke points out.
Dick rolls his eyes. "That's because Jason, in his hurry, also left Bruce behind. So now he's banned from driving."
Hands reaching for him, holding him close, apologies spilled out against his hairline even as he fought the embrace—
"We will find out your secret," Tim intones. Dick doesn't react, only offering a clueless smile.
"Sure you will."
The four of them stomp off to join Cass in the lobby of the hotel, and Dick grabs his bag from the footwell, blowing out a breath. They won't find out. They can't find out.
"They don't have a clue."
"Bruce!"
His father smiles, drawing closer, plucking the bag from his grip to sling over his own shoulder. "They're not even close to the truth, Dick. Don't worry."
He tries for a smile, but it sloughs off his face before it can fully form. "You sure?"
Walking onto the Batplane, freezing at the sight laid out before him. Jason, the new kid, in Dick's seat, right next to Bruce's own in the cockpit, slapping at Bruce's hands as he did up the belt to keep him in place.
Stumbling into the back of the plane, suddenly short of breath, the final straw breaking this camel's back as he secluded himself away to realise he was replaced.
Bruce finding him, holding him close, already figured out what happened and apologising, hugging him for the first time in nearly a year, his own tears spilling down his cheeks at his mistake.
The promise extracted after they returned from the mission, and Dick never sat anywhere but shotgun again. The one promise never broken, or faltereed, or wavered, through any of their fights over the years.
"I am sure." Bruce kisses his head firmly. "And even if they did figure it out, nothing would change, baby. I made you that promise ten years ago and I'll be damned if I break it now."
Dick chuckles weakly, pressing close, and allows himself to believe.
batman: the cult (1988)
Occa🥺
https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSQbbSNsh/
Can we have feral bat kids? 👉👈
I will preface by saying composure where? Everyone is losing their shit.
"Sound off!" Barbara orders, a hand pressed to her comm. She has all of her monitors set up, she can see the red dots in her peripheral, but she can't tear her eyes away from her main monitor.
Not when that is the screen where she is watching Batman die.
"Two minutes out," Nightwing pants.
"Turning onto Henel Ave; three minutes." His bike's engine roars, but she switches her attention to the growl of the Batmobile's engine.
"Catching up to Nightwing now, Oracle."
"Red Robin."
"I'll get there."
"Where are you?"
"I'll. Get. There."
"Then fucking hurry," she snaps back.
Bruce arches as another surge of electricity hits him, and Joker's laugh crackles through her headset. It sends a shiver down her spine, and she watches Bruce intently. He's too good to give Joker the satisfaction of the torture, he won't make a noise, but selfishly, she wishes he would. Just once. Something to let her know he's still breathing, the boys aren't too late, she hasn't just lost another person to the Joker.
"Medbay's ready," Duke reports. "Leslie's on the way, Alfred's ready to scrub in, Cass and I are ready to receive Bruce however you bring him in."
"You bring him in," Cass repeats, a demand.
"We will," Damian swears.
Dick's follow-up somehow doesn't feel like a reassurance. Or, not just a reassurance. Given how bad Bruce looks, it also stands to possibly be a goodbye.
"We're not coming back without him."
Barbara watches Joker throw his head back with a laugh, and two thugs lumber into frame, lugging with them—
"Hurry," she orders. "Bruce needs you."
"What's changed, O?"
"Joker has— fuck, I don't even know what it is, but it's clearly... fucking hurry up."
"I'm there, I'm here, where the fuck are you guys?!" Hood yells.
Dick heaves a deep, whistling breath. "Red?"
"I'm here, let's go—"
"Going dark," Damian rasps, and four beeps sound in her ear as they cut off their comm lines.
"Are they gonna make it?" Duke asks, and she presses her fingers to her mouth, watching the masked goons aim the whatever-the-fuck at Bruce's exposed, battered, bleeding chest.
"One bad day," Joker sing-songs. "You never agreed, Bats. Shall we find out whay your birdies think?"
Barbara breathes a sigh of relief as the flash of blue she glimpses in the pixelated shadows.
They made it.
Bruce is safe.
They converge around Joker, stepping out of the darkness to surround him from all sides.
Nightwing holds a glowing baton under his chin, and Joker tinkles a laugh that is cut off by the crackle of electricity.
"Let. Batman. Go."
Gonna start the new year with babygirlifying him to the max!!
And fight with Clark for a piece of that expensive ass
huge fan of the headcanon that Duke can just... turn invisible and no one except for the BatFam/certain Associates know/can avoid him
Like Bruce is leading Clark and Diana through the Manor and chatting and randomly walks around the middle of the hallway for no reason and Diana follows him while Clark just walks headfirst into Duke and neither Duke nor Bruce realized what they'd done
Tim is casually talking with a couple of friends he has over and randomly picks up a sandwich from the plate in the middle of the table and holds it over his shoulder where it just disappears
Steph is helping Alfred set the table and just shoves a glass bowl into the abyss and lets go and Alfred is two seconds away from screaming when he realizes 'oh, Duke is holding it' and Steph didn't even realize he wasn't visible.
Hal is gesturing while telling a story on the Watchtower and turns to look at nothing and goes "You were there, tell them" and the emptiness starts talking and Barry nearly has a heart attack until Duke flickers into existence.