#extradirty
todays bird
Xuebing Du
Sade Olutola
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Cosmic Funnies
Andulka
Sweet Seals For You, Always
occasionally subtle
dirt enthusiast
roma★
almost home
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
trying on a metaphor
⁂
Today's Document
DEAR READER
Misplaced Lens Cap
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@battle-pass-guy
"Hey, fucke "I mean potential customers!"
"You can call me... uh..." "Battle... pass... guy. Yeah that works."
"I'm here to sell you THE BATTLE PASS."
"You like Exclamania, don't ya?"
"Well enjoy it more with all the perks my battlepass has to offer!"
"Just sign the contract, give me your credit card information, and get to battle-passing!"
"So" "Some of you have been asking where this white void is and where it is in relation to my office where I do the battle pass shit that I don't fucking care about" "Actually nobody was asking but I'm saying it anyway."
"It's just right through that door there. Yeah it's a load zone. Real simple"
"wait when did that other door get there"
"..." "that's probably nothing"
"'Battle Pass Guy' was some bullshit I made up on the spot when I realized I could actually have a name in this place but now I'm too attached to it to change it."
[@battle-pass-guy allowed access to ]
"Hey. fuckers five" "I need your help with something" "apparently Elysium has some forums where devs and the rumored Other Types Of People Who Work On Games talk and I want in."
"Hmm." "So fuckers three, then?" "Anyway I'll send you the link."
[BPG thinks really hard about the appropriate link.]
[BPG is suddenly holding the Crystallized Memory of Forums]
"k thanks that's all I needed" "I'm not going to repay you because I think this is a reward in of itself for you" "also I'm just like that. fuck are you gonna do about it, stop being a virus?"
[BPG disallowed access to ]
[@battle-pass-guy allowed access to ]
"Hey. fuckers five" "I need your help with something" "apparently Elysium has some forums where devs and the rumored Other Types Of People Who Work On Games talk and I want in."
"Hmm." "So fuckers three, then?" "Anyway I'll send you the link."
[BPG thinks really hard about the appropriate link.]
[BPG is suddenly holding the Crystallized Memory of Forums]
"k thanks that's all I needed" "I'm not going to repay you because I think this is a reward in of itself for you" "also I'm just like that. fuck are you gonna do about it, stop being a virus?"
[BPG disallowed access to ]
[@battle-pass-guy allowed access to ]
"Hey. fuckers five" "I need your help with something" "apparently Elysium has some forums where devs and the rumored Other Types Of People Who Work On Games talk and I want in."
"Hmm." "So fuckers three, then?" "Anyway I'll send you the link."
[BPG thinks really hard about the appropriate link.]
[+ 1 mildly corrupted map to the oracles house]
[he creates a copy and then burns the one you gave him]
"Got it, thanks.]
I N33D YOUR H3LP TO MURD3R SOM3ON3. A PLAY3R.
@th3-oracl3
"Damn. So you were all lying to me when you said murder was bad. Okay. Fine. Whatever." "Step into my office."
"A player, you say? That's my target demographic. What's in for me?"
FROM WHAT I'V3 GATH3R3D ABOUT YOU TH3 THING THAT'S IN IT FOR YOU IS COMMITING MURD3R
"Can't blame you for assuming that."
"The thing is, end of the day, I'm still Battle Pass Guy. I gotta sell battle passes." "Can't just murder a potential customer."
THIS ASSHOL3 I WANT D3AD WOULDN'T PAY FOR IT 3V3N WITH INGAM3 CURR3NCY. H3'D JUST CH3AT HIS WAY INTO G3TTING IT THROUGH SOM3 BULLSHIT LUCK MAGIC.
"Unfortunately him, I deal in real world currencies, like..." "Fuck was it? Bahollers?" "Why does a clearly english speaking games studio deal in some foreign currency not known to any english speaking country?"
"Actually fuck giving money to HQ, they won't miss one guy. Show me what he looks like."
HIS NAM3'S TH3 GAMBLR, H3 SP3AKS WITH A LOT OF WORDS STARTING WITH G, H3'S GR33N, H3 CARRI3S A DI3 AROUND, H3 SUCKS, I HAT3 HIM, AND-
[he goes on and on about how much the Gambler sucks.]
"Not an actual visual description." "Okay new plan, give me a couple of hours and I'll create some item that'll brick his game as soon as it enters his inventory. Like a fucking." "chunk ban or something."
SOUNDS GOOD! YOU KNOW WH3R3 TO FIND M3!
[He leaves.]
"N-" "No I don't."
I N33D YOUR H3LP TO MURD3R SOM3ON3. A PLAY3R.
