𝘢 𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘦

𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐢𝐭, 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 sebastian stan . forty . actor written by 𝐚𝐥𝐛𝐚 for 𝐛𝐮𝐳𝐳𝐡𝐪𝐬

[s-clafliin-deactivated20231113]

mate, that is just far too depressing to consider. next time i vote we just do something that does not involve being in a hotel with a bunch of twenty something year olds. i'm shocked at the amount of drama i've been hearing about. that brunch sounds absolutely horrific. what happened to just enjoying a meal and actually, talking with those around you? also, 'ratio'? what does that even mean? it's official, i'm too damn old. pip was angry with me that i had to leave again and i guess he decided to take it out on his bedroom wall with some bloody markers at laura's. i was thinking water but a juice box works too.

[basstan]

says the guy who's been hitting on a twenty something year old model? you sure you're ready to leave this place to be a part of depp's entourage? it has gotten to a point where i'm looking at this experience as a whole season of days of our lives. i'm just waiting on someone to get possessed by the late stefano dimera. alright, i had to google it. so apparently 'ratio' means if you get more comments than likes on a social media content. apparently it's not a good thing if you get more comments than.. likes. i don't fucking know.. pip is a creative spirit. leave him be, sam. juice box it is then.

[tcmholland]

while I hated the bullying at the time, i do miss doing interviews with you and mackie. i'd love to be a part of captain america! @basstan

[basstan]

you call it bullying it, we call it emphasizing facts. can you look me dead in the eye and tell me that you didn't put yourself in postions where some things had to be said? you're a walking spoiler, holland.

[blcrson]

this isn't awkward at all... i can't remember the last time we were in the same room, let alone conversed. how have you been? @basstan

[basstan]

it's strictly up to you if you want it to be awkward between us. i've been good and chill for the most part. what about you? still looking pretty as hell i see.

[alexaschung]

── 𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓 ➤ 𝐒𝐄𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐍

alexa: tell me whats the richest thing you've ever done ?? alexa: and no need to be modest. you're like a mega movie star correct ?? you've probably done some outrageous stuff. [@basstan]

[basstan]

sebastian: the richest thing i've ever done? yeah i got it. sebastian: you ready? sebastian: said "keep the change" which was about $2 sebastian: you'll be surprised to know that i've never been one to openly flaunt my wealth.

[e-olsen]

doctor mom? take that back! seb, i'm not bragging, i'm just stating simple facts. also i'm pretty sure you find it adorable, not annoying. i seriously am doubting that you honestly expected to find relaxation with the amount of people here. i don't remember you being this sensitive when i first met you! i'm just saying, don't be mad at him for being young like you once were. abs chiseled from stone? i'm starting to think you have a crush. need i remind you, the amount of women that are absolutely in love with you? you should know better than to think i'm going to mindlessly agree with you.

[basstan]

never! when you deliberately brag about being more prepared and mock my lack of precautions, then we got an issue. i'd say that it's closing in on a fifty fifty situation here. now here's how i saw it on the morning of hangover ragnarök. i was fairly certain that most people were sound asleep in their rooms, hence why i thought i had the pool area to myself. not sensitive! just stating facts. i wouldn't go as far as to say that i'm crushing on him. am i a tad bit jealous of him? yes. there's also a huge difference between sending cartoon-styled heart eyes and shooting someone an evil glare, so no, liz i'm not crushing on him. they are infatuated by the idea of me but they don't know me.

[unearthlydust]

SEBASTIAN STAN Bupkis (2023)

[peterdvidsn]

@basstan

[alexaschung]

alexachung: i think by this point i have champagne running through my veins. now it's time to bathe in it. supposedly it's good for your skin.

[basstan]

sebastianstan: said by only rich people.

[basstan]

could it be that i spotted you on the red carpet giving all the couples side eyes? i'm here to let you know that i was right there with you. i have an idea - at the next party we should at least get together and grab a fruity drink while sending them all evil glares. you in? / @jvsmiins

[e-olsen]

i'm sorry, you decided to drink without hydrating or even getting ahead of it by taking some meds? it sounds like i did the same thing as you but i handled it way differently. that's, uh, i'm sorry, that's just kind of hilarious. you literally tormented yourself while hungover by going down by a pool filled with people. why didn't you reach out to me this morning? i cured my hangover by going and getting a hot stone massage as well as a facial. don't be angry at mendes for being a twenty something year old who can bounce back better than you. first off, i was out with the girls so i couldn't have monitored your alcohol intake. second, this is supposed to be relaxing so why are we going to the gym?

[basstan]

i'm sorry, i obviously forgot the part where you were pretending to be doctor mom. you don't need to brag about being the responsible one, liz. i'm beginning to suspect a little sassiness from you and i'm not sure if i think it's adorable or just plain annoying. i'm glad you find that amusing, me however, not so much. here i thought that i'd be getting some much needed relaxation, perhaps snatch forty winks on a sunbed. to hell with despacito. why are you defending him when we both know he's only shaking his tail feather because he's well aware that he's got abs chiseled from stone. the audacity really. - because i'm starting to develop a inferiority complex, liz. work with me here.

[s-clafliin-deactivated20231113]

it's times like these that make me realize that i have clearly lost my mind. otherwise there is no way on god's green earth i would have agreed to being out so late and waking up feeling like death. on top of that, i got a call from laura that pip got into a spot of trouble. how in the world did i used to balance any of this? i would say i need a pint but clearly the universe is so against that. @basstan

[basstan]

who's to say that we didn't already lose our minds, sam? let's take a look at the facts for a solid second, shall we? we purposely decided to reside with a bunch of twenty year olds in a very secluded area, instead of joining depp and his group of sophisticated generation x's somewhere downtown. we're now forced to wake up to the sound of doja cat blasting through the halls, as we're trying to catch some much needed sleep. all through brunch i had to listen to a group of girls repeating 'no chill' and 'ratio' while being more focused on getting the perfect food content for their ig stories than actually eating from their plates. we're doomed. what did pip do? should we go get a juice box?

[basstan]

so last night i made the huge mistake of consuming too much alcohol, which of course led to a severe hangover the following morning. now, under normal circumstances i would've been able to drag my body through it, but i'm also at that age where it feels like i'm legitimately going to die — a very slow, very painful death, might I add. but then i found myself by the pool, just hating every single person breathing, when i spotted a group of elderly women doing water zumba. music is pumping, despacito all around and then i see it.. fucking mendes and his twenty-something biceps performing a perfect salsa, when i know he was drunk as a skunk last night. what i'm saying is, liz - next time i expect you to help me reduce my alcohol intake, but also join me at the gym. / @e-olsen

[basstan]

sebastian stan attends the 2023 cannes film festival

[unearthlydust]

SEBASTIAN STAN as BUCKY BARNES The Falcon and The Winter Soldier (2021)