Aren’t people who get married embarrassed at their wedding? I would be so embarrassed at everyone looking at me and listening to me talk about how much I love the other person. I’m gonna turn to them and say why don’t you all mind your own business
True story I have severe social anxiety and I can only remember about 5 seconds of my wedding ceremony (maybe 10 minutes long) and about 5 minutes total of the reception (about 2 hours long). We planned it so short to accommodate my hatred of being stared at, and yet here we are anyway, me with no memory. My brain blotted it all right the fuck out.
97% of my wedding photos are of me bright red and splotchy because of all the people staring at me.
This is why we got married alone. Our witnesses didn’t even know us and the whole process took 20 minutes. Then we went out for coffee and laughed about how awesome it was and everyone is doing it wrong.
I also had a really nice maple walnut blondie.
This is really true for me to. We did not write our own vows or do much of anything personalized at all during our wedding, because the significance of it would be completely overshadowed by my hatred for talking about our relationship in front of 100 people.
The email I sent to my brother (our officiant) the day that Paul and I got married:
I don’t know how you want to start things, if you have some general “we are gathered here today” stuff, but we can’t think of ANYTHING. It took us forever to find anything that wasn’t total cheese and sweetener. So you do the first part however you want, as long as it’s not “we are gathered here today”.
Then go into the ring exchange stuff and have us repeat this:
I, Paul, choose you, Erin, as my best friend for life, as my soulmate and companion, to be my wife, my partner, my friend, my confidant, my soulmate.
I, Erin, choose you, Paul, as my best friend for life, as my soulmate and companion, to be my husband, my partner, my friend, my confidant, my soulmate.
Then:
Do you, Paul, take Erin to be your wife?
Do you, Erin, take Paul to be your husband?
I assume we’ll both say yes.
I now pronounce you husband and wife, kiss the bride, blah blah.
Ours was very similar. Courthouse. Few friends and family. Like a Wednesday afternoon. Didn't do ring exchange bc we were already wearing them (so we didn't lose them) after it was all official everyone went out to lunch without us. We went home and went about our day.














