he tried to suidice at his 12

in the time between us

[balaclava-trismegistus]

Just saw my doctor type "FUCKED FOR LIFE" on my chart then he turned the screen away and stopped making eye contact with me

[drops-of-universe]

please dont vape your blueberry ice flavor around my kid. we are raising him on marlboro reds exclusively.

[ophianoi]

constantine, 2005

[detectivehole]

[comment-tube]

[murraysiskind-deactivated202511]

Me: Tom Cruise I picked up more plain steamed fish for you to eat for every meal because of your pathologies

Tom Cruise: thank you so much. By the way I feel that we have been through enough together - you doing a Misery on me and breaking both my legs, etc - that you can just call me Tom

Me: Thank you for saying that Tom Cruise

[ca-dmv-bot]

Customer: I LOVE PUKE DMV: I LOVE PUKE Verdict: DENIED

[glubby]

i would like a hug…. JUST KIDDING! i would like TWO hugs. (suddenly becomes cold and standoffish) i don’t need anything or anyone and i don’t want to talk about it.

[a-pile-of-dolls]

[markovchaingang]

you guys do realise walking doesn't actually move you anywhere right? it just destroys you entirely and places a perfect copy of you right in front of where you were standing

[fairycosmos]

this lifetime is very bizarre and then youre not even supposed to also be bizarre. Ok

[earhartsease]

on it boss

[qrgirl-deactivated20220303]

anybody else having coffee rn lol...probably not. its a little underground

[bippus]

when i was born they rushed all the nurses into the room. called the whole hospital. Here’s the baby that doesn’t cry they said

[sagehole]

we love to applaud performative masculinity

[bippus]

I was a stoic

[telepathylove]

in the chillest possible way,

[risk-repeater]

*making two dolls kiss and dropping them both out nowhere, all the emotion and life leaving my face* right. enough of that.

[achillesinhighheels]