@th3-oracl3
"Damn. So you were all lying to me when you said murder was bad. Okay. Fine. Whatever." "Step into my office."
"A player, you say? That's my target demographic. What's in for me?"
FROM WHAT I'V3 GATH3R3D ABOUT YOU TH3 THING THAT'S IN IT FOR YOU IS COMMITING MURD3R
"Can't blame you for assuming that."
"The thing is, end of the day, I'm still Battle Pass Guy. I gotta sell battle passes." "Can't just murder a potential customer."
THIS ASSHOL3 I WANT D3AD WOULDN'T PAY FOR IT 3V3N WITH INGAM3 CURR3NCY. H3'D JUST CH3AT HIS WAY INTO G3TTING IT THROUGH SOM3 BULLSHIT LUCK MAGIC.
"Unfortunately him, I deal in real world currencies, like..." "Fuck was it? Bahollers?" "Why does a clearly english speaking games studio deal in some foreign currency not known to any english speaking country?"
"Actually fuck giving money to HQ, they won't miss one guy. Show me what he looks like."
HIS NAM3'S TH3 GAMBLR, H3 SP3AKS WITH A LOT OF WORDS STARTING WITH G, H3'S GR33N, H3 CARRI3S A DI3 AROUND, H3 SUCKS, I HAT3 HIM, AND-
[he goes on and on about how much the Gambler sucks.]
"Not an actual visual description." "Okay new plan, give me a couple of hours and I'll create some item that'll brick his game as soon as it enters his inventory. Like a fucking." "chunk ban or something."
I N33D YOUR H3LP TO MURD3R SOM3ON3. A PLAY3R.
@th3-oracl3
"Damn. So you were all lying to me when you said murder was bad. Okay. Fine. Whatever." "Step into my office."
"A player, you say? That's my target demographic. What's in for me?"
FROM WHAT I'V3 GATH3R3D ABOUT YOU TH3 THING THAT'S IN IT FOR YOU IS COMMITING MURD3R
"Can't blame you for assuming that."
"The thing is, end of the day, I'm still Battle Pass Guy. I gotta sell battle passes." "Can't just murder a potential customer."
THIS ASSHOL3 I WANT D3AD WOULDN'T PAY FOR IT 3V3N WITH INGAM3 CURR3NCY. H3'D JUST CH3AT HIS WAY INTO G3TTING IT THROUGH SOM3 BULLSHIT LUCK MAGIC.
"Unfortunately him, I deal in real world currencies, like..." "Fuck was it? Bahollers?" "Why does a clearly english speaking games studio deal in some foreign currency not known to any english speaking country?"
"Actually fuck giving money to HQ, they won't miss one guy. Show me what he looks like."
I N33D YOUR H3LP TO MURD3R SOM3ON3. A PLAY3R.
@th3-oracl3
"Damn. So you were all lying to me when you said murder was bad. Okay. Fine. Whatever." "Step into my office."
"A player, you say? That's my target demographic. What's in for me?"
FROM WHAT I'V3 GATH3R3D ABOUT YOU TH3 THING THAT'S IN IT FOR YOU IS COMMITING MURD3R
"Can't blame you for assuming that."
"The thing is, end of the day, I'm still Battle Pass Guy. I gotta sell battle passes." "Can't just murder a potential customer."
I N33D YOUR H3LP TO MURD3R SOM3ON3. A PLAY3R.
@th3-oracl3
"Damn. So you were all lying to me when you said murder was bad. Okay. Fine. Whatever." "Step into my office."
"A player, you say? That's my target demographic. What's in for me?"
"Someone help me come up with names and personalities with these guys" "So that instead of statues that feel pain they're actual people." "who feel pain"
"Hello?" "Can anyone hear me?" "I don't know where I am. I'm..." "I don't remember anything, except my name. I'm-"
"..." "Someone else is here."
"Hi. Ignore that." "Please contribute to help me finish crowdsourcing personalities and identities."
"Someone help me come up with names and personalities with these guys" "So that instead of statues that feel pain they're actual people." "who feel pain"
Hello
Why is the feeling pain part so important?
I would also like to know why the pain is important
“Shhhhshhshhshshhhhshhh”
These are the arcs as I understand them:
Gabriel (all characters involved are dead)
Battle Pass (all characters owned by the same person)
Nuke (has not started yet)
Peri (I don't know what's going on with that but it was just the one person working on it last I checked)
There is no problem with exclamania. Everything is normal
[Boooooring. Wanna help me start a new arc]
"Someone help me come up with names and personalities with these guys" "So that instead of statues that feel pain they're actual people." "who feel pain"
